Special forces raid my bed

[no-mans-land]

Sounds like a rather crap experience. (Understatement).

Theres no reason to think you were being targeted though imo.
I have noticed in the self proclaimed 'awakened' community, that alot of people hate the police.
They do alot of good work aswell, and enforce alot of laws that are needed.
They do alot of dirty work, and deal with some genuinely disgusting people, so they have to take harsh measures at times.
No point walking in blowing kisses to someone who you think could be carrying is there?! :)

Yes, this was the exact same words my boss told me when I am told him this story today. He is glad that some "hard guys" out there dealing with the "bad guys" out there.

But there was this little thing in the morning, as I was driving to work. It was foggy, wet mirrors, unclear sight and a cyclist was on the other side of the road. As I past by, a red flash light appeared in my rear mirror and for a short moment I got really frightened. A short shock that felt like something is burning a hole in my chest. A simple cyclist with flashing backlights, normally nothing worth of a second look, but now something is different. Maybe collateral damage?

I'm really sorry you've had to go through this too no-man's-land. Unfortunately, I haven't read more than the intro to the book "In an Unspoken Voice" except for the introduction where he talks about when he was lying on the ground, after being hit by a car, he started to shiver and shake and he just went with the experience and realized at the time that his body was dealing with the trauma and with the huge adrenaline surge and in a way, releasing the shock of his experience. That, and the fact that a nurse or doctor (can't remember exactly) held him and he felt safe as he experienced it. Try and get back to bed and as the others have suggested, do the pipe breathing and the Prayer of the Soul to recreate the feeling of safety and let whatever happens, happen. Sleep will come eventually and remember you're not alone. I will be doing the POTS and sending my thoughts your way now.
Don Genaro

Good point. That quote can be found here in the In An Unspoken Voice thread.
It may be you need to process the trauma in order to sleep, or it may be you need positive disassociation in order to do so (and then process the trauma later).

I read that book also, and yes, besides the terror of the situation, it was very interesting to notice how the body reacts to it. It was obviously that "fight or flight" was impossible and so every resistance died away. I even experienced slight difficulties to speak clearly. The fact that little incidences now provoke overreactions (red flashing lights) clearly shows that something is up and need to get solved. I also experienced out of the blue a sudden increase of my heartbeat and blood pressure several times over the day and a tendency to get stuck in though loops about what happend that evening.

What a shocking experience you had no_man's_land . Nice advice was already given. If needed see your favorite movie or call friends and talk to them.

Why you ? - IMHO It could be any body. We are just numbers here in the context of profiling technologies they use and video spying they do and credit card (if you have used) and travel information they had at their finger tips and their dumb mindset of "Just follow the order" .

May be your recent travel along with crappy video pictures of you might have made you suspect, when they are looking for some body. After relaxing a bit, better to be cautious and watchful. Don't mean to be scary. Just vigilant.

Today I walked to the police station in my town and asked what happend. The only answer was, that such an event was recorded and it was legal. Here in Germany we have something what is called "Gefahr im Verzug" or "imminent danger" and this excuses every measure. I think there is no need to mention that everyone can proclaim this "imminent danger" to do whatever they want to do. But further information was not given. I don't think that there is a chance to get the information about what really caused that action and so, every possibility about what was the real cause remain plain speculation. But it's a nice hint from the universe to pay even more attention.


But there is another thing I want to share with you. Actually I think it is normal to feel anger torwards the guys who broke into your house and threaten you, isn't it? But mainly I feel that anger about myself because I was not able to act. I felt like dead sheep, total helpless confronted with that overwhelming force. I couldn't ask questions, was only able to "make nice", obey orders and wished them even a nice evening. Honestly, it feels disgusting. Over the last few weeks, through the reading of some books, a slow process developed in which some connections appeared and I saw where old traumas took root. It felt that something begins to move inside, slow, weak, but it was moving. And now, it is like a huge sledge hammer smashed that little thing. All whats left is a strange numbness.
If this was an attempt to stop a progress with some potential, it was a success (at least for the moment).

