Iron said:
As I never encountered a similar situation, all I can suggest is that perhaps there is a connection between the chest problems and the incident.
Anything of note happened in your life at the onset of this chest infection?
Hi Iron
I think this kind of thing has probably been going on alot longer than this and not exclusively related to the chest infection. I've been thinking about the experience alot over the last few days so I'll explore my thoughts here and would like to recount some memories of high strangeness going back to childhood encountered by myself and also some interesting experiences concerning my brother. (I've already posted some of this in another thread somewhere so apologies for any repetition)
One of my earliest and most prominent memories in childhood is of being outside my body. I'm guessing at age between 3-6 I would find myself floating above my body, watching myself asleep. I would then float back down slowly accompanied by an extreme 'G-Force' feeling as if on a rollercoaster to join my sleeping self. At the time I just thought it a 'strange dream' but at about age 12 I discovered some literature on Astral Projection/Out of Body experiences and knew that this was infact what I had experienced as opposed to just 'dreaming'.
I think this was one of the fundamental things that got me interested in the paranormal from an early age. However, it got me distracted with all kinds of New Age nonsense over the years as I thought these OOBE's made me somehow 'special' or spiritually gifted in some way. It was only when I found Laura's work that I realised that these experiences may have had an entirely different context.
I also have memories from early childhood of a quite horrific recurring dream in which I was inside a giant white bowl trying to make it across a bridge. I was desperate in this dream as I knew getting across was crucial to my survival but some force was operating to ensure that I would not make it. This is a very vague memory and I know that much of the dream is obscured from my conscious memory but the feeling it evoked was sheer terror and had a very similar flavour to the feelings provoked during my experience the other night. Somehow, it also involved images of screaming children rushing down a corridor, again in this horrible white, dare-I-say 'alien' environment. I regard this dream, much more so than the OOBE's as being a definite event of high strangeness.
Now, onto my brother. I had a fever when I was about seven and was in bed with my younger brother in a bed a few feet away. There appeared possibly up to half a dozen small, grey translucent beings that were doing something to him in the bed next to me. I recall them as very small, possibly even smaller than me at the time and I remember thinking that something wasn't right as they could climb the walls and appeared to be on the ceiling.
There was alot of coming and going almost as if they were taking something from him and then coming back for more. My overwhelming emotion at the time was one of anger as I felt they shouldn't have been there. I kept wanting to get out of my bed to go and see him but felt scared to move. After some time, I plucked up the courage and and soon as I exited my bed, they all disappeared. Pooof, gone. I was left with the immediate feeling that I'd imagined the whole thing and I was a 'silly boy' for imagining such things. But I now think that something interfered with him big time on that night which had serious repercussions later in his life.
I currently regard it as very fortunate that my brother is still alive. Upon reaching 13-14 years he went into an extreme bout of depression and self hatred that lasted over ten years. In the early days, my parents thought it was just the usual 'teenage' thing but it just went on and on. By the time he hit his mid twenties, he was severely agrophobic, a self harmer and regularly trashed the family home which he lived in, being long term unemployed and unable to move out. He hated himself more than anyone I've ever seen and had no friends. It was devastating as he really is one of the most genuine, sincere and lovely blokes you'd ever meet. Now we all know that this kind of depression can have many causes. We had quite a Narcissistic upbringing with a fair few family issues but it wasn't the worst in the world and we (the family) just couldn't fathom it.
Here's the interesting part, and he only told me this last Christmas when he came to stay for a few days. At 25 he said he'd basically made up his mind that he was going to kill himself. He went to bed one night deciding that he was going to commit suicide sometime in the next couple of days. On falling asleep, he said he woke up on some sort of slab. He said he couldn't see properly but he was surrounded by several beings which he knew to be 'Alien'. He said that they were celebrating and congratulating each other on their work and that their efforts had paid off and had led to the end result which would be his suicide. Bare in mind here that my brother does not really believe in Aliens and I had not told him the story of what I witnessed when he was about 2-3 years old.
But! Immediately after waking from this 'dream' he said he felt the most beautiful presence he'd ever known emanating from somewhere behind him. He said he instinctively knew that it was our maternal Grandmother. Now we never met our Grandmother as she died young when my own mother was only 15 but from all accounts she was a wonderful woman. She communicated to him that it was not his time to die, that he still had 'work to do' in this lifetime and that there was no reason for him to kill himself.
Regarding the first 'Alien' part of the experience I probably would have dis-believed him myself if he told me all those years ago but knowing what I know now regarding 4D STS it certainly makes sense to me. And regarding the communication from my Grandmother, the proof is in the pudding. He said that after the communication he knew that he would never kill himself. Within a year of this experience, he had a full time job, a girlfriend and had moved out of home. It really was a 'miraculous' turn-around. He's been great ever since and now spends much of his free time involved with the We are Change London group and writing pamphlets to hand out in central london about 911.
So, make of that what you will but I think that this type of interference has been happening within my family, or at least myself and my brother for a very long time.
As regards myself and the other night, I'm not
quite sure what to make of it but I have some thoughts. Mentally and emotionally I feel like I've made some real progress recently. Along with getting lots of reading done, I've also started having Psychotherapy for issues around Narcissism/my childhood/negative thought patterns which has been incredibly helpful. I feel like I'm starting to really identify or
catch the preadator's mind in the present tense as it arises and take my thought processes down other avenues. In my daily life, these patterns have revolved generally around unwarranted anger directed at other people and self pity due to my physical ailments.
Whilst I'm still physically not very well, I'm beginning to separate/isolate and then purge the emotional pity that goes with it and I can't help feeling that this pity and anger is, and has been a significant source of food for something or other for a long time. I think the other night was perhaps an attempt to instill or manufacture some more anger and pity in me as whatever it is feels the source is drying up. Maybe, maybe not.
The thing concerns me about the other nights attack was the feeling that there was something actually
inside me that needed to come out and it seemed like it would hold on to the bitter end rather than leave. I'm definitely going to have a delve into the area of Spirit attachment to see what may be bothering me. I seem to remember Laura saying that William Baldwin's book was quite decent though it has very christian bias but if anyone else has any specific knowledge or recommendations I'd be grateful. I'm going to get the bottom of all this and seem remember the C's saying that any ailment can be confronted and overcome with the right application inward and outwardly (or words to that effect) which is encouraging.
Anyway, apologies for the long post. I have a program of being very conscious of not wanting to come across as being attention seeking or self important on this forum (perhaps it was put there by the Aliens :D).
Thank-you again for all your support. And yes, windmill Knight, it's ok to keep me in your prayers :D
