how to get un-bored?

[cholas]

Fact of the matter is, i finally realize, I just ain't talented in that area.

Uhh.....

I'm not so sure if talent is the issue here, abstract, as you obviously have more than enough.

I've been observing lots of folks playing music of late and some gain tremendous energy and some don't, maybe even lose energy.

Not real sure why, but the 'being played by the music' idea comes to my mind. And somewhere back, ApproachingInfinity mentioned using the full range of emotional expression and the likely personal need for it.

Just a thought. :)

 

[abstract]

I'm not so sure if talent is the issue here, abstract, as you obviously have more than enough.

I'd love to agree with you but I see more and more that my internally narcissistic tendencies were just convincing me that I was a good musician.

I'm not trying to gain sympathy, that's just what I think.

I'll be honest here. I've never ever played just for personal enjoyment. All my incentives for playing have been related to some anticipated future reward.

So i've tried and tried and I just don't think I can do it anymore. I don't know what else to say. I look at my gear and I hate the fact that I even own it.

I've given and given and given to the guitar, to music, to bands, i've given time, energy, loads of money, and what do I have to show for it?

In all honesty I have nothing to show for it. Just memories of shattered illusions, that's all.

 

[cholas]

Sounds like you might be right then, abstract. Maybe just drop it......for now anyway.

Music is a huge part of my life, so maybe I was just doing some projecting. I apologize if that's the case.

FWIW, I like what you've created.

 

[Laura]

Keep following your nose and you will find what really excites you. Based on just limited observation, it seems to be partly related to discovery of Truth?

 

[Bidoche]

Getting bored happens to all of us. I was feeling that way yesterday, so I went off to my favorite music store and picked up some NEW STRINGS - a small investment, but way good at stopping the boredom. If in your case, that's not enough, try getting an effects pedal (like a looper) - this could open up a myriad of possibilities for future creativity. I hope this helps. Being abstract is what it's all about, right? :O

 

[thevenusian]

A few thoughts on your current observations.

What you are expressing about your relationship to playing & making music sounds like growth. You are no longer satisfied with what you have been doing or your motivations for doing it. Time for a change.

I don't think all the time and effort you've put into developing your chops is a waste. You obviously, at least from what I have seen and heard, have ability. And it took you much effort and practice to get that. It didn't happen overnight. No matter what your motivations were, you have that experience to draw from. You worked at it persistently, kept focused on it, and acquired the skills as a result. It takes a certain discipline to do that, and not everyone has that quality.

I think you could apply that to 'whatever excites you', as Laura said, and get similar results in almost anything. Maybe it is music, maybe something else, but it likely won't be the same as what you have already done.

 

[abstract]

Based on just limited observation, it seems to be partly related to discovery of Truth?

About half of it was that all by itself, the rest was all the other reasons i've thrown out there.

try getting an effects pedal (like a looper) - this could open up a myriad of possibilities for future creativity

Effects, I have been there, done that. wah wah's, flanger, chorus, reverb, delay, echo, compression, modulation, i've been through all that stuff.

Not that i'm spitting on your idea but I feel like i have had a taste of just about everything. It's been this whole flipping cycle of me trying something new

and going "what am I doing this for???!"

Because what really got me down was when I realized i just wasn't gonna be able to make a career out of music for myself, whether its being in the band, engineering records,

writing, and all the other stuff you can do for a musical career, I can't see myself doing any of those things because of how god-awful the music industry is.

I even ignored my regular schoolwork just to have more time to practice, I was so sure i could get into doing something with music after high school, i was SO SURE!

But life happens.

I used to identify with the guitar. I used to feel like nothing and no one without it. I used to pay so much attention to them! Clean them, change the strings all the time,

make constant adjustments, but now i just let them sit around. I even left one of them in the back of my truck when it was cold, the neck got a huge crack down the middle,

making it unplayable, but i DID NOT CARE. A couple/few years ago i might have gotten really, really upset.

 

[cholas]

I was so sure i could get into doing something with music after high school, i was SO SURE!

