Children of the Universe

Breton said:
Is it ok if I ask you, Belibaste, something about it? Often people make something creative, but I sometimes wish I could ask them something about their creations - so now I have a chance because you are accessible! You, are free to answer or not, of course!
I will put my comments below in square brackets:

Ok. Thanks for your comments. I've tried to answer them below.


I think you meant "your" soul?

You're right. I just corrected it. See original post.

"put at stakes": is that similar to the expression "put to the stake"? In other words is this a reference to the time of the Inquisition when a person was tied to a stake and burned? In this poem, a soul is "put to the stake" figuratively, that is, it goes through deep suffering, often due to mistakes by the personality?

I've written "at stakes" instead of "at stake". "put at stake" meant, in my mind, "endangered", "put at risk" but after a quick internet search I'm not sure that "put at stake" is correct English :huh: .

Anyhow it was meant to illustrate situations where a wrong choice could lead to losing your soul. There was no conscious reference to the inquisition's stake. But now you mention it, it sounds like an interesting reference!

Respecting your choice and your biterness
spell check: "bitterness"

Ok. Corrected.

Showing the path when being lost
Showing the light when facing ghost
I was wondering which is most what you meant here: "facing A ghost" or "facing THE" ghost. I was just thinking that the article "a" or "the" can change the meaning quite a bit. Did you have any particular ghost in mind?

In fact I wanted to write "Showing the light when facing ghosts", which represents in this context your fears. But "ghosts" didn't rime with "lost" so I removed the embarrassing "s".

Well, thanks to your feedback I just put it back. :)
 
Belibaste said:
"put at stakes": is that similar to the expression "put to the stake"? In other words is this a reference to the time of the Inquisition when a person was tied to a stake and burned? In this poem, a soul is "put to the stake" figuratively, that is, it goes through deep suffering, often due to mistakes by the personality?

I've written "at stakes" instead of "at stake". "put at stake" meant, in my mind, "endangered", "put at risk" but after a quick internet search I'm not sure that "put at stake" is correct English :huh: .

Anyhow it was meant to illustrate situations where a wrong choice could lead to losing your soul. There was no conscious reference to the inquisition's stake. But now you mention it, it sounds like an interesting reference!

Oh ok, that make sense, I now am with you. I somehow was not in that line of thought: you know, you put your life at stake, or your soul at stake, you have a lot at stake (when you invest a lot in something). Maybe I did not see it right away because it was plural, which fits if you want it to rhyme with mistakes and maybe also to convey the idea of it happening more than one time, and you want to do it in a poetic compact form. You are right though, it might not be strictly correct English, but even if it is not, poetic license allows this sort of bending of the rules, to my way of thinking, anyways.

Thank you for your response!
 
Glad you liked the song guys, thank you. That poem just touch me deeply. And yes Belibaste, it was a bit difficult to sing because the reason you mentioned, that´s why i decided to do a more "souly" approach in the second part, anyway was a wonderful experience to try to ride those words, i´m just feel disappointed because the lo-fi sound, i´m still learning how to do a decent recording.
 
Tykes said:
... i´m just feel disappointed because the lo-fi sound, i´m still learning how to do a decent recording.

Right, I know what you mean, it is not an easy thing - that whole "science" to get really clean recordings. I am trying to learn to do this myself on a budget, and it is tough - and there seems to be areas that one cannot cut corners on or else never be satisfied. But it is a fun challenge.
 
Pierre said:
Children of the Universe


Orphans of love, sobbing alone in a dark room
She's always been there, wiping your tears

Children of trauma, hearing your father's doom
She's always been there, soothing your fears

Seekers of care, in search of an invisble mother
She's always been there, were you seeing her?

Loving your doubts when you lost faith
Loving your life when you wished death

Giving you hope when you saw darkness
Giving you strength when you fought sadness

Helping you learn from your mistake
Helping your soul when put at stake

Respecting your choice and your bitterness
Respecting your anger and your blindness

Showing the path when being lost
Showing the light when facing ghosts

Helping you create when you seek destruction
Helping you awake when you cherish illusion

Caring gently sister of sorrows
Caring deeply for brothers and heroes

She was always here, did you see a glitch
when you turned your back for the wicked witch

She was always here, did you pay attention
when seeing yourself as pure perfection

Divine Cosmic Mind, God or Universe
She's your companion, your guide, your consciousness

Mother of each, the poor, the small, the weak
Loving you all, petty, silly or meek

Just waiting you empty your cup of fear
To fill it with the sweetest elixir

Open yourself children of the universe
To the loving voice of the life Goddess

Thank you .... :hug2: :perfect:
 
What a beautiful poem...prayer...reminder. Speaks directly to my heart. Thank you for creating it, Pierre!
 
Thank you so much, Pierre, really that's a wonderful poem.

And thanks to those that brought it forward again (solarmind et al) to ones notice.
 
3D Student said:
I read your thread the other day and this poem just now Belibaste. Thank you for posting it, it was really nice! :)

Eddie said:
One day I will be able to reflect upon these words with just as much understanding as you do.

Me too, I hope I can realize the words better some day.

So it's 6 years later and I saw the thread was bumped and read it again. She's always there for us, and all we have to do is ask. We can ask of the network by extension too. Like a parent watching over us always there, we suffer as much as needed, until we change the slide on the projector and go onto greater things. Thanks again. :)
 

Trending content

Back
Top Bottom