Romantic Fiction, Reality Shaping and The Work

I loved the Highlander series as well! I have finally gotten to Balogh's Bedwyn series and can see why it has been so recommended. However - I must say the first book's characters were so annoying! The martyrdom...:rolleyes:. Often, her characters take a bit of time to finally realize their feelings, but these two made me want to throttle them both! :mad:.That said - it was beautiful and I shed a few tears.

As for the tears - I am finding myself much more affected by the stories lately and can understand now why Laura asked us to read so many. Some just don't 'click' for some reason - it's like...yeah that was sweet, but meh. Others just hit you right in the gut. Also - I am beginning to suspect that my heart had been quite well fortified after two unhappy marriages and a few unfortunate relationships. I think the novels are slowly wearing away the fortifications. I hope that's a good thing! At any rate, I have been thoroughly enjoying this reading exercise.
 
After having read the Billionaire series, I had a break reading other things but then came back to the Westcott series which I had saved for after the Billionaire series. It has been like going on vacation to delve into this series as it doesn't disappoint and just is so different from the Billionaire series, though admittedly the focus of the authors were also different.
I felt the same way, it was like a (shock) rigidity. :umm: I can't describe it very well either. I think that might be what Laura meant when she said you have to be careful when you read these novels. I didn't think about it while reading and I didn't feel weird. Also, there was far too much curiosity about what there was to discover. It was kind of like a mini-depression....
I got back into it afterwards with Elisa Braden "Making of a Highlander" and "Taming of a Highlander" and it was difficult to get back into the love stories. Only with real will and perseverance did I manage to get back into the previous feeling. I am now on the second volume of the Mary Balogh web series.

PS: Thank you @Alejo for your great resumes and insights from your readings.
@Alejo I can only agree with Aeneas here. I actually enjoy all your posts. You put things into words so well. Many thanks for that :hug2:
 
Continuing on to conclusion from the 1796 Club series, reported upon here - the connected first book of this four book series, is based upon the Duke of Roseford’s bastards.

In the hundreds of books out there, bastard is a label used often, and it is at the heat of inner traumas.

The first book The Love of a Libertine can be reviewed from the link above. That story was of Morgan and Elisabeth (Morgan the half-brother to Roseford, another bastard son to Roseford’s father).

With the now dead elder Roseford, it is revealed that he had seeded offspring all across the land, truly a predator who did and said what he pleased, originally leaving children with their unwed mothers across London. Both mother and child suffered in each case, so these stories continue, tied as they are through blood to the new Duke, who, with the exception of one of his bastard brother's, cared for them while trying to reach out financially. The new Duke of course, came with his own baggage that did not get unloaded until he had courted and married Kathrine.

Despite the first Duke providing some financial help to his offspring, he rather fit the mold of a psychopath, or a very disturbed character at minimum.

Book two The Heart of a Hellion brings to focus Roseford’s half-sister, Selina, wherein Selina had lived a difficult childhood, essentially raising herself, where it became know that both her mother and step-father really did not want her around.

That is a common condition, osit.

When the first Roseford died (her blood father), Selina's Duke half-brother continued to support her and a number of the bastard brothers sired, as said. His relationship with Selina, however is somewhat frosty, yet there is a thaw, and he and his Duchess wife Katherine then ask Selina to attend a country party. Reluctantly she accepts.

The commonality of these books and so many others, looks to the walls/barriers that the individuals builds in attempt to buffer - insulate their lives, and then the work - the transformations within that helps to break these walls down. This happens is stages, from within, from help of other (new partner, new reflections or words from father, mother, siblings etc.), and influences and words from friends around them.

This is brief, and if not read, read no further, however if read, you will understand that there is casing of the country party taking place for ‘certain’ jewels, by a jewel thief of some renowned. That jewel thief is Selina herself, the mysterious Faceless Fox as is known to society. That the thief is associated as being an unknown male provides more ease for Selina. However, the question of way does she undertake this criminality to begin with is of mind.

So, based on a tip given to two certain investigators (Derrick Huntington and Barber); of which Derrick had happened to have also saved the life of Roseford’s basted brother in war, later featured in book III, the chase was on.

