21 powerful questions: gain clarity on who you are, what you should do

Luks

The Living Force
FOTCM Member
From what I see, those questions (with adequate commitment) can touch deep parts of the subconscious to draw the answers.

This what I can add is that important is genetic. Genetic is like the hardware in computer. For example, we have the two computers, one with very good graphics and mid processor and other without any specific graphic card but powerful processor.

If we would like to run video game the first one is better, but for engineer and his work the second computer would be better.

And those 21 questions are helpful to find proper software, but it is important to check whether it can be run on the computer with its specific hardware configuration.

I think the most important is, but it mainly is in hands of the parents, to as fast as it possible to find genetic predispositions to different proffesions. For those whose parents weren't conscious of it, they should on their own measure their genetic profile and find core personality features and capabilities.

And after that use something like "21 powerful questions" what can be very valuable.

My two cents.
 

Dakota

Jedi Council Member
FOTCM Member
Beau said:
Another thing to keep in mind is that, if you don't post because you feel like what you say won't be useful, you'll never actually get any feedback that what you wrote is or isn't useful! It's a catch-22. The best way to know if you're posting "noise" is to post. But the key is like you say, get over your self-importance, which can talk us into not saying anything over saying something and getting feedback that could be critical. Without constructive criticism, how do we fix our machine? We don't, but it's interesting how our false self can do all it can to maintain control and keep us from doing that which can advance us mentally, emotionally and spiritually.

:) I think that I'm going to try this catch-22 and see what will happen. Thank beau, that was great advice. :cool2:
 

Ant22

Ambassador
Ambassador
FOTCM Member
Dakota said:
Beau said:
Another thing to keep in mind is that, if you don't post because you feel like what you say won't be useful, you'll never actually get any feedback that what you wrote is or isn't useful! It's a catch-22. The best way to know if you're posting "noise" is to post. But the key is like you say, get over your self-importance, which can talk us into not saying anything over saying something and getting feedback that could be critical. Without constructive criticism, how do we fix our machine? We don't, but it's interesting how our false self can do all it can to maintain control and keep us from doing that which can advance us mentally, emotionally and spiritually.

:) I think that I'm going to try this catch-22 and see what will happen. Thank beau, that was great advice. :cool2:

I second that Dakota, thank you for your input Beau! :)
 

petite femme

Padawan Learner
Wow, these are great! In looking at them, I realize, I don't really think about myself very much! I find myself just moving through life, doing the next right thing and so on.Don't get me wrong, I self observe and work on myself, but mostly it is the negative aspects of myself that seem to get most of the attention! Do you know what I mean?
It is quite a realization, to contemplate! I haven't even started to try to answer them yet and they have provoked much thought and reflection! Thanks for this wonderful post!
 

Konstantin

Ambassador
Ambassador
FOTCM Member
I finished answering those 21 questions. It was not easy for me . It also not easy to post them here, because i think its too personal, but sometimes speaking about those personal stuff can actually help.
Maybe some answers will be a slightly different if I answered them in some different time, but right now i tried to answer those questions as much objective as i could.

Here are they:

1. You’re on your deathbed looking back on your life. What did you like best about it?
I like the time i spent with my son. I like the time i have spent with my wife.
I like summers when i was a child, playing in the park with my friends.I like the moments when i was outside, in the nature, in the mountains. I also like when I Am able to help someone. It is a pleasure to me to help somebody. I also like the smell of the old books, it reminds me of my childhood.

2. What is the one problem you were born to understand?
Probably one of them is a relationship with my mother. We can't get along. I have problem understanding her behaviour. Pathological lying and twisting the facts.Believing her own lies and living in her own world.
I don't know if this is my problem that i have to understand in this life, but it is one of them.
Another thing that is a problem, is my inability to say no when i should say it. Especially at work.Somehow i learned to say it in some occasions but it's not enough. I tend not to express my emotions and my fears and it is not good. I must express them more.I often don't know what to say when i find myself in a situation when i have to express some emotions.On some weird way I am ashamed of my emotions. I think it's due to programing in my childhood by my parents.

3. If you had only three wishes, what powers, possessions or qualities would you wish for?

- I wish I finished the university and have some university diploma. It will make me easier find a better job and maybe that will help me buy my own house so i won't live in my parents apartment anymore.Right now with my current financial situation i don't have other choice
- I wish I had more normal and functional family while I was child or a teenager or later when I grow up and have a better emotional connection with my parents.
- I wish I don't have to work for others anymore. I wish i could have my own business. It will be less stressful and I’ll probably have more time to spent with my family, or at least find a better job.


4. If you were granted three life mentors, who would they be and why?
Without much thinking first one will be Laura. I admire her work, and her work was and still is the only thing that showed me the right way, the light in all this dark times.
Another one maybe will be Gurdjijev.


