Grant McNee: Dangerous Cyberpath


Scots internet rat used dating site to prey on terrified women across the world

Dec 29 2009 By Karen Bale
Grant McNee

FIVE terrorised women from different sides of the world have revealed how they fell victim to a Scots internet sex cheat.

And they spoke of their fears that twisted charmer Grant McNee has used the web to prey on dozens more women worldwide.

Flabby, red-faced McNee is an unlikely Casanova. He's unemployed and lives with his elderly mum in Larbert, Stirlingshire.

But he has used a dating website,, to snare lovers in South Africa, Canada and back home in Scotland.

McNee's victims tell chillingly similar stories of how he quickly turns from a loving boyfriend into a snarling, money-grabbing, drunken control freak.

He told two lovers he was an expert in disposing of bodies, and bragged to another that he had been trained to kill in the SAS.

The women say McNee, 43, took over their lives and fleeced them out of thousands of pounds while cheating on them with other conquests he met online.

And some say that after they dumped him, they or their friends received chilling email threats from a stalker known as the Grim Reaper.

Every time he found a new victim, McNee would tell her about his previous lovers.

His five exes used the clues he left to get in touch with one another. And they all want to warn other women to steer clear of the rat.

One of McNee's ex-lovers, South African Ingrid Blignault, 40, wept as she told the Record: "I still get the shakes when I hear his name.

"I call him the psychotic parasite. He should not be allowed to continue to do this to women."

McNee met driving instructor Ingrid in 2003 while living in South Africa and quickly moved in with her in Johannesburg.

But within days, he made her get rid of all her electrical gadgets and buy his for s3600.

And in the weeks that followed, McNee's behaviour became bizarre and frightening.

She said: "He stopped my friends from visiting me. If they did, he would swear at me and call me a lesbian or a -jezebel- in front of my children.

"He would not let the children show me affection or even sit beside me. He would send them to their rooms, slam doors and swear at them."

Ingrid said McNee spent every night drinking. She added: "He would taunt me all night. The minute I fell asleep he would wake me and shout at me.

"I shook at work and couldn't function. He used to call me up to 40 times a day and ask where I was and who I was talking to."

The final straw for Ingrid came after another woman came to her and confessed she had been seeing McNee.

He begged Ingrid's forgiveness but she insisted he go to a psychiatrist. And she was horrified by the expert's findings.

Ingrid said: "The psychiatrist phoned and told me my children and I were in danger.

"I was urged to quickly get a restraining order and physical protection."

The doctor also told Ingrid in a letter: "Mr McNee was suffering from bipolar disturbance. He needs medication.

"If he's not treated, this may result in aggressive behaviour. He should remain under specialised psychiatric care."

Terrified, Ingrid ordered McNee to get out of her house and her life.

She told our reporter: "He moved out next day while I was at work and took my kids' baby photos and all my belongings.

"He then called me every half-hour to abuse me. He said he was going to get his friend in England to come and kill me.

"He also gave my ex-husband death threats because he had told me about the other woman and got her to call me."

Ingrid and her ex-husband Colin called police on McNee in October 2003. He was not charged, and later left South Africa.

Even with McNee gone, Ingrid's ordeal was not over. She began to receive terrifying emails from an address with the username Grim Reaper.

Her tormentor told her: "I will come after you with everything I can. You're an easy target Ingrid and you are also a tramp.

"You're nothing but a -jezebel- and white trash. You're a f*****g bitch and most know it.

"I have friends in South Africa you wouldn't like to meet. The average Dutchman would gladly deal with you in a car park. Don't f*** with the buffalo, you sick bitch."

Before leaving South Africa, McNee had lined up another victim - English expat Henriette O'Bryan. He met her online in July 2003.

McNee proposed to the widowed mumof-one within four days and gave her a s5000 ring he had bought for Ingrid.

Henriette and McNee then moved back to the UK, where they lived in London and Chelmsford, Essex.

"I was taken in by his lies," said secretary Henriette, 41, who finally split from McNee in February 2006.

"I felt sorry for him. He told me his ex was a bunny-boiler. I was in love with him so I booked him flights to get him to the UK."

Within a few months, McNee was showing his true colours.

Henriette said: "When I was working, he phoned me twice an hour. And if I was out with friends, he called every 10 minutes. At first it was nice because he told me he couldn't live without me, but it soon became frightening.

"If we had a fight, he would say he'd been a diver in the Army and knew how to hide bodies in the ocean. I was terrified of him."

McNee began disappearing at weekends and Henriette became suspicious. She looked on his computer and found "eight or nine files for different girls he was seeing".

