How to deal with Fear?

[Risen]

Brunauld, you wrote it well, I just didn't reply well. I meant if you can not find the cause and you assume it is an attack or beaming, can you still just let yourself feel this unknown fear and accept it without identifying and let it go?

 

[Windmill knight]

[...]

But it's all not that easy. We do have imagination, we can "see" (sometimes accurately, sometimes not) upcoming danger. How not to feed fear? There are a few things you can do, I think. First off, you can ask yourself how accurate your reading instrument is, and work on tuning it in (best, with the network's help). Next, try to live in the present. What can you do? Thinking about yourself only doesn't help much. But when you shift your focus (stop internal consideration) and begin to think of what you can do for OTHERS, things usually change dramatically. That's the best way I know to counterbalance fear, or negative emotions in general.

[...]

Thanks PoB, that was a really insightful post. I was going to write something similar to the above. Sometimes, when I'm stuck thinking about a situation that provokes fear, it can help to write out the facts or what is known, trying as best as I can to eliminate any imaginary or hypothetical parts to the fear. Sometimes I just see a bunch of contradictory statements, which can be an interesting exercise to sort through. Other times just writing out the facts can sometimes lead to a solution of whatever problem/fear I'm stuck on. Of course, if this process still doesn't work, and I'm still stuck, consulting with a network becomes necessary. ;)

I'd like to add that fear, as an instinctive reaction, has positive potential but we need to do something productive about it. I am at the moment reading Women Who Run with the Wolves (I know, it has been on my 'to read' list for too long) and I'm finding it inspirational to recover the positive aspects of our instinctive nature. You know, Wild Ways and all that.

 

[cubbex]

Brunauld, you wrote it well, I just didn't reply well. I meant if you can not find the cause and you assume it is an attack or beaming, can you still just let yourself feel this unknown fear and accept it without identifying and let it go?

If you are being attacked or are beamed (that I can't really remember if I had experienced this fear beaming) I thing in both cases the only way is to use what protect us all the time, knowledge, and maybe we need time to get that knowledge, patience to see the roots and patience to apply something against it. So of course if you can't find the root, a real reason to feel fear, so maybe to accept the fear is not a good idea, it may be a little strange of having fear just because that little dude wants to appear in your head. The important thing is to not let change our being in a negative way because of the fear, because it is a deffensive mechanism, and maybe the secret of the negative (that are negative because of their effect on our behavior) emotions is to use them in a productive way as the post of above tells.

Long ago I had the fear of being killed by lizzards as a past poster (Pepperfritz I think so), or by an accident, by life itself, and I mean, I was crazy how may I get killed by anything that surrounds me? So I didn't care, the fear was there but I got an attitude of "Try hard baby! got me if you can". There was no reason, even reading the cs response that the case of her was a particular case, I was believing that something like that would happen to me, and I don't want to die, but I don't want to fear life, ironically, all my life.

Edit: Quote, spells (god's sake I always misspell)

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Actualy I didn't see your first post on the thread opossum, I don't really see as bad to have fear about your situation, but are you sure that is your fear what is causing a problem? maybe you just need to relax and patience to solve it, if you avoid your fear you would harm yourself.

 

[go2]

A heart transmutation maybe?
Maybe it just wants to pour out of your heart, if you do EE maybe is a repressed feeling. What I do with my fear or similar emotions is not to avoid them, but to find the root of it what thing it causes my fear, and let heart be absorbed my the feeling, kind maintaining it there, but no manifesting it in my mind or behavior, just let my heart feel the fear. Then it just go away by magic.

Does this work if one cannot find the root of it? Just letting the heart feel it without any analyses of it? I have not tried this. If I don't know the root cause it seems to make me more afraid and I try to fight it, which I see is pointless.

Question for you Opossum, and everyone here- above you said that you feel fear in your heart. I personally feel fear in my solar plexus ( navel area). If I focus on it and deem there is no immediate threat it will subside. Do you feel fear where your heart actually is? I am only asking because I notice the difference of location here.

I am reading Polyvagal Theory by Porges and it is my understanding from the reading that the solar plexus vagal wiring is unmyelinated and a phylogenetically older system of survival meant to detect and evade predators in real time. It is a heritage of the reptilian neural system. The heart vagal connection is myelinated and centered in the detection of threat within the self-other relationship which is our mammalian heritage.

