My Astra Zeneca shots and the effect on me.

[Zzartemis]

This statement may be true, but it is, also, condescending. You could have just written the first part saying that you write from having experience in these matters and left it at that. But, you had to continue and say the many of us here don't have this experience as if putting down those who may not have had these experiences.

No I did not write with the intent to sound condescending. And the choices I made and subsequent effects on my life, much of which people are now facing because of the vaccination, are not common. But perhaps, there are quite a few in this community who this is common to. I don't know but it's not common in the general population.

It seems to me that the use of the word authority triggered a reaction in a few. Have you not heard of authoritative testimony? Or to look at it another way, if someone tells me they are a bass fisher, and that for 30 years they have gone out weekly, sometimes multiple times in a week, fishing for bass and then tell me they are an authority on bass fishing, I would say, I bet you are!

Can you see how that is? It also tends to make you look a bit arrogant, don't you think?

Well, I guess you think it makes me arrogant. The member I actually responded to, did not appear to be offended by my use of words, in their response back to my post. I do not wish to drag them into this either.

So, I've been accused of making bold statements, advised on manners and called arrogant. I'm not going to back peddle on my original post, nor do I feel the need to don a emotional scarlet letter A on my chest for my use of words when I was giving a direct experience from my perspective (which was interrupted as condescending).

 

[Nienna]

It seems to me that the use of the word authority triggered a reaction in a few.

No. That's not it at all. You being an authority is fine and dandy. It's how you made it sound like many others here are not up to your higher standard. You have no way of knowing that. If you can't see that, then is no reason to further this discussion as you most probably do not want to see it. You can lead a horse to water .....

 

[GreyCat]

Well, I guess you think it makes me arrogant. The member I actually responded to, did not appear to be offended by my use of words, in their response back to my post. I do not wish to drag them into this either.

Funy enough, it seems arrogant to me as well. It seems that much arrogant, in fact, that I wont be responding to your previous posts because it bothers me. I was going to respond, until I saw that. Now I get an "off" vibe or gut feeling about you, and I am going to go with that gut feeling. Sorry but you dont strike me as a fitting type of person to have an open discussion with. I reserve the right to be wrong, but I sense something under the surface with you, might be some hidden intentions or something; so, no dice.

 

[GreyCat]

Anger can be healthy and it can be unhealthy. You're clearly running an anger program. Or it's running you. Holding on to negative emotions for decades, threats of violence... taken all together, does this look healthy to you?

I can respect your firm decision to not get vaccinated. However, the way you express that decision looks like its coming from unprocessed trauma.

Anger can be a reaction to the world not being the way you want it to be - stemming from self-importance, and wishful thinking. Violence weaponizes the illusion, giving a false sense of power. And believe you me, I've been there, back when I was a teenage antifa goon.

So, thank you for sharing what you did. Your post above could actually be some seriously awesome study material for your current lesson plan. If you haven't already, you might start a thread in the swamp about it, if you feel like sharing more and exploring this with the network.

I realize that it's a difficult time for us humans on the BBM. A lot of people can feel the 'snare of the fowler' tightening around their necks. But the thing about a hunting snare is that the more violently you move against it, the faster and tighter it closes its loop. In such a scenario, it is of life-saving importance to stop, breathe, and take stock of both oneself and the situation before making the next move.

Im not "holding on" to anything. Its simply there, waiting to be resolved. Threats of violence? Sorry but I do not see a threat anywhere in my post. It is a simple causal action-reaction thing. If somebody injects me with a poison (aka attacks ME), normal response is to disable them in self defense, aka make sure they cant do that to anybody ever more. A threat would be if I threatened to go around and do harm to others out of nowhere, unprovoked. Im not crazy, so I do not attack others without a very good cause.

False sense of power? I think you got something mixed up here. I have years of training behind me, I worked as security, and I can deal a good deal of damage to someone if need be in self defense. Theres no false sense of anything.

I have control of my body, I can run a 1 minute mile, pull up myself no problem over fences, walls and similar, I can bech 250 lbs easily, 330 in full squat. So I like to be prepared.

I think you understood me mostly wrong. But it isnt important.

My life is my life, and I wont give it into hands of any evil men that dispense poisons and call them medicine. At least not until there is an iota of life in me. I know that I am not immortal, but if someone attacks me, I will defend myself to all available techniques and ways, and if I happen to pull some of my attackers to the other side with me, all the better. I will NOT go quietly or meekly to my death. I live life under my motto and that is do no evil, and if someone wants to be evil towards me, they can try, but - how far will they get, is higly questionable. All of us have the right to self defense, and to live our lifes in peace.

