whitecoast said:
I'm very much in the same boat as you, in terms of tending to revel in impressions. I think it's worth keeping in mind that impressions are mental and emotional as well, so the fact that you tend to savor a particular drama, fact, or other 'sensate' may not in itself indicate it comes from the moving center. ;)
I was looking at the big picture - in doing so, the significance of sensing in my inner life becomes clear. And when I say sensing, I mean sensing as distinct from both feeling and thinking.
whitecoast said:
I'm a little confused. Are you saying that a moving center predominance is your current default style in life, but in your teen years you were less spontaneous and more inhibited/cerebral, and therefore more intellectually dominant?
No - I became so throughout my teens, and since then it has to a significant extent stuck with me, though this seems to be lessening recently as emotional issues and trauma likely stored in the body are processed. Though in truth, though focusing a lot on thought, often I was not really thinking in the true sense of the word, and the inner focus was much of the time on sensation.
In earlier childhood I was, now looking back, more moving-oriented. And more present and active through my body. But as noted in this thread, man 1 can be quite inactive - the focus can be in the instinctive center more than the moving center. For me it can shift back and forth (and Gurdjieff notes that this is the way "the lower story" of the human machine works) depending on the circumstances - sometimes there comes a sudden focus on and drive towards action, at other times (currently most of the time, though this has recently been and is gradually lessening) there is predominantly the outwardly inactive focus on sensations.
The latter always stuck with me, and came to direct my decisions and mental focus - most of my inner life. It gained the upper hand and the intellect and feelings spun around following its whim.
whitecoast said:
In a book by Neal Stephenson called Anathem, one of the characters comments on how thinking very much feels like a quantum computation - where we have all sorts of digging and depthwork going on in our heads (our neuronal structures in superposition with millions of other possible arrangements), processing information, until somehow the whole wave function collapses and we come to a clear and crystallized conclusion about the problem we've focused on, like Athena emerging fully formed from the head of Zeus.
For some reason this style of thinking seems really, really general and commonplace in creative problem-solving (the only exceptions I can really think of involve kinesthetic reasoning and arithmetic). This makes me think this style isn't exclusive to having a moving center predominance, though I'm unsure how to verify this.
That's not what I mean - I don't refer to flashes of insight, to the appearance of thoughts. Though that can also occasionally occur. Rather, I mean a thoughtless, feelingless indecision that remains until the mind suddenly decides that "yeah, that (one of several options) feels best, I'll do it".
This has been an extremely efficient way of mismanaging my life for the past years, resulting in passivity, foot-dragging, misspent energy, as well as stunting creativity and problem-solving - by inhibiting the process of experimentation that follows genuine thought.
Though, on the other hand, there have also been - which has allowed some progress despite the above - some real intuitions arriving in the form of unexpected sensations that then, when inwardly examined, lead to a strong sense of direction. At best, these things go beyond what I can rationally know - and have a particular constancy.
But that is the exception - mostly it's been subjective nonsense and wasting of time and energy (and still is, far too much, though this is now actively struggled against) - it has been hard to come to see, and has only hit home in gradual steps.
whitecoast said:
Have you considered the possibility that, instead of the moving center being involved in certain types of thinking, it may just be the instinctive/moving subsection of the intellectual center that is handling certain work?
That would be another, related issue - the "thinking" I write of does involve the thinking center - since it is kept busy (comparing things presented to it) and can't properly focus on real work at the same time. Gurdjieff mentions the wrong work of centers, and I think this is simply the intellectual center being pulled and directed by, in this case, the instinctive center - instead of working independently and as it should.