Intellect and Emotion - Two different people within me - What you want is on the other side of the lesson

[Alejo]

I think a big part of the emotion that held me back was the feeling of being let down or disappointment in the opportunity. I have had this emotion before and it is tiring.

That's one big word, believe it or not.

I have been thinking about this recently as part of the romantic fiction reading.. disappointment, and how it sneaks itself into our lives, to be disappointed, to disappoint someone, or life itself. But it's not so much the disappointment part, it's the being afraid of it.

And well, I've come to realize a few things over the years, even if I still struggle with it myself, or rather, I have been able to rationalize the thoughts around it but to viscerally incorporate it is another matter on its own.

Disappointment is inevitable, you will be disappointed and you will disappoint others. it seems rather logical but sometimes that very feeling can overwhelm the senses. And so, perhaps I would begin to explore that with a question from yourself to yourself: What does/would disappointment mean? And you might discover, as you explore those answers little by little, that there's a fear, sometimes irrational, yet very real, tied to an experience or an event or several that informed your emotional self to avoid disappointment at all costs, so much so that you've become unaware of the behavior and it only manifests itself as a "freezing sensation".

And from there start to unravel it and see what else may lie at the core. And in some cases you will realize that it had nothing or very little to do with reality. And then you might reach a point where you see how the program that created the fear to disappoint, was a useful aspect of yourself, a brilliant response to something that may have occurred to you at one stage in your life, but that it already occurred and you can change that from a constant threat, to a memory.

And i think this is one way to address some of these fears that manifest themselves in such subtle ways.

And while you do some of the work, you might find the idea of courage inspiring, which is to act despite the fear that sometimes never leaves. But that's what it means to be human, I think, it's being able to act beyond our immediate programing, which I also think sometimes it's both the way to get into and out trouble.

 

[Menna]

And from there start to unravel it and see what else may lie at the core.

loss is in there I had a good friend from childhood enter my life at lets say 4yrs old and remove himself at let say 12 that has stuck with me. - Emotionally

Being excited or hopeful for something the majority of the time meaning 6 out of 10 times on the other side of that hope/excitement has been disappointment/let down so there is also the realization that I am not special and I am not protected thus the chances are when reviewing my life mathematicaly what is waiting on the other side of excitement/Hope is....

I also know I will follow through with this opportunity to explore it but based on life history I believe my emotions are reluctant and they freeze my body because my emotions are like a tiny kid and they don’t want to get hurt but my intellect is older. Thus the knowing I will see it through but the intellect still knows the past and that’s when the emotion kicks in. It seems the intellect and emotions are working together but there is more to work or gain from a perspective standpoint in my emotional centers.

I don’t look down in my emotional center in this instance per say I know why and what it’s doing...if you walk down a street and the majority of the time you get attacked why would the emotions walk down that street again and the feeling of opportunity the hope/excitement is that street. It comes down to chance I am chancing the feeling of hurt I respect my emotional center for recognizing that and shying away it has had enough experiences for one lifetime

 

[Guest 15258]

Being excited or hopeful for something the majority of the time meaning 6 out of 10 times on the other side of that hope/excitement has been disappointment/let down so there is also the realization that I am not special and I am not protected thus the chances are when reviewing my life mathematicaly what is waiting on the other side of excitement/Hope is....

I think part of the reason that 4DSTS find it so easy to condition us to suppress emotions is that some of them don't feel good, and so it seems natural to avoid them.

But if you think about it, avoiding unpleasant experiences is kind of self serving. It's like the polar opposite of experience seeking.

Another suggestion, for you to consider, is to focus your intent on being/moving toward STO.

 

[lainey]

Have you been following the New title: Romantic Fiction, Reality Shaping and The Work thread by any chance, Menna? I think you could benefit from reading some romantic novels. Laura wrote the following:

I second what Mariama has suggested. I think you would benefit from getting involved in this reading project. You can always post some of your observations in this thread and see where it takes you.
Also, if you do decide to post in more detail about your goals and projects we can offer more detailed advice on that as well if that's what you would like.

 

[Yas]

Being excited or hopeful for something the majority of the time meaning 6 out of 10 times on the other side of that hope/excitement has been disappointment/let down so there is also the realization that I am not special and I am not protected thus the chances are when reviewing my life mathematicaly what is waiting on the other side of excitement/Hope is....

Maybe that's the case, and it is normal. I think we've all gone through this realization at some point of our lives, where we see that being overly excited and hopeful about something can be disappointing, it's natural, I think. And the risk is always there that when you do something or choose something, you'll be disappointed.

The thing is, trying to see it mathematically as you are isn't the best approach because we tend to forget the 'good' things more easily than the 'bad' things. There were a few studies made that show how we not only forget the 'good' things but we are also more prone to not even notice those 'good' things that happen to us. Sometimes, a situation that looks 'bad' can actually be seen as 'good' too, because it has taught us a lesson or the results that came from it moved us to a better path.

So, what I'm saying is that the mathematical weight you put on 'bad things happen when I'm excited and hopeful about something' could be a bit skewed by the natural tendency to notice the 'bad' things more. And even if your calculations are right, there's nothing indicating that it should be the same forever.

