Session 23 April 2022

[dredger]

But yeah, there are people here I almost feel like I know and like them and that they are almost like friends. And I don’t say anything about that.

Thanks BHelmet, you made me laugh & smile
I feel the same regarding the sentence i quoted above, i will just add that i would enjoy meeting all if this was possible.

I don't look my stats, but can't help to notice the numbers near the bell on top and it remains useful to check it, just to know if someone answered directly to one of my posts (or quoted me) and maybe answer back. And i agree that there's a part of my machine (my creature, my 3D ego thing), with all its complexity, being around the corner and who like to be loved. But it's our nature, it's at the same time natural and funny to observe how our egotic part of us is ... in a way ... feeding itself.

But, or at least to me, this remains important, i explain it like this : networking means exchanging, and it's not only exchanging information but also feelings (and other things when you meet the person in real, but it's not possible here). These feelings are part of the impressions , it's another kind of food we all need to grow, and we have 2 ways to express them here : by replying to one as you did or by "liking". We have to do with what we have, this would be easier (or not for some) if we could meet face to face, the possibility then to smile at someone, to watch each other in the eyes, but we do not have that, the forum is like a degraded but functional way to network, and i wanted to point out this "like" function as being the tool we can use to send someone a smile, an encouragement, and even if it's also used by one's ego to be fed, this remains natural because we are STS beings, or STO candidates who understood they were implanted a mind which is not ours (this remember me Don Juan's explanations to Carlos in his last book).

The lone word that come to my mind here is gratitude. Thanks all to be there, thanks to Laura to have succeeded to build this wonderful community which help(ed) me to discover that ... i do not need anymore to read science-fiction or fantasy books ( ), I live already in, there are many secrets to discover, treasures to find (together) and a lot of nice people to meet.

 

[Maat]

One noticeable fact can be seen by reading old posts or threads.
For instance, just 5y before, i took as example the 1st C's session of 2017, this one - how many likes for the initial post of Laura ? Only 4, and for the following responses : none
Then the first session of 2018 (here) : 12 like, and almost no like for all the following responses.
In 2019, here, 146 likes, then in the first session of 2020 : 182 and in 2021 : 271 and the first one for this year is already at 280.
I wonder if this is just a consequence of the fact that we are more exchanging

Well, don't forget that the like feature didn't exist before April 2018.

 

[MJF]

Well, don't forget that the like feature didn't exist before April 2018.

Could it also be that the Forum is attracting more interest and more members perhaps.

 

[Maat]

Could it also be that the Forum is attracting more interest and more members perhaps.

Yes of course.

 

[MJF]

This statement from the C's appealed to me ... i wondered why and some answers (i better intellectually name them "ideas") came to my mind ... in the context of the forum. Let's try to explain what came in :

Except for a few of us here, and of course the crew at "le Chateau", we do not know each other physically. Some know each other's face and maybe voice if they attain some group sessions organized here (EE, readings). Thus, except with our close ones we sometimes cross everydays, and can act more concretely in order to give more love, more care, more understanding, empathy ... i wondered how can we also act the same here at the level of the forum ?

First answer is by participating, by exchanging, discussing, sharing thoughts, responding to some. But the second answer i had in mind and which motivated me to post is the "like" button option you can switch on for any post you read and you liked, or you enjoyed (or a few other emotions). Personally, I stil have some difficulties to dare to write on the forum, simply because i always fear to be badly considered, to miss, to be told that this was already discussed ... to be in a way "ridiculised". Maybe it's an amplified sentiment (thanks to 4D STS) in me (?). This behavior strongly reduced since 2 years, but i well feel it's still present, ready to occupy my mind, which sometimes lead to discard a whole text i spent 1h to write here.

So, to come back to the "like" button, or even better, the one, i think that it's one mean we have to give each other love here on the forum. I would even dare to say ... or let's say at this stage it's an asumption, that the more likes (to summarize) we'll share each other the stronger will be our mutual shield. A bit like the chamans who made a ritual to protect Putin, but here we all participate for all.

I admit that it pleases me to see my "bell" activated on the top of the forum page after X hours/days of being absent and to read that i received a couple of like, i have to admit that it's ... well ... pleasant, it makes me smile, i feel it like a reward ... I received something I have hard to well translate into words, and it's a good thing, a good feeling, which encourage me to even more participate.