During the plotting phases, Selina, along with her pseudo-chaperone (Vale), undergoes both a powerful attraction and powerful guilt being in her half-brother's home, a gathering of Dukes and Duchesses who begin to see her for who she is, and they very much like her – they warm to her and she to them. That said, the investigators (separately that is) begin to suspect her in steps, and at the same time, Huntington jeopardizes the investigation with his own attraction to Selina. The Faceless Fox herself starts to face her own problems after realizing she is being framed – which spills out for all to see and judge her, especially her own half-brother who has tried to include her in the family.

Among all this, both Huntington and Selina work to free themselves of pent up hidden feelings, to drop the barriers and see the other with new eyes, as their hearts and minds open together. Selina, especially, must reveal everything, and accept her fait that is surly coming.

Not that it was right of her, yet revealed was that Selina had lashed out by stealing jewels from people who slighted, who themselves had stolen the inner jewel of who people are; the titled to their maids, vindictive actions to other ladies - many examples. This is also wrapped up in Selina's own abandonment.

The finality of the story reveals the fraudster (Selina's chaperone/friend) against Selina, the true Faceless Fox thief, both of who were close to each other for the last seven years, and yet never really knew the other.

Vale has some serious problems.

A sacrifice is quickly made, shots are fired, lives salvaged.
 
A small update from my side; I finished Anna Campbell´s Lairds Most Likely series.

I wish I had more developed literary skills so I can better describe books I read, but anyway I found Lairds series a really good written.

The Highlander’s Christmas Lassie novel was the last I´ve read from the series and it touched me on more emotional level than the others. I was deeply touched with Malcom and his never-ending quest to find Rhona.

Each story was engaging and in contrast to Campbell´s Sons of Sin, here the Lairds are very positive and noble characters and more issues were on female characters side. OSIT...

In general, I noticed that I find more and more easily to recognize character´s issues due to parallel reading of psychology recommended books.

Also, I had quite a few deja vu moments when reading the series; is it because of reality blending or why, but I found that very interesting. Also I noticed that strange experiences with Mackenzies & McBrides series, so maybe it is a theme thing? Don´t know...

Next on the list is Mary Balogh´s The Heartless/Silent Melody duo so - bye ´till the next time! :-)
 
And also, I searched how to pronounce mo chridhe and found this gaelic song.
It has such a beautiful melody!

And after Meckenzies and this Lairds, now I’d like to go and visit and see Scotland :love:


Bheir mi o / Gràdh Geal Mo Chridh'

This song tells of a man who has lost his gift for music in his loneliness and longing for the woman he loves, until she said her destiny was with him.

Gràdh Geal Mo Chridh'​

Séist
Bheir mi o hu ho-o
Bheir mi o-o hu o hi
Bheir mi o-hu o-o ho
'S mi fo bhròn 's tu 'gam dhìth
'S iomadh oidhche fhliuch fhuar
Ghabh mi cuairt 's mi leam fhìn
Gus an d'ràinig mise an t-àit'
Far 'n robh gràdh geal mo chridh'
Sèist
Dheanainn treabhadh dheanainn buain
Chumainn suas thu gun strì
'S bheirinn as a' ghreabhal chruaidh
Dha mo luaidh teachd-an-tìr.
Sèist
Ged nach eil sinn fhathast pòsd'
Tha mi 'n dòchas gum bi
Fhad's a mhaireas mo dhà dhòrn
Cha bhi lòn oirnn a dhìth.
Sèist

Fair Love of My Heart​

Chorus:
Bheir mi o hu ho-o
Bheir mi o-o hu o hi
Bheir mi o-hu o-o ho
And sorrowful I am feeling without you
Many's a wet and cold night
I took a walk by myself
Until I'd reach the place
Where was my heart's bright love was
Chorus:
I would plough and reap
I would provide for you without any difficulty
And I would take from the hard gravel
For my love - our livelihood
Chorus:
Although we are not yet married
I hope we shall be
For as long as I have my two hands
We shall not lack food
 
It has such a beautiful melody!
Yes, it sure does. Lovely theme and song.

cont...

Book III of the series continued from here:

This book features the story of Aurora, which also is tied to her friend Imogen, featured in the final book. Book III is titled The Matter of a Marquess (by Jess Michales) telling the story of Roseford’s war damaged bastard son, Nicholas Gillingham – a hero to the realm by all accounts.