5. If you had one hour of prime time TV to address the world, what would you do?
I would tell them to be more aware. I’ll tell them not to believe everything they see, they hear or read. That our reality is full of lies and believing in them is not a wise choice. I’ll tell them not to fear. Fear is blocking emotion and we must learn not to fear about what we want or what we think. I`ll tell them to research and to question everything and to not take anything for granted. I’ll tell the world not to divide, but to unite as a human species and fight against psychopaths and their supporters. I’ll tell the world that religion is just a smart tool, smart manipulation to divide humanity and make them believe in lies and myths in order to rule with them

6. If you had an opportunity to teach every child one life lesson, what would it be?
Open your eyes. Educate yourself. Every kind of knowledge makes you greater.Knowledge protects and ignorance endangers. I will teach every single child about basic rules in universe, about densities, and about multi-density nature of the universe and that the universe is not what their religion is telling them or what today pseudoscience promotes. I’ll tell them about psychopaths and how to protect from them. I’ll teach them to be empathic human beings and not a automated machines and to work on themselves to be a consciousness as much as possible.

7. If you knew with certainty that you would not fail at doing this, what would it be?
I dont quite understand this question but i’ll try to give some answer.My main goal is to know the truth and work on myself. TO free myself from my own programs and daemons.By doing this i can help others who are on the same path as I am.

8. What is the single most important thing missing from your life right now?
I miss the feeling of being free. I don't feel free but i want to. I miss that from my life. Right now I feel like I’m a slave. Stuck at my current job and just waiting to get free and go on with my life. Going to work and doing the job that I hate, just to survive. I think that this is one of the main reasons that I feel like that.

9. If you could predict the next big choice your life would present you, what would it be?
Maybe the opportunity to have a better job.Or maybe this is not a prediction only my expectation.

10. What would be your single greatest regret if you died tomorrow?
I think that my greatest regret will be that i don't spent more time with my family, not expressing my emotions toward them more. That i was limiting myself by my own fears, instead to be a man of action and take a risk and do what has to be done.That i spent my best years just working something that i dont like just to survive from one month to another.

11. What is the “unlived life” of each of your parents and what effect has it had on your life?
Both of my parent grow without their parents in their childhood. Having a functional family as a kids is probably my parents “unlived life”.
Effects are that i had to grow in weird nonfunctional family. With an alcoholic father and mother who lives in her own world , lying and hiding things even from herself and thinking that everybody is laughing at her or trying to hurt her, which is probably due her programming in her childhood.

12. What are your top three talents?
Every job that i start i want it to be done as best as possible.
I have a talent with technical stuff and I like to build and repair things.


13. When were you the happiest and what were you up to?
I dont know when I was happiest but i remember the moments when I was really happy. One of that moments is when my son was born.
Last time it was a month ago when I and my son surprised my wife with a present for our anniversary.

14. What is your most memorable break with tradition or taboo, and what were you after?
- Speaking in front of my friends in one occasion that Jesus is just a myth and that the whole christianity religion is based just on myth. They saw me at that moment as the biggest traitor, but I’m ok with that. In general a realisation that all those monotheistic religions are just one big lie, a story and nothing more.
- Saying that bread and milk are not good to be consumed is breaking of another taboo in my country and in my close environment.

15. What do you want to be remembered for after you die?
That i was an honest man. I dont know. Maybe i dont want to be remembered.Why would I like that. What can i get from that , or what others can get from remembering me ?

16. What have you rejected that seems determined to claim you?
- My pessimism and not having faith in myself.Always starting with so much expectation and at the end finishing with pessimism and disappointment.
Whatever I start it is “cursed” to fail.
- My fear to take the action , to take the risk sometimes and just do something.

17. If you could choose one friend to trade careers with who would it be?
With few of my friends who don't work for others and have their own businesses

18. If you had to go back to college tomorrow what classes would you take?
Probably medicine or some technical course connected with computers and electronics.

19. What is the most consistent message; impulse or prompting you’ve been getting about following a departure from the status quo in your work life?
I dont really understand this question but I’ll try to answer it.I think that you have to ask for a better change.You have to start do something in order to change the status quo. That you have to do the job the best you can and not to expect to see some real benefits very quickly , but they will come if you are doing the job as best as you can.

20. What do you love most about your current job?
That I always get my salary in time.

21. When was the last time you were in a state of flow, in the zone and totally lost track of time? What were you doing?
Reading a book, few days ago.
 

Dakota

Jedi Council Member
FOTCM Member
Konstantin, you just made my day full of joy. Thank you for that.

I think that you done amazing job answering those question in clearly the most honest way you can, also, posting this you gave me opportunity to do the same.

It is amazing how is different feeling when you do this on your own and totally different when you show this to the others. Like we are connecting to others when we talk about ourselves.