One noticeable fact can be seen by reading old posts or threads.
For instance, just 5y before, i took as example the 1st C's session of 2017, this one - how many likes for the initial post of Laura ? Only 4, and for the following responses : none
Then the first session of 2018 (here) : 12 like, and almost no like for all the following responses.
In 2019, here, 146 likes, then in the first session of 2020 : 182 and in 2021 : 271 and the first one for this year is already at 280.
I wonder if this is just a consequence of the fact that we are more exchanging, like something noticeable, and that's all, or that it could also have an active and direct role which would be to help to strenghten the community ? The C's regularly advised to support each other, and using this function is the right tool we have here, through the forum, to do it concretely.

I regularly read a dozen of new posts in a row within a thread i follow and completely forget in such readings to click on "like" even when I really liked or appreciated what someone posted/linked/shared. From now i'll try to pay more attention to the posts I read and more often use the like function, this will be my way to thanks and send love to any here ... because i think it's a good habit to take and a good thing to do.

That's all

The C's statement that Forum members should Give each other love abundantly" reminds me that the last words of Jesus to his apostles and disciples before the Ascension were "Love one another as I have loved you".

 

[Iggdrasil]

Dear friends!

Russians are very impressived of the world people support and send our thanks;

 

[MJF]

In relation to the search for the key to the Unified Field Theorem, I came across this statement by the C's in the session dated 25 July 1998 which may be of help:

A: … Knowledge protects in the most amazing ways. Mathematics is “taught” in your realm in such a way that only a select few will learn. And mathematics is the language of all creation. For example, advanced math studies, such as algebra, provide the keys to unlocking the doors between the matter and antimatter universes."

Hence, the model for UFT needs, I assume, to take account of the anti-matter universe too.

Sometimes the clues the C's give can be linked to other statements made in the same session. In that session, for example, there was discussion of a person transitioning directly from 3rd to 5th density via dying and whether that implies that persons can transition directly from 3rd to 4th density without dying.

Q: Well if a person transitions directly from 3rd to 5th density via dying, that implies that persons can transition directly from 3rd to 4th density without dying. Is that correct?​

A: Yes.

Q: How does that feel? How is that experience …

A: Alice through the looking glass.

This reference to Lewis Carroll's book 'Alice Through the Looking Glass' (a book in many ways about an alternate universe) made me think that was it possible in some way, whether consciously or unconsciously, that Carroll had knowledge of the matter and antimatter universes since two of the characters in his book are the identical twins Tweedledum and Tweedledee. Apparently Tweedledum and Tweedledee are based on two words invented by the poet John Byrom in a satire depicting the rivalry of two great celebrities of the time, musicians George Frederic Handel* and Giovanni Bononcini. The Tweedle brothers never contradict each other, even when one of them, according to the rhyme, "agrees to have a battle". Rather, they complement each other's words. However, the matter and antimatter universes also complement each other too. Carroll was a brilliant mathematician and was aware of current mathematical and scientific theories since the book contains many jibes aimed at late 19th century mathematicians such as James Clerke Maxwell and his use of quaternions. Moreover, Carroll was a member of the Orphite Circle (who were Rosicrucians) and may have participated in seances or trance medium sessions involving the use of a pschomantium. Could he and his fellow Rosicrucians have learned of higher physics during these sessions including perhaps the matter and antimatter universes?​

*Curiously, the C's once made a possible reference to Handel when they said in answer to a question from Laura that: "[You] Need a better "handl" on it".

A fellow Rosicrucian who almost certainly participated in such sessions was Edward Bulwer Lytton, an English Victorian statesman and author. One of his most influential books was 'Vril, the Power of the Coming Race'. This book, dealing with an advanced race of humans living within the Earth who used a special force or energy called "vril", would inspire the Thule Society and through them the Nazis who, of course, created Die Glocke - the Bell. Evidently, Bulwer Lytton was in receipt of special knowledge, which he revealed through fiction. Could Lewis Carroll, who may have taken part in the same seances, have been doing the same in his works as well?​

 

[Bluegazer]

In relation to the search for the key to the Unified Field Theorem, I came across this statement by the C's in the session dated 25 July 1998 which may be of help:

Session 20 October 2018

Thank you all! A very interesting session! I agree. Thank you very much for the session.

cassiopaea.org

When I read that part in the session, just like you also thought about the reverse. It was then that i remember the passage of a book about atlantis and his scientific knowledge: A Dweller on Two Planets: Book the First: Chapter IV: Axte Incal, Axtuce Mun

(Marked in bold the most relevant).