I also know I will follow through with this opportunity to explore it but based on life history I believe my emotions are reluctant and they freeze my body because my emotions are like a tiny kid and they don’t want to get hurt but my intellect is older. Thus the knowing I will see it through but the intellect still knows the past and that’s when the emotion kicks in. It seems the intellect and emotions are working together but there is more to work or gain from a perspective standpoint in my emotional centers.

I'm familiar with some fear responses remaining over time even though I can understand intellectually that there's nothing to fear, or at least not to the extent that my body responds to certain situations. Sometimes, I get this response too and my body will shake and freeze even though I know that what's happening isn't threatening at all.

I think it's got something to do with learned responses as Alejo was hinting, and it could be that these are things that we can't fully solve intellectually. It could be one of those things that need that 'bottom-up approach' mentioned in the Healing Developmental Trauma thread. For me, what seems to help with these responses is Neurofeedback and Éiriú Eolas, because they help to regulate the nervous system and at least give a space between that emotional response, its manifestation and my awareness of it, which helps to see it for what it is and even learn how to regulate it better when it happens. It may linger for some time still, but I guess that with continuous work on both approaches 'top-down' as in understanding and analyzing and 'bottom-up' as in regulating the system with these other tools, this fear response can come to more normal levels and more in line with what we can actually understand with our awareness.

 

[Amelopsis Shakti]

a tiny kid and they don’t want to get hurt but my intellect is older. Thus the knowing I will see it through but the intellect still knows the past and that’s when the emotion kicks in.

so this struck a chord for me :

This (your quoted observation excerpt) moment is where we can transmute and grow our abilities to observe and respond with awareness and with our best purpose at heart..

It’s beautiful really, although admittedly so painful that the ego sends us into a story of fighting or flying for survival.
You’ve recognized precisely the circumstances which for YOU evoke this conditioned pattern. One of Your Souls Patterns, if you will. This Fear response is the key moment, the context is the child’s story.
So now you can DISCERN this Outer/Inner Pattern....you become AWARE that your judgement of emotional intelligence value over intellect is where your conflict begins.
This is the moment where your alignment of consciousness, your frequency resonance....becomes disturbed.
So it does become simple then to break the pattern dissolve it, by choosing ...not fear...love (as I choose to see it) is what is real.
With that choice, it brings our bodily felt emotion, which is our resonant frequency, along with, in harmonic harmony perhaps, our intellect‘s resonant frequency to Align us, fully. All energy Centers responding in harmony..
As Above So Below.
As Inward,So Outward.

I truly hope I have conveyed this in a manner that makes my message available to be received as I have intended it

 

[Menna]

Is a souls pattern as you say it the lesson we contemplate we have to learn in 5D (contemplation density) before we reincarnate.
In this instance it would be not to let my emotional center bully my intellectual and also physical?

 

[ephemerality]

The emotional self, often psychoanalytically termed the unconscious or subconscious self (depending on how you look at it), is socially conditioned to work on a basis of Eros (ἔρως). It has, much like the physical body, muscles that should be developed. As much as one would train one's body or one's mind, one should be able to train one's emotional self, in order to fully integrate these complex aspects within.

 

[Jones]

so this struck a chord for me :

This (your quoted observation excerpt) moment is where we can transmute and grow our abilities to observe and respond with awareness and with our best purpose at heart..

It’s beautiful really, although admittedly so painful that the ego sends us into a story of fighting or flying for survival.
You’ve recognized precisely the circumstances which for YOU evoke this conditioned pattern. One of Your Souls Patterns, if you will. This Fear response is the key moment, the context is the child’s story.
So now you can DISCERN this Outer/Inner Pattern....you become AWARE that your judgement of emotional intelligence value over intellect is where your conflict begins.
This is the moment where your alignment of consciousness, your frequency resonance....becomes disturbed.
So it does become simple then to break the pattern dissolve it, by choosing ...not fear...love (as I choose to see it) is what is real.
With that choice, it brings our bodily felt emotion, which is our resonant frequency, along with, in harmonic harmony perhaps, our intellect‘s resonant frequency to Align us, fully. All energy Centers responding in harmony..
As Above So Below.
As Inward,So Outward.

I truly hope I have conveyed this in a manner that makes my message available to be received as I have intended it

Hello @Amelopsis Shakti , welcome to the forum. I notice that this is your first post so you are invited to write an introduction post in the Newbies section to tell us a bit about yourself and how you found your way here.

 

[Menna]

Is a souls pattern as you say it the lesson we contemplate we have to learn in 5D (contemplation density) before we reincarnate.
In this instance it would be not to let my emotional center bully my intellectual and also physical?

The emotional self, often psychoanalytically termed the unconscious or subconscious self (depending on how you look at it), is socially conditioned to work on a basis of Eros (ἔρως). It has, much like the physical body, muscles that should be developed. As much as one would train one's body or one's mind, one should be able to train one's emotional self, in order to fully integrate these complex aspects within.

Is there a book you recommend for what you wrote?

 

[ephemerality]

Is there a book you recommend for what you wrote?

Check the following topic I made in regards to your question: Knowledge Starter Pack