1. You're on your deathbed looking back on your life. What did you like best about it?
I really like my life. My experiences are like a treasure to me. I can talk about it but nobody will really understand. For them that will be just words, for me it is so alive and vivid. And I have lived what I wanted even most of this experience was against the 'things you have to do in your life'.
Also, I have quit my job in public service because everything there was fault and exhausting especially for my health.
All my life I was searching something to fullfill my feeling of emptiness. Most of the people stop searching, I didn't till I found that knowledge is the answer. I feel joy when I found something new.
When I was 10 years old, I was falling in love with two persons, girl and boy, because I have two persons in me. I been this life with two strong personalities and that didn't make me crazy, and I have learn to live even sometimes that was very confusing for me.

2. What is the one problem you were born to understand?
First of all, my division. What was I thinking when I planned to come on this world to learn my lessons?! When this happend, am I born with this or something happend in my childhood that made me split.
How my machine is working is another issue. Also, the world. Who created this world? Sometime I catch moment of understanding why, but I really wanna 'go inside of the head creator of everything' and understand. I want to know everything, how is working and what is purpose.

3. If you had only three wishes, what powers, possessions or qualities would you wish for?
I want to know everything.
I want to have continuity in my learning.
I want to be excellent empath.
I want achieve much more peace through knowledge.
I know, so much 'i want'. This is like my annoying cat Tommy when he comes home from his adventures ;).

4. If you were granted three life mentors, who would they be and why?
Off course, Laura. She made a great standards and I really like standards.
Second, my best friend Earwen. She is like a 'google' to me. Knows so much stuff and have a excellent way to pass her knowledge to others.
And last is just knowledge that gives me opportunity to put together puzzles.

5. If you had one hour of prime time TV to address the world, what would you do?
Knowledge and cooperation. There is no another way to progress and find meaning of things you do without this two things. If you wanna found out what is real joy, help when someone ask you and learn when you don't know.

6. If you had an opportunity to teach every child one life lesson, what would it be?
Same as above.

7. If you knew with certainty that you would not fail at doing this, what would it be?
I had trouble to understand this question also, and I'll try to answer. Even sometimes I fall in meaningless phase, I'm certain that in this life I have achieve to connect knowledge and practical life. What sometimes think that I didn't achieve in past lifes.

8. What is the single most important thing missing from your life right now?
Continuity and self-control.

9. If you could predict the next big choice your life would present you, what would it be?
Sometime I think that because of my need to implement every new information in my life I'm to slow in learning.

10. What would be your single greatest regret if you died tomorrow?
That I didn't acomplish to be really good in something. So many things in life in which I was very good, but always something is missing in my act to achieve to be excellent.

11. What is the “unlived life” of each of your parents and what effect has it had on your life?
That one I think that I nailed it. My mother was full in love story, sad story. She was always searching for love and she never understood what means relationship and loving someone. I have still to much to learn but now I feel peace about this.
Also, my father was fanatic for god, religion and meaning of life. He is pretty much stuck in his own false fantasies. I think that I have much much better understanding than he. Even, I should probably be thankfull because he implemented in me this desire to searching for meaning of life.

12. What are your top three talents?
[Childish] Desire to know.
Calm in dangerous or tense situation.
Good in implementing knowledge in practical life (and not just mine).

13. When were you the happiest and what were you up to?
When I'm constructive and have a feeling that I can contribute to something/someone.
When I opened my own catering.
On my new job.
In some romantic moments.
When I'm with my new family because we laugh most of the time.

14. What is your most memorable break with tradition or taboo, and what were you after?
Breaking the trap to work every day eight hours.
Living on my terms.
Stop eating bread and grains.
Stop drinking carbonated drinks.

15. What do you want to be remembered for after you die?
That is ok to die and that is not so smart to be sad because of my death. ;) Also, I find very annoying funerals and I hope that people will not making a big thing regarding this. Live and die, and then again. Relax.

16. What have you rejected that seems determined to claim you?
I don't get it this question.

17. If you could choose one friend to trade careers with who would it be?
Earwen worked on the cruisers, sometimes I'm so sad that I didn't meet her before, because I know that I could become very skilled cook if I had opportunity to work on cruiser. I know that is absurdly to be think what could be...but, sometime I couldn't helped my self.

18. If you had to go back to college tomorrow what classes would you take?
Everything! Hahaha! Probably quantum physics.

19. What is the most consistent message; impulse or prompting you’ve been getting about following a departure from the status quo in your work life?
I always feel like a missing something important to reach my goal. Not enough this or that.

20. What do you love most about your current job?
Great salary!
Working only in the summer, enjoying rest of the year.
Great window with a view on the sea.
Good owner, gives you opportunity to do your job the best you can.
Opportunity for progress.
Freedom to relax when you need too.

21. When was the last time you were in a state of flow, in the zone and totally lost track of time? What were you doing?
Playing video games. :-[
Also, maybe the biggest problem in my head is that I'm still so much restless, especially when I feel a lot of energy in my self. Like a lack of capability to focus my energy to learn something. Also, I live in two phases, one is fanatic desire to learn and another one is inertial phase of don't have a energy to do something.
 

