Mother dying
- Thread starter Corvus
- Start date
Oh Corvus, that would be very, very hard to witness, I am sorry for the way you are all suffering.
You have clearly done so much to be supportive and carried such weight for some time. I'm sorry that your mother was not able to directly acknowledge all you have done and how she felt by sharing what was in her heart. People can be strange about this kind of thing sometimes; there are times when I notice often this is a learned behaviour, a mirror of how they were treated themselves by their own parents.
I wondered if perhaps she hoped others would eventually share her praise and acknowledgement of you; if this 'feedback' came indirectly, it might help you to know she was truly grateful because she was letting others know what you had done for her (therefore honouring you, showing recognition, affirming who you are to others and openly acknowledging what a wonderful son you have been - so everyone is aware). Perhaps also at the heart of things she really struggled with talking about her gratitude and what you mean to her because it also meant she would have to talk of her potential passing and ultimately discuss her feelings / fears. She clearly has been confronted with overwhelming and frightening thoughts about this and perhaps has tried to escape the potential reality through dissociation or denial.
In truth, when you speak about how she was when your father passed, it sounds as though that truly broke her heart. It seems she received some kind of precognitive 'download' about his passing as well as her own more recently - I think anyone would find that very confronting! Deep down her greatest fear may possibly be that there is 'nothing' beyond this life, that without your father and without you, she might believe she will be completely 'lost' or cease to exist in any form.
Prayers for Grace and Light to embrace you all. I pray that your mother can trust what you share with her about transitioning, open her soul fully to this and focus on positive thoughts about reconnecting with loved ones. Like others have said, it doesn't matter if she is conscious or not.
Music like this might also might help her open up to the Light and facilitate a bright transition, but you would have to decide if that was appropriate, if you think she would find it calming and beautiful. You could read the words to her quietly, it might bring her some comfort. I found this particular song very cleansing and deeply comforting.
I pray that after all your mother has endured that she has a bright and swift transition into the Light
and that you can all find peace and deep gratitude for your time together.
You have clearly done so much to be supportive and carried such weight for some time. I'm sorry that your mother was not able to directly acknowledge all you have done and how she felt by sharing what was in her heart. People can be strange about this kind of thing sometimes; there are times when I notice often this is a learned behaviour, a mirror of how they were treated themselves by their own parents.
I wondered if perhaps she hoped others would eventually share her praise and acknowledgement of you; if this 'feedback' came indirectly, it might help you to know she was truly grateful because she was letting others know what you had done for her (therefore honouring you, showing recognition, affirming who you are to others and openly acknowledging what a wonderful son you have been - so everyone is aware). Perhaps also at the heart of things she really struggled with talking about her gratitude and what you mean to her because it also meant she would have to talk of her potential passing and ultimately discuss her feelings / fears. She clearly has been confronted with overwhelming and frightening thoughts about this and perhaps has tried to escape the potential reality through dissociation or denial.
In truth, when you speak about how she was when your father passed, it sounds as though that truly broke her heart. It seems she received some kind of precognitive 'download' about his passing as well as her own more recently - I think anyone would find that very confronting! Deep down her greatest fear may possibly be that there is 'nothing' beyond this life, that without your father and without you, she might believe she will be completely 'lost' or cease to exist in any form.
Your mother sounds like a good hearted, hard working decent souled being who regularly gave her best to others - and also instilled strong values in her equally good hearted, hard working son. The way you describe her above I think says a great deal about her soul essence and at the very least, she deserves to be reassured that the life she has lived was meaningful, that she will always be loved and appreciated, that you have learned a lot from her. Also that she has so much to look forward to, in a place where there is no more pain and suffering; instead greater awareness, wisdom, deep healing and powerful rejuvenation. I think it is important to emphasise that when a souled being separates from the body, it never dies... instead it has the potential to get lighter and brighter; and definitely I would remind her to look for your father - but also that he may look a lot younger, stronger and much happier than when she last saw him.
Prayers for Grace and Light to embrace you all. I pray that your mother can trust what you share with her about transitioning, open her soul fully to this and focus on positive thoughts about reconnecting with loved ones. Like others have said, it doesn't matter if she is conscious or not.
Music like this might also might help her open up to the Light and facilitate a bright transition, but you would have to decide if that was appropriate, if you think she would find it calming and beautiful. You could read the words to her quietly, it might bring her some comfort. I found this particular song very cleansing and deeply comforting.
I pray that after all your mother has endured that she has a bright and swift transition into the Light
and that you can all find peace and deep gratitude for your time together.
Corvus
Dagobah Resident
Thank you all for your support, it means a lot.
Yesterday she was sleeping, under strong sedatives. Doctor said that they treat her with mild medicine against leukemia and that it showed good results but that it causes those dead cancerous cells to spreman across body and they clogg blood vessels so the tissue is dyeing also on other organs then brain, that for now there was no bleeding on that tissue but the situation can change any moment. Today when I called they said they will start with stronger chemotheraphy but there is neural deficit because of brain strokes.
Sister came yesterday and started crying, she could not stand the sight, is very emotionally impacted, probably feels guilt because she had many arguments and conflicts with her, and in the days leading to this. I can only be as much supportive I can.
I have one hour for visits and one hour for calls to ask for condition because it is intensive care. I did a bit of praying of the prayer DCM. It is open space with other patients, beds and nurses close by so there is no real privacy.
Thank you all again, it means very much
Yesterday she was sleeping, under strong sedatives. Doctor said that they treat her with mild medicine against leukemia and that it showed good results but that it causes those dead cancerous cells to spreman across body and they clogg blood vessels so the tissue is dyeing also on other organs then brain, that for now there was no bleeding on that tissue but the situation can change any moment. Today when I called they said they will start with stronger chemotheraphy but there is neural deficit because of brain strokes.
Sister came yesterday and started crying, she could not stand the sight, is very emotionally impacted, probably feels guilt because she had many arguments and conflicts with her, and in the days leading to this. I can only be as much supportive I can.
I have only my sister from my close family, all others like grandparents are not alive, some family from father and mother side like aunts are not close by, are in other countries or do not care, having their health issues that started or got worse with vaccines, one aunt has frequent vertigos and loses conscionses sometime, other that has asthma and other things operated and extracted her womb recently, uncle that has prostate cancer that showed recovery and after vaccine it spread all over and had 4 operations in 6 months and now is on chemotheraphy and pissed on everybody and everything because he has some knowledge by experience how the system works.
I have one hour for visits and one hour for calls to ask for condition because it is intensive care. I did a bit of praying of the prayer DCM. It is open space with other patients, beds and nurses close by so there is no real privacy.
That is a good idea.
It is very consolating song, she is catholic Christian and would go to church and listen to mass through tv or mobile phone.
Thank you all again, it means very much
Corvus
Dagobah Resident
I got a call yesterday about 10 pm that mother passed away. She was on morphine last few days luckily. I did not visit yesterday, my car broke but sister went, went almost every day, planned to go today when it was fixed. She stopped breathing probably because of brain damage. At least she won t suffer anymore because it all lasted from January 8th, was suffering all that time. Suffered all her life and ended like this with 65 years of age.
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Je vous présente mes plus sincères condoléances à vous et votre famille...
Puisse votre Maman avoir une transition douce, rapide et lumineuse...
De tout coeur avec Vous...
My deepest condolences to you and your family...
May your Mum have a smooth, rapid and luminous transition...
My heart goes out to you...
Puisse votre Maman avoir une transition douce, rapide et lumineuse...
De tout coeur avec Vous...
My deepest condolences to you and your family...
May your Mum have a smooth, rapid and luminous transition...
My heart goes out to you...