Aurora’s husband had died (as did Imogen’s) and she was left by her husband in dire straits, moreover, she was left in worse shape by her dead husbands’ family. Thus, things are precarious, especially when she realizes that her friend, Imogen, has disappeared. Imogen had disappeared after she went looking for a protector in places that cater to men. She knows that her type of old society will not allow her back, on account of her being in even worse financial shape and not knowing what to do.

Aurora follows Imogen’s trail, bringing her to a really low variety establishment (The Cat's Companion), wherein despite her disguise, she is found out, flees and is identified by those in high society. Now she is truly fallen, knowing she cannot recover from this and is in despair. The whispers start circulating about her.

While sitting in her home in worry for herself and her friend, Imogen’s future, the Duchess of Roseford, Katharine, is announced and reluctantly received.

Katharine, the Duchess of Roseford, had once befriended Aurora and considered her a friend, although they had lost touch. Through the whispers campaign that had reached her circles, she arrives to help Aurora, to ask for her side of the story, and thereafter, to ask her to attend a few weeks in the country with close guests to help lighten her load. Katharine also said to Aurora that she would speak to people she knows in the War Department along with her brother in-law, Huntington who is in investigations (see book III with Selina).

Aurora agrees.

When Nicolas was born, the old Duke ensured he and his mother had small means, and through intervention from the wife of the Earl of Bramwell, his Man of Affairs married Nicholas’s mother, and raised him as his son at the estate of Bramwell. The wife also ensure that Nicholas was included with her own children’s education, although an outsider. Bramwell's youngest daughter, happened to be Aurora.

In time, both Nicholas and the slightly younger Aurora took on a tender for each other. This build in time to a point that Nicholas went to the Earl of Bramwell (also a friend of the old Duke Roseford) to ask for her hand. The set-down was cold and calculated, calculated to the point that the Earl had anticipated this and brought Nicholas out to the terrace where he could observe Aurora being escorted by another man of society, later to become her husband. Nicholas fled after being told by Bramwell that his daughter Aurora had no feelings for him, as she wanted to marry the man at her elbow and had even written a letter.

Nicholas goes to war and comes back with a broken body, his heart had also been broken and never healed. It is now nine years later, sitting in a room with his estranged half-brother’s, Roseford, Morgan, and his half-sister Selina, that he is asked to attend this country house gathering where he also reluctantly agrees.

The setting is now established, whereby Aurora arrives at the estate and Nicolas heads out to see who has arrived. Shock, and anger on both sides erupts under this new recognition, coupled with past realization; both want to leave immediately. More than concerned, the families gathered; none knew of Aurora and Nicolas’s old connection, however they convince them both to stay after hearing that there had been this connection.

Make the best of it was agreed.

The rest of the book sees both Aurora and Nicolas’s buried feelings for each other remerge, backstopped by their own individual memories that each did not want the other, and either married in the face of the other, or ran away.

It is learned that Aurora’s marriage was an arranged one, through the manipulation of her father (who even forged letters), while her new husband was seen as completely unfeeling, aloof to her, overall not caring about her at all. It is learned through Nicolas’s reconnection with his half-brother – through the old diaries upon Roseford’s library shelf, that the old Duke had hatched a plan with Bramwell that would see his bastard son leave and go to war. Aurora's father had been more than complicit.

It is also learned that Imogen has been in hiding after she reached out to Aurora and arranged to meet her to explain.

With Nicolas and Aurora’s walls coming down, with their inner feelings being made known, when love between them again blooms, they race off back to London, ending up at a Gentlemen’s Club that is owned by none other than Roseford’s very estranged other half-brother, Oscar Fitzhugh.

As Aurora and Imogen reconnect in the club, suddenly under a rain of gun fire, bullets start ripping the club apart and all hell breaks out. Oscar is wounded and both Oscar and Imogen are taken away by the Duke and Duchess (she is a healer known in The 1797 Club series) who both work as spies for the War Department.

The book ends rather suddenly, leaving threads untied, however the story reconnects in book IV.
 
Book IV is titled The Redemption of a Rogue (again by Jess Michales) that picking up where book III left off here. In this book the character’s move from Aurora and Nicolas, to Imogen and what happened to her in her old and present life. The story also brings in Oscar Fitzhugh, the first and oldest bastard child of the Duke of Roseford, the owner of said club in the review of book III.

