Éiriú-Eolas - Breathing Program

[Devar]

I know I am late with this, but I have finally started the breathing exercises as of last night (Monday night for me). I am yet to go back and read through all of the last 70 pages in this topic!

I did not see any faces or visions, however one thing that was strange was that I was very squeamish during the round breathing. It was like something of me was trying to resist and escape! :O The Pipe breathing was very good and I must admit that I must have fallen asleep during the fourth repition of the prayer. Only to wake up this morning when my alarm went off, lights still on and all... Laura, you sent me to sleep!

I am very glad I have started the exercises. :)

 

[Username]

I was waiting to read all the posts before writing, but I see that this is an almost impossible task, and an excuse to not posting, so here's a short report of my experience. I've been practicing the program almost since it was given by Laura (thank you so much Laura!), the first weeks in a very intensive way, almost every day and since last week only on Mondays and Thursdays. I must say that although I haven't have any too unusual experiences, I have had many of the things that have been reported: heat flows going through the body, specially through the forearms and shoulders, irritability, increased sensitivity, serenity immediately after doing the programm. I also remember that one of the first times that I did the program I felt a very intense sensation never felt before. It was like being caught in a whirlwind of energy that penetrated my body and made him wobble, something really intense, after finishing the baha part. Could it have anything to do with the energy spirals that Ra describes?
Besides I have heard two times in my head a sound similiar of somethings that brakes, like a "crack", similar but not identical to the sound produced in the ears by sudden changes in the atmospheric pressure (as when a plane goes up or down quickly). In any case, it is somewhat difficult to describe. I must also say that I have had to battle hard against the internal noise...
I also have a question: is the place where one practices important? I remember reading in the Ra Material (or was it in a book by Barbara Marciniak? I'm pretty sure it was in Ra) an advice to not to sleep or be placed in corners, that somehow corners block ther energy or something like that. Well, as it happens, I use to do the program on my bed, which is in a corner of my room...

 

[RyanAM]

After doing the meditation and trying to go to sleep, i was completely startled and freaked out when it felt like something from my kidney felt as if it moved up past my rib area, i sat there laying for awhile when it felt as if i was moving inside my own body, so i started imaging i was turning my head without doing it and i could feel my head moving without physically moving it, anyway it was a little scary even though i was quite relaxed. My head also hurts some but its not like a headache type feeling, i have a lot of perspiration coming off my body and i feel anxious or nervous or something, i cannot sleep.

 

[Human]

Hi again!

Be careful if you use the edge of your bed. It may not give as much support as a chair. I tried using my bed and the warrior's breath had me bouncing like a trampoline!

Just to be safe, I'd use a chair.

I'm sitting on the floor and while doing it, the furniture is shaking a little bit.
But it's a funny thought imagining doing it on the bed, but I cannot remember right now if I tried it also... ;)

As my wife last night unexpectedly went to sleep earlier than usual, I've used the edge of a couch for EE session (first checked if any noise or undesired movements would occur when doing Warrior's breath :)). It was much more relaxing and it went smoother than before when I had been doing it cross-legged on the bed (or sometimes couch), so probably continue like this for some time...

So, I suspect that all the thrill about EE program in "sage position" may be just reflection of my wishful thinking (maybe program that "I'm something special, because I've been doing it for so "long", and now even implemented something new in it" has been activated).

I hope this doesn’t confuse matters, but it may also be that you feel most comfortable sitting with your spine straight and unsupported, and that you’re using that as a focus for self-importance. I love doing the program on a kneeling stool, which helps to maintain that posture in a relaxed way. There are various designs of kneeling stool or kneeling chair. Have a look at these websites to see the sort of thing I mean:

_http://www.sitkneelchairs.co.uk/default.asp?

_http://www.bluebanyan.co.uk/jsp/main.jsp?lnk=130

Thanks, have one of those little ones (been using it while trying to do EE in posture of the sage, but I just couldn't relax).