 

[RedFox]

Its possible that as you could do neither 'fight or flight' you went into immobility/'play dead' mode. This would explain being unable to speak up too.
It may be worth revisiting that part of the book, as it's probable you are stuck in that mode right now (unless you've experienced trembling yet?).

 

[Al Today]

But mainly I feel that anger about myself because I was not able to act. I felt like dead sheep, total helpless confronted with that overwhelming force. I couldn't ask questions, was only able to "make nice", obey orders and wished them even a nice evening. Honestly, it feels disgusting.

Don't be hard on yourself. I think you did well. Here is amerika, there have been a rash of arrests of people recording these uniform officers that protect and serve themselves in action in the streets. NUMEROUS times while watching the released videos, a goon would say something to the effect of "I feel threatened" or "I'm feel danger". They said that to a lady IN HER FRONT YARD just before they cuffed her and took her to the slammer. She was only recording a traffic stop in the street. These videos are all over the net.

So yeah, avoid confrontation if there is no point to be made.

 

[Alana]

no-man's-land, I don't think you need to be too harsh with yourself about how you reacted. First of all, it was a violation of your personal environment and your individual, and it took you by surprise having been in bed already. Second, we have no conscious control of how our nervous system will act to protect us in such situations. As Porges says, we should instead thank our nervous system for interjecting to protect us from such a traumatic situation. It does sound that you might be experiencing some PTSD symptoms, so do try to do as much pipe breathing as you can, and the meditation, as others suggested. Perhaps a deep tissue relaxing massage might help you too at this point. And remember we are here for you.

 

[Niall]

Melatonin, have you noticed that your reaction to this is completely at odds with others'? Might be something to reflect on.

Sounds like a rather crap experience. (Understatement).

Theres no reason to think you were being targeted though imo.

Uhm, but the fact of the matter is that he was targeted. Oh but it was just a mistake? Irrelevant, the results were the same.

I have noticed in the self proclaimed 'awakened' community, that alot of people hate the police.
They do alot of good work aswell, and enforce alot of laws that are needed.
They do alot of dirty work, and deal with some genuinely disgusting people, so they have to take harsh measures at times.
No point walking in blowing kisses to someone who you think could be carrying is there?! :)

This is exactly the sort of paramoralistic crap that is shoved down people's throats through government, media and culture. It's no different from "we torture people because they could be bad guys" and "the bomb could be ticking down."

I live in England and have never noticed this police state that alot of people claim exists.

Well then you are living in a dream world. Where were you when the riots happened??

We can say what we want here (within reason) and express what we want. There has to be limits.

Every country on this planet is a psychological dictatorship. Again, you are living in the dreamworld they created for you.

And theres millions of people world-wide viewing 'conspiracy' vids and claiming to hate the government, its paranoia to think they would target people imo. The scene is flooded with so much dis-info, its losing credibility by the day.

A fellow forumite has just been traumatised by an armed special forces raid on his home at the crack of dawn, something that should be making the hairs on ALL of our necks stand up upon hearing it, and all you can say is that people are too paranoid?? That no-man's-land is too paranoid?? Yes, in all probability someone in the chain of command made a 'mistake', but wouldn't you be just a tad paranoid if this happened to you, bearing in mind that the PTB probably have you profiled on a list of subversives somewhere for being a member of this forum?

Soon people will be so overwhelmed and flooded with BS info, they will be begging for all the 'conspiracy' speakers to shut up, so they can sit and watch eastenders with a big mac.

'People', or yourself? It rather sounds to me like it is the truth of the reality of the situation which you are unable to bear because it overwhelms you. If you do sit down to watch something tonight to take your mind off reality, I recommend that you watch V for Vendetta. It may be fictional, but the reality it portrayed is here.