PerfectCircle

Jedi Master
I decided to post mine here as well, after some of you did the same.
I think I was pretty honest and am curious to check these again in 2-3 years.

1. You’re on your deathbed looking back on your life. What did you like best about it?
That I managed to catch a glimpse of awakening in this strange world.

2. What is the one problem you were born to understand?
Human behaviour in modern age and the difficulties of honest conversations.

3. If you had only three wishes, what powers, possessions or qualities would you wish for?
Total control of my emotional-mental centres, craftmanship&engineering, mind reading.

4. If you were granted three life mentors, who would they be and why?
Jesus, Budha, Gurdjijeff.

5. If you had one hour of prime time TV to address the world, what would you do?
I would never do those things on TV, but hypotethically.. trying to explain the cons of advanced technology, especially if it is ahead of moral/spiritual levels.

6. If you had an opportunity to teach every child one life lesson, what would it be?
Never allow others to tell you what to do if you hadn't asked for it and never tell anyone what to do if he didn't ask for it.

7. If you knew with certainty that you would not fail at doing this, what would it be?
Contact/channel STO higher beings.

8. What is the single most important thing missing from your life right now?
Total control of my emotional/mental centers.

9. If you could predict the next big choice your life would present you, what would it be?
Getting good job with as little stress as possible.

10. What would be your single greatest regret if you died tomorrow?
That I failed my previously set up objectives for this life.

11. What is the “unlived life” of each of your parents and what effect has it had on your life?
Father's to live steadily in one place since he went abroad many times because of his job. Mother's probably the opposite since she hasn't travelled much at all.
This actually hasn't had any impact on my life. They haven't even talked to me about those things and I was the one to compile and decide all of my major choices in my life.

12. What are your top three talents?
Listening to people's problems, organizing/sorting, sometimes accurately intuitive.
There aren't many, I don't consider myself to be especially talented at anythiing.

13. When were you the happiest and what were you up to?
When I was a kid thinking life and our world is based on goodness and everything is done for the sake of everybody. I was up to living happily in it and try to find my

place that fits it the best.

14. What is your most memorable break with tradition or taboo, and what were you after?
Nothing too memorable, more like smaller things/situations.
For example.. not caring if I wear things or look like it is preferrable for a specific situatio; or like giving opinions on things which are considered weird/taboo.

15. What do you want to be remembered for after you die?
For my individuality and sense of humour altough I don't have the wish to be widely remembered.

16. What have you rejected that seems determined to claim you?
Doing job which involves strong relations with people and high energy usage.

17. If you could choose one friend to trade careers with who would it be?
It is prone to changing, but anyone who is a programmer.

18. If you had to go back to college tomorrow what classes would you take?
Programming/software developing.

19. What is the most consistent message; impulse or prompting you’ve been getting about following a departure from the status quo in your work life?
Whether I should take a risk and invest all of my (modest amount) money into private business.

20. What do you love most about your current job?
Money.

21. When was the last time you were in a state of flow, in the zone and totally lost track of time? What were you doing?
Watching Youtube videos I think.
 

Nico

Jedi Council Member
Konstantin said:
8. What is the single most important thing missing from your life right now?
I miss the feeling of being free. I don't feel free but i want to. I miss that from my life. Right now I feel like I’m a slave. Stuck at my current job and just waiting to get free and go on with my life. Going to work and doing the job that I hate, just to survive. I think that this is one of the main reasons that I feel like that.

I can totally relate with this one Konstantin, you might be interested to read my view on this particular topic here. The answers from others were really an help, and remember stuckness/fear is just a feeling, recognize that you have it and let it go. I have done that all day at my work, now I feel freer and ready to move, or at least take action toward change. I think you have to feel free or a a little freer about your current job before changing, otherwise you may repeat the same pattern of stuckness and fear.

PerfectCircle said:
17. If you could choose one friend to trade careers with who would it be?
It is prone to changing, but anyone who is a programmer.

18. If you had to go back to college tomorrow what classes would you take?
Programming/software developing.

I am a programmer, and if you want to change I'm ready ! I do not try to lead you away from this project, but I had the same dream because of the possibility of freedom this job might give to me, and I discover that was not very enjoyable. You're in front a screen all day and besides having a team and being near them, you're not "team building" as the company desperatly want you to feel with its ridiculously engaging Club Med workshop. You're "in the code" and you fix bugs most of the time.

Hopefully it's up to you to change this state of things and it's truly blissful when you succeed to bring peace and a more coherent flow of energy. It's not about changing others, but seeing through 'you', in this business madness is life changing. Then you change because you understand that you had to be very mad to go into this ^^.
 

Ruth

The Living Force
Excellent questions. I printed it out to answer a few questions at a time, or maybe one at a time. Some of my answers made me laugh, some of them made me sad. What a short period of time we have to really live.
 