In this story, as said in book III, Imogen is searching out for a protector in the worst of the worst places, and as she is about to enter a room, she is scared off by what she knows to be inside and flees, only to emerge through what she thinks as an exit door, and then only to discover below in a court yard, the dead twisted body of a woman. The people around the woman are recognized, one being the Earl of Roddenbury.

In her hast to flee again, she is discovered, recognized, and chased after. Imogen flees through another exit door right into the chest of Oscar Fitzhugh, and there begins the story.

Oscar is the owner of the club discussed above, and it is a club that rivals Whites, catering to members carefully selected for their betterment to society. His partner in the club happens to be Will, the protector of his mother after she had given birth to Roseford’s bastard child, Oscar.

As said above, Oscar was Roseford’s first born, albeit a bastard, so his father hung around him in life up to a certain point until hatred grew on both sides.

Although Imogen had been married, arranged as it was, it was also a lacklustre marriage, nothing bad on the surface, yet after his sudden death she found herself without any means of support, without reference to do other things.

Oscar had earlier met a woman, a courtesan, who he became her protector. Her name was Louisa, and her growing love for Oscar was one day announced to him. Oscar could not face love, and told her he could never love her back, which broke them apart. Thereafter, Oscar had received word that Louisa had fallen into to some untoward people, moreover, that rumour had it that she was dead. Lost with this realization, feeling deep guilt, he searches out for what had happened, for who was responsible, which had brought him to the back door of the Cat’s Companion club when suddenly Imogen runs into his chest.

Clearly, Imogen was in distress, and Oscar hides her, she reluctantly, as she does not know him at all and what he is about. Hidden quickly in his carriage, he then takes her to his home. She argues that she wants to go to her own home and he provides the reality of why that would be a bad idea, and says he will protect her until something can be done.

After hearing Imogen’s story, without judgement, he understands there are connections between what she saw and what perhaps had happened prior to Louisa, and begins his own sleuthing. Unknown to both was that Aurora’s new friend's had also started to investigate Imogen’s disappearance, through the War Department and Huntington’s investigation firm.

As Imogen works out her problems over the weeks in solitude at Oscar’s home, both seek out the other for comfort, for ways to forget the past.

At one-point, Oscar introduces Imogen to his mother (this is pivotal, as he has never taken a woman to meet his mother before), wherein Imogen learns that she too had been a courtesan, and that she can also see the love his mother has for her son, Oscar. She also begins to realizes that Oscar is the bastard of Roseford, who most all knew through reputation. Though subtle talk with his mother, Imogen begins to understand that Oscar has dark demons lurking within his heart and soul, and that each might find ways to help each other.

Oscar makes it clear to Imogen, that he cannot fall in love with her, just as he could not with Louisa, yet he vows to protect her until all is sorted out and she is free again. Through their sharing together, Imogen realizes, like Louisa had done, that she is falling in love. Oscar, too, realizes there are things surfacing that he cannot allow, and works to push those feelings back down.

When the day of the meeting arrives with Aurora that had been agreed to take place at Oscar’s club, this picks up where book III left off, meeting some of his shared blood family and their friends, especially titled ones that he does not trust. After the gunfire erupted, after he had been struck with a bullet, both he and Imogen are taken to a safe house by the Duke and Duchess War Department spies. Oscar's wounds are treated and plans are made, wherein word reaches Imogen that Roddenbury is seeking her out. She agrees to become bait. She knows it all has to end in order for her to get some kind of life back, knowing too that it will not be with Oscar, the man she is falling in love with.

Oscar is not please that Imogen become bait due to the danger, yet yields to Imogen’s wishes. This sets the stage for Roddenbury to show up at Imogen’s own house with her staff replaced by agents of the Crown, with the Duke and Duchess, Oscar, and Huntington and his partner, hiding in adjacent rooms, watching the parlour through drilled peepholes.

Roddenbury, with Maggie, his partner to his crimes in a vast network involved with the trafficking (and murder) of woman, confronts Imogen and demands she leave with him. Imogen needs Roddenbury to implicate himself with words in the crime of murder, which he finally does – guns are drawn, Oscar intervenes, violence takes place and Roddenbury lays dead on the floor.

Love is revealed in full force, as not only do Oscar and Imogen head to Scotland to quickly tie the knot, Oscar's mother and Will, his partner and mother’s old protector, reveal their own love between them and marry, too.

