Éiriú-Eolas - Breathing Program

[forge]

Their is no need to have a defensive strategy such as yours when all you need to do is just observe the predators mind and see it for what it is.
The gap that forms is the line between you (the real you) and it. The clearer you see the line, the less power it has over you until it has none left.
This is my current understanding and I may be mistaken.
Hang on in there forge, your doing fine :)

I asked myself after the predator left: Is this really what i have become?
I clearly saw that no, i let out the monster from the cage too early, i thought I am strong enough to fight it already. No, i grew a lot stronger from that almost invisible weak flickering little light that i was, thanks to Laura and Eiriu Eolas, but i'm not yet strong enough: the Predator kicked my rears - not so bad as it would have liked, of course i was vehemently resisting, all in all, these defeats that concern me, are not so bad as in the past, at all. There is definitely a development, the Predator cannot hurt me so bad as it could in the past. For a moment i saw and i will saw a second time, as Jeanne de Salzmann wrote. I just foolishly called out the Predator too early for the Ultimate Fight.

RedFox, your post was helpful, thank you. I think Eiriu Eolas gives me the chance to throw off all sickness of mind, strip it off like and old filthy mantle, BE HEALED and finally become victorious in the main task that was accepted before birth, i think.

 

[Ollie]

My experience of the E-E Breathing-Meditation programme over the last week is that as well as zoning out in the evening sessions (Monday and Thursday), I also managed to zone out in one or two of the morning meditation sessions too. Thanks to RedFox and his breathing tip.

Also, I have had some ‘waking dreams’ for a change, and have partial recall.

The first one was about a wide path being made around my ‘dwelling’, that restricted how much land I could use for cultivating vegetables (I have a very small garden encroached from the general green lawn that surrounds the buildings). I recently read Iron John by Robert Bly, that suggests that in mythology garden implies walled garden – a temporary shelter in which to recover, to study, to encounter the wealth of the psyche, a cultivation of the new out of the old and of yearning and longing. Any ideas what else it might mean, or if there is agreement with this?

On Tuesday, the main gist of the dream was the successful merging of old ritual words with new words – any ideas what this might mean? A little later, and this may be a ‘conscious dream’ rather than a waking dream; I was wounded in the shoulder by a bullet saving someone. Again, from Bly, this implies revelation of true identity. Does any one have any/other ideas on this interpretation of this ‘possible’ dream?

 

[vinny]

I've been doing the full EE program on a regular basis for quite some time now, and I thought I would add a little of my own feedback. Since starting the program, I have had been able to work through a lot of emotional cloudiness, to regress back through my life and clearly see the dynamic at various stages of development; see how various programming was put in place, see the effects of my behaviour, see the kind of 'domino' effect of falling for one particular trap or another or how experiencing various childhood traumas has lead to further blockages and/or escalated lessons, how my emotional evolution has been mechanically steered this way and that, how all sorts of blockages were created, and how difficulties at one particular time would lead to knock-on effects in another area; all in all achieved an astounding all-round clarity on the story of my life thus far. This doesn't mean that I am free of my programming, but it has hugely increased my ability to self observe, in the moment, and also to understand the longer-term context of it.

What I've been 'asking for' during this process, is the clarity to see all this, and the ability to navigate my way through it, to heal past wounds, in order to open up the possibility for natural development of myself towards the better person that I might be, to realise more of my full creative potential. The main thing I've experienced, other than greatly improved emotional control and awareness, is an enormous number of dreams, which I have tried to document in my journal. What seems to be happening, is that my dreams are providing me with something specific - they are taking me back through my life to different developmental stages where I missed/failed a particular lesson or where already-established programs/traumas inhibited my potential for natural growth at that point and caused further problems, and allowing me to re-live all sorts of scenarious, in order to process them properly and to have the opportunity to 'grow up' by kinda 're-sitting the course', to come to a better understanding of why things were as they were, and exploring different choices and behaviours and, for example, the denied needs of the 'inner child' and also the inner 'younger adult' at various points in the formation and development of the personality. I think in the long term that, in combination with the body of intellectual psychological knowledge available here, it has huge potential for positive change, which I have already started to experience.

 

[RedFox]

Just a small update to add. I've been trying to get back into doing the full program Mondays and Thursdays....I managed it once or twice, cut out the Round Breathing part again, and last night (due to great tiredness) ended up feeling frustrated I couldn't do the full program, so opted to do just a set of pipe breathing the and the POTS before bed (i.e. the last part of the program).
Oddly it seems that this is all I need to do right now. I've yet to try doing the three stage breathing/warriors breath in the mornings but it seems that I have the best results just doing the pipe breathing and POTS at night.
Like Nomad I've had loads of dreams, very vivid and colourful and they have a particular flavour to them that's almost tangable. I've noticed that this flavour (for want of a better word....its like an internal tension/sweetness in my stomach, chest and head) is now carrying with me into waking hours. I've noticed a few dreams being like Nomads (revisiting missed lessons) but mostly they just seem to be of large scale changes, support and networking....