So there is maybe a blockage of sorts. I remember you had mentioned in another thread how you had no desire to relocate to a different place and wonder if this might be related.

As far as I can tell, not all locations are equal in the need for expressive art.

FWIW, I would not be making a humble living playing music if I had stayed where I had last lived. It took making 'the plunge' and seeking a place to do it. There are places like this. If indeed it is important to you(and it seems to be).

 

[Tigersoap]

Not that i'm spitting on your idea but I feel like i have had a taste of just about everything. It's been this whole flipping cycle of me trying something new and going "what am I doing this for???!"
Because what really got me down was when I realized i just wasn't gonna be able to make a career out of music for myself, whether its being in the band, engineering records,writing, and all the other stuff you can do for a musical career, I can't see myself doing any of those things because of how god-awful the music industry is.

Hi Abstract,

I may see this incorrectly but I think this is a phase of growth for you.
Your illusions are shattered so there is a phase of rejection, projecting outward what you finally see inside osit.
I think this is an usual narcissistic trait to see everything in black and white.

Maybe music did not gave you what you were expecting so now it's all worthless.
You may be even more disappointed with yourself than with music after all because you did not fulfill your ideas of how it should be.

I may be wrong but what if you stopped putting so much pressure on yourself, if you tried to play with less pressure on your part to perform, to just let your heart guide your fingers without expectations, who cares if you're not the best guitar player as long as you enjoy it yourself ;)

my two cents on the matter.

 

[Bidoche]

Because what really got me down was when I realized i just wasn't gonna be able to make a career out of music for myself, whether its being in the band, engineering records,

It takes a long time to progress from "playing in a band" to "making a career out of music" and you can't really do it on your own - it takes teamwork. Do you have problems playing with other people?

writing, and all the other stuff you can do for a musical career, I can't see myself doing any of those things because of how god-awful the music industry is.

That makes no sense to me whatsoever. First step, get yourself ACCEPTED as a guitarist in a band. Do auditions. As you've got wheels, do auditions in other locations. Find people with whom you resonate with. You can't get to the top without starting at the bottom! Lose the inferiority-complex and get cracking!!!

 

[kenlee]

I'll be honest here. I've never ever played just for personal enjoyment. All my incentives for playing have been related to some anticipated future reward.

So i've tried and tried and I just don't think I can do it anymore. I don't know what else to say. I look at my gear and I hate the fact that I even own it.

I've given and given and given to the guitar, to music, to bands, i've given time, energy, loads of money, and what do I have to show for it?

In all honesty I have nothing to show for it. Just memories of shattered illusions, that's all.

Hi Abstract, I think that you do have something to show for it. It seems to me that you might be going through something like an emotional bankruptcy where you’re becoming more conscious of the illusions about yourself. I think there's a corresponding loss of energy that comes with that since these illusions were like the fuel which drove your actions. Loss of illusions means loss of fuel, loss of fuel means loss of drive. I think that your identification with this loss of drive is what your calling ‘boredom.’

But now your questioning your beliefs and questioning yourself at a much deeper emotional level, getting closer to who you are, which I think is the first step in dissolving these invisible psychological boundaries that were created as a result of believing a lie based on wishful thing. Maybe it was this wishful thinking that was the very thing that sabotaged your potential to be creative and be truly happy? It created boundaries around and within you, since you had a mental impression, an image, about the results that could be expected from all the time and energy that were put into the music. When the expected images didn't materialize then you lost your desire to play. But imo the desire for reward was that very thing that limited you from being truly creative in the first place, where creativity is it's own reward.

So I think there is something to show for it. You’ve become more aware of the invisible mental boundaries that were created as a result of your wishful thing. The boundaries are becoming transparent and maybe beginning to dissolve? Your giving your belief system a ‘cleansing.’ That’s a good start.

I really think doing the breathing program in a disciplined, consistent way along with the diet will help a lot since the act of doing this will be that very thing that will transform the ‘boredom’ into some creative activity. Otherwise I think that if there's no positive action of some kind taken when you’re in this state then you’ll just identify with it even more and the boredom will most likely become something even more negative, such as (maybe) turning into anger or depression or something like that.