I recently experienced fear arousal of both the solar plexus and heart systems, when a predatory individual tried to take me hostage in a covert campaign of harassment in a recovery group. POB's post above is an accurate description of fear experienced as the result of being trapped without running away or beating him with a stick. It required social engagement, described in Levine's quotes in POB's post and an aim to protect myself and the group by engaging in prolonged effort to bring the bully before group conscience. The group voted it was not responsible for banning this member, however I engaged and circumscribed the individual's harassing behavior and it prepared the ground for future action if necessary. It was scary to stand my ground, when it is easier to run.

So, when we have fear of the future collapse of social, political and economic institutions or even natural cataclysms it is a real possibility and preparation of our inner state of being and to a lessor extent, external preparedness is the antidote to fear. When we honor the instinctive-motor arousal, we will act in the internal and the external worlds. I think feeling the fear is a necessary engagement of the emotional center, but it is insufficient to expect fear to evaporate without response of all three functions of the feeling, thinking, and instinctive-motor centers, guided by aim. At least that is how I understand my experience of the previous week.

Edit: As Castanada said, when we learn to face the petty tyrants in our lives, we can face the unknown. It is training the body, the feelings and the mind to obey the master.

 

[Risen]

Question for you Opossum, and everyone here- above you said that you feel fear in your heart. I personally feel fear in my solar plexus ( navel area). If I focus on it and deem there is no immediate threat it will subside. Do you feel fear where your heart actually is? I am only asking because I notice the difference of location here.

Sorry EmraldHope, I missed this before. I don't usually feel this kind of fear in my heart. This unidentifiable fear is felt in the solar plexus and it comes all of a sudden out of nowhere and feels like kind of a punch in the stomach. When I am aware of where the fear is coming from, if there is imminent danger, even if it is an obvious attack in person, it feels like a stab in the heart.

 

[Possibility of Being]

I'd like to add that fear, as an instinctive reaction, has positive potential but we need to do something productive about it. I am at the moment reading Women Who Run with the Wolves (I know, it has been on my 'to read' list for too long) and I'm finding it inspirational to recover the positive aspects of our instinctive nature. You know, Wild Ways and all that.

That's great that you mentioned about "an instinctive reaction" here. It helps me to clarify what bothered me but couldn't put my finger on. My point is, though I can be off, that we should make a clear distinction between instinctive fear and what I'd call "learned" or imposed fear, and not to talk about both at once.

Leo wrote in his initial post, "I have noticed recently that some members of this forum are caught up in the fear mongering of the PTB" and I think (correct me Leo if I'm wrong) that it was meant to be kind of continuation of his post in the other thread What you think about June 26 2011.

When you think of it, it really doesn't happen often in our everyday life that we are being faced with some real danger that triggers our instinctive fear and we don't know how to or can't deal with it. What seems to be a problem though, is fear of future events, imaginary fear, fear "out of blue", predator's fear that we identify with, fear evoked by former traumas; or just a tendency to seek and wind up one's fear or susceptibility to fear mongering. Sometimes such fear can even appear due to beaming or influences coming from 4D STS, etc. These are the kinds of fear we far not always know how to deal with. And such fear is all but "life savior" or a reaction of the moving center. It's usually an energy stolen from one center by another; it's much more like Gurdjieff's kundabuffer organ - a hindrance, that protects us from seeing, objective thinking, growing, and interacting with others in a right way.

At least that's how I see it, FWIW.

--
Edit: clarity

 

[Risen]

What seems to be a problem though, is fear of future events, imaginary fear, fear "out of blue", predator's fear that we identify with, fear evoked by former traumas; or just a tendency to seek and wind up one's fear or susceptibility to fear mongering. Sometimes such fear can even appear due to beaming or influences coming from 4D STS, etc. These are the kinds of fear we far not always know how to deal with. And such fear is all but "life savior" or a reaction of the moving center. It's usually an energy stolen from one center by another; it's much more like Gurdjieff's kundabuffer organ - a hindrance, that protects us from seeing, objective thinking, growing, and interacting with others in a right way.

Thanks for this paragraph. A light bulb went off in my head when I read this.