(Obviously not talking about the material that is talked about on this website)

SoTT and this forum are not the sole bastions of truth. They're just virtual hangouts at the end of the day. The truth is all around you if you care to look. All the material you need is outside your door and down your street, and if you don't get to grips with reality, next time it might come knocking down your door.

 

[Gawan]

Sorry to hear that no-man's land!

Its possible that as you could do neither 'fight or flight' you went into immobility/'play dead' mode. This would explain being unable to speak up too.
It may be worth revisiting that part of the book, as it's probable you are stuck in that mode right now (unless you've experienced trembling yet?).

I experienced something similar many years back, also with police, but not as bad as no-man's-land had gone through.

But there is another thing I want to share with you. Actually I think it is normal to feel anger torwards the guys who broke into your house and threaten you, isn't it? But mainly I feel that anger about myself because I was not able to act. I felt like dead sheep, total helpless confronted with that overwhelming force. I couldn't ask questions, was only able to "make nice", obey orders and wished them even a nice evening. Honestly, it feels disgusting. Over the last few weeks, through the reading of some books, a slow process developed in which some connections appeared and I saw where old traumas took root. It felt that something begins to move inside, slow, weak, but it was moving. And now, it is like a huge sledge hammer smashed that little thing. All whats left is a strange numbness.
If this was an attempt to stop a progress with some potential, it was a success (at least for the moment).

Well, don't blame yourself for it, that you couldn't react or respond properly, it's was a very rough situation and the police is speculating on something like it, to get one when one has no chance, either very early in the morning or late at night.

Hang in there

 

[cubbex]

... but this might just be healthy paranoia.

Lol man that's not healthy paranoia, paranoia is when you are afraid without a reason, if some big gorillas get into my house kicking my door with some AK 47 in front of my face, it's completely normal to piss your pants haha.

 

[go2]

When one is looking down the barrel of a gun, it is prudent to remain calm and comply with the gunman’s orders. You responded well and the only thing I would add is that it is useful to debrief or decompress after a violent encounter by recalling and recording all details of the encounter in writing as soon as you are able. It seems to assure the psyche the event was real and prevents later flashbacks or dissociative episodes.

It does not sound as if you experienced immobilization described in The Polyvagal Theory by Stephen W. Porges. You maintained conscious control of the fight-flight vagal mechanism. I have experienced several violent encounters and was struck by the total calm, conscious response in the face of death. Later, I was terrified and shocked by what I had experienced. The recall and record exercise was recommended to me by an old man of wide experience. It seems to be effective in recovering from the trauma of violence.

I wish you well no-man’s-land, with integrating the deeper understanding of what it means to live in a violent world where death is our adviser. It is an opportunity to study the function of your parts; when the thinking, feeling and motor-instinctive functions are simultaneously aroused by such an encounter.

 

[Avala]

nml

That was really terrible experience. But if there could be good thing in that, now you will be less prone to the "less" terrible fears. This really is big shock when happens to someone for the first time.

There really is no need to feel angry at yourself or disgust. You did what was the best in the situation. In that moment you was "bad guy" for them and it would be very dangerous for you to give some resist or to even shout on them. Some time will pass until you recover from shock and stress.

Go2 gave you excellent advice. Do recapitulation of the event and don't recall it with fear that you felt at that very moment (that is the past, no reason for reliving it, be in the present moment when doing it), that can help.

No need to feel anger, or any other emotion, at the policemen. They are just doing their job, however that job could be stupid in this pathological world. And feeling anything for them could hold you longer in the state of fear and shock.

Wish you the best

 

[melatonin]

I live in England and have never noticed this police state that alot of people claim exists.

This is probably because you think the police state is only when thugs start knocking on your door, and they will probably soon, in US they don't need to any more by law, it all goes by baby steps in the end. I think this what you said is very ignorant statement, what about CCTV cameras on every 100 m, what about your airports, what about those Arabs that where shot at and put at gunpoint because police got "false" information? Don't you think it can't apply to you and rest who aren't Arabs. I agree that some cops are good, and many probably think they are doing service to community, but guess what, they aren't. You say some laws are good, and they are good because they have to give false image to population that they governments care about them and maybe what's more true because they don't want chaos that isn't caused by PTB because it's not good for business.