"I read the emails and just went ice-cold," she recalled. "I broke down and sobbed.

"But when I quizzed him he blamed me, saying I didn't give him enough attention."

Henriette gave McNee another chance and he persuaded her to pay off s16,000 of his debts. He also got her to transfer s7000 of her savings to his account.

McNee then packed Henriette off to South Africa to visit her mum, then promptly dumped her by text. She said: "I cried my eyes out. I'd been taken for a fool. I spent my life savings on him."

Henriette sued McNee last year and he was ordered to repay her s47,000. But he has since declared himself bankrupt and she fears she will never see her money.

McNee's next victim was Canadian Sarah Wilson, a single mum with two kids. He met her on the internet in August 2005, while he was still with Henriette.

Sarah was living in England at the time. But after she wed McNee in 2006, they set up home in the Canadian capital, Ottawa.

"He never proposed," said Sarah, 41, who works with people with special needs. "He just said, 'Let's get married' and sent me to buy the ring. It cost me s280.

"He brainwashed me and isolated me from my friends and family, then pushed and pushed for us to move to Canada.

"Then as soon as we were married, he stopped being affectionate and began drinking a bottle of Jack Daniel's every night."

Sarah said McNee constantly told her he had been a sniper and knew how to dispose of bodies. Then she learned her husband was a love cheat.

Sarah said: "He went back to the UK for a holiday and I later found out he'd met a girl on the internet while he was there. He began seeing her as soon as he got back.

"I found out about his cheating when I found messages on his computer, and I dumped him.

"I wanted to kill myself after I was destroyed by that monster.

"He terrorised me. He robbed me, cheated on me and left me a broken woman.

"In hindsight, I realised he only wanted to marry me to get into Canada. And after we split, I found out he was still with Henriette when we got together."

While Sarah tried to rebuild her life, McNee moved on to another victim, Canadian Stephanie Moines, 40. He met her in October 2007, again on his favourite dating site.

McNee moved into Stephanie's home within weeks and was soon sponging off her. He spent her cash on lobster dinners, champagne, strip clubs and porn, and ran up a huge credit card bill.

"He's very charming at first," said government worker Stephanie.

"He writes you love poems and tells you that you're the woman of his dreams. But within days of moving in, he's taken over. " McNee told Stephanie tales about being a former SAS soldier who had been held hostage in the Middle East.

But he was also honest for once, admitting "major addictions" to booze, sex and spending money.

Stephanie stuck with McNee and he rewarded her by betraying her. She found hundreds of calls to other women logged on his computer.

She said: "He was cheating on me with at least four women and begging at least a dozen others to meet him for sex."

Stephanie told McNee it was over and he responded with a vicious hate campaign.

She said: "He began calling me 30 times a day. He told me he was determined to destroy me, both professionally and personally.

"He was never physically violent but he threatened to cut my throat. When we broke up after 10 months, it felt like 10 years.

"This man completely depletes all your resources. He is a parasite.

"But he's his own worst enemy, because he tells each girlfriend about the others which let us get in touch with each other."

McNee moved back to Scotland and found another woman to prey on, hairdresser Heather Cupples, 38. He dated the mum-of-two from West Lothian for nine months, starting in January this year.

Heather said: "He was very pushy and would obsessively phone and text me.

"I'd had enough of him after a few months.

"Then my dad passed away and I moved in with my mum and Grant was furious. He was living with me at the time on a temporary basis.

"He began sending me nasty texts demanding I spent time with him.

"He left me 30 angry and abusive voicemails on the day of my dad's funeral."

Heather learned from McNee's computer in September that he was seeing a string of other women behind her back.

She said: "I spoke to this woman in London to warn her about Grant and it turned out she had been up here staying with him while I was seeing him.

"I was gobsmacked. He was planning to move in with her in a matter of weeks."

Heather took her revenge on McNee by arranging to meet him in a pub and handing him dozens of emails he had sent to one of his other lovers, all wrapped in a pink ribbon. He stormed out.

In recent weeks, Heather's ex-husband Jimmy, who is still friendly with her, has begun receiving sinister emails from the "Grim Reaper".

One message said: "Why would you want to be with someone who cannot keep her knickers on? She is truly a horrible creature."

When the Record approached McNee to ask him to explain his treatment of women, he sneered: "You can't prove anything. Write what you like."

HAVE you fallen victim to McNee? Email us at or call us on 0141 309 3251.


FOTCM Member
purplehaze said:
That's some story, eh?

By the way, your site make-over looks terrific.
Wow. That's just awful. I still have trouble wrapping my mind around how someone can be so predatory. I may not be able to understand the motives, but I definitely understand that these predators are out there.


