10 step guide for making your new self

[Starshine]

Thanks everyone, very important and helpful indeed.
I liked very much the quote of this other thread :

Replacing 'years resolutions' with 'self' - I thought this article contains some useful tips relevant to 'the work' http://www.sott.net/article/255758-10-Step-Guide-for-Making-Your-New-Years-Resolutions.

Some that stood out for me:

1. For big results, think small

The classic mistake people make when choosing their New Year's resolutions is to bite off more than they can chew. Even with the help of psychologists, people find it hard to make relatively modest changes. So pick something you have a reasonable chance of achieving. You can always run the process again for another habit once the first is running smoothly.

Equates to Gurdjieff's 'small tasks' discussed here: What are the "small" tasks you have in the Work?

Q: How can we gain attention?

A: There is no attention in people. You must aim to acquire this. Self-observation is only possible after acquiring attention. Start on small things.

Q: What small things can we start on? What should we do?

A: Your nervous and restless movements make everyone know, consciously or unconsciously, that you have no authority and are a booby. With these restless movements you cannot be anything. The first thing for you to do is to stop these movements. Make this your aim, your God. Even get your family to help you. Only after this, you can perhaps gain attention. This is an example of doing.
Another example - an aspiring pianist can never learn except little by little. If you wish to play melodies without first practicing, you can never play real melodies. The melodies you will play will be cacophonous and will make people suffer and hate you. It is the same with psychological ideas: to gain anything, long practice is necessary.
Try to accomplish very small things first. If at first you aim at big things you will never be anything. And your manifestations will act like cacophonous melodies and cause people to hate you.

Q: What must I do?

A: There are two kinds of doing - automatic doing, and doing according to aim. Take a small thing which you now are not able to do, and make this your aim, your God. Let nothing interfere. Only aim at this. Then, if you succeed in doing this, I will be able to give you a greater task. Now you have an appetite to do things too big for you. This is an abnormal appetite. You can never do these things, and this appetite keeps you from doing the small things that you might do. Destroy this appetite, forget big things. make the breaking of a small habit your aim.

Q: I think my worst fault is talking too much. Would trying not to talk so much be a good task?

A: For you this is a very good aim. You spoil everything with your talking. This talk even hinders your business. When you talk much, your words have no weight. Try to overcome this. Many blessings will flow to you if you succeed. Truly, this is a very good task. But it is a big thing, not small. I promise you, if you achieve this, even if I am not here, I will know about your achievement, and will send help so that you will know what to do next.

Q: Would a good task be to endure the manifestations of others?

A: To endure the manifestations of others is a big thing. The last thing for a man. Only a perfect man can do this. Start by making your aim or your God the ability to bear one manifestation of one person that you cannot now endure without nervousness. If you "wish," you "can." Without "wishing," you never "can." Wish is the most powerful thing in the world. With conscious wish everything comes.

Q: I frequently remember my aim but I have not the energy to do what I feel I should do.

A: Man has no energy to fulfill voluntary aims because all his strength, acquired at night during his passive state, is used up in negative manifestations. These are his automatic manifestations, the opposite of his positive, willed manifestations.
For those of you who are already able to remember your aim automatically, but have no strength to do it: sit for a period of at least one hour alone. Make all your muscles relaxed. Allow your associations to proceed but do not be absorbed by them. Say to them: "If you will let me do as I wish now, I shall later grant you your wishes." Look on you associations as though they belonged to someone else, to keep yourself from identifying with them.
At the end of an hour take a piece of paper and write your aim on it. Make this paper your God. Everything else is nothing. Take it out of your pocket and read it constantly, every day. In this way it becomes part of you, at first theoretically, later actually. To gain energy, practice this exercise of sitting still and making your muscles dead. Only when everything in you is quiet after an hour, make your decision about your aim. Don't let associations absorb you. To undertake a voluntary aim, and to achieve it, gives magnetism and the ability to "do."

I will do that.
About big things to do, this has been the best way to tell myself not to start doing things. A beautiful excuse flirting with wanting all to be perfect (inner-considering), and well, stopping me from even beginning a new activity. Some programs that has been anchored by my father when I was young : you're good-for-nothing + comparison with others. I really believed it for a long time.
The process has to be done step by step, why are we even thinking about the top, when we just have to look in front of us !

 

[SMM]

It is when you think that there is nothing more left of yourself, that you will find what lies at the bottom of your soul. And some will find nothing, and some will find an entire universe. :)

Well put.

In fact all the points you mentioned Therpo I found relevant :)

 

[SMM]

I know I've not long posted however merely now realise how appropriate a lot of what's mentioned on this thread is for me presently.

An aim for myself this year is relatively small compared to some of the others in the past...if the time scale is omitted. Maybe that's getting more 'realistic' with age? I've got a bit of a mental block with words, not sure how much is getting through on this, but the doing according to aim I tried - felt like someone else.

Recent strange experiences have sort of displaced that, dragging thoughts/emotional complexes into the gutter & it's kind of like regressing to old conditioned habits & programmed responses as you're not as aware of aim - or it becomes harder to remain as persistent.

Think it'd be worth me reading through ISOTM again. I used to bite my nails compulsively - I remember reading it had something to do with me becoming conscious of the habit/my hands & stopping
Didn't realise at the time it was a small task.

Thanks everyone, very important and helpful indeed.
I liked very much the quote of this other thread :

Replacing 'years resolutions' with 'self' - I thought this article contains some useful tips relevant to 'the work' http://www.sott.net/article/255758-10-Step-Guide-for-Making-Your-New-Years-Resolutions.

