Obsession with beauty - Plastic surgeries - Trans (Katoi from Thailand)

[Arwenn]

The benefits of butt implants

Oh dear Lord This is just so, so tragic.

 

[naorma]

My wife want to do souch surgeries, I dont find it neccery, because for me she is beautiful how she looks.
But she says, that she is afraid, that as we get older, she will not look so good for me and that I will leave here because of that. Even when I say to here, that her look is not everything and that she will look good for me even when we are older, because I love here, she stays uncertain about that.

Beauty comes from inside! That is my very strong belief!
The other day I talked to a small oriental woman who said she did not look too good. When I said to her: "Oh, but you are beautiful! Beauty comes from inside!" That was no lie, because I could see in her face her inner beauty, and that is all that counts! And she happily agreed!

 

[Elisasheva]

That's a topic for me, because I myself am the product of mind programming by social media, tv series (mostly east asian) and other media, programming which says pretty + young = valuable and noticable.
I just reached my 30's and to be honest, if I could afford it I'd have things done to my face and body to look the youngest possible... I'm not a fan of fake looks so I wouldn't go for any lip fillers etc., just anti aging stuff.

My thoughts are as follows. Young people watch beautiful and youthful individuals on social media, and lately, East Asian dramas have also become incredibly popular. In these shows, all the actors always look flawless, young, smooth-skinned, and almost completely free of imperfections. Those who do have any kind of visible flaw ALWAYS play only supporting roles — they're background characters meant to complement the valuable, worthy, perfect main leads.

I myself love these East Asian dramas, and also the now-popular BL series (about love between two men), where the characters are also always beautiful, youthful, and polished. But I realised it's a trap for weak minded people with low self esteem.

Right now, these East Asian trends are becoming extremely popular among young people in the West. As a result, this kind of thinking is starting to take root in people’s minds: that if you're not under 30, with a perfect face and body, then nothing good will ever happen to you, you don't deserve love, and you'd better just stay home and be invisible.

And honestly… I’ve started seeing myself through that lens. I'm very anxious about having turned 30, and I find myself wishing time could just stop, because the fear I feel about aging is overwhelming. When I talk to my peers, I realize that most of them feel the same. This is a massive pressure we’re all under. Especially when most of them don't have children, a lot of them don't have partners, their lives are not as they should look like in their eyes—they feel 20, when in reality they are 30. I also have an impression that people generally don't have anything to offer when it comes to character traits, personality, hobbies, so they think that being physically attractive will make up for that somehow.

When it comes to trends in Korea, Thailand, and also China — generally in East Asia — yes, they have an obsession with plastic surgery and looking eternally young, mainly because of the film and music industries which set the standards. In general, there's a tendency there to fall into fashion traps and to socially exclude people just because they do things differently from the majority. For example, in Korea there's a huge obsession with buying clothes and accessories from famous designers. Women go into debt just to own handbags from luxury brands that cost several thousand dollars.

The question I still cannot answer remains: how to break free from this sick mindset? The phrases about how beauty comes from the inside, how our characters matter, not the looks—they don't really work

 

[Mark7]

'Life is more than the body', I forget who said that, and we have forgotten it, or we do not really 'grok' it these days. Many have been subtly brainwashed to believe that the physical world is all there is. So people put their whole being and attention into their appearance. I always thought that all this focus on outward appearance - makeup, clothes, styles, all the money spent - it will all crash and burn one day.

 

[T.C.]

That's a topic for me, because I myself am the product of mind programming by social media, tv series (mostly east asian) and other media, programming which says pretty + young = valuable and noticable.
I just reached my 30's and to be honest, if I could afford it I'd have things done to my face and body to look the youngest possible... I'm not a fan of fake looks so I wouldn't go for any lip fillers etc., just anti aging stuff.

My thoughts are as follows. Young people watch beautiful and youthful individuals on social media, and lately, East Asian dramas have also become incredibly popular. In these shows, all the actors always look flawless, young, smooth-skinned, and almost completely free of imperfections. Those who do have any kind of visible flaw ALWAYS play only supporting roles — they're background characters meant to complement the valuable, worthy, perfect main leads.

I myself love these East Asian dramas, and also the now-popular BL series (about love between two men), where the characters are also always beautiful, youthful, and polished. But I realised it's a trap for weak minded people with low self esteem.

Right now, these East Asian trends are becoming extremely popular among young people in the West. As a result, this kind of thinking is starting to take root in people’s minds: that if you're not under 30, with a perfect face and body, then nothing good will ever happen to you, you don't deserve love, and you'd better just stay home and be invisible.

And honestly… I’ve started seeing myself through that lens. I'm very anxious about having turned 30, and I find myself wishing time could just stop, because the fear I feel about aging is overwhelming. When I talk to my peers, I realize that most of them feel the same. This is a massive pressure we’re all under. Especially when most of them don't have children, a lot of them don't have partners, their lives are not as they should look like in their eyes—they feel 20, when in reality they are 30. I also have an impression that people generally don't have anything to offer when it comes to character traits, personality, hobbies, so they think that being physically attractive will make up for that somehow.

