I have been thinking about this for a little while, and a thought occurred to me that I wanted to share.
On the one hand, naming something is actually truly powerful, like when you receive a diagnosis and you finally know what's been bothering you, however if you only receive it, not as a way to identify something to work on and change but simply as a way to name it, it actually works like a jail, it condemns you to a fate dictated by whatever the concept is.
And it strikes me that in this case, the whole Incel idea is designed precisely as such, it's a term that is supposed to mean something specific but it actually means nothing, it's designed to make men afraid of ever finding themselves in a position where they're not having any intimate interaction.
But, It misses the entire point of being single and not sleeping around, sometimes it's healthy, sometimes necessary, sometimes it is adequate and the only consequence of poor choices or awful behavior to push everyone away. As if not being sexually active was somehow a mistake, when in fact being able to live a life that isn't ruled by sexual drives is one measure of maturity.
But also, once you decide to go back out into the dating scene, the urgency of not being an incel, actually creates a rush that will more than likely result in the wrong attitude about intimacy and sex.
So, this is perhaps all by design.