The CCTV cameras dont bother me. Im not a drug dealer, and i dont do anything thats harmful to anyone else.
Guess what im trying to say is that if there was no police force tommorow, would i live any differently? Nope.
So in that sense, the actual police force doesnt oppress me personally, so neither do any of the laws.

Thats different to being oppressed in other ways, by conditioning on TV for example. I dont think they will ever need to physically (by the use of police force) put people in their 'place'. The majority of folk have already been brainwashed into submission.
So i disagree - and i actually do believe that the majority of rules do exist to keep a certain amount of peace and order. (for the time being anyways).

I witnessed a guy getting killed by some drugged up loosers a few years ago, in a hit & run. I was the only person who testified. Because of that, and the CCTV footage, these scumbags were caught.
I seriously think that people have too much self importance to think that CCTV's are infringing on privacy (why would anyone want to know where they was at night? Why would they think they are that important? - thats brainwashing, right there).

 

[Finduilas495]

The CCTV cameras dont bother me. Im not a drug dealer, and i dont do anything thats harmful to anyone else.
Guess what im trying to say is that if there was no police force tommorow, would i live any differently? Nope.
So in that sense, the actual police force doesnt oppress me personally, so neither do any of the laws.

Well neither is no-man's-land, and it still happened to him. This is the whole point. They don't oppress you personally... yet. You simply don't know whether it might happen to you or not.

I know of another case in Germany with a similar story, it was a work colleague of mine who got arrested because he looked like some guy they were looking for because of a robbery.

Thats different to being oppressed in other ways, by conditioning on TV for example. I dont think they will ever need to physically (by the use of police force) put people in their 'place'. The majority of folk have already been brainwashed into submission.
So i disagree - and i actually do believe that the majority of rules do exist to keep a certain amount of peace and order. (for the time being anyways).

Well there are rules that aim at peace and order, and then there are the people who execute those rules and make them subject to interpretation. You can read about errors in judgment or plain harassment everyday. What makes you think it can't happen to you, that you're exempt in some way?

I witnessed a guy getting killed by some drugged up loosers a few years ago, in a hit & run. I was the only person who testified. Because of that, and the CCTV footage, these scumbags were caught.
I seriously think that people have too much self importance to think that CCTV's are infringing on privacy (why would anyone want to know where they was at night? Why would they think they are that important? - thats brainwashing, right there).

It's a good thing you stepped up and testified against a murderer. But to think CCTV is only used for good causes, is denial IMO.

 

[truth seeker]

The CCTV cameras dont bother me. Im not a drug dealer, and i dont do anything thats harmful to anyone else.
Guess what im trying to say is that if there was no police force tommorow, would i live any differently? Nope.
So in that sense, the actual police force doesnt oppress me personally, so neither do any of the laws.

So as long as the police don't oppress you personally, what happens to others is okay?

Thats different to being oppressed in other ways, by conditioning on TV for example. I dont think they will ever need to physically (by the use of police force) put people in their 'place'. The majority of folk have already been brainwashed into submission.
So i disagree - and i actually do believe that the majority of rules do exist to keep a certain amount of peace and order. (for the time being anyways).

Maybe the 'majority of rules exist' to keep those who are inclined to follow such rules in place? From what I see, the ones who are inclined to ignore such rules do as they please. Interestingly enough, the ones who follow the rules tend not to need them as they usually have a conscience that 'keeps them in line'.

I witnessed a guy getting killed by some drugged up loosers a few years ago, in a hit & run. I was the only person who testified. Because of that, and the CCTV footage, these scumbags were caught.
I seriously think that people have too much self importance to think that CCTV's are infringing on privacy (why would anyone want to know where they was at night? Why would they think they are that important? - thats brainwashing, right there).