Oscar is reunited with Roseford, along with his other half-brother's, Morgan, Nicolas, and half-sister Selina. Both Imogen and Oscar are welcomed into new families as if they have always belonged.

As these four books are tied to the other series, The Club of 1797, together it is a series involving twenty eight individuals (with many sub characters) who each were fought with inner trauma, confusion, unknown realities never revealed, and people that each helped the other to rediscover themselves, to knit together new bonds for life that they did not know to be possible.

The series ends.
 
A little update from my side. I finished the "Web of love" and the "Devil's web".

The Web of love was a bit angsty. I liked Ellen a lot, she's obviously a courageous woman, but hiding what she hid to Lord Eden was a jerk move. She shows very well what fear and guilt can do to a person. Thanksfully she comes to realise that Lord Eden is a good match for her, and that she can love him without betraying her first husband's memory. That you can love two persons, and there is no need to compare the two, for each is precious and unique.

We also see other characters from the first book such as Madeline, Edmund and Alex and how they are growing. It was nice to witness to the battle of Waterloo, how life was in Brussels before and after the battle.

The Devil's Web is darker than the previous too. I suspected Madeline and James would end up married, but they were so many negative emotions that it's a miracle they managed to pull through. James' sense of worthlessness and Mad's impulsiveness are really an explosive mix. I felt emotionally exhausted just reading them rant at each other, and there is a scene which disturbed me.

Like James, I tend to have difficulty expressing my feelings with enough nuances and that's really something one has to learn. Those books are really good for that😁.
 
I have finished “Bavelstroke series” by Julia Quinn. This series is my favourite. Dialogues, jokes, some funny incidents made me laugh. My mood was very good while and after I was reading this series. I was cheerful, feeling joy, making jokes, deeply feeling my love for my partner, at peace with myself, was more actively in my daily life. These speeches in my mind went away for a while.. I was feeling relieved. As if I was freed from the bonds of somethings. I dont know exactly what was the reason.

But, ( there is always a “but” because there is always ups and downs, I wonder weather I will stabilize ) then, I normally do not watch the news on TV. One of my friend showed me a murder news. A psycho man murdered a woman with a samurai sword. They dont know each other. He just chooses a woman and killed her. And there is another news, a driver hits the gas instead of break and killed a child walking on the sidewalk. I couldnt dare to put myself into this child’s mother. So much pain.

While beggining romantic book work I gave up looking at these kinds of news. Seeing them again made me worried. Think that, we or our children are walking on the road and we dont know if the person behind us is a psychopath. Yeah this World is their farm. Maybe they just push a button and produce the pain. That is so easy for them. This has been happening for thousands of millions of years, I know. And, I undertand the reasons. I read about it so much. But still now I can't help the pain and anxiety inside. I can't convince myself logically not to feel that way. One of my friends said to me that I should stabilize my frequency. I will think about and focus on “stabilization”.
If there is someone living this kind of thing and if you have any other idea, please share with me. I would be appreciated.
 
Hi everyone!

I have just finished Simply Love by Mary Balogh, the second one in the Simply Quartet, and it was a lot more completing than the first book, I found my self being a lot more engaged with this story than with last.

Something I forgot to mention in my previous post is that for those of you who are fans of the Bendwyn saga, the simply quartet follows the story of Freya Bedwyn’s forger governess, if you have read her book, you will remember it being mentioned to a certain degree, Simply Quartet focusses on the story of the school that Freya’s former governess, Mrs. Martin, owns. Freya herself is Mrs. Martin’s secret benefactor.

Having mentioned that, let’s get on to the spoiler section as there’s a few very interesting ideas that occurred to me as I got through this story.

For those of you who loved the Bedwyns, there’s a lot of them in this story, in fact they’re somewhat central to the story, the love match is actually sponsored by them, kind of.

This story follows Anne and Sid, she is Freya’s husband’s (Joshua) cousin, and she is a teacher at Mrs. Martin’s school, much like Frances from the previous story, she has a 9 year old son that was the result of rape, by Joshua’s late brother. Sid is a former soldier who was captured b y french soldiers and tortured, he is missing an eye, and an arm. Sid is also the Duke of Bewcastle’s steward, Bewcastle is Freya’s brother, that’s their connection.