PerfectCircle

Jedi Master
Nico said:
PerfectCircle said:
17. If you could choose one friend to trade careers with who would it be?
It is prone to changing, but anyone who is a programmer.

18. If you had to go back to college tomorrow what classes would you take?
Programming/software developing.

I am a programmer, and if you want to change I'm ready ! I do not try to lead you away from this project, but I had the same dream because of the possibility of freedom this job might give to me, and I discover that was not very enjoyable. You're in front a screen all day and besides having a team and being near them, you're not "team building" as the company desperatly want you to feel with its ridiculously engaging Club Med workshop. You're "in the code" and you fix bugs most of the time.

Hopefully it's up to you to change this state of things and it's truly blissful when you succeed to bring peace and a more coherent flow of energy. It's not about changing others, but seeing through 'you', in this business madness is life changing. Then you change because you understand that you had to be very mad to go into this ^^.

Hehe I thank you very much for your post.
The thing is.. I hate "teambuilding" :-[
Mostly because of 2 reasons:
- Half of employees at my job are quite toxic and can get you drained really fast,
- I am an introvert and dislike being around a large group of people (not counting friends or family here).

It is not like I have a project of switching to the programming job, it is more like a wish or passed chance for me.
I am not saying it is easy, far from it, but I consider it less stressful and more suitable for my personality than my current job.

Are you paid enough with it for a decent living? :cool2:
Cheers!
 

Nico

Jedi Council Member
PerfectCircle said:
- Half of employees at my job are quite toxic and can get you drained really fast,
- I am an introvert and dislike being around a large group of people (not counting friends or family here).

It is not like I have a project of switching to the programming job, it is more like a wish or passed chance for me.
I am not saying it is easy, far from it, but I consider it less stressful and more suitable for my personality than my current job.

Are you paid enough with it for a decent living? :cool2:
Cheers!

Mind you, it push you to be aware ALL the time, and to be compassionate beyond all what you think you know. My boss is the ugly funny harpie type, and my folks are quite sad/desperate/closed, so it's great when you succeed in team building, even just a little. But sometimes you need more than one week-end to recover from some stealth stealing which have past unoticed and when your stomach get sick even when you forgive/are open and say no, you become really pissed off. I am an introvert too but sometimes I am on the verge of becoming a mad extrovert !

The best is to learn quickly, develop a network, get known and sell your talent, becoming independent from any company... Or... you seek for something more connected to nature as I do, because I can't stand seeing the blue sky and the green leaves through the window while sitting in a deadly forest of computers full of invisible erratic nnEMF webs... Insane.

What's stressful is not programming in itself, it's the philosophy of the company, which when you get caught emotionally by it, can be very unpleasant. Programming is very fun when you have a clear project to focus on, it's like learning new languages in order to express the self :). The only drawback is the fact that you talk to a machine that's not responding otherwise than "bugs report" and silent warnings.

If I go through this company, I learn skills and become independent, I might starting a blog, just to talk about who I am in more details and giving informations to help others... While searching how to raise goats and survive in the wild.

I get just the money to live and get some nice devices to help myself (water distillator, hypoallergenic vacuum cleaner, soft steamer, FIR sauna (this one was a one month salary ouch), and vitamins...) The only thing that I miss is a community where all those stuff may help everyone. I'm alone (but all one) when I got home, I thought of gardening my mom's cat to have some company :P.

This post was also an answer to some questions above. Hope it helps you PerfectCircle.
 

PerfectCircle

Jedi Master
Nico said:
PerfectCircle said:
- Half of employees at my job are quite toxic and can get you drained really fast,
- I am an introvert and dislike being around a large group of people (not counting friends or family here).

It is not like I have a project of switching to the programming job, it is more like a wish or passed chance for me.
I am not saying it is easy, far from it, but I consider it less stressful and more suitable for my personality than my current job.

Are you paid enough with it for a decent living? :cool2:
Cheers!

Mind you, it push you to be aware ALL the time, and to be compassionate beyond all what you think you know. My boss is the ugly funny harpie type, and my folks are quite sad/desperate/closed, so it's great when you succeed in team building, even just a little. But sometimes you need more than one week-end to recover from some stealth stealing which have past unoticed and when your stomach get sick even when you forgive/are open and say no, you become really pissed off. I am an introvert too but sometimes I am on the verge of becoming a mad extrovert !

The best is to learn quickly, develop a network, get known and sell your talent, becoming independent from any company... Or... you seek for something more connected to nature as I do, because I can't stand seeing the blue sky and the green leaves through the window while sitting in a deadly forest of computers full of invisible erratic nnEMF webs... Insane.

What's stressful is not programming in itself, it's the philosophy of the company, which when you get caught emotionally by it, can be very unpleasant. Programming is very fun when you have a clear project to focus on, it's like learning new languages in order to express the self :). The only drawback is the fact that you talk to a machine that's not responding otherwise than "bugs report" and silent warnings.

