Currently in Distress

Looks like the mods took my suggestion for breaking this off from the How Are You Feeling thread, and even took my suggestion for the title: Currently In Distress!šŸ˜‚

Aww, thanks guys!

As for the DMSO, I just received the cream. It was a bit more than I could afford, but I got it for the bruising due to my platelet count being too low. So a juice variant also? With aloe vera? Iā€™m to drink this?
 
Evan said:
Looks like the mods took my suggestion for breaking this off from the How Are You Feeling thread, and even took my suggestion for the title: Currently In Distress!šŸ˜‚

Aww, thanks guys!

As for the DMSO, I just received the cream. It was a bit more than I could afford, but I got it for the bruising due to my platelet count being too low. So a juice variant also? With aloe vera? Iā€™m to drink this?
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I just checked (and reread @Gaby ā€˜s post), and this stuff (at least on Amazon is $30 for 8oz liquid). Thatā€™s $2 per tbsp. I donā€™t have access to cash. I could theoretically blow up my last credit card, which has a $300 limit. But thatā€™s where the dream ends Iā€™m afraid. Plus, I need that card to keep my Wi-Fi connection or Iā€™m cut off from you at Cass. Thatā€™s worse than the hospital.
 
Evan said:
I just checked (and reread @Gaby ā€˜s post), and this stuff (at least on Amazon is $30 for 8oz liquid). Thatā€™s $2 per tbsp. I donā€™t have access to cash. I could theoretically blow up my last credit card, which has a $300 limit. But thatā€™s where the dream ends Iā€™m afraid. Plus, I need that card to keep my Wi-Fi connection or Iā€™m cut off from you at Cass. Thatā€™s worse than the hospital.
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I'm going to send you a direct message so you can share your address with me. We'll ship you a couple bottles.
 
T.C. said:
So, going back to what you were talking about in your first posts about thisā€¦

It sounds like you are in a place where you feel you are responsible for your medical condition, and for the problems it has caused you and your partner, and that the cause of the condition together with the consequences will lead to you having your soul smashed after you transition. Thatā€™s what you meant when you were talking about losing your memories and experiences.

Is that right?
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Yes @T.C. thatā€™s about the size of it. I feel like Iā€™ve smashed my life, and therefore my soul trip to 5D might not be the ā€œreviewā€ and ā€œdegaussā€ we all expect, but straight to the shredder, so to say. I do feel like Iā€™ve spent my life as a peacemaker, always being the voice of reason when friends were having troubles. Always the designated shoulder to cry on. All of my school teachers said I should have been a lawyer. I decided to be a musician. And so, as an example of faking it till making it, I partied like a rock star, and in the process have all but killed my body and countless brain cells. I did more acid than Garcia. Many long journeys in the desert. I even lived in a Coptic Monastery for a time, and seriously considered the way of the monk. I ended up right back at home, leading an even better band, packing clubs and trading my earnings for my bar tab. Then who should show up at a local gig, on my birthday no less, than the girl with the big green eyes who hung out in my familyā€™s pizza place at the beach? You guessed it, Wendy. That was the beginning of the third chapter of my life. Iā€™m on the cusp of the fourth, and hereā€™s whatā€™s become my thread, playing out in the eyes and thoughts of the community that I call my other home. So thatā€™s the ā€œshortā€ version.šŸ¤£
 
That short resume is very inspiring; your life is worthy of an indie feature film. Denis Villeneuve would make something awesome. All your memories would then be preserved forever :)
If ever you have time and strength, you should write your memoirs...
 
meadow_wind said:
That short resume is very inspiring; your life is worthy of an indie feature film. Denis Villeneuve would make something awesome. All your memories would then be preserved forever :)
If ever you have time and strength, you should write your memoirs...
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Iā€™ve been told this many times by many people. Iā€™ve always felt like it would be self indulgent. Itā€™s true however, that whenever I make a new friend, like the gentleman in the hospital bed next to mine, I always seem to find something that we have in common. For example, this guy was visited by a buddy, and they start on the Pacific Electric Railway built by Samuel Huntington that basically made the Los Angeles-Santa Ana area into a network of communities. Well, my dad was an avid model railroader, and so began a week of getting to know each other. Our parents were born in the same East Coast cities. I knew the punchlines to all of his jokes. He worked in the adjacent building on the campus of Cal State Long Beach that my dad had his office in for 30 years. He an engineer, my father a physicist. And on it went. This seems to happen with virtually everyone with whom I wind up in a conversation.