Josue invites Anne to spend some time with them in Wales, where Syd works for the Duke, she agrees as her son has very few male friends or male influences in his life, as she gets there she runs into Syd, after having fled from him, shocked by his injuries, and apologizing. Sid and Anne grow fond of one another, they had a lot in common and since everyone else was paired, they naturally gravitated towards one another.

Their friendship ultimately lead to to trust, which lead them to share and spend an intimate afternoon, Anne becomes pregnant form it and reaches out to Syd who decides to marry her, they navigate several difficulties in their first few weeks of marriage, and the story ends with them finally admitting they love one another after a party full of Bedwyns.

Now, there’s several very interesting ideas that were explored in this story, and I would say that this was one of the books where sex was the most central. But in the form of passionate lovemaking, it was about touch, intimate touch.

Syd is a victim of torture who had to get his arm amputated and does not have one eye, even Anne during their first meeting flees in shock and horror at the sight of him, even though she eventually realizes her mistake and apologizes. He had to endure touch, the kind that destroys and hurts, the kind of touch the traumatizes one to dread any form of touch hence.

Syd feels repulsive and horrific, incomplete and inadequate, unworthy of love and incapable of making someone else happy, as such he longs and craves touch but is afraid of it and so he actively avoids it, specially intimate touch.

He says something rather interesting at some point, that I think describes trauma wonderfully, even if it’s not physical injury, it’s as if his body is stuck in the past to such a degree that it can’t deal with the present.

It made me think of all the symptoms that we experience that may be related to our body responding to older traumatic experiences, or older hurts or wounds. Our bodies register every form of event, and every touch that comes with it, the loving creative ones, the affectionate ones, but also the traumatic ones and these are the ones that are difficult to forget, and overcome.

He lost his right arm, which is the one he used to paint, he loved to paint, which was, interestingly, how he felt he could express his vision of the world. He saw the world in a certain manner, and then had the ability to physically express that through painting, his loss was so great, that even the smell of paint made him nauseous.

Now, interestingly, it’s not that he was a mess, he was actually quite funcional, but complacently incomplete, but not because he was physically incomplete, but because he kept himself so, but refusing to face his past. It wasn’t until he received Anne’s affectionate and accepting touch that he did not start his transformation, that he did not gather the strength to revisit his past and grab whatever he needed from there and leave there whatever he did not need any longer and re invent himself anew.

Anne, had been the victim of rape and she was obviously terrified of intimate touch, she could not bear the sensation, she could not bear feeling intimately touched and this created a lot of confusion for the two of us and it would feed Syd’s fear of being repulsive because of her reactions to him when they were in bed.

it was the touch that brought her right back into the moment when the most tender form of touch became the most destructive. She would freeze and he would blame himself and his own injuries.

Sometimes, fate put us in a specific situation where we find ourselves surrounded by the right kind of people, with the right kind of information to share with us, information that will speak to our inner fears, or traumatic experiences, information that has the potential to heal or make us whole again. But, if we’re not honestly open in these situations, if we’re not at least partially aware of how our own experiences can determine our behavior, we may validate both ours and their programs.

It struck me that we either make one another strong or weak unintentionally and unconsciously depending on our level of awareness. There are some of us for whom helping someone else is second nature, and I think responding to a request for help is key, but that should go along with a certain amount of internal work, and that is probably the other half of helping someone be strong.

The idea of attractiveness is also explored in this story, they actually both felt repulsive, for different reasons. Anne felt dirty and Syd knew he caused horror in others. But it’s not just being physically attractive to strangers, it’s being found worthy of attention and affection, worthy of touch, loving and creative touch.

Our skin is the first level of defense of our beings to the outside world, it’s the one organ that we will cover or reveal to show our trust, it’s the one organ that will visually display our wounds, sickness, habits and life in general. It’s in our wrinkles that people can tell whether we smile a lot or frown too much, etc.

It’s so crucial, yet so fragile and easy to break and cut, but also it’s so effective at transmitting a lot of unspoken words to the rest of our beings. Syd was tortured and as such he felt he had lost his way to give himself to the world, Anne was raped and as such, she felt unworthy of love and affection, and afraid of intimacy. But, it wasn’t until Anne touched Syd and told him he was beautiful, and after she opened up to him about what touch meant that they could not rewrite the information that their skin had imprinted in their lives.

