Bad Boys

[BHelmet]

Sorry if my toe tapping was getting on your nerves. I was hoping you would still post your conjecture and theorizing. (And you did!)

I do agree with what you've written. I think the dynamic of our birth family, relationships with parents, siblings, extended family (if any), all has an effect on who we grow into. These are our first examples/role models. Obviously they have very positive or negative (or both) impact on how we begin to navigate our own relationships throughout our lives. I don't think that certain results are the only results though.

What I mean is that when you are a little kid, and something happens - you are just going to react - you are not going to reason it out, (before the higher level concepts are learned). It is primitive but at some point it is inevitable that "Mom doesn't love who I am, any more" "I am bad" etc, is going to get rammed into the various centers through their various pathways. It just can't be sidestepped. It is a part of the rocky path here on this planet. It is a kind of inevitable generative spark that starts the process going.

I am not offended if you want to describe heinous women.

I am thinking just from a mechanical point of view. Robot machines. No judgements.

I've known a few myself. I'm also not a man-hater, I will make the jokes but I've known some remarkable outstanding men in my life...I even made one myself, lol.

Bravo!

I do think that most people grow up following unhealthy patterns without being aware that this is what they're doing. Deflecting blame, drinking/drugs, temper/abuse, abandoning, being abandoned...I can go on but you know what I mean. A life of strife and they may never understand why or how to change things.

Good girls are attracted to bad boys for many reasons. The same with good boys and bad girls. Do they subconsciously remind you of a stern/abusive father or mother? Is this the dynamic of your parents' relationship? Does the good girl get sick of being in her happy shiny good 'box' and want to take a walk/ride on the wild/free-er side of life? Do many believe that 'love hurts' or they should do anything for love, so they take it and keep trying to love him/her better? So many options, eh? So many reasons, I think.

Yeah

You can open any can of worms you like with me, lol. Worms don't make me queasy. Just no spiders please. Please!?

Aha! you've revealed your vulnerable spot! (a sign of true strength) Mmm, you can trust me not to go there. although some of the worst demons are said to be spider like.

You wanna know what I've noticed with the long term happy marriages that I've known personally...who are still together and happy? In each case, there was no boss. They took turns according to their strengths. Communication. Commitment. But I did notice that, for the most part, the wife was more alpha, in as much as she 'seemed' to run the roost.

Yes, dear.
Plenty of good memes here. If mama ain't happy nobody is happy, etc. Smart guys learn this and joke about it. BTW, my wife of 38 years has plenty of alpha characteristics. The tricky part of the dance is knowing when to take the reigns to instill security versus avoiding getting into unnecessary head butting over dumb insignificant stuff.

But in their homes with them, it became clear that when they were together they worked like a well oiled machine.

So, as we do seem to see eye to eye...I agree that we are both correct. I don't think you can narrow it down to one or two particular causes or reasons. I think the reasons are various and how they manifest in each child/grown up is unique depending on the strength and weaknesses of the child. And on that note, I would like to thank y'all for coming to our Ted Talk!!

LOL with an audience of zero! Be sure to like and subscribe. Next episode of Jacy and Helmet will thankfully be back to taunting, trash talk, repartee and innuendo galore!