One thing to keep in mind. How many people are doing precisely what you're doing: staying quiet because they understand that there are consequences to dissent?
Not saying it's a majority or even a large minority.
But I guarantee you there are some.
In professional settings, those of our mind are keeping our mouths shut right now, waiting and watching, because the time is most certainly not yet to act.
Wise as serpents; gentle as doves.
I don't know psychegram, I'm starting to act - not outright and only within my local groups, but still.
I can't help it. I've reached the point where continuing to live this LIE is affecting me on levels beyond the physical.
I belong to a spiritual group where I live, one that used to meet monthly before this BS hit. The leader is a very wonderful, loving woman who used to own a great bookstore here in Sacramento, where I bought most of the books that made me who I am today. I count her as one of my closest confidants, and the only one who lives close to me at this time.
She sent out a Zoom invitation to join a group meeting last night. I had to work late and thus couldn't make it so I informed her, but I sent her some "extra" information about why I didn't want to "meet" with the group that came from a less-than-STO space, to put it lightly. I apologized almost immediately, but meditating on that the reason for my outburst was clear.
I am having a great deal of difficulty dealing with the cognitive dissonance I am experiencing among all the people who are physically close to me at this time. Only *one* person at work (my supervisor, thank God) is even willing to listen to anything I have to say about what is going on with this virus (and she's from Germany, so she understands totalitarianism). The rest of them are like lemmings, just yearning for the highest possible cliff to jump off of in unison.
I get looks of disgust because I am one of the few who doesn't wear a mask at work (my supervisor is one of the others). And any time I pass someone in the hallway without going up against the wall, or backing up to the intersection so they can pass at a distance of more than six feet, I again get dirty looks. People in my own section are among the most egregious "enforcers".
I have my own desk in my own lab room where we run our bioassays. While working, I often use my computer to listen to videos and audios from SOTT or Suspicious Observers or any other video like the ones posted on this thread. It's MY room, MY computer, screw the STS implications!! But there are several people who work with me performing these tests. When I started playing some of those videos with them present, like ones by Suzanne Humphries or Suspicious Observers, I noticed that they did their best to finish their work quickly and leave the room. And just recently, ALL of them have started wearing "ear pods" that pump music into their brains to drown out my stuff when they are in that room. So I gave up and I now keep total silence in my lab and just let them be.
OK, I apologize for the lack of "external considering". I guess I felt it was a way to get caught up on news while giving them another view into the world that could be helpful to them, and also so they could understand where *I* am coming from. But they never even once wanted to confront their own beliefs, nor ever ask me about mine. They would rather be programmed by the MSM and forget I exist. In any case, what I experienced drove home to me - finally - the the fact that you can't even try to "help" someone else if they don't want to be helped, once and for all. But I did what I did because I wanted them to understand ME at least. That, too, was selfish now I know. And all I got from it is now I am known as "THAT GUY".
Anyway: dealing with all of that at work has weakened my resolve. And from my experiences with the spiritual group, most of them would be just like my co-workers, as otherwise open-minded and caring as they are. Having to do a "Zoom" meeting with them, knowing they all lived close and what I also know about this HOAX virus was just too much. Doing the meeting that way just validates the HOAX, and I just can't live the lie any more. If I thought anyone there would be open to my ideas and I could use Zoom to introduce them to the group, that would be another thing...but it isn't *my* group, and doing so would again violate their free will.
So, I don't think I can bring myself to do any more meetings with them via Zoom. Even just doing it to check in with them to say "hi" and sending love seems hollow to me, because the very medium they are using facilitates an underlying great LIE. And I can't bring myself to lie again. But I also can't use that time to introduce what I think because it's not my forum, and they don't want to hear it.
This is truly a "separation of worlds". But I have learned, of myself, that I just can't take this BS any more. I can't make myself wear a mask, unless I take it so far beyond the pale that I make a POINT while doing so (e.g. wearing that WWII gas mask). But even that leaves me open to mockery and chastisement. Yet I can't do otherwise!
It's as if I feel a VERY strong internal need to rebel, visibly, just HOPING someone else "gets it". I see now that doing so won't serve others, but make me a pariah. However, I have this question for the forum:
Is it important to live WHO YOU ARE, and stay true to the TRUTH you have EARNED, even if doing so causes everyone else around you to ignore and even despise you? Because I can do no less, and I am SICK of doing NOTHING. I have a very hard time just "going along to get along." Doing so will just hasten the process of destruction, in my view.
I think I may now have an inkling of how certain apostles and philosophers felt while trying to spread their knowledge...