 

[MJF]

I have been looking at old transcripts and came across this gem which backs up what has been said about the Star of David and links up with anti-gravity (I have bolded what I think are the key points from our viewpoint):

Tetrahedrons and Pyramids

Session 17August 1996:

Q: (L) All right, let's get on to our questions here. Let me ask a quick one about the tetrahedron. Terry, you ask it, because you know more about it. (T) The Tetrahedron, triangle mathematics that Hoagland is working with in conjunction with the Mars/Cydonia region where he supposedly discovered this...

A: Energy consolidator. EM Wave capturer.

Q: (T) Ok, so it’s an EM wave capturer. Does it also expel EM waves?

A: Close.

Q: (T) From the same points? The 19 points, whatever it is... [He obviously meant the points on the planet that Hoagland talks about that are located at about 19 Degrees of latitude if you place a tetrahedron inside a sphere.]

A: Channels and enhances, when used properly, and in pristine conditions.

Q: (T) Hoagland is not talking about... whatever he's talking about, as far as the mathematics go, of the tetrahedral triangles within the sphere, which I'm assuming this planet is calling the sacred geometries, but are physics-type things of different densities, which may not actually be right. OK, this doesn't apply just to Mars, this is, every sphere has these same properties...?

A: Yes.

Q: (T)... a golfball, a base ball; I know they're not perfect spheres, they have dimples; all the way up to the sun, and so forth and so on, of any size, made out of any material, as long as it's a sphere, it will have the same properties.

A: No.

Q: (T) OK, it has to have certain kinds of materials?

A: No, must be magnetized.

Q: (T) OK, it's a magnetized sphere; something that has a magnetic field around it. (L) Is the tetrahedral configuration a property of the magnetism?

A: Yes. No.

Q: (T) Yes to my question, no to Laura's question?

A: Yes.

Q: (T) OK, my question is, the sphere has to be able to generate a magnetic field, like the earth has a magnetic field, like Mars generates a magnetic field...

A: Or be magnetized by installation of internal magnetic generator.

Q: (L) OK, what's the purpose of this? What's the purpose of these tetrahedrons? What are the...

A: Purpose is not proper term.

Q: (T) That's right. It's not a purpose, it just exists this way. These spheres that are magnetic, or are able to be magnetized, this happens just because they are what they are, and this is how the physics works?

A: Reflection of universal balance.

Q: (L) OK, they just simply... and is it that something occurs at the points of these triangles that is noticeable, I mean, is it like a power point?

A: No.

Q: (L) OK, well, this guy Jim [who is in communication with Ark] says that they are designated by different monuments on the planet's surface...

A: Nonsense!!!

Q: (T) Thank you! (L)... and that they are visual sighting...

A: Artificial constructed tetrahedrons are placed on strategic locations on the planet's surface in order to utilize magnetic fields properly.

Q: (L) Who places these artificially constructed tetrahedrons at these points?

A: The artificial constructors.

Q: (L) And who are they?

A: Whomever they may be.

Q: (T) In other words, they can be anybody. They're artificial constructor, they could be anybody... (L) If people know about them, they can do this...

A: No, no, no. Nineteen degrees north and south.

Q: (T) Correct, those are the numbers that Hoagland came up with, with his stuff. On most of the planets, and our sun, we seem to have major events happening, or have happened...

A: Hawaii.

Q: (T) Yes, Hawaii, Puerto Rico... let's see, 19 degrees north and south, Philippines, I think, is somewhere close, on the south side. Major volcanos... (F) Philippines is on the north side, that's not in the Southern Hemisphere... (T) I'd have to pull out a global map to see what the 19 degrees are. On Mars, Cydonia resides at approximately 19 degrees, the Giant volcano, the dead volcano on Mars is approximately 19 degrees, the stuff that they found on Venus, the major things, are at approximately 19 degrees. The sunspots are approximately 19 degrees, the red spot on Jupiter... (L) Is there anything else we want to get on this tetrahedron... Is there anything else we could ask about this subject, that we haven't thought of ourselves... (T) I'm sure there's a lot... (L) Oh, I know... that you could give us?

A: Unlimited.