Also, last night spent some time contemplating about everything written here, and a matter of trust (or Faith as said by Mouravieff) emerged. It seems that I have inherent/intrisic problem with accepting and doing things as they are done/said, and "always" have to change/modify something before putting them into practice. As a consequence of this, Ego exults (and I just let that happen :().


Regarding experience during EE session: strange feeling of emptiness almost totally disappeared and for third time in a row buzzing sound in ears appeared during beatha part; since last two weeks feeling like having a stopper/blockage on the root of the nose (point where your nose ends and forehead begins) and last night, together with that, a spark (localized heat) on top of the forehead appeared.


Thank you all (specially You, Laura!), for sharing remarkable gift of EE program and making it possible experience all this things...

 

[Laura]

I've just posted the most recent session which has some remarks/advice about the breathing/meditation:

http://www.cassiopaea.org/forum/index.php?topic=13716.0

 

[RedFox]

After doing the meditation and trying to go to sleep, i was completely startled and freaked out when it felt like something from my kidney felt as if it moved up past my rib area, i sat there laying for awhile when it felt as if i was moving inside my own body, so i started imaging i was turning my head without doing it and i could feel my head moving without physically moving it, anyway it was a little scary even though i was quite relaxed. My head also hurts some but its not like a headache type feeling, i have a lot of perspiration coming off my body and i feel anxious or nervous or something, i cannot sleep.

Hi RyanAM
Perhaps go outside and take a few deep slow breaths of fresh air. Also try staying outside until you feel cooler. This always helped me in the past if I couldn't sleep.
I remember an earlier discussion in the thread talking about feeling things move (a blockage?) on the right hand side of the body under the ribs. The conclusion was that it could be an emotional blockage.
The program does appear to be physically detoxing so it may well be related as well.

I used the CD version of the program last night copied onto my mp3 player. Some interesting things happened.
Firstly I had a sense that the whole thing seemed crisper (not the sound, although it was)....more focused perhaps? Secondly part of my actually got quite frustrated with some of the changes on the CD version. I had to stop that part of me from taking over...lol
The extension to the prayer section was really welcome, and I followed it all the way through without zoning out. At the beginning I could sort of see (Although my eyes where closed) what appeared to be star. I even thought I saw Cassiopeia too. I'd forgotten about trying to hold on to a point of light at this point.
Doing my own repetition's afterwards to the music track was really good and I felt myself going a lot deeper than I've done before (I felt like I was floating in the warmth).
At least until the battery in my mp3 player died and it cut out mid way through

I woke up in the morning feeling the exact same level of warmth. Started to drift back to sleep at which point I distinctly heard a female voice say my name quite quizzically. Drifting again and it felt when you start to fall asleep and jerk suddenly because of the sense of falling....but it felt more like someone gave me a gentle shove to wake me up, as there was no sense of falling and I wasn't sure it was me that caused my bed to move

Felt a little like I'd been hit by truck (aching limbs/groggy/tired), but that lifted a bit after the morning detox shake.
I'm in very good spirits this morning (and still feeling the heat all over at the same intensity, although it comes and goes), and am still chuckling at the thought that part of me was trying to wake me up this morning. I probably would have overslept otherwise!

 

[Jeremy F Kreuz]

quote from smaragde

During the breathing meditation parts lately it seems like a struggle to stay focused, as some of you experience, and my mind wants to wander and do its own thing too. Most often is thinking about what i read in the forum, or sott, or a book, trying to convince me that the reasons for its wanderings are noble! Ha! I know better than that.

