The subtle art of not giving a f... - Mark Manson

Marina9

Marina9

The Living Force
FOTCM Member
The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life

https://www.amazon.com.mx/Subtle-Art-Not-Giving-Counterintuitive-ebook/dp/B019MMUA8S

First of all, I know the title is a bit agressive and when I first saw it I thought it was one of this books about actually not caring about things and living life in the moment or something like that hehe. I was hesitant to purchase it but it kept on appearing in my recommended list in Kindle, so I said why not?

I have been listening to it since yesterday and im about to finish it. I'm in chapter 8 so far and thought some of you might like it :) It's a very easy read or listen in my case, and in some aspects it has a relationship with things we have been discussing about here in the forum, more related to Jordan Peterson. The author even mentions Dabrowski at some point!

So the summary from Goodreads goes like this:

In this generation-defining self-help guide, a superstar blogger cuts through the crap to show us how to stop trying to be "positive" all the time so that we can truly become better, happier people.

For decades, we’ve been told that positive thinking is the key to a happy, rich life. "F**k positivity," Mark Manson says. "Let’s be honest, shit is f**ked and we have to live with it." In his wildly popular Internet blog, Mason doesn’t sugarcoat or equivocate. He tells it like it is—a dose of raw, refreshing, honest truth that is sorely lacking today. The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k is his antidote to the coddling, let’s-all-feel-good mindset that has infected American society and spoiled a generation, rewarding them with gold medals just for showing up.

Manson makes the argument, backed both by academic research and well-timed poop jokes, that improving our lives hinges not on our ability to turn lemons into lemonade, but on learning to stomach lemons better. Human beings are flawed and limited—"not everybody can be extraordinary, there are winners and losers in society, and some of it is not fair or your fault." Manson advises us to get to know our limitations and accept them. Once we embrace our fears, faults, and uncertainties, once we stop running and avoiding and start confronting painful truths, we can begin to find the courage, perseverance, honesty, responsibility, curiosity, and forgiveness we seek.

There are only so many things we can give a f**k about so we need to figure out which ones really matter, Manson makes clear. While money is nice, caring about what you do with your life is better, because true wealth is about experience. A much-needed grab-you-by-the-shoulders-and-look-you-in-the-eye moment of real-talk, filled with entertaining stories and profane, ruthless humor, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k is a refreshing slap for a generation to help them lead contented, grounded lives.
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And one of the quotes that I really liked:

"Who you are is defined by what you are willing to struggle for."

I did relate it in some way to JP's very famous: "Life is suffering, so get your act together!"

All in all I thought it is a good book to listen to while on your commute or free time, as I said it's very easy to understand and in my case it gave me the giggles also.


https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?...=a.100363943474299.518.100005020800647&type=3
 
Read it! Excellent book. :thup:

Don't worry, he stops the potty mouth stuff pretty quickly once the book gets going.
 
Scottie said:
Read it! Excellent book. :thup:

Don't worry, he stops the potty mouth stuff pretty quickly once the book gets going.
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Hehe yes!

I was looking more into his talks and videos and i'll share here some with you guys that I found interesting:

In this one he talks about meaning, and the lack of meaning there is now in our society and how this has created an epidemic of depression, anxiety, eating disorders, etc,.


Another topic we hear a lot about, procrastination:


Action isn’t just the effect of motivation, but also the cause of it.
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Article from his blog: The "Do Something" Principle

About passion and purpose: "The meaning is in the work..."


And here is another one, a bit lenghty but he talks more about the book, his life and so on.


All in all IMO, he has some good points :-)
 
Never picked up this one but I did read 'Models' a while back and found it to be refreshing.

Among a whole bunch of toxic gurus and authors trying to fill the gaping hole in western society that is the lack of positive masculinity and honest male advice, I found Manson to be more psychologically normal and real than many others.

Most of his stuff is largely applicable to both sexes as well.
 
I've seen him around here and there and heard his book is doing pretty well. Thanks for the thread, Marina and everyone. I'll look into it.
 
truth seeker said:
I've seen him around here and there and heard his book is doing pretty well. Thanks for the thread, Marina and everyone. I'll look into it.
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You are welcome truth seeker 😄 I just finished it and oh boy, the last chapter was very good. Also i did like a lot the narrators voice, since the book has a lot of stories and so on the guy narrating it did a great job conveying Manson's message.

Hope you guys enjoy it!
 
Thanks Marina, I have seen it on my kindle/audible threads too...I thought as you did, considering the title, but seems it is worth a look/listen, so thanks for the recommendation, I will add it to the wishlist :)
 
987baz said:
Thanks Marina, I have seen it on my kindle/audible threads too...I thought as you did, considering the title, but seems it is worth a look/listen, so thanks for the recommendation, I will add it to the wishlist :)
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I thought about this "don't judge a book by it's cover" saying hehe. I would totally recommend the audiobook it goes by really quick like if you were having a conversation with the narrator in some sense. And also visiting his blog, he's got some good articles in there. If you pay 4$ USD for a subscritpion you get a ton of material, like courses for example.

Anywho, maybe when more people have read it we can all discuss about it :)
 
I read some of his blog posts a while back. I think he was mentioned on the forum, SOTT, or FB. One of his posts was talking about finding what you love to do. And he said that whatever you are already doing is what you love to do. It should be a no-brainer. Something to that effect. I thought that was interesting and it sounded like something the C's said like, "Do what is effortless."

I've been thinking of getting some audiobooks to listen to during my commute. Maybe Jordan Peterson, Healing Developmental Trauma, and this book.
 
3DStudent said:
One of his posts was talking about finding what you love to do. And he said that whatever you are already doing is what you love to do.
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I thought the chapter on the 'The Value of Suffering' was excellent promoting, as it does, the valuable distinction between the question of 'Why am I suffering - for what purpose?' versus the common response of 'How do I stop suffering?', also his definition on what self improvement is really about -

'...prioritizing better values, choosing better things to give a f&ck about. Because when you give better f&cks, you get better problems.'

But that being said, every chapter is packed with earthy gems :-)

Cheers

J
 
Here are the six habits discussed in the article above:

Accepting conflict can't always be resolved
Accepting attraction to other people but not suppressing or acting on them
Being willing to end it
Not being afraid f hurting your partner's feeling
Spending time apart
Accepting your partner's flaws
 
It's actually a pretty good article stating some things that people nowadays don't really think about, and exposing those things that most people lie to themselves about. One of the most basic and important is COMMUNICATION. You can't have a real relationship without that, and to the greatest extent possible:

If I feel smothered and need more time alone, I need to be capable of saying that without blaming her and she needs to be capable of hearing it without blaming me, despite the unpleasant feelings it may cause. If she feels that I’m cold and unresponsive to her, she needs to be capable of saying it without blaming me and I need to be capable of hearing it without blaming her, despite the unpleasant feelings it may generate.
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This approach applies to everything.
 
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