FOTCM Member
Received the following complaint:

From: Amber Mun <>

Message Body:

Dear Sir/Madam

I work for the Press Complaints Commission, the UK’s press regulatory body. I am writing in relation to an article that has been reproduced at the following site, having originally been published in The Daily Record newspaper:

Mr Grant McNee, who features in the article, contacted us to say that the article contained inaccuracies and was misleading. In view of these and other concerns, the newspaper has now removed the original article from its website.

In light of this, I wonder if you might consider taking similar action. Obviously we have no formal powers to enforce this, but I would be grateful if you could let me know.

Many thanks and kind regards,

Amber Mun


The Living Force
A few days ago Grant McNee contacted me regarding a story about him that had been posted in the Enpsychopedia

This is a screenshot of the original story about Grant Mcnee, published by in December of 2009

He wanted to know if I could help him get the story removed from the Enpsychopedia. According to the article, 5 different woman, from different countries, were victimized by this man. It appears that about a year later, Mcnee managed to get the story taken down by the DailyRecord by using a "PCC complaint." I haven't been able to contact the victims yet (I do intend to) but I strongly suspect they weren't able to take part in this complaint procedure due to the fact that they live in other countries?

I decided to give Mcnee the benefit of the (little) doubt and ask some questions.
What follows is what I consider to be an excellent example of pathological behavior I thought I'd share.

First Mcnee sends this email to a friend of mine asking for help.

I have changed and I am seeing a counsellor every week. I am in a good relationship with one woman and not interested in anything else. Neither of us drink but this vile bile on the internet is killing my chances of work and of a future that I can be proud of. I am a Taoist now and live my life clean. I am not perfect but I keep myself out of harms way.

I would appreciate any assistance I can get in having this article removed.

The source has been removed already as the paper and the press complaints have already agreed that the story was manipulation and there were many many inaccuracies as well as illegal hacking onto both my computer and my phone. Sure, I was no angel but I have mended my ways and I don’t want my daughter reading about this nonsense.
Next I get two very manipulative emails from Mcnee...clearly he wants to know who I am.

I will need to validate who I am speaking to before I give any further details. The Scottish police, the press complaints commission are both involved. If I was a shark then why would I do that ?. I have broken no law and have suffered for 3 years on this now and 2 years trying to resolve this with the press here. It is now been agreed albeit in private so they don’t have to pay me out. If I was some scumbag they would have continued after me. The Leveson enquiry into hacking has brought the tabloids to their knees here because of their underhanded methods and the innocent people they have targeted.

Surely the good people get a chance to clear their names and move on with their lives ?

Whoever Guardian is ? please get in touch and lets discuss how this can be resolved and how I can help others to fight this type of abuse ?

Many thanks XXXX, as always a good friend.
I am happy to provide that once I know who I am dealing with and whether they can have this slur lifted.

We all know that the internet is dangerous and it ruins lives.
As yawl know, I'm not exactly shy, so I wrote him back and included my name, address and phone number. He replied with:

Hi Betsy,

Thanks for your email. To be honest I am not sure who they are and only know the names as Gary has been helpful in pointing them out.

I have been dealing with a British newspaper for a couple of years now through the British Press Complaints due to a story being written about me which was mostly fabricated lies and where my pc and phone were broken into by and ex partner and the information shared on social networking sites etc.

I am at the point now due to the Leveson enquiry here where the paper has agreed to remove the article and contact the websites concerned to take down the article. There is however some of the sites such as Enschyopedia where they are not able to contact anyone and the damage will just remain forever.

This is why Gary thought that you may be able to assist me. I just want to get on with my life.


Best Regards,

ScreenHunter_02 Maymacsmisc
I wrote him back and asked him "Which article are you referring to?" since I still had no idea what he was talking about.

He replied with a one line email instructing me to google him.

Please google grant mcnee and you will see exactly what i refer to
Since the original article doesn't mention why it should be removed, I wrote him again, asking him to be more specific.

>At 08:36 AM 12/9/2011, you wrote:
>The source has been removed already as the paper and the press complaints have already >agreed that the story was manipulation and there were many many inaccuracies as well as >illegal hacking onto both my computer and my phone.

Hi Grant,

Could you be a bit more specific here? Exactly what are you claiming was a "manipulation" and what were the "inaccuracies?" Do you have any police reports regarding the "illegal hacking?"

Then Mr. McNee responds in his full psychopathy glory

Hi Betsy,

Why would I need to be more specific ? This has taken 2 years of my life and caused untold damages. The Press Complaints commission has requested the paper take it down under the code of practice as I have shown inaccuracies and clandestine actions and subterfuge. They do not do this lightly.