The first one was about a wide path being made around my ‘dwelling’, that restricted how much land I could use for cultivating vegetables (I have a very small garden encroached from the general green lawn that surrounds the buildings). I recently read Iron John by Robert Bly, that suggests that in mythology garden implies walled garden – a temporary shelter in which to recover, to study, to encounter the wealth of the psyche, a cultivation of the new out of the old and of yearning and longing. Any ideas what else it might mean, or if there is agreement with this?

Well, from the point of view of the POTS and 'be my daily bread'.....perhaps this road is not incroaching on your 'food supply' but rather bringing a new one? A widening of the path suggests a greater transport capacity.......receivership capacity??

On Tuesday, the main gist of the dream was the successful merging of old ritual words with new words – any ideas what this might mean?

Rituals being something that ultimately feeds 4D STS.....words representing thoughts perhaps? So old 4D STS feeding thought loops being replaced with new thoughts (words)? A change in belief structure perhaps?

A little later, and this may be a ‘conscious dream’ rather than a waking dream; I was wounded in the shoulder by a bullet saving someone. Again, from Bly, this implies revelation of true identity. Does any one have any/other ideas on this interpretation of this ‘possible’ dream?

Another possibility is a past life memory/trauma? I don't have Leouse Hays book to hand to see what that may say about shoulder injuries.....what side was it? Maybe this injury would have manifest as a real one if the lines of communication hadn't been widened? :)

 

[Ollie]

Thanks for your thoughts RedFox.

The first one was about a wide path being made around my ‘dwelling’, that restricted how much land I could use for cultivating vegetables (I have a very small garden encroached from the general green lawn that surrounds the buildings). I recently read Iron John by Robert Bly, that suggests that in mythology garden implies walled garden – a temporary shelter in which to recover, to study, to encounter the wealth of the psyche, a cultivation of the new out of the old and of yearning and longing. Any ideas what else it might mean, or if there is agreement with this?

Well, from the point of view of the POTS and 'be my daily bread'.....perhaps this road is not incroaching on your 'food supply' but rather bringing a new one? A widening of the path suggests a greater transport capacity.......receivership capacity??

On Tuesday, the main gist of the dream was the successful merging of old ritual words with new words – any ideas what this might mean?

Rituals being something that ultimately feeds 4D STS.....words representing thoughts perhaps? So old 4D STS feeding thought loops being replaced with new thoughts (words)? A change in belief structure perhaps?

A little later, and this may be a ‘conscious dream’ rather than a waking dream; I was wounded in the shoulder by a bullet saving someone. Again, from Bly, this implies revelation of true identity. Does any one have any/other ideas on this interpretation of this ‘possible’ dream?

Another possibility is a past life memory/trauma? I don't have Leouse Hays book to hand to see what that may say about shoulder injuries.....what side was it? Maybe this injury would have manifest as a real one if the lines of communication hadn't been widened?

For the path, putting the two ideas together, a possibility is that I’m on a wider path to gaining psychic understanding. I like the idea of receivership (I’ll just accept that as wishful thinking at the moment).

For the ritual words, a change in belief structure would fit in with the outcome of practicing PotS.

Ref Louise Hay: Shoulders – Represent our ability to carry out experiences in life joyously. We make life a burden by our attitude.
Right side of the body - Giving out, letting go, masculine energy, men, the father.

Possibly, then, letting go (at long last!) and experiencing joy for a change, or ‘feeling’ any positive emotion: moving from being ‘emotionally constipated’ to real emotional centre emotions. I'll keep a hold on reality until it happens!

 

[Gertrudes]

An update on EE:

I am now doing the full program on Mondays and Thursdays, except for when time doesn't permit and I shift days around. I do, however, listen to tracks 4 and 5 of the meditation CD very, very often (corresponding to the prayer of the soul track 4, and the music, track 5). I find them to be extremely soothing.

I have noticed that I am more aware of what I feel. It really is something big for me, as I spent years convinced I was feeling something, when in reality I had been feeling something different all along. I have been dealing with strong feelings of anger over the past months. It seems to be clearer where they stem from. Curiously, I find myself getting angry for just about anything. But when tracking anger down, it usually comes from much, much deeper, and from much older events then the ones triggering the anger episode in the present time.