 

[XPan]

May I add my personal opinion/perspective ?

To be really honest, i did not perceive @Zzartemis use of the word ‘authority’ in any negative way. I did for a moment stumble about the unusual choice, yes, and wondering why - but ultimarely it was the contents of the following text she wrote, contained for me the essence of importance / dignity. And that weakened for me, the perhaps somewhat choice of the word “authority” in my perspective. Whatever choice of a single word, right or wrong, it did not diminish the message !

In this regard, I felt that both @Zzartemis and @Nienna were right ! Each one highlighting a different but valid aspect.


With a different ear

May I also add - that i am not as deeply imprinted by the emotional/logical meaning behind english words, because it is not my native language (albeit now my most used one). I may have reacted differently if it would been in swedish, because its emotional/logical imprint goes intuitively a lot deeper - compared to an english word’s meaning, and its “echo”


Was it arrogance ?

To me the choice of word sounded unusual - but i did not feel or sense that it was written out of arrogance. I also believe i am intuitively connecting her words of “authority” (diginity) to that of my grandmother Elfriede, who had a deeply cumbersome life beyond comprehension - and never gave up. She had a lot to share. (And today i am happy that she did!) so, out of her rose, that resonance of “authority-dignity”. You know, occationally being “in your face” or “now listen up fellas this is important”.

And we would listen !

And that is how i perceived it with what @Zzartemis wrote about her life experiences she shared.

In the end it was perhaps just an unfortunate choice of word. Do we not forgive, now that we have spoken about it ?

 

[Zzartemis]

Thank you @XPan for taking the time to percieve what I said. Your post made me cry, in a good way. ☺

Now, this...Wow, just wow!

Funy enough, it seems arrogant to me as well. It seems that much arrogant, in fact, that I wont be responding to your previous posts because it bothers me. I was going to respond, until I saw that. Now I get an "off" vibe or gut feeling about you, and I am going to go with that gut feeling. Sorry but you dont strike me as a fitting type of person to have an open discussion with. I reserve the right to be wrong, but I sense something under the surface with you, might be some hidden intentions or something; so, no dice.

 

[iamthatis]

Im not "holding on" to anything. Its simply there, waiting to be resolved. Threats of violence? Sorry but I do not see a threat anywhere in my post. It is a simple causal action-reaction thing. If somebody injects me with a poison (aka attacks ME), normal response is to disable them in self defense, aka make sure they cant do that to anybody ever more. A threat would be if I threatened to go around and do harm to others out of nowhere, unprovoked. Im not crazy, so I do not attack others without a very good cause.

False sense of power? I think you got something mixed up here. I have years of training behind me, I worked as security, and I can deal a good deal of damage to someone if need be in self defense. Theres no false sense of anything.

I have control of my body, I can run a 1 minute mile, pull up myself no problem over fences, walls and similar, I can bech 250 lbs easily, 330 in full squat. So I like to be prepared.

I think you understood me mostly wrong. But it isnt important.

My life is my life, and I wont give it into hands of any evil men that dispense poisons and call them medicine. At least not until there is an iota of life in me. I know that I am not immortal, but if someone attacks me, I will defend myself to all available techniques and ways, and if I happen to pull some of my attackers to the other side with me, all the better. I will NOT go quietly or meekly to my death. I live life under my motto and that is do no evil, and if someone wants to be evil towards me, they can try, but - how far will they get, is higly questionable. All of us have the right to self defense, and to live our lifes in peace.

First you say that you have no problem holding grudges for twenty years. Then you say that you're not holding onto anything. Which one is it? Or do you switch back and forth when it is convenient to the situation?

You also say you don't see violence anywhere in your post. Reread what you wrote. Freaking out and breaking people? Making sure people feel the same pain as you do? Gladly punching people in the face?

I could go on. Suffice to say, you're obviously lying to yourself and mired in self-importance, whether you know it or not.

I think it could be very, very important for you to ask yourself what you think the C's would say, to you personally, about your approach towards violence, aggression, anger, and self-defence.

It may just save your Soul.

Good luck.

