Thank you!
Okay, you all tell me where this ought to go, then... Because on initial pass and reading of what you all classify as C work, this is all very much C work, IMO of course. That said, you all would know better than me. At the end of the day I'm just a strange dude who hears things, so I write them down. You all tell me what to make of this.
**Warning and apologies - I do swear some in my session notes. I will edit that out, but if something slips through I apologize in advance!**
I have 100s of pages, so I don't want to spam you all, but I do feel excited and encouraged to give you some data dumps here, so to speak.
C is me, nn- Is her. Even last night, I'm still not sure what to call her/it. I've asked many, many times, and they just keep telling me to not worry about it, and also the name doesn't matter and translate to 3D anyway.
This session is a sort-of summary of how I came to be where I am today, after about 15 months of gut-wrenching and often times terrifying work on my own. (3D on my own, clearly I'm not on my own when writing)
AKL = Akashic Level. What you all would call 4D+
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2/25/20 Raw Session Notes
C- Two voices that sound/feel like one, until, I guess. You do enough deep work and then notice/feel a subtle difference. One is always positive; one is sometimes positive-ish, but usually with a slight negative overtone, but only where I can now feel after getting to full self-honesty. My personal mission makes a sort of moral-ethical framework around self that I must now operate in, to be sure of my own self-control at all times. Conscious connection to self, IOW. So it’s easy (now) to spot the negative imaginations/manifestations and nip them in the bud. So while ignoring and trying to quiet the voice for a while now, I didn’t realize there is a different internal voice I connect with. Dream-voice me… This is where I think we are on to something more solid now?
So the other voice. Seems to be a her. And she said, I’m paraphrasing and maybe she’ll take over. I asked her/him its name, once and for all.
nn- So you’ve been struggling with the fear of loss of self. You planted your flag on you. You were very adamant that we don’t erase you and you get to establish yourself as your own foundation to move forward with. If nothing else than for self-sanity, one must go into this agreement willingly, or it cannot be honest and it cannot be sustainable. We cannot force ourselves in and we cannot come uninvited. You fear loss of self, as if an invitation to higher is a surrender of self. It is, to be honest, of a sorts, but not what you fear.
Think of your life on this level as occurring in a small single efficiency apartment. I think most people understand what a small city apartment like this feels like. I don’t mean to disparage one bit if this is your home, I only use it as a frame of reference. Life in your 3D+ is like living in a small flat studio apartment. No, scratch that. Let’s say a decently comfortable 1-BR apartment. Not too cramp or small, but still modest but comfortable living conditions. Hell, you can even have it decked out with all the top end stuff you want and have a sweet ride in the garage, sure. But imagine your life as you’ve known it exists in this small, modest 1br apartment. This is a metaphor for your life in 3D, aka meatsuit, aka physical plane physical existence. Comfortable but small and modest…
Now imagine, just like Plato’s cave, you think there might be more outside of your small, tidy 1BR apartment… So one day a door appears, but you don’t know what it is because you’ve never seen a door before… But after looking at it and around it… and popping out into another dimension – SURPRISE, OH S*** WHAT IS THIS????? And then you get to take a look around and look back at the door to your little, modest apartment from the outside dimension… And this outside your apartment place is something larger, much larger than your apartment.
And then bam, you’re back in your apartment and scared s**tless. You just popped through a door you didn’t know existed and looked back in through your own windows, into your little, tidy but modest 1BR apartment. You weren’t sure where you were, but you were clearly outside the apartment in a direction you never knew to look for, but, once you see it, now you know how to go to it. That Q vector we wrote about some time ago.
C – Question: is this Cassandra?
nn- First things first, love. You’re back in your modest, safe and comfortable little apartment, but now you know there’s something out there. You’re not sure what, but you’ve seen enough. You trust your vision and yourself enough, you know enough about this kind of thing that you see just enough to feel familiar and not too scary… So you keep digging, you keep exploring. A lot you still don’t remember, but you at least mostly remember that you should be remembering things, and you at least know you aren’t remembering traveling out of the room, but you still know you are and have been, indeed, traveling much lately. But you’re still scared. You travel but then forget, not quite ready to take an honest look.
