Inward Observation with simultaneous Outward Observation.

[Faith]

You not sharing a common interest with a group or a person not sharing a common interest with you is all part of life now the mental thought loop of all that extra junk I'm not good enough they are going to see I don't have the same interest something negative is going to happen now these though loops are called programs Laura has a great post about programs in a section here on the forum these program come from traumatic situation in childhood maybe even teenage yrs/young adult...

I guess I am too identified with these intimidating thoughts which leads to thinking onesided. After my dancing lesson my situation didn't feel so grim anymore, which shows that I was drown in those negative emotions before. It influenced my judgment. Afterwards my judgment wasn't that clouded anymore. It seems that I am easily carried away by negative or positive emotions. I try to work on that but I still have difficulties with it. Thanks for your point of view.

 

[whitecoast]

Then you switch to the emotional side, sensing your gut feelings, the affects you're going through--stripped of mental content as much as possible--, and possibly the feelings others around you engender.

I'm focusing on my gut feelings right now and I'm not sure what I'm feeling. I'd say there is allways something but I can't tell what it means. It's kind of diffuse. If a thought occurs that reminds me of something, let's say, "unpleasant", or "pleasant" I experience a peak that I can label with a word easily. I wonder if there are allways emotions and I just can't distinguish the more subtle ones yet or if there are times where there are no emotions at all. What do you think about that?

I think all those experiences are totally normal. And yeah as you learn to pay attention to those internal feelings in your body in more and more situations, you get much better at seeing how parts of you feel about certain things.

Of course, it can be difficult to remember yourself in emotional situations, when emotions start to hijack your mental center and prevent it from objectively examining your emotions, gut feelings, and posture and whether those feelings are appropriate for the situation you face. Knowing so doesn't make the emotion vanish, but it can prevent you from doing something you may regret.

 

[Menna]

Do these unpleasant emotions cause unpleasant thoughts and then do you hold onto these thoughts? I feel that unpleasant and pleasant emotions effect my intillectual center/body differently. Pleasant emotions don't have such a "hold" on my intellectual center they are enjoiyable and pass through my body easier then unpleasant emotions. Unpleasant emotions create unpleasant thoughts and then unpleasant feelings. I use to feel I have to "do" something to get rid of this negative feeling however the most effective thing to do IMO is let it pass/run its course through the body. There is more truth on the otherside of the unpleasant feeling.

 

[Faith]

I think all those experiences are totally normal. And yeah as you learn to pay attention to those internal feelings in your body in more and more situations, you get much better at seeing how parts of you feel about certain things.

Of course, it can be difficult to remember yourself in emotional situations, when emotions start to hijack your mental center and prevent it from objectively examining your emotions, gut feelings, and posture and whether those feelings are appropriate for the situation you face. Knowing so doesn't make the emotion vanish, but it can prevent you from doing something you may regret.

I need to remind me that every situation, no matter how uncomfortable, is a great opportunity to observe and learn. Like... "What a lucky day! I feel like crab!" My default feeling seems to be something like feeling hurt, being sad maybe... it's hard to tell, because it's something I got used to. Whatever I wanna do in such a mood, organizing my duties or organizing my freetime meets this barrier of weariness and it feels as if I have to force myself to do anything at all. Otherwise I would just sit there like catatonic. It's quite often that way. This leads to feeling completely useless. What I think would be a good thing to do, is not what I feel. Quite often there is an opposition between what I think and what I feel, leading to all this "I should" and "I must"-stressing. If I want this or that, then why do I have to force myself? Why do I have the impression that I'm sailing against the wind? What I want seems rather theoretical. Is it the false personality that is posing and answering all questions without a glue of what my true self really wants? But sometimes doing things is fun, but it's kind of random, nothing I can control. Even my therapist says, I have to practice "having fun". EE sometimes replaces this weariness with joy. I want to practice it more often. However, I'm eager to observe my feelings.

I use to feel I have to "do" something to get rid of this negative feeling however the most effective thing to do IMO is let it pass/run its course through the body. There is more truth on the otherside of the unpleasant feeling.

How does this work? Is it like in the "Depression as a Stepping Stone"-thread, stop thinking about anything and just be the vessel of unpleasant feelings? Now that I mention it, maybe I should re-read this thread.

 

[Faith]

I wish Gurdjieff was here. I would ask him to hypnotize me in order to isolate my true self and let me speak. Maybe what I really want is just a spoon full of that marvelous jam over there. Oh boy! :P I was stressing myself today, begging me to paint a picture. But what I really wanted was to reply to these posts, leaving me with the bad feeling of not having painted a picture... again. I haven't done anything artistic for a couple of years, just painted for money. It's a good thing, that I can make a living out of it and I'm grateful for that, but I feel an urge to explore my own art further. I have many ideas, when there is no time, but when I get the time, nada. However this is just an example of my conflicting I's state of mind.

 

[Menna]

I use to feel I have to "do" something to get rid of this negative feeling however the most effective thing to do IMO is let it pass/run its course through the body. There is more truth on the otherside of the unpleasant feeling.

How does this work?

In reading your posts it seems that before your dance class you are in a negative state. It seems this way because you say you feel positive after the class so in your case I would practice self remembering before your class to see what is your inner state. This inner state will have a different feel then your inner state after class. After practice at this there will come a time where you catch yourself as your inner state changes to negative because you will feel it. When you come to this point that is when the running its course takes place. The negative emotion will take hold of your intellectual center however if you can identify the negative emotion you can accept it and protect your intellectual center from being controlled by the negative emotion by using your will.

"I caught you not going to let you control my mind"