The story follows Frances and Lucius' story him an Earl who had promised his ailing grandfather to marry within the year, and she's a school music teacher who is settled in contentment in Bath, they run into each other during a drive in the snow after christmas, spend some time together alone, grow rather fond of one another... spend an intimate night, and they separate.
There's a point in this story where I had trouble following the pace, he leaves but comes back insisting, she sends him away, he tries again, she sends him away, he tries again, she sends him away and at the end she accepts him and they marry one another.
I mean, It isn't quite like that, I do think there's value to the story, she feels ineligible, she's stubbornly attached to that decision she made about it. And maybe the point of the story, as I write these words, was to annoy the reader with Frances' stubborn fixation with being right about being the wrong person for Lucius (though all Lucius does is insist, sometimes invasively, though there could be another way to read that.. but it might be a stretch).
She's like the perfect example of the wrong crystallization of a habit or a belief, so much so that she'll sacrifice love in order to maintain it alive. And this is shown in Lucius own irritation at her, in that sense, I think Mary did a good job showing that when we want to hold on to something, no matter how wrong or how much evidence to the contrary exists, no one is getting in our way, not even ourselves.
It is interesting that the way out of such a stubborn crystallization, was truth, it was sharing, it was Frances finally opening up to Lucius and telling him exactly what she felt about herself and why she had to refuse him. An interesting part of the story takes place here, or at least an interesting concept, which actually appears in a lot of her novels.
Lucius says at some point "you presume to know me so well.. you do that a lot". It struck me while getting through their story that this is exactly what some of these narcissistic programs, or defensive ones, or fears and so on, do in us... convince us of what someone else would do, think or say... and when really thinking about it, that's kind of ridiculous, absurd even.. yet, we do it all the time. I know I do.
Now, Lucius insistence with Frances wasn't my favorite way for these two to end up together, all he had to go on was that he knew, after their one intimate night, that she was a passionate person and so being a teacher wasn't her dream, something she confirms, but it felt like a bit of a stretch to me.
But, there's something that I thought was interesting if one takes that story as an archetypical dynamic inside of Frances.
The story explores several ideas, talent, passion, integrity and naïveté.
Frances was always passionate about singing, however she had been overtly protected by her father while she was growing up, upon his passing, her passion and talent for singing was taken advantage of by predatory individuals due to her naïveté. Despite her innocence, she had enough integrity to walk away from all of it, not let her self be taken advantage of any longer and kill her dreams, freeze her passion and use her talent in some other way, teaching, something honorable but safe... in the running away from life kind of safe.
The trouble that Lucius comes to shed light on was that by her freezing her passion, she was denying her self to herself. There was no way anyone was to know her if she kept on sacrificing her nature. Lucius almost represents her heart, her emotions and the yearning for her true self, and in that sense, his impertinent insistence and inability to take no for an answer, is better understood.
Lucius was Frances' unavoidable truth, the aspect of herself she could never forget or ignore, no matter how long she wished to postpone admitting it to her self, she had to face these emotions, face her own nature and that was Lucius in her life. Their marriage at the end, was a way in which she integrated her nature with her conscious self, her dreams and passion with her knowledge and maturity.
Upon finishing this story, I kept on thinking about Julius Caesar, and his "Stay true to your own nature, and fear nothing" that phrase always struck me as rather interesting, because it's not simply identifying with your drives and dreams and passions, but rather bringing them under your conscious awareness and giving them a role in your life. But that can only be achieved if one does not ignore them, accepts them and nurtures them with knowledge and integrity.
So, perhaps if there's a few take aways from this story, the biggest one would be...stubbornly holding on to a defense mechanism after its useful existence, is annoying, to others at the very least, but to ourselves... it's sacrificing something unnecessarily and at our own peril, like constantly cutting parts of ourselves that naturally grow, just so that we can prove to the world that they were never there in the first place... if that makes sense, like shaving our heads constantly only to be able to say to someone "see? I told you I've always been bald"
And secondly, emotions and passion can be a force for transformation, if nurtured with knowledge and integrity and allowed to mature as we do. As the C's said, some emotions will hold us down and prevent our progress (like the emotional kick from feeling correct about why we need to be right about these silly programs) and there are others who might be what ignites and maintained the engine of transformation running.
It's interesting that for most of us, learning academically and intellectually about any given topic isn't enough, emotionally integrating a story that displays those very same principles tends to stay with us for far longer. So, emotions definitely have a role in our lives, sometimes destructive, sometimes freezing, but potentially transforming and the harbingers of progress.