In the end it always comes down to ā€œYou should write a book of your life.ā€ Itā€™s oddly common. And positively daunting. I can talk all day. Perhaps into a recorder? Imagine what Wendy (or the neighbors) would think! Itā€™d definitely be weird. But maybe I should just get on with it. I actually have a micro recorder that I got for taking down song ideas. I could dig it out.
 
Evan said:
I can talk all day. Perhaps into a recorder?
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Even better! Less strain than writing. Be sure to archive everything in an accessible way (online) so that one day, the right person might take on the project. Or delegate it to an artist friend you trust.
Mega.nz has a big online free storage. You could give your account link to the forum mods.
Also, if you find any pictures that would add to the story, add them to the folder. If they are "old pictures", take digital pictures of them. Easier said than done with your level of pain and discomfort, but I'm just throwing ideas at you that might help keep you busy with something positive during your better days.
 
Evan said:
I greatly appreciate the advice on curatives @Gaby @iamthatis . @T.C. Yes, exactly!

Well, last night I cooked her some dinner, and spoke quietly about the realities of my medical opinions: Stay off pain meds and get on the transplant list, or ā€œstay comfortableā€ and wait until they put me into hospice. Which would be the bigger impact on her in the house. Her reply was that if I were to stay off the pain meds, we might be okay. Honestly this would be the best of all possible outcomes. Then it occurred to me that the only reason I canā€™t take acetaminophen is that it damages my liver. So what? Iā€™m already decompensated, so the thing is basically dead anyway. Whatā€™s it gonna do? Cause more acites? Increase my portal hypertension? So what? That just jumps me up the list. So thatā€™s the question: can I just take enough non-opioid pain medicine to combat my chronic spine pain that itā€™s bearable? I guess weā€™re going to find out.
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--Stay off pain meds and get on the transplant list, or ā€œstay comfortableā€ and wait until they put me into hospice. Which would be the bigger impact on her in the house. Her reply was that if I were to stay off the pain meds, we might be okay. Honestly this would be the best of all possible outcomes.---

hope you get some valuable co ordinates at you meeing with doctor on tuesday Evan.

Ive met more than 10 people who ve had succesful liver transplants - and now have a decent quality of life - inspite of the meds involved long term.
- I know its a challenge to let go of speculation and possible scenarios -ultimately the decision to have the liver transplant is a complete surrender to God/Jesus /your Higher Power , let go and let God ! You are much loved -be strong

youre much in my thoughts and prayers
 
EmeraldR said:
--Stay off pain meds and get on the transplant list, or ā€œstay comfortableā€ and wait until they put me into hospice. Which would be the bigger impact on her in the house. Her reply was that if I were to stay off the pain meds, we might be okay. Honestly this would be the best of all possible outcomes.---

hope you get some valuable co ordinates at you meeing with doctor on tuesday Evan.

Ive met more than 10 people who ve had succesful liver transplants - and now have a decent quality of life - inspite of the meds involved long term.
- I know its a challenge to let go of speculation and possible scenarios -ultimately the decision to have the liver transplant is a complete surrender to God/Jesus /your Higher Power , let go and let God ! You are much loved -be strong

youre much in my thoughts and prayers
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Thank you so very much @EmeraldR !

Just soā€™s you know, my 23andMe (I was adopted at birth) says Iā€™m 83% Counties Mayo, Cork, Donegal, Dublin, Cavan, Clair, Sligo, and Roscommon. I ainā€™t entirely green, but the liver sure saw its (and many others) share of Guinness, Jamey, Bushmills, Tullamore, and Redbreast. Good lord itā€™s been a ride! The landing is the tough bit.
 
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