When it comes to trends in Korea, Thailand, and also China — generally in East Asia — yes, they have an obsession with plastic surgery and looking eternally young, mainly because of the film and music industries which set the standards. In general, there's a tendency there to fall into fashion traps and to socially exclude people just because they do things differently from the majority. For example, in Korea there's a huge obsession with buying clothes and accessories from famous designers. Women go into debt just to own handbags from luxury brands that cost several thousand dollars.

The question I still cannot answer remains: how to break free from this sick mindset? The phrases about how beauty comes from the inside, how our characters matter, not the looks—they don't really work

Maybe change the quality of the fiction you choose to consume.

 

[Anya112003]

I am 73 with gray hair and wrinkles. I feel lucky to have aged as gracefully as I have. I would never consider plastic surgery and if I really wanted a designer bag, I will go to the thrift store. I devote my energies to healthy eating, sunshine, exercise, gaining knowledge and daily prayer. Too many are swayed by the pursuit of the superficial.

 

[loreta]

Maybe change the quality of the fiction you choose to consume.

I agree, stop watching shows where you see people who are made of plastic. Read good books that exercise your gray cells, stop looking at yourself in the mirror. In fact, this fashion that only admires the youth and beauty of young people is an illusion and is narcissism taken to the extreme. Me, me, me, me, beautiful, perfect, pretty as fashion, without wrinkles, me, me, me. It's a trap that fills the bank accounts of fashion designers, plastic surgeons, etc. Everything is false. You have a choice: to live in the illusion that fashion offers you, or to live on the path of reflection and depth, far from this superficial and lying world.

You are still young. But I apologize for shocking you, you will grow old, like everyone else, because aging is part of life, it's a universal law.

And yes, beauty is internal. It has nothing to do with a plasticized face or body.

 

[Bastian]

Same tendency to go to extremes for male body standards :

Well, Guy Debord's "The Society of the Spectacle" was published in 1967...

Hollywood + TV + pop music + Youtube + Instagram and other "(anti)social" networks have a heavy influence on minds of most of the people...

Less religion/spirituality, more "materialism".
Less community and cooperation, more individualism and competition.
Less human depth, more superficiality.
And so on.
"End of times" (or cycle(s)), and accelerating...

Anthropologically, it's a fascinating phenomenon. I guess we're a highly narcissistic species !
(But personally I'm getting more and more tired/disgusted by this "fake & superficial matrix".)

 

[Bastian]

Same channel, two "historical" videos that could be of interest :

 

[meadow_wind]

The question I still cannot answer remains: how to break free from this sick mindset?

Everyone needs to become blind That will surely do the trick!

Joking apart, for most people living in the cities where the first impression is made within 15 seconds, where everyone has been conditioned by "images" portraying very high and specific beauty standards, it's unfortunately a trap hard to get out of, especially for the youth who are so impressionable or for those who aspire to work with the public.

I always thought that all this focus on outward appearance - makeup, clothes, styles, all the money spent - it will all crash and burn one day.

Once people fall into survival mode, anything superficial will crash indeed.

Maybe change the quality of the fiction you choose to consume.

I don't think it has to do with "quality of the fiction".
Many Asian TV shows, especially historical or Fantasy (Wuxia and Xianxia) dramas, excel in compelling storytelling and stunning aesthetics, from cinematography to costumes, set design, and music. Each element is crafted with artistic care: it's a work of art.

So the issue has more to do with "Media" in general bombarding us day and night: TV, magazines, publicity, internet, etc.
Anything that has to do with "visuals/photography" + our individual triggers, our own vulnerabilities, like low self-esteem or a fear of aging, that make us hyper-focus on the flawless, youthful ideals these dramas often portray. This is compounded by a broader cultural emphasis on the physical world, where appearance is tied to worth, often sidelining deeper values like character, kindness, or personal growth. The spiritual or inner world, our sense of purpose, resilience, or unique qualities, gets overshadowed by this relentless focus on external perfection.

Constant exposure to these polished images, especially without balancing them with diverse perspectives or real-world experiences, conditions us to internalize unrealistic standards. Breaking free from this mindset is tough because platitudes like "beauty comes from within" often feel hollow against the glossy allure of media. One way to start is by diversifying what we consume, seeking out stories that celebrate varied experiences, ages, and imperfections. Other ways are to reflect on our personal triggers, invest in hobbies, relationships, or practices that ground us in our own worth.

 

[meadow_wind]

Same channel, two "historical" videos that could be of interest :

Those 4 videos from your 2 posts are gold.

Indeed, I was aware of bodybuilding standards being insane because I've always been a fan of Arnold since T2. So I looked up what bodybuilding looked like in the 50's and every decade afterward, and boy... it went from a normal, good-looking, muscled-up man, to something so unnatural I want to vomit just looking at them.

Even for women, the 4 divisions (Bikini, Figure, Physique, and Bodybuilding) underwent the same grotesque changes.
I've always said that people who train to develop aptitudes, such as circus disciplines, dance, or Shaolin Warriors for example, they will end up looking good as a bonus. But the people who train for the sake of looks only... well...

