Rejection Lines

[Laura]

My daughter is always sending me funny emails; this is the latest:


Man: Haven't I seen you some place before?
Woman: Yes. That's why I don't go there anymore.

Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not enter.

Man: Can I buy you a drink?
Woman: Actually I'd rather have the money.

Man: How did you get to be so beautiful?
Woman: I must have been given your share.

Man: Your face must turn a few heads.
Woman: And your face must turn a few stomachs.

Man: Go on, don't be shy. Ask me out.
Woman: Okay, get out.

Man: I think I could make you very happy.
Woman: Why? Are you leaving?

Man: What would you say if I asked you to marry me?
Woman: Nothing. I can't talk and laugh at the same time.

Man: Can I have your name?
Woman: Why? Don't you already have one?

Man: Shall we go see a movie?
Woman: I've already seen one.

Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: Hiding from you.

 

[noise]

Had to read that to my wife. That was awesome, almost cramped up from all the laughter. Thank you very much for sharing that Laura('s)/Daughter.

 

[mudrabbit]

One more:

My daughter in law used to have T shirts with sayings very similar. My favorite was this one:

If I throw a stick, will you go away?

 

[Meg]

Pick Up Lines:

* Man: "Haven't we met before?"
Woman: "Yes, I'm the receptionist at the local VD Clinic."

* Man: "So, wanna go back to my place?"
Woman: "Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?"

* Man: "I'd like to call you. What's your number?"
Woman: "It's in the phone book."
Man: "But I don't know your name."
Woman: "That's in the phone book, too."

* Man: "So what do you do for a living?"
Woman: "Female impersonator."
edit, disregard-file sharing error.