I know it’s a long post already, and perhaps it may be better described this way. This book was the story of how intimate touch can be utterly destructive, and we have all been there in one way or another, but it is through the same avenue that we may regain our lives back by rewriting wha all those awful touches imprinted on our skins, digging to our very souls in some instances.


Thanks for reading everyone! Now, onto Simply Magic
 
I finished the two first books of the Bridgetown series by Mrs Julia Quinn. These books are infinitly better than the Netflix series. The stories are short but well told and there's a lot of humour in it! The Bridgetown family is kind of an ideal family, where everybody is loved and cared for. Which made me wonder what a wonderful world we would have if all children were cherished and raised to develop their talents and true selves.

Those stories help me to find a balance with all the doom and gloom around us. They make me feel more connected with my fellow humans, even if I don't see the world like they do. (I pass for a weirdo anyway😅). I also feel more present, I can more and more see the predatory mind in me, I manage to simply BE with my emotions without being engulfed by them with more regularity. I feel like I am growing inside, and all I hope is that I will know what it is to BE human before I leave this life.

Humanity is crossing the valley of shadows at the moment, so these last months, I've started to pray again with more regularity for a better future, but also to my ancestors, to thank them to have come before me, to have endured all those hardships, humiliations and horrors, so that my soul could come in the body I carry. I've never felt so much gratitude for the simple fact that I am alive. I pray those of them who tried to walk at the side of God, even if I don't know them and ask them for help in these times. (I also pray to J.C. and Paul, they're not my ancestors but we need all the help we can get!)

These stories helped me see that I am part of a greater whole, that I am a member of a long lign of individuals, peoples and cultures. I understood it intellectually before - thanks to the books of Mircea Eliade, Mary Stettergast, the secret History of the world series and more - but know I feel it. I feel more grounded and I understand better what it means to have your roots in a place or a people. And how that doesn't contradict the fact that you can also have a "soul family".
 
Book IV is titled The Redemption of a Rogue (again by Jess Michales) that picking up where book III left off here. In this book the character’s move from Aurora and Nicolas, to Imogen and what happened to her in her old and present life. The story also brings in Oscar Fitzhugh, the first and oldest bastard child of the Duke of Roseford, the owner of said club in the review of book III.
I added the following to the list( and all forms are updated)

303Jess MichaelsThe Duke’s By-Blows1The Love of a Libertine
304Jess MichaelsThe Duke’s By-Blows2The Heart of a Hellion
305Jess MichaelsThe Duke’s By-Blows3The Matter of a Marquess
306Jess MichaelsThe Duke’s By-Blows4The Redemption of a Rogue
 
I have finished “Bavelstroke series” by Julia Quinn. This series is my favourite. Dialogues, jokes, some funny incidents made me laugh. My mood was very good while and after I was reading this series. I was cheerful, feeling joy, making jokes, deeply feeling my love for my partner, at peace with myself, was more actively in my daily life. These speeches in my mind went away for a while.. I was feeling relieved. As if I was freed from the bonds of somethings. I dont know exactly what was the reason.

But, ( there is always a “but” because there is always ups and downs, I wonder weather I will stabilize ) then, I normally do not watch the news on TV. One of my friend showed me a murder news. A psycho man murdered a woman with a samurai sword. They dont know each other. He just chooses a woman and killed her. And there is another news, a driver hits the gas instead of break and killed a child walking on the sidewalk. I couldnt dare to put myself into this child’s mother. So much pain.

While beggining romantic book work I gave up looking at these kinds of news. Seeing them again made me worried. Think that, we or our children are walking on the road and we dont know if the person behind us is a psychopath. Yeah this World is their farm. Maybe they just push a button and produce the pain. That is so easy for them. This has been happening for thousands of millions of years, I know. And, I undertand the reasons. I read about it so much. But still now I can't help the pain and anxiety inside. I can't convince myself logically not to feel that way. One of my friends said to me that I should stabilize my frequency. I will think about and focus on “stabilization”.
If there is someone living this kind of thing and if you have any other idea, please share with me. I would be appreciated.
I hear you motherofrsd,
It’s hard going out there right now. Thank you for your recommendation of this series I’ll add that to my books to read soon.

The only suggestion I can make is breathe and love. I’ve just remembered this morning to actually hug and nurture myself, not expect some one else to have to do it. I mean I visualise the energy of a loving hug and give it to myself.
 
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