Hi, this is a slightly long post on my recent tobacco experience.
I recently restarted smoking again and today is day 28. I've been using American Spirit and began with small rolling papers. I was fairly apprehensive as to the effect the tobacco would have now that I'm off the SAD. As well as that, it's been 13 and a bit years since my last smoke which, at the time, was on the SAD and funnily enough my health rapidly deteriorated over those next few months. Perhaps some unconscious fear and associations lay waiting as memories of that period of my life were truly bad.
Anyhow, my first day simply overwhelmed me after the initial joy of breathing in, and not ending up in coughing fits like a newb ;) but I decided to just test it out for a while since after all, I began smoking very young (on an SAD) and now I'm on a "recovery road" to a state called healthy. After smoking just the one on that first day I proceeded to smoking two on the next, which was a substantial leap thinking about it now, and even at the time. I was looking for a general level of intolerance (going on the amount of tobacco used) over a few days and one of tolerance too. So I rolled one before work and smoked it on the way to the bus stop which was great for a minute or two. For some reason I started to do belly breathing (I have no idea why but I do tend to do this when walking or sitting - when there's isn't much to do at work, or just sitting on the bus) which made me quite dizzy. Not good. I smoked a similar amount (again with small papers) after work and minus the belly breathing. I wasn't dizzy and it was a better experience.
Day three and I was very exact and deliberate in the amount of tobacco I used and the way I rolled it. Again, one before work and one after. Incrementally better before work, more so after. I thought then, and still do, that because I decided to walk to another bus stop (the furthest away from me - approximately 25 minutes away) I evened out the length of the drags and walked slower, also not re-lighting the thing immediately after it went out. On the bus I did sleep though (it's my favourite bus as I like the peace -virtually no one on it the whole journey! - and although I sleep around 7 hours a day regularly, I still need more) and I repeated this two-a-day scenario until the tobacco ran out, which was 14 days.
Since then, my rolling is better (thankfully) and my judging of the amount used is better as well. I've changed to large rolling papers (it's just easier) as my body doesn't seem to be saying "no" anymore and it's definitely requiring more. I also realized that I should take smaller drags which helps with the taste and the eventual harshness on the throat toward the end. Last week I was at a friend's and he gave me filters for free. (I'd mentioned getting some come payday)
This coincided with the first time since I restarted that I had to buy more in a short time. That is to say, the first pouch lasted 14 days straight (rolling two a day apart from day one) the next lasted 9 - which was last Friday, and I needed more as I was, and am comfortable with smoking tobacco at my current level. So I opened this new batch and used the filter which made rolling so easy and nice and tight. I could barely believe the difference! The smoke was so smooth and there were no problems with harshness smoking it to the end. The annoying taste was... pleasant. :D
Afterward or even during that smoke I was thinking of rolling another, it was that enjoyable. There were only around 6 filters that he gave, so I've been rationing them until I get money. There's no way I'm using roaches again (well, if I must) and I have to take a real big drag to get a big "kick" (sorry, I dunno the terminology. I used slang for these things growing up but I think smokers here will get the meaning) similar to the roaches - without the harshness.
All in all it's been a great 28 days of experimenting and I feel like I'm being reacquainted with a part of me that I left behind. Thanks to all who have contributed to presenting the truth about smoking here, I doubt I would've tried to do this again with the torrent of disinformation out there.
I'm back baby! Now, let's all light up....