 

[meadow_wind]

I just had another thought. People who had a near death experience (or the ones who dies and were able to communicate with Laura during a session) all said that once we go to 5D (or paradise, as it is called by religious people), we become young again, everything looks more vibrant, more alive, more colorfull and more beautiful.

Could it be that this obsession with youth and beauty is some sort of natural instinctive reaction since our soul knows about these things, and it stays in our subconscious?

 

[Elisasheva]

@meadow_wind thanks for putting it into words so perfectly. I wanted to respond sth similar: those east asian series have a lot to offer, some of them are very deep, screenwriters have a lot of imagination and fresh ideas, especially chinese series and novels are amazing, but the biggest flaw there is this worship of beauty/youth almost every single time (with some exceptions of more mature ones, for example crime, where main leads sometimes are people near 40, still attractive though). We want to watch beauty, that's the truth, and the industry uses this weakness against us by bombarding us with the fake image of self worth. Without the internet people looked up to movie stars, now the problem deepened because we have constant access to all media and we consume too much of it everyday (like internet personalities with "perfect" lives).

And changing the content I consume doesn't help much since almost everywhere the tendency is the same. I also read a lot of things related to topics on this forum, so I don't only focus on popular media, but I've loved eastern series and music since I was 20 I think, and it's very hard to just cut it off. It was my comfort zone for a long time. I just wrote down the downsides of consuming their media. What makes me feel a little better is that actors/stars I've known since then aged with me and are now above 30yo, and their world didn't end

 

[ApotheosisMMC.]

That's a topic for me, because I myself am the product of mind programming by social media, tv series (mostly east asian) and other media, programming which says pretty + young = valuable and noticable.
I just reached my 30's and to be honest, if I could afford it I'd have things done to my face and body to look the youngest possible... I'm not a fan of fake looks so I wouldn't go for any lip fillers etc., just anti aging stuff.

My thoughts are as follows. Young people watch beautiful and youthful individuals on social media, and lately, East Asian dramas have also become incredibly popular. In these shows, all the actors always look flawless, young, smooth-skinned, and almost completely free of imperfections. Those who do have any kind of visible flaw ALWAYS play only supporting roles — they're background characters meant to complement the valuable, worthy, perfect main leads.

I myself love these East Asian dramas, and also the now-popular BL series (about love between two men), where the characters are also always beautiful, youthful, and polished. But I realised it's a trap for weak minded people with low self esteem.

Right now, these East Asian trends are becoming extremely popular among young people in the West. As a result, this kind of thinking is starting to take root in people’s minds: that if you're not under 30, with a perfect face and body, then nothing good will ever happen to you, you don't deserve love, and you'd better just stay home and be invisible.

And honestly… I’ve started seeing myself through that lens. I'm very anxious about having turned 30, and I find myself wishing time could just stop, because the fear I feel about aging is overwhelming. When I talk to my peers, I realize that most of them feel the same. This is a massive pressure we’re all under. Especially when most of them don't have children, a lot of them don't have partners, their lives are not as they should look like in their eyes—they feel 20, when in reality they are 30. I also have an impression that people generally don't have anything to offer when it comes to character traits, personality, hobbies, so they think that being physically attractive will make up for that somehow.

When it comes to trends in Korea, Thailand, and also China — generally in East Asia — yes, they have an obsession with plastic surgery and looking eternally young, mainly because of the film and music industries which set the standards. In general, there's a tendency there to fall into fashion traps and to socially exclude people just because they do things differently from the majority. For example, in Korea there's a huge obsession with buying clothes and accessories from famous designers. Women go into debt just to own handbags from luxury brands that cost several thousand dollars.

The question I still cannot answer remains: how to break free from this sick mindset? The phrases about how beauty comes from the inside, how our characters matter, not the looks—they don't really work

It's okay to "be ugly." In fact, in many cases, it's an advantage from a certain perspective, as it allows you to focus on the things that really matter.

Of course, most people don't judge your physical appearance and care very little about it. It's the individual who amplifies that importance and insecurity.

What T.C. told you, the media, its stereotypes, and the exaggerated cult of the physical—are clearly intentional programs highly effective in dissociating many individuals from reality, especially if they are consumed en masse.

The choice is yours, but I suppose your deepest conscience tells you that what I'm saying is right, and therefore a battle is coming for you.

In fact, if you cut off the flow or slow it down and spend much of your time on more productive things like acquiring knowledge, the thoughts of self-loathing and frustration with this and other issues quickly evaporate.

 

[Nienna]

Beauty comes from inside! That is my very strong belief!

This is very true, but so many do not understand it.

My half-sister, if you took only her looks into consideration would be classified as very pretty, however, she is a very nasty person who thinks only of herself and what she can get from others. If people looked on the outside what they really were on the inside, real beauty would be much easier to see.

And, I think it's tragic that so much emphasis is put on "beauty". There is so much stress and low self-esteem felt by those who think one is only as good as they look.