Let me just update here, cause i think i'm on to something. I realized that because of the way i've been changing over the years, like humans do, i needed a different approach. I kept trying
the same old crap over and over again
I have some tab editing software and i had nearly forgotten about it, i wouldn't remember if i didn't give guitar lessons. But a while ago i started just, without thinking, putting down rythms and notes
in the tab editor, not really caring one bit if i came up with anything.
The cool part is, I did come up with something. The software takes to time to use, but it helps me remember what i write (i have a short term memory issue it seems) and it temporarily
takes the stress off of having to play it right away. I'm so dumb, i just needed a visual/audio aid!! and i can hear how it sounds right away, so that's good.
I think that what's really different about now from a couple years ago, i seem to be a more mentally centered sort of person, my mind wants to keep track of everything, and i can't do that
without software in front of me it seems. a bit of a handicap, but if that's what it takes. :) this might even get me to play everyday again.
plus, since i don't really need a guitar to hear the music, i can smoke!