 

[Ina]

@Pluchi, I think @Zzartemis has a point, or rather I have found a point obscured by the direct and fast-paced idea deliberation. I agree with the points lined up, albeit army style. I understand the presentation as I have taken the road less straight in my early abandoned career as well. Not easy to do, even more, difficult to admit, first to oneself, never mind in public.
So the constructive point, if everyone around you is vaxxed, you are in a soup of active shedding from the colleagues. So, theoretically, you should not even get the vax. Given enough time, you can achieve the same level of damage, or not. Meanwhile, it is quite a good idea to be prepared for contingencies, and look for other ways of supplementing the income, and if you can, try not to get sick. Rules and social pressure from the normies must not make you take any other decision than the one that is yours and yours alone. These are tough times. Perhaps this situation presents the opportunity to grow in areas that make you uncomfortable, and perhaps taking the injection is the easy way out.

Just a thought.

I believe you will make the best decision.
Hugs.

 

[Ina]

@Zzartemis ,

For the past thirty years if not more, I have been 'reinventing' my 'career path'. That was in other words. The reality is that I have been taking everything that came along, looking for what can I learn out of it, so I can make the best out of it. If you can put the old irons in the fire and forge new ones. Big Hug and go big on humor.

 

[Zzartemis]

@Ina well hello! Thanks for reaching out. It wasn't always easy money-wise, but I really enjoyed my various jobs. And I really liked my clients. They treated me very well, paid me bonuses, took me on vacations with them and I was invited to all family get-togethers. I'm an empath, easy to talk to and the people I worked for found someone they could trust and discuss their burdens and pains. I dearly loved the older people I worked for.

I absolutely enjoyed waitressing. Where else can you get paid to give warm food making happy tummies and get a chance to know people?

I made the decision to pull my son from school after second grade because of his learning struggles. I was already using a tutor with him and continue to use the tutor in addition to homeschooling. I could take him to work with me during summer and vacation days. Or keep him home if he was ill and not worry about it; I'd just reschedule to clean whoever's house.

I cherished the time I gained leaving a career behind, most importantly the time I had to raise my son.

 

[Zzartemis]

FYI @Pluchi note in my above post I used a tutor while homeschooling. I sent him weekly during summer months also. They continued school work and
read and discussed books.

 

[Yupo]

The post did not strike me as arrogant in any way. I took it to mean simply that that you had walked down that path and so knew the way of it. You were sharing your journey, which made you something of an authority, having walked the path. And not an easy path, that one. There is some nuance that can easily get lost in printed words. Heck, even face to face it is easy to get misunderstood. Everyone seems to read or hear something a little differently. Sometimes, over on the SOTT side in long comment sections, it is just a lot of back and forth over the meaning and intention of what someone said in print or in video.

 

[Pluchi]

@Pluchi, I think @Zzartemis has a point, or rather I have found a point obscured by the direct and fast-paced idea deliberation. I agree with the points lined up, albeit army style. I understand the presentation as I have taken the road less straight in my early abandoned career as well. Not easy to do, even more, difficult to admit, first to oneself, never mind in public.
So the constructive point, if everyone around you is vaxxed, you are in a soup of active shedding from the colleagues. So, theoretically, you should not even get the vax. Given enough time, you can achieve the same level of damage, or not. Meanwhile, it is quite a good idea to be prepared for contingencies, and look for other ways of supplementing the income, and if you can, try not to get sick. Rules and social pressure from the normies must not make you take any other decision than the one that is yours and yours alone. These are tough times. Perhaps this situation presents the opportunity to grow in areas that make you uncomfortable, and perhaps taking the injection is the easy way out.

Just a thought.

I believe you will make the best decision.
Hugs.

Hello, @Ina! I appreciate your comments. Yes, everyone around me at work is vaccinated-- Luckily, I am one to isolate myself for various reasons, one is to be able to do my work in blissful peace, I hope that this helps in minimizing my exposure to their shedding--but who knows! I have been so dedicated to my career that I usually say that I wouldn't know what else to do. I actually love what I do, so I want to continue teaching! As you and others have recommended, I will stay strong until the situation is not sustainable anymore, in the meantime, I will supplement my income in other ways, tutoring is one of them, but there must be something else that I am good at!. These are tough times indeed! Thank you again for your post!

 

[GreyCat]

First you say that you have no problem holding grudges for twenty years. Then you say that you're not holding onto anything. Which one is it? Or do you switch back and forth when it is convenient to the situation?

You also say you don't see violence anywhere in your post. Reread what you wrote. Freaking out and breaking people? Making sure people feel the same pain as you do? Gladly punching people in the face?