Despite the fact that I have been feeling angry lately, my partner curiously says I am much lesser. We have been discussing this for a while now, and it might be that because I am more aware of my feelings of anger, I am beginning not to project them to others. I have struggled hard since I realized that I had such a can of angry worms inside, and somehow try to direct this angry energy in a manner that is more constructive and considerate to others. Perhaps I feel my anger more, without necessarily manifesting it? Or it can also be that I just wish it to be so...I hope to learn how discern that.
Addressing this anger is helping me to address responsibility to the events that generated it. I am not at all close to be able to not become unnecessarily angry, but I feel that I can more easily observe what is going on, and what might be the real trigger for that anger.

Apart from that, I have actually been feeling good. People have been telling me that I look well, as in really healthy. The diet and supplements are making such a difference! It is positively affecting my own self respect. In other words, I feel that I am beginning to understand what it can be to respect oneself, and that starts (not only, but also) on how I feed my body.

What I've been 'asking for' during this process, is the clarity to see all this, and the ability to navigate my way through it, to heal past wounds, in order to open up the possibility for natural development of myself towards the better person that I might be, to realise more of my full creative potential.

Very inspiring Nomad :)
My wish has been to HEAL, whatever it is that needs healing.
I feel that only through healing past wounds will I be able achieve a certain degree of clarity, and begin to understand what I truly wish.

Edit: added a sentence

 

[cubbex]

It is okay to just do one of the three parts of the BA-HA part, because I feel so tired when I'm doing it, one day doing this and the prayer I got sleep like 5 minutes, and then I just got sleep again like 15 minutes doing the prayer or meditation, I think but I'm not so sure, that is because the Bah-ha

My experience of the E-E Breathing-Meditation programme over the last week is that as well as zoning out in the evening sessions (Monday and Thursday), I also managed to zone out in one or two of the morning meditation sessions too. Thanks to RedFox and his breathing tip.

Also, I have had some ‘waking dreams’ for a change, and have partial recall.

The first one was about a wide path being made around my ‘dwelling’, that restricted how much land I could use for cultivating vegetables (I have a very small garden encroached from the general green lawn that surrounds the buildings). I recently read Iron John by Robert Bly, that suggests that in mythology garden implies walled garden – a temporary shelter in which to recover, to study, to encounter the wealth of the psyche, a cultivation of the new out of the old and of yearning and longing. Any ideas what else it might mean, or if there is agreement with this?

On Tuesday, the main gist of the dream was the successful merging of old ritual words with new words – any ideas what this might mean? A little later, and this may be a ‘conscious dream’ rather than a waking dream; I was wounded in the shoulder by a bullet saving someone. Again, from Bly, this implies revelation of true identity. Does any one have any/other ideas on this interpretation of this ‘possible’ dream?

There is a good article you could read to get a reference:
http://www.cassiopaea.org/cass/dreams_disinformation.htm

Laura talks about dreams and more.

 

[ElizabethDempsey]

Cleanse my heart that I may know the holiness of true existence, divine Cosmic Mind.

I've had so many life-transforming revelations lately regarding the holiness of true existence that I can only say, "Thank You, divine Cosmic Mind."

 

[gotogo]

Just for a short report:
I practice the pipe breathing at least one par day. It is a really good method to calm down my body and mind.
I practice the warrior excise occasionally after the pipe breathing, usually in the morning on week ends. 　
For the Ba-Ha excise, I do it with mediation mp3 when I see something stuck in my emotional center.
And once a while, I do the full excise. It does not become a 'routine' but I keep coming back when I felt necessity.
For now, it seems this way works best for me.

A short story:
I had been practicing the breathing excises while I am traveling in Japan also and 'unexpectedly' my mother showed an interest just one day before I leave Japan.
She is 71 years old, although suffered by 'multiple myeloma' 5 years ago now seem healthier then before. :) So I practiced with her together for just pipe breathing and gave a copied CD to her. I hope we can practice together when I move back to Japan in early this Summer.

 

[abstract]

to regress back through my life and clearly see the dynamic at various stages of development; see how various programming was put in place, see the effects of my behaviour, see the kind of 'domino' effect of falling for one particular trap or another or how experiencing various childhood traumas has lead to further blockages and/or escalated lessons, how my emotional evolution has been mechanically steered this way and that, how all sorts of blockages were created, and how difficulties at one particular time would lead to knock-on effects in another area;

I noticed this to...every other day lately i'm recalling some sort of childhood memory that i thought i had forgotten, and other memories connected to it and how this led to that.

I'm getting closer to the source of my anger and unhappiness as time goes on. EE sessions seem to be slowly getting more eventful, last monday nite i had that thumping in the
middle of the head during POTS, very prounounced and noticable actually.

 

[Ollie]

My experience of the E-E Breathing-Meditation programme over the last week is that as well as zoning out in the evening sessions (Monday and Thursday), I also managed to zone out in one or two of the morning meditation sessions too. Thanks to RedFox and his breathing tip.

Also, I have had some ‘waking dreams’ for a change, and have partial recall.

