Old times ... Expectations ... Wishful thinking

[Alma.Innovadora]

It's alive, a the battle is communicated.

Exactly. We must always try to be as conscious as possible that the battle is every second through us, even when we can detect the attack vectors, it is still through us.

From a recent experience, after so many years, I decided to throw away my ego and resentment and to stop having those absurd battles inside me. Now that I feel fulfilled, I try to maintain that balance in all areas of my life, in my interactions with a heart at least "purified" enough to be able to love/know them for what they are. That does not mean that others will change and sometimes even intensifies, but that you have gained a little more control over yourself to know how to accept and deal assertively with these situations of natural duality of life and allow everything to flow.

It's hard not to react to robots, damned hard, you "fail" over and over again, but the more aware you become of those failures, the less you give up your self-control.

 

[finch]

Yes, I think that was part of it. And I re-read my post today and I think it's written maybe a bit muddled, I'm sorry about that. So with too little context.
I've mentioned before here in my veggie thread that I've had a difficult relationship with my mother at times and I've spent my life trying to please her and I often felt like I wasn't enough for her. I think that's why I adapted some of my behaviours to hers (like being vegetarian at the time).
And at that concert I realised or it could be that I was there for my mother, so to speak. But in the end it was good because I became aware of some things, about myself and also this skin-deep and concentrated behaviour of the people around me. It was good to experience this and for example not to clap at the statements about Putin, no matter what someone on my right or left thinks.
Maybe I was too theatrical, but I just had to share these thoughts with you.

I appreciate you put up the link to your veggie thread... and I understand from what you wrote that your relationship with your mother was difficult at times and complex. I think these times are hard, and I think you did great at the concert dealing with all the thoughts and emotions you had--you even found much of it useful to you!