spyraal
Jedi Master
The Lord decided that it was time for Him to introduce his Commandments to mankind.
Considering the power structure of the time, he first visited the Romans.
So, He materializes himself during a roman orgy. Everyone is left stunned. A centurion first dares to ask:
-"Who are you?"
-"I am the Lord" comes the answer.
-"And why are you here?" asks the centurion.
-"I am here to give you the Commandments!", says the Lord.
-"What do these commandmets say?", wonders someone.
-"For example", says the Lord "one of them is Do Not Lie!"
(laughter from the crowd in the orgy)
-"Listen" says the centurion, "we are the Romans and we do not mind a good lie when we have to. Why don't try somewhere else to see if anyone is interested?"
So the Lord decides to try his luck with the Egyptians and materializes himself during one of their feasts:
-"Who are you? asks someone.
-"I am the Lord"
-"And why are you here?"
-"I came to you to give you the Commandments!"
-"And what do these commandmets say?" asks a man.
-"For example", says the Lord "one of them is Do Worship Any Other Gods!"
(Laughter from all present)
-"Listen" says a priest, "we are the Egyptians and we have our own gods for some time now. Why don't try somewhere else to see if anyone is interested?"
So the Lord upset and running out of choices, decides to go to the Jews. He materializes Himself during a jewish celebration where Moses was present:
-"Who are you?" Moses asks.
-"I am the Lord"
-"And why are you here?"
-"I came to you to give you the Commandments!"
-"Hmmm...And what is the price of the Commandmets, how much do you charge for a piece? asks Moses
-"What is the PRICE you ask me??" the stunned Lord wonders. "No-one ever asked me that question before! I guess they are for free..."
-"For... FREE??" says Moses while staring the others in his table in a meaningfull way. "Are you sure?"
-"Yes" answers the Lord.
-"What a bargain! GIVE ME TEN OF THEM !!" shouts Moses.
So now we dealt with that issue! That's how it happened from "valid sources". I wonder why no-one consults me when writing school books... What a waste!
Considering the power structure of the time, he first visited the Romans.
So, He materializes himself during a roman orgy. Everyone is left stunned. A centurion first dares to ask:
-"Who are you?"
-"I am the Lord" comes the answer.
-"And why are you here?" asks the centurion.
-"I am here to give you the Commandments!", says the Lord.
-"What do these commandmets say?", wonders someone.
-"For example", says the Lord "one of them is Do Not Lie!"
(laughter from the crowd in the orgy)
-"Listen" says the centurion, "we are the Romans and we do not mind a good lie when we have to. Why don't try somewhere else to see if anyone is interested?"
So the Lord decides to try his luck with the Egyptians and materializes himself during one of their feasts:
-"Who are you? asks someone.
-"I am the Lord"
-"And why are you here?"
-"I came to you to give you the Commandments!"
-"And what do these commandmets say?" asks a man.
-"For example", says the Lord "one of them is Do Worship Any Other Gods!"
(Laughter from all present)
-"Listen" says a priest, "we are the Egyptians and we have our own gods for some time now. Why don't try somewhere else to see if anyone is interested?"
So the Lord upset and running out of choices, decides to go to the Jews. He materializes Himself during a jewish celebration where Moses was present:
-"Who are you?" Moses asks.
-"I am the Lord"
-"And why are you here?"
-"I came to you to give you the Commandments!"
-"Hmmm...And what is the price of the Commandmets, how much do you charge for a piece? asks Moses
-"What is the PRICE you ask me??" the stunned Lord wonders. "No-one ever asked me that question before! I guess they are for free..."
-"For... FREE??" says Moses while staring the others in his table in a meaningfull way. "Are you sure?"
-"Yes" answers the Lord.
-"What a bargain! GIVE ME TEN OF THEM !!" shouts Moses.
So now we dealt with that issue! That's how it happened from "valid sources". I wonder why no-one consults me when writing school books... What a waste!