 

[Windmill knight]

I'd like to add that fear, as an instinctive reaction, has positive potential but we need to do something productive about it. I am at the moment reading Women Who Run with the Wolves (I know, it has been on my 'to read' list for too long) and I'm finding it inspirational to recover the positive aspects of our instinctive nature. You know, Wild Ways and all that.

That's great that you mentioned about "an instinctive reaction" here. It helps me to clarify what bothered me but couldn't put my finger on. My point is, though I can be off, that we should make a clear distinction between instinctive fear and what I'd call "learned" or imposed fear, and not to talk about both at once.

Leo wrote in his initial post, "I have noticed recently that some members of this forum are caught up in the fear mongering of the PTB" and I think (correct me Leo if I'm wrong) that it was meant to be kind of continuation of his post in the other thread What you think about June 26 2011.

That makes sense PofB, thanks. Actually, I hadn't made the connection with the June 26th thread (having read only the first half), which clearly had a lot of imagined fear going on, or energy stolen from one center by another, as you put it.

 

[Guardian]

When I'm afraid, I calm my mind and tell myself "It's just a meat suit, if I kill it, I can get another one...and it won't be nearly as old and wrinkly as this one"

Might sound kinda silly, but it really does work for me when my spirit wants to go in one direction and my feet want to go in the other.

 

[Gimpy]

There's a book by Gavin de Becker called "The Gift of Fear", that I used to give to people years ago.

In it, the author discuses the difference between true fear, and baseless anxiety or false fears, even reactionary fear that is more like hysteria. (And I do still have this book, but its buried in the last place I haven't cleaned in the library. Its worth reading.)

What I see all the time in the news and other media is baseless/false fear mongering, geared to causing widespread anxiety.

True fear will move your feet and force you to make choices that at the moment may not make any sense, but those choices will save your life. The book is full of examples of that nature, all of them life threatening instants in which the victim acted and managed to escape death.

I found it an invaluable book in learning how to deal with past traumas and spotting real predators...the actual cause of true fear.

It should still be on amazon, I don't think its gone out of print. When I find it, I'll see if posting an excerpt or two is allowed. It might be one of those copyright things.

 

[go2]

I'd like to add that fear, as an instinctive reaction, has positive potential but we need to do something productive about it. I am at the moment reading Women Who Run with the Wolves (I know, it has been on my 'to read' list for too long) and I'm finding it inspirational to recover the positive aspects of our instinctive nature. You know, Wild Ways and all that.

That's great that you mentioned about "an instinctive reaction" here. It helps me to clarify what bothered me but couldn't put my finger on. My point is, though I can be off, that we should make a clear distinction between instinctive fear and what I'd call "learned" or imposed fear, and not to talk about both at once.

...........

Doesn't all fear trigger the same instinctive-motor polyvagal fight or flight response? When I hear residents of Seattle are breathing ten hot particles of Fukashima radiation per day and I experience fear; is this instinctive or learned? How do I determine whether a fear is instinctive or learned? I don't see the value of your distinction, POB. It might be useful to distinguish whether the triggering data is based on old programs that distort the truth of the thinking and feeling centers evaluation of the data. Many fears are based on false programming of the emotional or thinking centers or mistaking new data for old. Is this what you mean by a learned fear?

 

[cubbex]

Maybe is both, a learned fear an instinctive, because by instinct you fear what you know harms yourself.

 

[KTC]

Fear is both stored and processed within the psoas, a muscle that grows out of the spine and grows into the top of the femur (leg).
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psoas_major_muscle
Ask a physiotherapist and he/she will tell you that the psoas is merely a hip flexor. But, this amazing organ is much more than that. As a Pilates practitioner the following is something I share with some clients, often with very positive results.
The psoas is your 'fight or flight' muscle. In times of distress, physical trauma or emotional anxiety, your psoas will respond. And if not dealt with, cause all sorts of issues including back pain, stomach discomfort, breathing difficulties, nausea, constipation. Notice how these are all effects felt during periods of fear/anxiety/distress.
I have found that the pipe breathing definitely helps release my psoas. Having worked with it personally for a couple of years I can now identify when it is reactive. Also, there is another technique that is very useful and can be incorporated into your EE schedule. Its called the Constructive Rest Position.