Q: (L) Do the tetrahedrons spin within the sphere? Do these power points of the tetrahedron spin?

A: Energy fields flow in balance.

Q: (T) So they're spinning to keep balance? (J) Like a gyro. [Notice that the Cs did NOT say that anything was spinning, only that energy was flowing.] (T) Is there... now, am I correct in the fact that there's a direct relationship here to the real Hebrew Star of David, to these tetrahedrals?

A: Yes.

Q: (T) And that everything that has been done to it for the last 500 years or so, has been done to screw things up?

A: Yes.

Q: (T) Yes. So that that symbol is not a religious symbol, as such, but a very important... (L)...power symbol?

A: Yes.

Q: (T) It describes a physics that transcends the densities.

A: So is pentagon.

Q: (T) So is the Pentagon? (J) A pentagon. (T) The pentagon shape. These are part of what humans describe as the sacred geometries.

A: Yes.

Q: (T) So, in that 'Bear' book that I have...

A: You as Atlanteans knew this, and lived by it in many ways. For example, the pyramid recharges by capturing exactly half the energy points, thus allowing a positive imbalance buildup to be captured, then expended.

Q: (L) OK, are we finished, or... Ok, we know we are not finished, but we know we want to cover a couple of things... is there something more about the tetrahedrons that is important for us to know now? (T) That we can pass on to Ark? (L) Yes, essential to know now? A real 'goodie?'

A: Open.

And I guess we can now add the Octagon to the Tetrahedron and Pentagon.

 

[Bluegazer]

I have been looking at old transcripts and came across this gem which backs up what has been said about the Star of David and links up with anti-gravity (I have bolded what I think are the key points from our viewpoint):

Tetrahedrons and Pyramids

Session 17August 1996:

Q: (L) All right, let's get on to our questions here. Let me ask a quick one about the tetrahedron. Terry, you ask it, because you know more about it. (T) The Tetrahedron, triangle mathematics that Hoagland is working with in conjunction with the Mars/Cydonia region where he supposedly discovered this...

A: Energy consolidator. EM Wave capturer.

Q: (T) Ok, so it’s an EM wave capturer. Does it also expel EM waves?

A: Close.

Q: (T) From the same points? The 19 points, whatever it is... [He obviously meant the points on the planet that Hoagland talks about that are located at about 19 Degrees of latitude if you place a tetrahedron inside a sphere.]

A: Channels and enhances, when used properly, and in pristine conditions.

Q: (T) Hoagland is not talking about... whatever he's talking about, as far as the mathematics go, of the tetrahedral triangles within the sphere, which I'm assuming this planet is calling the sacred geometries, but are physics-type things of different densities, which may not actually be right. OK, this doesn't apply just to Mars, this is, every sphere has these same properties...?

A: Yes.

Q: (T)... a golfball, a base ball; I know they're not perfect spheres, they have dimples; all the way up to the sun, and so forth and so on, of any size, made out of any material, as long as it's a sphere, it will have the same properties.

A: No.

Q: (T) OK, it has to have certain kinds of materials?

A: No, must be magnetized.

Q: (T) OK, it's a magnetized sphere; something that has a magnetic field around it. (L) Is the tetrahedral configuration a property of the magnetism?

A: Yes. No.

Q: (T) Yes to my question, no to Laura's question?

A: Yes.

Q: (T) OK, my question is, the sphere has to be able to generate a magnetic field, like the earth has a magnetic field, like Mars generates a magnetic field...

A: Or be magnetized by installation of internal magnetic generator.

Q: (L) OK, what's the purpose of this? What's the purpose of these tetrahedrons? What are the...

A: Purpose is not proper term.

Q: (T) That's right. It's not a purpose, it just exists this way. These spheres that are magnetic, or are able to be magnetized, this happens just because they are what they are, and this is how the physics works?

A: Reflection of universal balance.

Q: (L) OK, they just simply... and is it that something occurs at the points of these triangles that is noticeable, I mean, is it like a power point?

A: No.

Q: (L) OK, well, this guy Jim [who is in communication with Ark] says that they are designated by different monuments on the planet's surface...

A: Nonsense!!!

Q: (T) Thank you! (L)... and that they are visual sighting...

A: Artificial constructed tetrahedrons are placed on strategic locations on the planet's surface in order to utilize magnetic fields properly.