If I go through this company, I learn skills and become independent, I might starting a blog, just to talk about who I am in more details and giving informations to help others... While searching how to raise goats and survive in the wild.

I get just the money to live and get some nice devices to help myself (water distillator, hypoallergenic vacuum cleaner, soft steamer, FIR sauna (this one was a one month salary ouch), and vitamins...) The only thing that I miss is a community where all those stuff may help everyone. I'm alone (but all one) when I got home, I thought of gardening my mom's cat to have some company :P.

This post was also an answer to some questions above. Hope it helps you PerfectCircle.

It surely does, I thank you once more.
I also understand very well what you mean with the weekend recovery ;)
 

whitecoast

The Living Force
FOTCM Member
I could easily devote paragraphs to each of these questions. Perhaps I will as a project. Here is my "blink" on the answers.

1. You’re on your deathbed looking back on your life. What did you like best about it?That I did my best to establish the normal conditions of human life for myself, against all the artificial technological and social conditions of modern life.

2. What is the one problem you were born to understand?What true spirituality is... my best answer as of today is that it's a question of my own relationship with the universe. It's something to be cherished, nurtured, and never taken for granted.

3. If you had only three wishes, what powers, possessions or qualities would you wish for?Teleportation across the globe. Iron will. Entrepreneurial know-how.

4. If you were granted three life mentors, who would they be and why?
Gurdjieff, Ark, Julius Caesar.

5. If you had one hour of prime time TV to address the world, what would you do?
Talk about psychopaths and their role in chaos.

6. If you had an opportunity to teach every child one life lesson, what would it be?

That your feelings matter and are valid and meaningful, but the meaning can also change over time so it's best to keep that in mind too.

7. If you knew with certainty that you would not fail at doing this, what would it be?
Become a genetic engineer and engineer algae/bacteria/fungi to metabolize and transform pollution to help clean up heavily polluted areas.

8. What is the single most important thing missing from your life right now?
Awareness and active attention. Fighting against a strong daydreaming tendency.

9. If you could predict the next big choice your life would present you, what would it be?
If I should change my job and/or occupation.

10. What would be your single greatest regret if you died tomorrow?
Feeling like I haven't re-payed the universe for the privileged life I've had

11. What is the “unlived life” of each of your parents and what effect has it had on your life?

Mom wanted to be a nurse, but wasn't smart enough, and so constantly pushed me to go for jobs that would challenge my mind. Dad wanted to work with cars but was told it was taboo to work with your hands so get a white collar job that makes more money. He taught me to resent the low paying science job I've taken working in environmental science.

12. What are your top three talents?

Listening, reading, photography

13. When were you the happiest and what were you up to?
On the beach in Hawaii with friends. In the wilderness exploring. Singing with friends.

14. What is your most memorable break with tradition or taboo, and what were you after?
Probably experimenting with drugs, speaking out against a group when my beliefs were challenged (sometimes due to conscience, other times due to narcissism), and coming out as gay.

15. What do you want to be remembered for after you die?

I don't know. My authenticity and sincerity, I guess.

16. What have you rejected that seems determined to claim you?

Video games and dissociation in general.

17. If you could choose one friend to trade careers with who would it be?

A friend who does master degree work developing medical patents.

18. If you had to go back to college tomorrow what classes would you take?
Something in STEM. Biology classes. Also, French and Spanish.

19. What is the most consistent message you’ve been getting about following a departure from the status quo in your work life?

Finding work in a major city and spending more time with my friends there.

20. What do you love most about your current job?
Working with my hands doing science testing that helps the environment. I also have agreeable co-workers.

21. When was the last time you were in a state of flow, in the zone and totally lost track of time? What were you doing?
Meditating. I also can get in "the zone" when running tests.
 

Anthony

The Living Force
FOTCM Member
I received the following in my mail a few months back, it's worth reading and reflecting on, IMO.

12 Questions That Will Change Your Life

The instinct is to look for answers, but the truth is that questions that teach us most. It can also be that the rhetorical questions—the ones that don’t even seem to have answers—that push and push the hardest. Who do you think you are? What does all this mean? Why? Why? Why?


The right question at the right time can change the course of a life, can still a turbulent mind, or heal an angry heart. While every situation can generate its own, there are twelve questions, I think, that deserve to be asked not just once but many times over the course of a lifetime, some even many times over the course of the day. I have gathered them from some of the wisest philosophers, most incisive thinkers, greatest leaders and most awesome badasses that ever lived. I’m not saying I know the answer to any of them, but I can say there is value in letting them challenge you. If you let them. If you let them do their work on you—and let them change you.