Yes there are 3 police reports but it was seen as a civil matter. I also went to two lawyers but could not afford to retain their services after they told me what it would cost due to the many countries involved etc.

The manipulation is straight forward, I left the army in 1990 and the 1st Gulf war didn’t start till a year later. They all knew I was in the Royal Signals and not the SAS as they had seen my army record and photos. Also I was a recreational diver many years later with nothing to do with the forces. I did a rescue diver course where we were taught how to save people not hide their dead bodies.

This is huge manipulation and anyone can see that. I am no psycho and nothing even close.

Best Regards,

ScreenHunter_02 Maymacsmisc

"A government is like fire, a handy servant, but a dangerous master." - George Washington (1732 - 1799)
From: "MacsMisc" <>
To: "'Guardian'" <>
Cc: "'Amber Mun'" <>
Subject: RE: due process
Date: Mon, 12 Dec 2011 15:14:51 -0000

If you need more information on the PCC and the workings of this case please speak to Ms Mun. The PCC is a regulating body of the press and deal with complaints associated with it. I have been dealing with them for over 2 years in trying to prove my case.

Ms Mun is very helpful however I do not want my privacy further invaded so should be restricted to the facts of the case and no further information or data that I have provided to the PCC should be distributed to a third party and that includes people I don’t know in the North America region ie you Betsy.

I am happy to show my innocence and what I have done to prove that but I am not willing to divulge invormation that I have and provided to the PCC and the British Authorities that they cannot control or take action on.

Sorry if this seems unhelpful but I am not stupid and I have been in the past.

Hope this helps.

Best Regards,

ScreenHunter_02 Maymacsmisc

"A government is like fire, a handy servant, but a dangerous master." - George Washington (1732 - 1799)
Then he writes the author of the original article about him "Amber Mun" :

From: "MacsMisc" <>
To: "'Amber Mun'" <>,
"'Guardian'" <>
Subject: RE: FW: due process
Date: Mon, 12 Dec 2011 19:23:48 -0000

Ms Mun,

Here is your contact for endsychopedia, I don’t really understand why they think they can print vile bile and hatred and when you show it is lies they want a dr’s note and a judges letter but perhaps that is the American Way. I am merely trying to clear my name as you know and it has taken a long time.

Can I ask you to please contact Betsy at and state this case but to please whithold all personal information that I have provided to the PCC as this is legal and to bew honest none of their business.

My view is that this website is vile and hate and smearing people and anyone associated with it should be tarnished with the same.

I can only hope that Betsy is one of the good ones and can at least influence the idiots that clearly sit on the keyboards.


Best Regards,

ScreenHunter_02 Maymacsmisc

"A government is like fire, a handy servant, but a dangerous master." - George Washington (1732 - 1799)

So I wrote Ms Mun too:

Date: Mon, 12 Dec 2011 16:33:41 -0500
To: "MacsMisc" <>, "'Amber Mun'" <>
From: Guardian <>
Subject: RE: FW: due process

Greetings Ms. Mun,

It's clear Mr. McNee does not understand the concept of a "Wiki" I am not responsible for the entry about him, in fact, I knew nothing about him before being contacted by XX XXXXX (XXXX, in the future, please keep your nuts to yourself)

All my contributions to the Enpsychopedia relate to child sexual predators, and are easy to spot because they're mirrored on my own websites:

Mr. McNee wrote me asking for my help in removing someone else's entry, so I asked him for details. You can see his response to me. I do not have the time or inclination to deal with this man further.


Then Mcnee emails me again (after I've told him I don't want to deal with him) and tells me I just won the "Rudest Email Ever" .. without even trying. If I'd known there was a contest, I could have done much better. :lol:

From: "MacsMisc" <>
To: "'Guardian'" <>
Cc: "'Amber Mun'" <>
Subject: RE: FW: due process
Date: Mon, 12 Dec 2011 22:58:58 -0000

That was the rudest email ever. Please do not ever contact me again.

I was merely trying to have a sick websites comments removed after years of abuse and put you in touch with a respectable member of the press complaints commission in the UK.

If this is the help you give people then god help us all. You add to the vile bile that this site puts online and hopefully the authorities will intervene and put you all to justice. I am just trying to get on with my life

Ms Mun again, I am truly sorry

Best Regards,

ScreenHunter_02 Maymacsmisc

Needless to say, I'm not going to 'help' Mcnee, because personally I believe the victims. Mcnee demonstrated the same sense of entitlement, and bullying behavior they described in their statements.