The first one was about a wide path being made around my ‘dwelling’, that restricted how much land I could use for cultivating vegetables (I have a very small garden encroached from the general green lawn that surrounds the buildings). I recently read Iron John by Robert Bly, that suggests that in mythology garden implies walled garden – a temporary shelter in which to recover, to study, to encounter the wealth of the psyche, a cultivation of the new out of the old and of yearning and longing. Any ideas what else it might mean, or if there is agreement with this?

On Tuesday, the main gist of the dream was the successful merging of old ritual words with new words – any ideas what this might mean? A little later, and this may be a ‘conscious dream’ rather than a waking dream; I was wounded in the shoulder by a bullet saving someone. Again, from Bly, this implies revelation of true identity. Does any one have any/other ideas on this interpretation of this ‘possible’ dream?

There is a good article you could read to get a reference:
http://www.cassiopaea.org/cass/dreams_disinformation.htm

Laura talks about dreams and more.

Thank you for the reference, I'll look into it.

 

[RGG]

EE program did not go well today due to a nasty allergic reaction to fresh coconut milk. Blaaahh... :(, maybe I'll try again later when I feel better- sorry guys.

Rx

 

[EdgeofDawn]

I had a strange experience recently. After finishing the whole program, I rolled over on to my side, closed my eyes and tried to go to sleep. Suddenly I was in a clearing in a forest or jungle. There was some sort of black and white animal in front of me. Maybe a large dog or big cat? Anyway, it saw me and came charging at me. As it leaped to attack me, I freaked out and opened my eyes! Later that night I had a dream that I was standing in the clouds watching shamans pull forum members up into the clouds, where they were giving them some sort of initiation..

 

[RedFox]

I had a strange experience recently. After finishing the whole program, I rolled over on to my side, closed my eyes and tried to go to sleep. Suddenly I was in a clearing in a forest or jungle. There was some sort of black and white animal in front of me. Maybe a large dog or big cat? Anyway, it saw me and came charging at me. As it leaped to attack me, I freaked out and opened my eyes! Later that night I had a dream that I was standing in the clouds watching shamans pull forum members up into the clouds, where they were giving them some sort of initiation..

Definitely sounds like a shamanic experience John. Also I think your reaction to the big cat was probably the right one!

Have been feeling pretty emotional recently....and mostly feeling that I am currently incapable of doing many things (hopefully not so much in a self pity way)....I've been feeling pretty dissatisfied and depressed (I've been practicing the advice in the depression as a stepping stone thread) about how my life currently is. It came on pretty strong last night after my mom asked me (she asked last year too) if I had managed to sort a pension or savings out.....I said no.
Everything in my life generally seems to be a holding pattern for avoiding my emotions...or doing anything other than trying to be a child still....one who is petrified of emotions. Its like my whole life is a lie.
I've also been terrified of (perhaps?) experiencing the emotional release Laura has writtern about.....I think this is related to my weight loss too....I am avoiding facing my emotions and my body is trying to tell me that I face them or else.....each time I think (and it is 'think') about a possible emotional release I get scared of being out of control...and not being able to hide it from my parents.

I was determined to do the full program last night, and despite what I was feeling I was extremely focused through out the whole thing. Very little mental chatter.
During the 3 stage breathing I started getting effects that I usually get in the POTS section....light and images. More so I started to see/understand how my fear of being emotional in front of my parents comes right from day one....from trying to meet my mothers (and probably fathers) emotional needs....mine are diminished and theres are exaggerated beyond all proportion. I could see how the E-E program has been rebuilding my sense of emotional safety up until this point....and now I feel safe enough to look a little I can understand the source of it. I could see how many events in my life have all conspired to shut me down emotionally.
My solar plexus and forhead where throbbing in rhythm by the time I came to start the POTS after the round breathing.

I slept badly....thinking about it now I think (theres that 'think' word again) that part of me perhaps was keeping vigil over my emotions out of fear....
I'm not sure if I should back off doing the full program again or not. Part of me wants to push through this...but I'm not sure if that's the part of me that can drive me to hard so I can label myself a 'failure'. Hmm
Perhaps sticking to just doing the POTS alone before bed again is the way to go....I wish it didn't feel like I was just spinning my wheels.

 

[forge]

Anybody noticed the distinct energy build-ups before and around beginning EE Mondays and Thursdays? Almost as if a network is being established, Eiriu Eolas Prayers connecting in an act of lifting, helping, supporting each other? Like warmth of sunshine just this works at night? The cleansing effect of EE seems increased. As if this EE-field or something would have consciousness or FRV and everyone who strives to be aligned with it and comes in contact is getting actually aligned more, cleansed, lifted, filled up with this new positive energy. Satiating in a spiritual way. Different from FIR effects.
Unbelievable.