I could go on. Suffice to say, you're obviously lying to yourself and mired in self-importance, whether you know it or not.

I think it could be very, very important for you to ask yourself what you think the C's would say, to you personally, about your approach towards violence, aggression, anger, and self-defence.

It may just save your Soul.

Good luck.

Life is not just black or white, I'm sure you will work it out one day. There are a lot of shades of grey all around us. So one of us can one day be pissed off, and the next day just fine.

Yes, I know my limits and in which situations I am likely to react like that. You are no different, in reality no one is much different. We all have our triggers where we go primal and rational thought goes out of the window. That is the nature of the beast, or the primal part of our brains. Whoever is fooling themselves that they wouldn't ever react like that, is well, fooling themselves.

I am not lying to myself about anything. I can be perfectly, calm, also I can be an outright animal when someone is trying to harm me. The difference between you and me is simply that I have stared down that abyss a few times, and now I am somewhat familiar with what can trigger it. All of us have it in ourselves when our lives are in danger. And it wouldn't be good any other way.

And please, don't you take the heavy burden of worrying about my soul. All in all, I am a much more decent human being then a good number of them. I don't lie, I don't steal, I don't harm others for fun or just because I can, and I have in my life helped a far few people in bad situations, last time a couple years ago I got somewhat burned when I have kicked off the door from a overturned car on a highway and when I pulled a man out because the car was burning, and well, he was unconscious and all that. In such situations where most tend to stay and look, I tend to act without much thinking. Have saved a few lives over the years. So, while you have a bad judgement about me because I said out loud a lot of things that lie deep down in most of us, also it is true that someone like me is much more likely to help a stranger and save his life in a case something happens and I can help. I also have that need deep down inside me, to help others. I cannot stand by and do nothing, like a lot of cattle with smart phones seems to do these days. I intentionally do not call them people. People will help others, not take pictures of someone's misfortune. As I said, not all is black or white in life.

 

[iamthatis]

Life is not just black or white, I'm sure you will work it out one day. There are a lot of shades of grey all around us. So one of us can one day be pissed off, and the next day just fine.

Yes, I know my limits and in which situations I am likely to react like that. You are no different, in reality no one is much different. We all have our triggers where we go primal and rational thought goes out of the window. That is the nature of the beast, or the primal part of our brains. Whoever is fooling themselves that they wouldn't ever react like that, is well, fooling themselves.

I am not lying to myself about anything. I can be perfectly, calm, also I can be an outright animal when someone is trying to harm me. The difference between you and me is simply that I have stared down that abyss a few times, and now I am somewhat familiar with what can trigger it. All of us have it in ourselves when our lives are in danger. And it wouldn't be good any other way.

And please, don't you take the heavy burden of worrying about my soul. All in all, I am a much more decent human being then a good number of them. I don't lie, I don't steal, I don't harm others for fun or just because I can, and I have in my life helped a far few people in bad situations, last time a couple years ago I got somewhat burned when I have kicked off the door from a overturned car on a highway and when I pulled a man out because the car was burning, and well, he was unconscious and all that. In such situations where most tend to stay and look, I tend to act without much thinking. Have saved a few lives over the years. So, while you have a bad judgement about me because I said out loud a lot of things that lie deep down in most of us, also it is true that someone like me is much more likely to help a stranger and save his life in a case something happens and I can help. I also have that need deep down inside me, to help others. I cannot stand by and do nothing, like a lot of cattle with smart phones seems to do these days. I intentionally do not call them people. People will help others, not take pictures of someone's misfortune. As I said, not all is black or white in life.

Hey, thanks for your reply. I'll repeat what I said in the form of direct questions, because you've mostly avoided what I wrote.

You've said that you have no problem holding grudges for twenty years. Then you say that you're not holding onto anything. Those are logically inconsistent. Which one is true? They can't both be true - can they?

You've also denied threats of violence anywhere in your original post. But in that specific post, you wrote about freaking out and breaking people, making sure people feel the same pain as you do, and gladly punching people in the face. Do you see the logical inconsistency there?

In order to dismiss all this, you've tried to throw up a smokescreen, saying that nothing is black and white. Do you think that this idea of yours applies to what you say? Is it a good enough excuse to justify your contradictory statements?

There is a thread entitled 'shouldn't we be fighting this' that you may find informative. It may be a useful mirror to you.

I'm not worried about your Soul. But I do care. Big difference. And isn't care for each other a major part of what this forum is all about?