Q: (L) Who places these artificially constructed tetrahedrons at these points?

A: The artificial constructors.

Q: (L) And who are they?

A: Whomever they may be.

Q: (T) In other words, they can be anybody. They're artificial constructor, they could be anybody... (L) If people know about them, they can do this...

A: No, no, no. Nineteen degrees north and south.

Q: (T) Correct, those are the numbers that Hoagland came up with, with his stuff. On most of the planets, and our sun, we seem to have major events happening, or have happened...

A: Hawaii.

Q: (T) Yes, Hawaii, Puerto Rico... let's see, 19 degrees north and south, Philippines, I think, is somewhere close, on the south side. Major volcanos... (F) Philippines is on the north side, that's not in the Southern Hemisphere... (T) I'd have to pull out a global map to see what the 19 degrees are. On Mars, Cydonia resides at approximately 19 degrees, the Giant volcano, the dead volcano on Mars is approximately 19 degrees, the stuff that they found on Venus, the major things, are at approximately 19 degrees. The sunspots are approximately 19 degrees, the red spot on Jupiter... (L) Is there anything else we want to get on this tetrahedron... Is there anything else we could ask about this subject, that we haven't thought of ourselves... (T) I'm sure there's a lot... (L) Oh, I know... that you could give us?

A: Unlimited.

Q: (L) Do the tetrahedrons spin within the sphere? Do these power points of the tetrahedron spin?

A: Energy fields flow in balance.

Q: (T) So they're spinning to keep balance? (J) Like a gyro. [Notice that the Cs did NOT say that anything was spinning, only that energy was flowing.] (T) Is there... now, am I correct in the fact that there's a direct relationship here to the real Hebrew Star of David, to these tetrahedrals?

A: Yes.

Q: (T) And that everything that has been done to it for the last 500 years or so, has been done to screw things up?

A: Yes.

Q: (T) Yes. So that that symbol is not a religious symbol, as such, but a very important... (L)...power symbol?

A: Yes.

Q: (T) It describes a physics that transcends the densities.

A: So is pentagon.

Q: (T) So is the Pentagon? (J) A pentagon. (T) The pentagon shape. These are part of what humans describe as the sacred geometries.

A: Yes.

Q: (T) So, in that 'Bear' book that I have...

A: You as Atlanteans knew this, and lived by it in many ways. For example, the pyramid recharges by capturing exactly half the energy points, thus allowing a positive imbalance buildup to be captured, then expended.

Q: (L) OK, are we finished, or... Ok, we know we are not finished, but we know we want to cover a couple of things... is there something more about the tetrahedrons that is important for us to know now? (T) That we can pass on to Ark? (L) Yes, essential to know now? A real 'goodie?'

A: Open.

And I guess we can now add the Octagon to the Tetrahedron and Pentagon.

It is 4am here in Argentina. I'm having some trouble sleeping, so I grabbed my cell phone and started watching some video on YT. To my surprise thunderbolts project uploaded this video 7 hours ago!

And I think @ark will be interested. Magnetic fields, vortices, geometry, spirals.

 

[Ca.]

Diseases from Outer Space — Our Cosmic Destiny
Original author: September 2020

• Fred Hoyle and Chandra Wickramasinghe Chandra Wickramasinghe (University of Buckingham, UK)

The first edition of the monumental book Diseases from Space by Sir Fred Hoyle and N Chandra Wickramasinghe appeared some 40 years ago, encapsulating the key principles of Panspermia, and it has been the guiding principle in the new scientific field of Astrobiology.

This latest edition, revised and expanded by Chandra Wickamasinghe, continues to describe the consequences of the theory of cometary panspermia that relate to the origins of epidemic disease. Available data on historic and modern plagues are analysed to show that extraterrestrial bacteria and viruses are the cause of ongoing pandemics of diseases.