I have noticed the same: especially during the breathing I tend to wander off and it got worse the last few sessions. Until last night I did not know exactly how to resist this and it just happened over and over. Reading Ouspensky last night before doing the prayer reminded me of being conscious about which center does what. I realized that I was doing the praying in a mechanical way and it seems that that might be the reason why my mind wonders off (the predator mind takes over? - due to mechanical praying - or the moving center takes over something the movement center is not supposed to do). So I decided to be very aware of what I was praying and in the meantime breath more intensively so that I could focus the movement center on what it is supposed to do: breathing, moving the belly up and down. While I was reciting the prayer, I was also focusing on: I am lying here, I am saying this, I am praying. What I realized/experienced was that the payer of the soul can be understood as ´becoming aware´. The phrase 'Holy awareness in all creation' became clearer to me. The Divine cosmic mind lives in one as a holy awareness, in order to know and love the holiness of true existence: awareness of being

The reaction of the predator mind was furious. It unleashed thought after thought trying to interrupt my conscious reciting of the prayer. It also seemed to increase its efforts by pushing thoughts on themes that push my buttons more easily and more intense. It was quiet an ordeal to regain my awareness and pray. At the same time a pain between the eyes developed and a blue circle appeared in the darkness inside my head. Suddenly this blue circle broke open and a immense amount of images rushed through, way too fast to be seen. This lasted for a few seconds. I have no idea of what these images were, as as said, they came too fast. I don't know either whether this was a trick of the predator mind or if it does mean something else. (there are definitely a few I´s that would love to classify this as a positive esoteric experience)

Afterwards I thought that maybe I could slow down this sudden rush of images in order to see them. Has anybody any experience with this kind of phenomena and a idea if and how these sort of rush of images can be slowed down? And whether this is a thing to do or better not to do?

 

[RedFox]

Afterwards I thought that maybe I could slow down this sudden rush of images in order to see them. Has anybody any experience with this kind of phenomena and a idea if and how these sort of rush of images can be slowed down? And whether this is a thing to do or better not to do?

Hi Jeremy
I've had similar thing happen in the past unrelated to the E-E program like this....usually its in dreams where I don't want to see something because its too painful. So it goes by in a flash, even though I 'know' what it was at some level (pain).
Perhaps its better to stay focused on the program as a whole and not get to distracted by different experiences however. For all you know that may be all you needed to process it!
If it wasn't processed then, the way I see it is it will come around again in some way or other and be processed. Maybe through dreams or perhaps thoughts during the day or emotions or sensations in the body etc.
Hope that helps :)

 

[Mountain Crown]

Jeremy,

RedFox's advice is sound. It's a good thing for us to remember Laura saying that we are learning to meditate and focus on the initial purpose of meditation: stilling the mind.

This is facilitated by the impartial observer. Imputing no importance to the wandering/distracting activity of the mind, the observer allows a return to the Prayer - a home base for stilling the waters, and connecting to the Higher Self. Any importance given to the wandering activity is food for the predator's mind. Less food, less strength.

 

[Jeremy F Kreuz]

MC and Redfox,

thanks for the advice. So just allow things to happen.

jeremy

 

[Bluestar]

Hi Forum Members,

Wanting to report some changes in the program for me last night.

During the Ba Ha portion, towards the end, I thought my cat came on the bed and sat across my lower legs & ankles. I did not want to be disturbed so I remained in position and after reading of others experiences with their pets, I just let it be. During the POS meditation I felt a sensation of being in a bit of a void. My forehead above my eyes at center started to tingle & get warm (as posted by others here).

Now since I could remember I have always seen tiny, tiny dots of light. Everywhere I look, eyes open or closed. Sort of like a veneer that I am used to. As a child when trying to fall asleep they would sometimes make shapes of beach balls or umbrellas(?) in colors of green, blue, yellow, red & purple. This has not happen in decades. Last night though as my forehead started to tingle the dots were takeing unrecognizable shapes. The blue hued light popped into the center of my minds eye and I felt peace & gratitude. My body felt heavy, especially where the pressure was from the cat. As Laura's voice brought me out of the meditative state I awoke to nothing lying on me. And I moved the pressure lifted. I felt no fear actually quite ambivalent to it. Thinking maybe it was an unseen critter that meant no harm. Very curious indeed.
Thanks

 

[Zadius Sky]

Hi y'all,

Just wanted to share my experience since my reverberation. Other than the usual "third eye" sensation and body tingling during the program, I haven't had much experience.