How would you feel if someone followed you around constantly watching you? Sure, you might think at first that you were okay with it but perhaps after a while, it might start to bother you somewhat. What if this person followed you into the bathroom? What if they came up to you and checked your pockets?

One of the things that CCTV cameras accomplishes is acquiescence. They groom people to accept the next, planned level of personal invasion. As people get used to each new phase, they are taught to get used to the next one. So it doesn't begin and end with CCTV.

Just curious, have you ever worked for or know someone who works for the military or a paramilitary organization as you seem to be identified with it?

 

[aragorn]

I'm very sorry to hear about your experience, no-man's land! This is a good reminder of how these things can happen to anyone, nobody is a nobody. It's disgusting, but hardly surprising, that they don't offer any explanation.

Hope you can do some good EE-breathing, maybe punch a bag or something, body work, and get this out of your system. A thing like this must be pretty traumatizing.

 

[kenlee]

The CCTV cameras dont bother me. Im not a drug dealer, and i dont do anything thats harmful to anyone else.
Guess what im trying to say is that if there was no police force tommorow, would i live any differently? Nope.
So in that sense, the actual police force doesnt oppress me personally, so neither do any of the laws.

Well I think the problem here is that when you say "i dont do anything that's harmful to anyone else," it's open to an interpretation by the psychopaths in power who are exclusively out for their own interest and which goes far, far beyond the common sense understanding of what "harmful to anyone else" means. "Harmful to anyone else" really means what is only harmful to them and the laws that are made will reflect this.

Bottom line is that the psychopathic and authoritarian types now run the governments and our lives, and there are now loads of these authoritarian types who are getting those few jobs that are available since these types thrive in this type of system, and they are getting the jobs at all levels of the job market from the highest to the lowest. You'll literally be running through a gauntlet of authoritarianism just living your day to day life.

It's a psychopathic machine that only serves itself through oppression waging war on all humanity by way of deception at the expense of the good will of normal people whose only main fault is basically just falling into a state of delusion of wishful thinking and falsely hoping that these psychopathic types who are our "leaders" are really looking out for our best interests.

In that context I think police forces are now there to only to protect THAT system even though there still may be an appearance that they are there protecting the people with a never ending end to all these insane "laws" that continue to be made. Observe how people act in proximity to a cop (who basically now represents this system) these days. I noticed (here in the U.S.) that people's postures assume a subservient stance, as if by conditioned reflex. Their postures become subservient (by reflex), then they identify with the posture and then THEY become subservient. Then anything the authority figure says, no matter how bizarre, will be "right" because the people have already been defeated in both body, mind and spirit even before the authority figure said anything.

So let's say that you are (or feel) that you are personally not oppressed. But observe how the mass mind is being oppressed with all the draconian laws that continue to be made to "protect" them. Then, in my view, the wave of oppression that spreads over the group mind will sooner or latter directly affect your life (and mind) since you are a part of society, even though you might not notice it's affects to any great degree (yet).

 

[mkrnhr]

First they came for the communists,
and I didn't speak out because I wasn't a communist.

Then they came for the trade unionists,
and I didn't speak out because I wasn't a trade unionist.

Then they came for the Jews,
and I didn't speak out because I wasn't a Jew.

Then they came for me
and there was no one left to speak out for me.

The PTB counts on the slave mentality of submitting to the authority so they do whatever they want. Considering the "as above as below" context, and the fact that our external lives are reflection/symbols of our internal lives, if one submits to the STS aspect of reality in here, he/she also submits on more subtil levels. One common trait of the slave mentality is "if doesn't bother me personally, so I don't care about what happens to others". Sheep also feel protected in their enclosure, and yet a few of them want to be free and alive. Police is but one aspect of the control system, but submitting to the police may be symbolic of submission to the whole control system.