The diet has helped me big time since I’ve found that a lot of my own negativity was a result of my psychological world identifying and taking the energy from my instinctive states. Then my physiological states would follow my instinctive states. If I physically felt lousy then I would corresponding feel psychologically lousy and be more prone to getting pissed off at things and/or feel depressed (probably two sides of the same coin). I think that as you get more physically and psychologically cleansed then it’ll make a big difference.

When you’re feeling physically better and dissociating (in a negative way) less, then you might discover those things which can be done that ARE creative and this will renew you. Build it and it will come. It might be like that!

 

[abstract]

Do you have problems playing with other people?

It's not that I can't get along with people, because i can and do.

No see the the issues I have with people regarding music is quite simple.

"Okay, so we got like 8 riffs here (all though up by me), do you think we should use them all?"
"ummm...I don't know"
"do you wanna add an extension to section B?"
"maybe..."
"what about that little opening bit, you wanna move that or keep it?"
"uh, just whatever."

See where this gets frustrating?????? That's all i really have to say about that. :) and i could go on.

Kenlee, I feel like what I should do is read. I read the link, and when I did I realized this is not the first instance of this emotional bankruptcy.

Thanks for your posts, guys.

 

[Pierre]

Hi Abstract,

Something I noticed at least in myself, is that when I became aware of some activities I was highly identified to, I had tendency to stop totally, sometimes throwing the baby with the bath water.

It is a kind of overcompensation, trying to compensate an excessive behaviour (extreme identification) with its opposite: an extreme abstinence.

I've also noticed that, after this overcompensation phase had faded, I sometimes went back to the activity I was identifying to but with a different state of mind. The goals had changed, the way of practising had changed, the whole context was different.

In some other cases I never went back to the activity I was identifying to. I had simply turn the page and didn't see any interest in investing any more energy in it.

So, I think it's a good point you became aware of some illusions and identifications that were surrounding your guitar practice. Maybe in a while you'll go back to it, maybe you'll never go back to it, but what seem clear is that you're now aware of some factors that were conditioning it.

 

[cholas]

I wanted to thank you for starting/restarting this thread, abstract, and those responding as well. :)

Lots of truthful little gems in these posts.

Very well said kenlee and thanks for that link. Emotional bankruptcy and the loss of projection and/or anticipation are definitely important here.

Also Bidoche has a good point as well. Being involved as a team player is key, even if you're more of a solo player, imo.

"Okay, so we got like 8 riffs here (all though up by me), do you think we should use them all?"
"ummm...I don't know"
"do you wanna add an extension to section B?"
"maybe..."
"what about that little opening bit, you wanna move that or keep it?"
"uh, just whatever."

Just my observations, but it seems playing music with others can sometimes be smoother with less words. These can sometimes get in the way of spontaneous creativity. Of course working in a group, especially one that has to perform well together in order to eat, is a great opportunity for learning external consideration etc.

I think I put the cart in front of the horse in questioning your location, work-wise. Sorry about that. Working on yourself will likely lead to being able to work well with others. Then maybe consider your location.?

 

[Bidoche]

"Okay, so we got like 8 riffs here (all though up by me), do you think we should use them all?"
"ummm...I don't know"
"do you wanna add an extension to section B?"
"maybe..."
"what about that little opening bit, you wanna move that or keep it?"
"uh, just whatever."

Just my observations, but it seems playing music with others can sometimes be smoother with less words. These can sometimes get in the way of spontaneous creativity. Of course working in a group, especially one that has to perform well together in order to eat, is a great opportunity for learning external consideration etc.

In this instance, abstract is not in a position of power within the band structure. Instead of assuming the role of leader, he is undermining his position by asking his co-workers what to do [when he alone knows already]. It might be pure democracy, but it doesn't work in reality. What needs to be resolved is whether his bandmates will accept him as the one who runs the show.