I practically walked "alone". The way I was raised led me to family detachment. I don't have brothers, I don't want marriage, I haven't had wives and I don't know what it feels like to want to have one or to want to have children. I really don't want to create a family in this world. Those kind of emotions are not part of me.
Could you describe what it would be beyond the emotional?
I understand what you are saying but I am commenting on something and you are bringing up a separate point although you told me more about your personal individual dynamic so that is helpful. Let me elaborate.
Lets say you have situation A - A long time "human" you share interests, experiences and spend a good amount of time together. Lets say this human sits you down and says I no longer want to see you and no longer wan't to be "friends"... To me this will have an emotional impact and will impact you from a leisure, personal, semi intimate dynamic but not so much survival or basic instinct dynamic. You will not have a problem surviving in reality/life as much as compared to the below
Lets say you have situation B - A long time "human" you share interests, experiences and spend a good amount of time together. On top of this - this human has a place of employment. The human wants you to work for said company and says their company is in good financial health and everything will work out they say you will have a good salary (resources) for years. You are currently employed and live 20hr drive away. You now move from your home, quit your job and relocate. Now this human 3 months after you move says the company is going bankrupt, you are fired and they have no time for you - well I would be affected more than just emotionally in this situation - this is how I relate what I said above to family.
Situation A is more casual, you share life/reality with this person sparingly and that persons words, promises, trends, indications do not have such an impact on ALL of your centers. Mostly just emotional and not seeing or if said friend in situation A leaves you or betrays you - you had no dependence, counting on, life/reality importance with said friend. You will hurt emotionally but it is not so severe as situation B.
Situation B I used the word human and when I mentioned family or partner you countered and said you don't have much experience in that realm. So I used a life/reality situation to try and relate what would be beyond emotional. Obviously, in situation B this human, gave you data, information, indication and so on not just from a friend/enjoyment standpoint but now you depended, counted and accounted for them and changed your life/reality becoming closer ... almost like a partner/wife/husbands. Now if this human lies, betrays, runs away and you depended on this "human" for money, housing thus shelter and food well this friend who is now closer to family or partner their decisions will most likely activate not just your emotional center but intellectual and survival (basic instincts) physical.
A friend or acquaintance that you enjoy dinner with once a month and have known for some time can not affects your centers in such a way as a human in situation B. - Since you mentioned you are mostly alone and weren't close or detached from family this was the best 4th way/life/reality way to describe what I was talking about...
Well, that for me would be over-thinking things. If you have an lighter you can only be kind or not be kind.
I had a person who always asked me for money and because I didn't know how to say no and because of fear and above all because here the reason for giving money to a homeless person is very different from the one you raise. They are not homeless here, they are drug addicts that if you don't give them, they can even rob you as retaliation or worse, so giving them money is more like buying your security on the street.
And in that case, well, I am not in the obligation to maintain their vices.
Regarding my example I was responding by saying the homeless man created a reaction in my emotional center but like you mentioned acquaintance or stranger I controlled the reaction/emotion to be practical and do the most practical empathetic thing I could do in the situation and gave him more than what he asked for this interaction took 10 second. - I understand what you are sayin and I have been in hard times/places and over years I have worked attained a goal to get to better situations. While I paid for my safety/freedom from less optimal decisions then in private I worked toward bettering my reality...
Yes, it will depend exactly on what you express, your focus and how you invest your energy. The opposite happens to me, to "make my be
The goal at least for me in THE WORK is to lesson what happens to me and more take action or be able to DO actually DO with my physical, emotional, intellectual center to work toward what I wan't. With the experience and wisdom of the past and knowledge to know I can handle pretty much anything that happens to me with confidence. I would like to meet someone and engage in a relationship I know what takes me farther away from this goal and what takes me closer. A small example is I changed my reading time to before bed so I can fall asleep fast and reduce artificial light before bed so I can have more energy and being for the day and the people in it. But I had to be able to DO this small thing. Break daily habits, less late night movies/podcast/informative videos...Being tired in the morning or not having as much energy during the day no longer HAPPENS TO ME.
Now I try to pay attention to people in general as what they are "the other faces of God" that are manifested in their reason for being in life, in my life. And boy did they surprise me.
I recenty had to end a 25 year friendship and 15 year friendship respectively. I had to be able to DO that by controlling my centers and emotions. Boy did these people surprise me after all those years of impressions and data from them and then a switch up. All we can do is keep it moving toward what we want and if we go toward what we want and realize its not actually what we want we adjust the decision making.
People who have been lonely in a great way, the signs are a little different in their way of manifesting to those who have ample friends or family 24/7, who listen to them, who go out to distract themselves, to share a drink and talk about something or about this material if they are collinear, or at least that they can be counted on one hand. I just have my head, signs and this forum.
This kind of sounds like victim mentality which is closely related to personality disorder attributes. I am not trying to be mean or disrespectful but just commenting on what I am reading and what I know...
This material and finding this forum IMO is a rare occurrence how many people are on this planet? You say you have your head, signs (data gathering) and this forum to me this means your cup is not full and you are smart enough to gather information and set sail in the direction you want. If you have 10 "friends" and 7 family members always contacting you and calling you and texting you there may not be enough time for you to work on and learn about yourself and why you chose to reincarnate here and experience your consciousness. If you are on this forum then you also have a computer and or phone, internet connection, a work station or room to read, network, ponder, study...To me this last paragraph reads to me as you are looking over at your neighbors house saying they have a pool, nice car and their grass is greener than yours... The neighbor will always "have more" if you are constantly looking at their achievements ... focus on your own...and building toward your own...
Hopefully my English/words I chose are not offensive only expounding on what I said and commenting on your last paragraph to me dips into the realm of self pity. This is fine and creates an opportunity for space to explore. If you felt fulfilled and busy you would most likely not have time for ............ a new goal.... I admittedly am somewhat fulfilled in areas of my life but not in others so I work and explore and strive in those areas and try and make better choices to attain while maintain or slightly adjusting to optimize the areas I am fulfilled.
I have been homecoming King, played College sports, on TV, in relationships, part of large family and I have also slept on the floor for half a year, worked 70hrs a week, lonely and in despair... I had moments of happiness in all dynamics in the aforementioned and there are negatives and positives to the dynamics mentioned too. I am trying to create more balance more and more work on myself gain knowledge/data/wisdom and create improve my reality....