But, the one thing that I have noticed this past couple of weeks and strongly so is my emotional reaction to one thing. I have watched tv shows/movie before where emotional content was evident, I hadn't had much of a reaction to it but understood the content of it. But now, I've watched that same show, a rerun, I had a rather strong reaction to it, especially to grief. I've started crying, choking up and my heart was tightened as if *I* was in grief as well. Same thing happened when I've watched Time Traveler's Wife at the local movie theater last week, towards the end of the film, I started crying, my heart tightened, and choking up. I had to blow my nose into my t-shirt, ugh. I was a wreak. I was just glad that I was alone in the theater. It's quite stirring to see this part of me being so evidently strong, and how quickly emotional I got towards grief.

 

[KC Kelly]

Hi Windmill knight...although your response here is addressed to mada85, your description of the book by Dabrowski intrigues me enough to put a hold on this book by the local library system when it becomes available. I have sort of skimmed through some of the threads on here about Dabrowski's work using the "Search" function. Looks like there is much more of interest here than at first glance. Another example of the power of networking! :) Thanks for the tip!

Now if I could only "grow' enough to be in a position to give back, instead of just "take".... :(

At the moment I am (almost done) reading Dabrowski's Personality-shaping Through Positive Disintegration and I find that what he is proposing in psychological terms is very close to Mouravieff's description of the moral bankruptcy and the process of developing a magnetic center. It has been helpful for me because my emotional turmoil - that came along at the time I started breathing and praying, and I suspect in part because of that - has been mostly of a moral nature.

Basically, what Dabrowski calls a multilevel disintegration (which is 'positive' if it bears the result of a reintegration at a higher level), is an inner conflict full of the symptoms that most psychologists would consider psychoneurotic and 'pathological', such as guilt, shame, obsession, depression, anxiety, nervousness, etc. Dabrowski doesn't think they are signs of illness, but signs of the potential of accelerated development. The disintegration is called 'multilevel' (as opposed to 'unilevel') because lower and higher elements of the self are in conflict, i.e. egocentric and primitive instincts vs moral values, humanistic ideals and altero-centrism (altruism).

The conflict can start in different ways, for example with a shock or shocks from external life, but it becomes multilevel only when we realize that we haven't lived up to our own moral standards (thus the term 'moral bankruptcy' seems very appropriate). It can be painful and quite prolonged, lasting months, years or even a lifetime, but it is possible that eventually a conscious directing center together with other psychic dynamisms (which as a whole are more or less M's magnetic center and its functions) will form around the ideal of a new self and begin to reorganize the psyche into what will become the 'Personality' (Dabrowski calls 'personality' the integrated result of this process, so it shouldn't be confused with the 'false personality' of Mouravieff).

Dabrowski mentions a few things which are helpful to achieve the secondary integration, and interestingly, among others: inspirational literature, the help of a qualified educator (in our case, the network), and meditation and contemplation!

 

[Hildegarda]

I have noticed the same: especially during the breathing I tend to wander off and it got worse the last few sessions. Until last night I did not know exactly how to resist this and it just happened over and over.

Same thing was happening to me. My mind would keep going around something I've seen, done, or thought about during the day, and the accompanying mood would go round the loop like that, too. It has gotten better over time. I liked how you worked consciously to counter that, I should try it next time too.

One concern I am having is that I have not yet gotten through the whole meditation without zoning out. First couple of times it happened, I even thought that the file in my mp3 player is defective. I would go through bioenergetic breathing, hear the beginning of the meditation, and next thing I know it's either the part where Laura wraps everything up, or the player is silent. I have read through the thread, and it appears that zoning out is supposed to be a good thing? I am beginning to worry that I am not doing things right once in a zoned-out state ...

 

[treesparrow]

I'm stuck. I simply cannot do most of the warm up exercises because of health reasons ( osteo-arthrits restricts movements of my upper torso and head). :( How necessary are all of these? Is there an alternative regime?