FOTCM Member
This thread was moved to privacy mode while we investigated. As Guardian points out, the guy seems to be guilty of exactly what these women say and has only managed to suppress the story based on technicalities. So, back onto the public forum it goes.


The Living Force
Laura said:
This thread was moved to privacy mode while we investigated. As Guardian points out, the guy seems to be guilty of exactly what these women say and has only managed to suppress the story based on technicalities. So, back onto the public forum it goes.
Once I've had a chance to contact the victims and ask if they like to be re-interviewed for an update, I'll let yawl know.


The Living Force
Thank you for taking the time and effort Laura! It gives me a warm, gooy feeling inside every time a 'path doesn't get to insult, intimidate, bully and threaten his way into getting whatever he wants.

I can't help but think how these women must have felt when the original story was pulled?


The Living Force
Just another example of what happens when you question what a psycho tells you, and/or don't give it what it wants. {BOLD emphasis and blue text comments are mine}

Received: from MacPC ( [])
by with ESMTPS id ei9sm25220924wid.0.2011.
(version=TLSv1/SSLv3 cipher=OTHER);
Mon, 19 Dec 2011 02:39:44 -0800 (PST)
From: "MacsMisc" <>
To: "'Guardian'" <>
Subject: be careful Xxxx this woman is part of the hate team
Date: Mon, 19 Dec 2011 10:36:09 -0000
Message-ID: <000f01ccbe3a$05fa1d80$11ee5880$@com>

Well at least I was right about you. You are a really nasty piece of work. {like all psychopaths, it must always be "right" this case about someone it'd never met, spoken to, or had any interaction with what-so-ever}

Thank god I told you exactly what you wanted to hear and nothing else. {it thinks it knows what I wanted, and that's what it told me} Perhaps you can put this on your website. I am not going to let you get to me the way you want to.

You can call people what you like but it doesnt mean its true. You choose to attack men on the basis of them being men and thats the not so funny part. {it completely overlooks the fact that I've exposed as many female 'paths as male, perhaps more? I'd have to count}

You need to get a life and stop attacking people. {I'd never heard of this 'path until it contacted me} I have nothing to hide and nothing to expose so your efforts are a total waste of time. {yet it contacted me to get a story someone else posted removed, and continues to send insulting emails since I refused to "help" it}

You call yourself Guardian, thats a joke you are nothing more than a person who feeds on other peoples misery !!! {every single email from it has contained a personal insult since I asked it to provide details regarding its completely unsolicited request for assistance}


The Living Force
creepy. I can't pull up the original article... i think i'll mirror it on my blog for good measure so I can link to it as an example of pathological behavior. I think these stories really help people grok their particular pathological nature.


FOTCM Member
Yeah, this is typical pathological behavior, Guardian. Accusing you of all the 'path has been up to....

And that's a great idea, Puck. Spread the knowledge! :)


The Living Force
Puck said:
creepy. I can't pull up the original article... i think i'll mirror it on my blog for good measure so I can link to it as an example of pathological behavior. I think these stories really help people grok their particular pathological nature.
Thanks Puck, that's a good idea. What's funny is this 'path wasn't even on any of my predator pages or blogs (which is about to change) because there were no children involved. I think I'll make a special page just for him.

It got my name from a friend after telling him a sob story of how it'd "changed" (in less than two years) Of course I was willing to give him the benefit of the doubt and look at the facts. It's always possible for a man to be a TOTAL dating dog, and still not be a 'path, especially in cultures where "playing around" and lying to "get laid" is encouraged in men.

But then it immediately switched to claiming it was "innocent" and had been wronged. 5 different women, from different countries, who did not know each other before being scammed by it, were supposedly lying...and anyone who reports on his predation is "evil" All signs of remorse disappeared when he emailed me (a woman)

The only way I could prove that all the insults it was hurling at me weren't true, was by believing its story without question. If I am a "good person" I'll just "take its word for it"

I suspect this is the same type of manipulation it used with the 5 women in the story...until they got together and compared notes.

What's funny is that I hadn't done anything else on its case, hadn't even given it a second thought. I wasn't going to try to contact his victims and update the story until after Christmas due to the serious emotional issues involved. Being reminded of a painful encounter with a psychopath is the last thing a woman needs a few days before Christmas, when emotions are running high anyway. I intended (and still do) to wait until after the new year to try and contact it was just sitting on my ToDo list.

It just assumed I was sitting here thinking about nothing but it, and that I actually care what it thinks of me. Gee a 'path who used and abused at least 5 women thinks I'm "evil" ...and that's supposed to be a bad thing? :rolleyes:
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