Some that stood out for me:

1. For big results, think small

The classic mistake people make when choosing their New Year's resolutions is to bite off more than they can chew. Even with the help of psychologists, people find it hard to make relatively modest changes. So pick something you have a reasonable chance of achieving. You can always run the process again for another habit once the first is running smoothly.

Equates to Gurdjieff's 'small tasks' discussed here: What are the "small" tasks you have in the Work?

Q: How can we gain attention?

A: There is no attention in people. You must aim to acquire this. Self-observation is only possible after acquiring attention. Start on small things.

Q: What small things can we start on? What should we do?

A: Your nervous and restless movements make everyone know, consciously or unconsciously, that you have no authority and are a booby. With these restless movements you cannot be anything. The first thing for you to do is to stop these movements. Make this your aim, your God. Even get your family to help you. Only after this, you can perhaps gain attention. This is an example of doing.
Another example - an aspiring pianist can never learn except little by little. If you wish to play melodies without first practicing, you can never play real melodies. The melodies you will play will be cacophonous and will make people suffer and hate you. It is the same with psychological ideas: to gain anything, long practice is necessary.
Try to accomplish very small things first. If at first you aim at big things you will never be anything. And your manifestations will act like cacophonous melodies and cause people to hate you.

Q: What must I do?

A: There are two kinds of doing - automatic doing, and doing according to aim. Take a small thing which you now are not able to do, and make this your aim, your God. Let nothing interfere. Only aim at this. Then, if you succeed in doing this, I will be able to give you a greater task. Now you have an appetite to do things too big for you. This is an abnormal appetite. You can never do these things, and this appetite keeps you from doing the small things that you might do. Destroy this appetite, forget big things. make the breaking of a small habit your aim.

Q: I think my worst fault is talking too much. Would trying not to talk so much be a good task?

A: For you this is a very good aim. You spoil everything with your talking. This talk even hinders your business. When you talk much, your words have no weight. Try to overcome this. Many blessings will flow to you if you succeed. Truly, this is a very good task. But it is a big thing, not small. I promise you, if you achieve this, even if I am not here, I will know about your achievement, and will send help so that you will know what to do next.

Q: Would a good task be to endure the manifestations of others?

A: To endure the manifestations of others is a big thing. The last thing for a man. Only a perfect man can do this. Start by making your aim or your God the ability to bear one manifestation of one person that you cannot now endure without nervousness. If you "wish," you "can." Without "wishing," you never "can." Wish is the most powerful thing in the world. With conscious wish everything comes.

Q: I frequently remember my aim but I have not the energy to do what I feel I should do.

A: Man has no energy to fulfill voluntary aims because all his strength, acquired at night during his passive state, is used up in negative manifestations. These are his automatic manifestations, the opposite of his positive, willed manifestations.
For those of you who are already able to remember your aim automatically, but have no strength to do it: sit for a period of at least one hour alone. Make all your muscles relaxed. Allow your associations to proceed but do not be absorbed by them. Say to them: "If you will let me do as I wish now, I shall later grant you your wishes." Look on you associations as though they belonged to someone else, to keep yourself from identifying with them.
At the end of an hour take a piece of paper and write your aim on it. Make this paper your God. Everything else is nothing. Take it out of your pocket and read it constantly, every day. In this way it becomes part of you, at first theoretically, later actually. To gain energy, practice this exercise of sitting still and making your muscles dead. Only when everything in you is quiet after an hour, make your decision about your aim. Don't let associations absorb you. To undertake a voluntary aim, and to achieve it, gives magnetism and the ability to "do."

I will do that.
About big things to do, this has been the best way to tell myself not to start doing things. A beautiful excuse flirting with wanting all to be perfect (inner-considering), and well, stopping me from even beginning a new activity. Some programs that has been anchored by my father when I was young : you're good-for-nothing + comparison with others. I really believed it for a long time.
The process has to be done step by step, why are we even thinking about the top, when we just have to look in front of us !

Having just come out of a strange series of experience(s) pertinent to sex/relationships [with the opposite gender..?] which activated many little I's in myself, leaving me with more questions than answers & a possible psychic attack to begin with though patience was of paramount assistance, sparing the details, these or something feels in order.

This experience aided to me to see how consciously changing simple things in us embraces a lot. Working on cultivating discipline - reorganizing too, still sensing some drudgery I guess :P External considerations as well, my lens' have redirected.

Interesting exercise, will try it also - after said experience, I frequently remember my aim but I have not the energy to do what I feel I should do. As for the psychic attack aspect, I recall the C's saying that getting back to stable, normal functioning was what was required. Trying to fetch the quote, little luck.

If any of what I've mentioned is irrelevant, a head's up is much appreciated :)
All the varied inputs here are insightful, thank you all.

A step-by-step process

 

[anka]

Thanks for this thread and your comments.

It brings me to one more thing, not yet mentioned here. The mind work in my case needs to be strongly supported by physical exercise, like those warm-up stretches one is to do before EE. I had to start with practices like that some years ago (sometimes call it home-made yoga) in order not only to feel the body alive but also to wake up in the moment and boost my presence in NOW otherwise it has always been too easy to lose my focus along with energy and to stay asleep and daydream.

Number of times a day, even before little events like lighting up a cigarette, going to pick up something, making a phone call etc... those exercises always help me to come together to be aware that i am indeed working on something continuously and i am trying to accomplish something (unlearning a habit, changing attitude...).

For many people (for most if not all) it is necessary to work on one's self on all the levels otherwise there can be no talk of hope about potentially mastering one's mind.