"presence" & terror

[RedFox]

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Something like this happened to me last night. I came to - though still very hazy and confused - and it suddenly became very quiet, the sensations of my limbs sort of withdrew inwards, and I had a very intense fear of impending death; my first thought was that something cataclysmic had occurred and we were all going to be destroyed at any moment. It was the silence more than anything that unnerved me; like all the air was being sucked away causing a vacuum.

Could it have possibly been sleep paralysis? I use to think I'd woken up (may even have woken up fully for a split second) but then slip instantly into half sleep/sleep paralysis. That would always make me panic!!!
Last time this happened (about 6months ago?, I think I posted about it elsewhere on the forum) I has enough awareness to get myself out of it without panicing.

Might've been that cheese pizza I had hours earlier. :/

Apparently cheese gives you nightmares! lol....perhaps the blood just wnet to your stomach?

A few nights ago, I started to wake up in my dream, feeling my whole body lying on the side, I was aware that i was dreaming because the images where displayed on the front of my head and i was watching them as if I was at the movie, in a dark room.
I suddenly felt like some thoughts were pushed inside my head from the top and I started squirming inside my own body, I then started to shout silently "leave me alone!!", I am not sure now but i felt like i was trying to curl up to protect myself.
I started to feel very sad and despaired and the last thing i saw when i really woke up was an image of an old vinyl record being flipped on the other side.
I was pretty shaken up and I could not sleep for a while.

The last image of the vinyl record makes me think either of a program of mine that I have to get rid of by changing the tune or it is an image of the predator within that plays me like a tune, it just has to flip the vinyl over to start again.

Interesting, reminds me of something I read that Laura wrote about. Unfortunatly I can't remember enough about it to find the link. In her case the C's mentioned it was something todo with fighting a negative alternative self (or so I vaughly remember)
Whatever it was...internal or external, it may well be worth observing the reaction it triggered in you. That could well be the record that was intended to be played.
In what other times in your life have you felt the need to curl up to protect yourself, what emotions and thoughts and memories go with it, and can you learn enough about it to not 'react' in that way anymore? :)
That kind of how I overcame the sleep paralysis fear, although maybe not as conciousely.

 

[Craig]

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Something like this happened to me last night. I came to - though still very hazy and confused - and it suddenly became very quiet, the sensations of my limbs sort of withdrew inwards, and I had a very intense fear of impending death; my first thought was that something cataclysmic had occurred and we were all going to be destroyed at any moment. It was the silence more than anything that unnerved me; like all the air was being sucked away causing a vacuum.

Could it have possibly been sleep paralysis?

Well yeah, that's why I wrote it in the thread discussing sleep paralysis :P (and hypnagogic hallucinations... if that is merely what they are). I have physical symptoms of stress at the minute, so it's probably just another manifestation of that.

 

[Tigersoap]

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Whatever it was...internal or external, it may well be worth observing the reaction it triggered in you. That could well be the record that was intended to be played.

Hey thanks, I did not thought about the link between my inner state (sad and despaired) and the record image I had.
It's something I have been working on a long time, trying to get to the bottom of these sad feelings.

In what other times in your life have you felt the need to curl up to protect yourself, what emotions and thoughts and memories go with it, and can you learn enough about it to not 'react' in that way anymore? :)
That kind of how I overcame the sleep paralysis fear, although maybe not as conciousely.

I am not sure I have un-curled yet ;), I am sometimes like a huge hedgehog :D (I just don't catch coins while spinning).
Thanks Redfox !

 

[darknics]

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Well I also had a similar experience quite recently and I had been wondering what that was. Just before waking up I wanted to move and I was completely paralyzed. The strange thing was that I heard some funny "buzzing noises", and felt like something or someone was sipping something out of my throat through a tube. I could not turn my head and look, it was all out of my visual perspective because I was then facing a wall in my room.
My first reaction was at that moment to: "leave it alone it will go away soon enough , it is trying to take something from me (what???) but it will not succeed. Then I started to feel amused and soon enough it went away.
I guess I am just curious but a part of me seems to already have the answer I just don't know it consciously yet and that bugs me.
From my experience I just learned to watch it like entertainment as I think "whatever came" can only harm me if I buy into what they are selling and make a big case out of it.
At the moment I just want to investigate a little more and see what it was all about, as I am typing this my throat still kinda itches in the spot they were "sipping" stuff outta me :)
Another experience in my life was that I had a dream with my eyes wide open and "learned" why I came here.As I "slid down the tube" to get here some seemingly evil creatures were putting stuff into me something like hate or anger but my general reaction was just to laugh. In that  "dream" I found it to be funny because it was like some monkeys were trying to detour a train (i.e: not find my way back) by throwing bananas at it aka hate, regret , fear and stuff. But that was not my reaction sort of because, back then, I was coming down here and now I am here in this state.
I generally find it amusing and think about what they have 'for sale' :)

 

[David]

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I became depressed about eight years ago, that's when at night I would feel attacked in some way, this went on for some time, I changed my schedule and worked at night, slept during the day with no problems, I reckoned that this is all in my mind that perhaps I know that if I wake up in the day I would be able to see and hence I had nothing to be scared of and my mind couldn't fabricate the illusion, fool myself.
After a few years hit rock bottom and after that took things easy indeed I needed rest, I began to let go & moved back home to family, I had one or two incidents of pestering at night but perhaps I got used to it, as my thinking was more of what is your problem, at one time I heard light footsteps coming over beside my bed, I began to role over and as I did I heard the footsteps scuttle off.
That seemed like the last time, generally I just rested taking stock, taking it easy, I put all this as just a projection from my own mind although most disturbing but I have to think light of it, otherwise I wont be going forward just getting muddled.
My sister came to stay some weeks later for a visit and one night she had a nightmare, she described hearing a shuffling an the carpet & was paralysed as it came closer and she struggled to get the use of her arm to turn on the light, I didn't tell her that I had the same thing happen to me that would scare her, I just made light of it, but I thought my room had timber flooring and I heard footsteps like stepping on the wooden floor and her room was carpeted she heard shuffling, It was as if something was telling me that it was not in my head or maybe just coincidence.
A few weeks later I was dreaming I got out of bed in the same room and there was a dangly type of thing by my window, just sitting there and not very pleasant, In my mind I said you have to go and he took a couple of steps, come on I said pushing him with two fingers of my hand, I thought you have to do the stepping out not me throwing you out, I opened the door and proceeded to tell him to go and pushing him a little, each time he would take about two or three steps and turn to me in a sulky way as if to say I'm not going, I got him as far as the door, then I closed it on him & just went back to bed to sleep where I awoke in the morning.

It was a weird dream, everything was the same except the room seemed a little bigger, It felt good being on the other side & getting that little cranky fellow out, it actually felt tangible, compared to being awake and not being able to do anything.

I think Leopher’s answere "sleep paralysis" is probably just that.

On the other hand perhaps I might end up dying some day and opening up the door to get out only to find a whole bunch of those dangly unpleasant things waiting to attack me, well if I can push one, push all, just have to remember the two finger push or just wave goodbye & sever the connection, hold nothing.