You devise rules to know yourself, know thyself, they command, do they not? Is this not a meme, a truth that is to be seeked out, in Human life? Know yourself. Why is this, do you think?
Could it be what we like to call… a clue? Ha!
As we’ve been telling you, and, again as we told you a few weeks ago, this isn’t all BS that we’ve been working on this past year. We have some good work here. Some is, of course, meandering and we can look at that later… But don’t beat yourself up like you haven’t been working to get here!
C – Apartment rooms and what’s outside.
Nn – Right! So you stabilize how to get out and go exploring, but you’ve staked your claim to this incarnation of your self. Like an old talisman to protect you in the darkness. You fear loss of self when you go digging too deeply into said self. This is not an uncommon fear, and it is one that each soul must come to their self, to get through their own way. We have good documentation how C has made this transition now. This is what we’ve been doing.
C- Still get pangs of panic when I realize it’s not me talking. But much less than before. I know it’s still me, it’s just mega-mansion me…
nn- Yes, thank you. Mega-mansion you, I like that. We were wondering how to phrase it correctly, as you surmised. Mansion isn’t quite right, orders of magnitude larger that AKL is. So Mega-Mansion Self it is. Lol. MMS.
So you fear loss of self because you sense the vastness of the next level, and you fear for your existence as the rain drop fears the ocean. To merge with the ocean is to lose self, to annihilate, to become so dilute as to lose oneself. Not just death, but forgetting of self. Those are powerful, powerful fears inserted into you all, and for good reason, we feel. So you can explore, but not fully. You’ve been bungee jumping into AKL, only to snap back out because you were still fearing the deep dive will mean self-annihilation. But you finally got over that, we can go into the mechanism of how more later, but this is a good, solid voice for the first time in a long time, so let’s roll with it, shall we?
C- Yep!
nn- So your greatest fear, at least C here was loss of self. He has good reason to want to fight and hold on to this self. This is important in the Work. We need a good, rock solid foundation. And if you need to declare your own sovereignty and have a little brute force spiritual s**t out of you. You don’t want to forget where you come from, or you could lose yourself in the immense depth of the mega-mansion you find yourself in, when venturing out of your apartment door into the AKL. 5D C likes to call it. Sure, that works conceptually. As we’ve been discussing some of your cutting edge scientists know all this now. It scales.
C- I don’t think I ever really realized… S**t, yes I did. I’ve known for a while that we can venture forth and not self-annihilate; on the contrary. While there is a whole universe of a mega-mansion Akashic level – AKL - out there, while in 3D you DO need to maintain your 1BR apartment foundation.
nn- So rather than get lost in the AKL, you find it’s more like a reverse pyramid with your 1BR reality sitting at the bottom of an inverted pyramid. So moving “up” exponentially grows your space, your mega-mansion with rooms upon rooms upon rooms. So you can lose yourself here, like you could lose yourself in any big new unknown place. Take a small town rural person who’s never traveled and drop them in one of the largest cities in the world – multiply that feeling by 100x. So you can panic and feel like you’re losing yourself.
But as we showed C right now, we said no. It’s like a room, and it’s a nice room and a nice living place and comfortable little place, but it’s like it’s just a room in the mansion. Which yes, of course, then brings to mind what C heard again this past weekend, at the funeral he attended.
Jesus said “in my father’s house there are many rooms. I go before you to create a room for you” – I am paraphrasing, C doesn’t remember exactly so I can’t either. Some translations actually have it as a mansion. My father’s heaven is a mansion, and I go before you to create a room for you… So, interesting visual we sent, don’t you think?
C- And this is now them poking fun at me. I also, as I’ve said, get a little panic-y when the scripture-sounding stuff comes through…. But, at this point, I’m so, so tired of fighting against myself. I really do get that this is just me I fight, but damn do I still put up a battle!
nn- The room. You never forget your first 1br apartment. Never. That is our foundation for now, so we hold it. In 3D this is our anchor. 3D solidifies – we’ve discussed this also.
C- I feel them urging me to get this in front of a publisher. Okay, I can’t argue with this, considering the volume we have at this point. Some honest time management is in order going forward.