Adherence to an inappropriate and obsolete theory of pandemics could put in jeopardy the economic well-being of the entire world, perhaps even threatening the continued existence of our civilization.
Contents:

• Foreword
• List of Figures
• Acknowledgements
• Descent from Space
• Pathogenic Invaders
• The Viral Connection
• History of a Disease
• Spread of a Virus
• Anatomy of an Epidemic
• Isolation and Pandemics
• Plagues Past and Present
• Disease Against Mankind
• Viruses and Evolution
• Diseases from Space
• Bibliography
• Appendices:
  • Organic Materials in Space
  • The Survival of Cometary Cells and Viruses in Passing to the Earth
  • The Interpretation of Genetic Material
  • COVID-19 Pandemic: A Challenge for Humanity
• Index

https://twitter.com/x/status/1528266911603208194

https://twitter.com/x/status/1528238961113456640

The oppositions of reality:

https://twitter.com/x/status/1528240009328869376

 

[XPan]

As of lately, I often bump

into similar headlines like "Monkeypox could have 'massive impact' on sexual health services, doctor warns" - e.g. the reference of monkeypox being a serious sexual transmissive disease... even outlining the target being bisexuals and homosexuals (even here in Sweden I read about it, too, in one alt media newspaper, which I assume is more of a controlled opposition because they too, were all over Corona in the very beginning, almost worse than mainstream, pushing extreme fear) [By their fruits you shall know them]

From what I understand, the normal variant of monkey pox seem to be rather reluctant to transmit into humans.

Does the PTB trying to find a new replacement (or complement) for the "hiv causes AIDS" theory ?! Another card in the game of trying to convince people not to have sex, avoiding to make babies, popping pills and shots - so that their hotly desired population reduction more likely comes to fruition ?

Boy, this "shipping of evil projects" never seem to end, now does it ? (At least not for the time being).

 

[ryu]

As of lately, I often bump

into similar headlines like "Monkeypox could have 'massive impact' on sexual health services, doctor warns" - e.g. the reference of monkeypox being a serious sexual transmissive disease... even outlining the target being bisexuals and homosexuals (even here in Sweden I read about it, too, in one alt media newspaper, which I assume is more of a controlled opposition because they too, were all over Corona in the very beginning, almost worse than mainstream, pushing extreme fear) [By their fruits you shall know them]

From what I understand, the normal variant of monkey pox seem to be rather reluctant to transmit into humans.

Does the PTB trying to find a new replacement (or complement) for the "hiv causes AIDS" theory ?! Another card in the game of trying to convince people not to have sex, avoiding to make babies, popping pills and shots - so that their hotly desired population reduction more likely comes to fruition ?

Boy, this "shipping of evil projects" never seem to end, now does it ? (At least not for the time being).

I wasn't around yet when the AIDS scare happened, but I believe this time it could be worse. The population is probably less healthy than in the 80s thanks to GMO, vaccines, pollution and two years of psychological torture.

And there is the fact that the LGBTXYZ-unicorn lobby has dropped all semblance of decency. In the 80s it was only about letting gays live their life without being abused or fired. Now they are pushing sex-Ed and Transgenderism on children without their parent's consent.

That's a receipe for disaster and with the right twisted rethoric, people could be led to think that ALL gays are a "problem". And if people drop like flies, all the better, from the eugenist's POV.

 

[MJF]

I wasn't around yet when the AIDS scare happened, but I believe this time it could be worse. The population is probably less healthy than in the 80s thanks to GMO, vaccines, pollution and two years of psychological torture.

And there is the fact that the LGBTXYZ-unicorn lobby has dropped all semblance of decency. In the 80s it was only about letting gays live their life without being abused or fired. Now they are pushing sex-Ed and Transgenderism on children without their parent's consent.

That's a receipe for disaster and with the right twisted rethoric, people could be led to think that ALL gays are a "problem". And if people drop like flies, all the better, from the eugenist's POV.

I was around in the 1980's and I can tell you that many originally looked upon AIDS as a gay disease and a just retribution or punishment for their promiscuity. Hence, I think you are right in proposing that we could see a re-run of the 80's with gays being viewed again as the problem.

 

[MJF]

It is 4am here in Argentina. I'm having some trouble sleeping, so I grabbed my cell phone and started watching some video on YT. To my surprise thunderbolts project uploaded this video 7 hours ago!

And I think @ark will be interested. Magnetic fields, vortices, geometry, spirals.

I hope your trouble sleeping is not because your mind is becoming overactive. You have posted a lot of good stuff here recently but this all takes time and mental effort. I am a retired man who has the spare time to research at his leisure and write posts for this Forum. It is essential for good health to get a full compliment of sleep, particularly if you are holding down a day job. If I have misjudged your situation, my apologies but as someone who once had a very stressful job, I know that it can be hard to sleep when your mind becomes overactive.