Start now by asking:


Who Do You Spend Time With? Goethe would say “Tell me who you spend time with and I will tell you who you are.” Who we know and what we do that influences more than any other factor, who we will become. Because what you do puts you around people, and the people you’re around affects what you do. Think about your friends and colleagues: do they inspire you, validate you, or drag you down? We seem to understand that a young kid who spends time with kids who don’t want to go anywhere in life, probably isn’t going to go anywhere in life. What we understand less is that an adult who spends time with other adults who tolerate crappy jobs, or unhappy lifestyles is going to find themselves making similar choices. Same goes for what you read, what you watch, what you think about. Your life comes to resemble its environment (Ben Hardy calls this the proximity effect). So choose your surroundings wisely.


Is This In My Control? Epictetus says that the chief task of the philosopher is to make the distinction between what is in their control and what is not—what is up to us and what is not up to us? We waste incredible amounts of time on the latter and leave so many opportunities on the table by mislabeling the former. Our actions, our thoughts, our feelings, these are up to us. Other people, the weather, external events, these are not. But here’s where it comes full circle: our responses to other people, the weather, external events are in our control. Making this distinction will make you happier, make you stronger and make you more successful if only because it concentrates your resources in the places where they matter.


What Does Your Ideal Day Look Like? If you don’t know what your ideal day looks like, how are you ever going to make decisions or plans for ensuring that you actually get to experience them on a regular basis? It’s important to take an inventory of the most enjoyable and satisfying days of your life. What did you do? Why did you like them? Now be sure that your job, personal life, even the place you’ve chosen to live takes you towards these, not away from them. If you don’t want an office, don’t set up an office. I run my company remotely. If you enjoy being in harness and that’s what makes you feel good, then you’ll probably need something that has a lot of responsibilities and set requirements. If you enjoy influence more than material success, then make sure you pick something that allows for that. If you’re a quiet person, then you need a lifestyle that will let you be quiet—not one that forces you to be constantly not yourself. If you thrive on attention and collaboration, then pick accordingly. If you want to live in the same place for a long time, maybe buy a house. If you don’t—God, please don’t. And on and on and on.


To Be Or To Do? One of the best strategists of the last century, John Boyd, would ask the promising young acolytes under him: “To be or to do? Which way will you go?” That is, will you choose to fall in love with the image of how success looks like or you focus on a higher purpose? Will you pick obsessing over your title, number of fans, size of paycheck or on real, tangible accomplishment? He said that in life there is a roll call and it sorts people by their answer to this question, the doers and those who simply pretend. Which will you be? Which have you been?


If I Am Not For Me, Who Is? If I Am Only For Me, Who Am I? The alternative translation of that last part is “If I am only only for me, what am I?” The answer is “the worst.” The question comes from Hillel the Elder (also happens to be a favorite quote of Reid Hoffman, the venture capitalist). It doesn’t make you a bad person to want to be remembered. To want to make it to the top. To provide for yourself and your family. But if this is all you want it is a problem. There is a balance. Think of someone like General George Marshall, winner of the Nobel Peace Prize for the Marshall Plan, who had the same traits that everyone has— ego, self-interest, pride, dignity, ambition—but they were “tempered by a sense of humility and selflessness.” When he was practically offered the command of the troops on D-Day he told President Roosevelt: “The decision is yours, Mr. President; my wishes have nothing to do with the matter.” It came to be that Eisenhower led the invasion and performed with excellence, Marshall’s opportunity to change history came soon after—winning the peace prize and saving Europe as Secretary of State.


What Am I Missing By Choosing To Worry or Be Afraid? As Gavin de Becker writes in The Gift of Fear, “When you worry, ask yourself, ‘What am I choosing to not see right now?’ What important things are you missing because you chose worry over introspection, alertness or wisdom?” Another way of putting it: Does getting upset provide you with more options? Obstacles in life make us emotional, but the only way we’ll survive or overcome them is by keeping those distracting emotions in check—if we can keep steady no matter what happens, no matter how much external events may fluctuate. The Greeks had a word for this: apatheia. It’s the kind of calm equanimity that comes with the absence of irrational or extreme emotions. And so when you find yourself indulging in those emotions, one way to get yourself back on track is simply by reminding yourself of the cost they incur: That you’re missing something by being nervous, scared, or anxious. That you’re taking your eye off the ball to do it. Can you afford that? Probably not.


Am I Doing My Job? The three-word command from Bill Belichick, Nick Saban, Sean Payton, Jason Garrett: Do Your Job. The last thing the great John Wooden would say to his players in the locker room before a game was, “Well, I’ve done my job.” So the question is: Are you doing yours? Do you even know what that job is? It’s important to remember that we can be very busy—exhaustingly busy—and still not be doing our job. We can be caught up in the things that don’t matter, we can be interfering and encroaching on someone else’s job, we can be just plain procrastinating. All these things keep us working—but not on the job that actually matters.