Simply lay on your back with your knees bent, feet flat on the floor, arms resting at your sides or on your belly. Your spine needs to be in alignment (remember psoas grows out of your spine so it needs to be in a neutral position) so you may fold a towel and pop it under your head but avoid chocking your head up too high with a pillow (unless you are pregnant and then you can use a couple of pillows to be in a semi seated position). I suggest gently holding a ball between your knees so they stay in line with your hips. Alternatively you can lay on your back with your legs on a chair so that they are at a 90 degree angle. Position is important.

THe idea is to lay here and relax for about 15-20 minutes (perfect to do your pipe breathing). Some sensations that you may feel are:

Hips become heavy
legs sink deeper into hip sockets
front of legs (quads) relax
lumbar region melts into the floor
rib cage softens
shoulders relax
you cry

All of the above are signs that your psoas has started to release. I sometimes see a few tears at the studio when we do psoas work. We are a society of highly strung, stressed out, overworked, over stimulated, scared people. No wonder our body is constantly in fight or flight mode.. add on some of the information we are exposed to and the discussions we take part in on this forum, the books we read and the possible reality we are facing!!

A good website that I refer clients to is http://www.coreawareness.com/ The auther, Liz Koch has studied the psoas for a good many years and has all sorts of great information/releasing techniques available.

 

[Gawan]

Fear as Mouravieff explained is a reaction of the moving center (so not really an emotion), which could get explained with mobilization as Purges (Polyvagal theory) discussed it: fight or flight. The sympathetic nervous system provides energy for this mobilization and fear is a survival signal. In light of Purges, we cannot be able to think clearly cause our main energy is drained for muscles and not the thinking part, which is active when we are relaxed.

Yes and now? As I understand the concept, there is NO fear IF and as long one can fight or flee - you just fight or run away. Fear comes with immobilization, especially when prolonged. Levine writes:

It can be said that the experience of fear derives from the primitive responses to threat where escape is thwarted (i.e., in some way—actual or perceived—prevented or conflicted).' Contrary to what you might expect, when one's primary responses of fight-or-flight (or other protective actions) are executed freely, one does not necessarily experience fear, but rather the pure and powerful, primary sensations of fighting or fleeing. Recall, the response to threat involves an initial mobilization to fight or flee. It is only when that response fails that it "defaults" to one's freezing or being "scared stiff" or to collapsing helplessly.

Thanks PoB for further data input.

It is important to have fear, that our stress responses really respond, but it is important that we react on real -fear/stress- motives and that is crux imo, to decipher what is a real threat and what not.

This type of fear we talk about here is fed by imagination. You [general "you"] imagine some dark, dangerous future and wind up your fear. The problem is, there is no imminent threat to your existence, there is nothing to fight with or flee from. The body and mind get confused, trapped with an impossible task - to deal with an enemy that isn't there. As an old saying goes, that's like paying interests of a credit not taking yet.

That's the question imo, if the body still reacts to the imagination with the same responses. What comes to my mind, are movies and computer games, which is also somehow imagination and not real, nontheless the -brain- takes it for real and the body shows reactions.

from this article:

Your brain treats items and goods in the video game world as if they are real. Because they are.

But it's all not that easy. We do have imagination, we can "see" (sometimes accurately, sometimes not) upcoming danger. How not to feed fear? There are a few things you can do, I think. First off, you can ask yourself how accurate your reading instrument is, and work on tuning it in (best, with the network's help). Next, try to live in the present. What can you do? Thinking about yourself only doesn't help much. But when you shift your focus (stop internal consideration) and begin to think of what you can do for OTHERS, things usually change dramatically. That's the best way I know to counterbalance fear, or negative emotions in general.

I totally agree. To make a reality check for example.

 

[knowledge_of_self]

This is a very interesting topic, and a bit 'synchronis' for me because I just watched Green Lantern this weekend and the plot of that movie was basically fear vs. will.

I used to be a very fearful person before I was introduced to this site. One of my biggest fears was the idea of death and what life after death would be like. The idea of nothingness scared me silly. But when I learned about re-incarnation I wasn't so afraid anymore.

I think of it like this, when you're a kid you're scared of horror movies because you perceive it as 'real'. But when you find out about the backstage process, suddenly you feel silly for being scared of a bunch of fake objects. Your knowledge base expands and fear subsides.

So for me, knowledge input and networking has been the main forces to strengthen my will against fear.