What Is The Most Important Thing? If you don’t know what the most important thing is to you, how do you know if you’re putting it first? How do you know if you’re taking the right steps to get it. Maybe the most important thing to you is family. Awesome, so that’s your priority. What it means is that not only do you have to start measuring yourself by family-related metrics, but you have to stop comparing yourself to people with different priorities. Maybe money is the most important thing to you. That’s perfectly fine. Know that and own it—as Michael Lewis writes, the problem is the lying to yourself. You have to know and own whatever it is. Only then can you understand what matters and what doesn’t. Only then can you say no—can you opt out of stupid races that don’t matter, or exist. Only then is it easy to ignore “successful” people, because most of the time they aren’t—at least relative to you, and often even to themselves. Only then you can develop the quiet confidence that Seneca called euthymia—“the belief that you’re on the right path and not led astray by the many tracks which cross yours of people who are hopelessly lost.”


Who Is This For? If you’re making something, selling something, trying to reach people you have to be able to answer this question. It is shocking how many entrepreneurs, writers, salesman, even politicians never bother to stop and go: Who the hell is my audience here? The result is that the message is out of tune or the wrong group is targeted (and failure usually follows). Every creative must stop and really think about who their audience is. What do these people want? What do they need? What value am I offering them? Don’t try to get lucky. Don’t follow your hunch. Get it right. Ask the question, make sure the answer is clear.


Does This Actually Matter? The reason that wise people never let the very real fact of their mortality slip too far from their mind (memento mori) is because it helps them ask this question: Given the shortness of life, does this thing I’m thinking about, worrying about, fighting about, throwing myself into even -flicking-g matter? Sadly, the answer is usually no. We want to ask ourselves this question before we throw good time after bad, before we waste more life than we have to. “You could leave life right now,” Marcus Aurelius reminded himself, “Let that determine what you do and say and think.” In light of that, does this thing you’re so worked up about actually matter? As Stephen Colbert, a man who has experienced unimaginable tragedy has recounted, “Momentary disappointments can be seen,’ as my mother used to say when we had a heart-breaker, ‘in the light of eternity. This moment is nothing in the light of eternity,’ and that opens you up to the next moment if you don’t put too much weight on the moment where you are failing right now.”


Will This Be Alive Time or Dead Time? Early on in my career I had a pivotal conversation with author Robert Greene. I was working full-time at a really good job but planning my next move, saving my money and thinking about what I might do next. I told him I wanted to write a book one day, but I wasn’t sure what, how or when or what about. He told me, Ryan, there are two types of time: Dead time—where we are just waiting and Alive time—where we are learning and active and leveraging. And then he left it there with me to decide which I would choose. Alive time or Dead Time? So let that question catch you the next time you find yourself sitting on your hands or goofing off as you wait. Let it jolt you back into line. Pick up a book, pick up a pen and get back to work. Resist the temptation to get distracted with silly politics or wanderlust. Make the most of every moment as you prepare for the next move or the next event. If you want to be productive, be fully alive.


Is This Who I Want To Be? Our mind has the cunning ability to make the distinction between what we do and who we are. The problem is that this is complete nonsense. You can’t be a good person if your actions are consistently bad. You can’t be a hardworking person if you take every shortcut you can. It doesn’t matter that you say you love someone, it only matters if you show that you love them. Remember Cheryl Strayed’s line: “In your twenties you’re in the process of becoming who you are, so you might as well not be an asshole.” This is true for life itself. You are what you do—so ask yourself whenever you’re doing something: Is this reflective of the person I want to be? That I see myself to be? How we do anything is how we do everything. It is who we are. So ask this question about every action, thought and word. Because it adds up in a way that no amount of self-image or belief ever will.


**


Last question. Sort of. It comes from the great Viktor Frankl, the psychotherapist who survived the Auschwitz and wrote many beautiful books. He tried, as best he could, to try to address that perennial question that every philosopher and hungry young person has struggled with: What is the meaning of life? Frankl struggled with this question too, surely the horrors of a concentration camp and the loss of one’s entire existence will do that to you. But he found that the answer was simple, though there was a problem how the question was posed. You see, he said, it is not us who get to demand of the world, “What is the meaning of life?” Rather, he said, life is demanding that we answer the question with the actions and decisions we make. That we create meaning in our choices and our beliefs. I think we create it in doing our best to challenge ourselves with the questions above:


What am I for?

What is my job?

Who do I want to be?

What’s up to me?

What does a good day look like?

Some are simpler than others, sure, but the answers rarely are—and the act of asking is the most important thing.
 

3DStudent

The Living Force
FOTCM Member
That's a good list, thanks Anthony.

If I Am Not For Me, Who Is? If I Am Only For Me, Who Am I?

I have often asked something similar to that, but I phrase it, "If I don't stand up for myself, who will?" So it's something like: you better be good to yourself and it's your responsibility to do so, if you choose. Besides this is 3D STS so the cards are stacked against you in a dog-eat-dog world.
 
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