Boardlurker? Read this!!

[Eboard10]

Re: Languages confusion, brain games & Boardlurker problems relating to posting

How do you order your mind and your thoughts when writing ? What is on your mind when you are writing ? Do you write things as it comes so to speak ? Are someone else having this sort of problems ?

Hi onemen, I used to have similar issues, writing down my thoughts on a subject and failing to follow through with a reply since I couldn't put the sentences together into a coherent post. I think it's normal when you are not used to writing about certain topics, that you initially lack the confidence to post what you've written down and fear that your contribution might be perceived as noise by others who have a better mastery of the language (at least that's how I felt).

From my experience, one way to get around this negative feedback loop is to keep your posts clear and concise when writing, separating any new thoughts that cross your mind into different paragraphs. This allows you to focus on your post based on your initial thoughts and better manage any additional material that you want to add to your reply. If you are having a hard time connecting any new thoughts to your initial post, I would either skip it to begin with or try to post it separately. It's easy to get lost in one's thoughts and stray away from the initial idea, but you will find that the more you practice, the easier it will be to formulate a reply and you will feel more comfortable posting.

So, I would to ask those of the french speaking of the community about their methods to express here.

I can relate to your point of not being able to fully express your thoughts in English but also having a hard time with your native language. While Italian is my mother tongue, I stopped using it after leaving school some 10 years ago, and haven't really used it since. Nowadays, while I still think in Italian for the most part, I really struggle writing anything more than a paragraph before loosing track of what I'm writing, so I have to rely on my English to elaborate on any subject. The approach that has helped me the most in improving my English has been to practice, practice, practice. I switched from reading and thinking in Italian to English, verbally repeating my thoughts so that it would stick in my mind more easily. I would also take some time to write down my thoughts and dreams in English every day. This helped a lot in organizing my posts and the constant knowledge input from reading books and articles in English improved my vocabulary, helping express my thoughts more clearly.

My 2 cents, hope it helps.

 

[Alada]

Re: Languages confusion, brain games & Boardlurker problems relating to posting

[...] And yet I still have somes things that blocks me so to speak, and that's why I never found a rhythm to post regularly.

My first problem is my perfectionistic program that makes me write large amounts of texts due to fear of saying incomplete things and write everything on my mind before posting and therefore that makes me spend longs hours to write.

Well as you noted perfectionism is a program. If you can see what is happening maybe then you can work on finding ways to work around it, or in spite of it! This program used to run for me quite often, and can still be there at times, what helps me is to consciously think through what the program is trying to do, what thoughts it puts into me, and work with that in mind.

Left on its own to run the program instills fears and self doubt as you see in yourself, but these are generally born of the unrealistic expectations that have been put into us. What we can come to expect of ourselves then is simply not achievable and then the program is able to reinforce all of the reasons why such and so isn’t or wasn’t good enough in a negative loop. So it helps to find ways to counter that internal narrative, think the process through rationally and have those thoughts ready to deploy when the program tries to run. It doesn’t mean the associated feelings that can arise will instantly disappear, but it gives you a way to prove to yourself over time that they don’t have to rule you. That even when I do end up posting something silly (and I do), the world doesn’t end.

Perfectionism is a burden, and it is a great relief to let it go. I found that most surprising, as the thought of just putting thoughts out there at first produced anxiety, but when you see that nothing happens despite what the program is telling you, it is a great relief. The next time it is easier, and so it goes.

I wonder if it's not a brain damage problem that makes me lost for words. I have memory loss. Like, while writing something I think about what I'll say next, then the next moment I forgot the idea of ​​what I wanted to say next because another thing I want to say next has took his place.

Well I’d be surprised if we all don’t have a touch of that. Maybe if you can begin to post more, things can flow better. When we put more of our own energy into an exchange then things can free up and we have more energy and clarity then. And if energy isn’t being diverted off by programs running in the background then all the better.

It also happens to me very often to go back to correct or restate what I write and also to procrastinate in the sense that I write a general or incomplete idea while thinking about the exact detail thing I want to say and yet I told myself that I'll continue later, like, okay I'll leave it like this and then continue/complete the rest after I've finished all others things. And then It also happens that my mind goes totally blank, forgetting my point and aim and just bit of phrases rewinding and looping inside my head, not knowing how to continue :/ . In the end, I end up with a completely disjointed post with lots of ideas upside down to correct and I find myself playing puzzle games with my writings and to rewind them in my head a couples of times. In the long run it's frustrating to write, it's like I have to fight to start but after I started I'm taken over by this program.until the point I'm completely exhausted with writing and until everything is perfectly suitable for submitting.

So relating to this, I have some questions to ask.
How do you order your mind and your thoughts when writing ? What is on your mind when you are writing ? Do you write things as it comes so to speak ? Are someone else having this sort of problems ?

I think it depends on the task at hand, or what the question is. It’s also important I think to try and note what state we are in ourselves and why we wish to post.

Sometimes it is better to write whatever comes to mind in response to a question, by association we might recall something relevant that adds to the discussion for example. At other times it is well worth taking a lot more time to sit and think through what we want to say, in order to help the other person as best we can, and then go back and write it out.

With the first example, it can be okay to just let a post stand more or less as originally worded I think (partly as a way to work against the urge to run the perfectionism program). Where a question is more serious and we wish to help, it is more appropriate to go back and re read a post to check for clarity, errors and where it might be improved before we hit 'Post'.

So there’s no hard and fast rule I think, depends on the aim and what you find yourself working with at the time.

Those 2 problems added together makes me feel unsuited to express myself, adding to that more often than not, I also have the same concern peoples have talked about in this topic, that is, not feeling like having something interesting to share compared to the great minds who write here.

Well I think it’s understood that pretty much all of us have had similar thoughts along those lines. Our job isn’t to be whoever it is we might be comparing ourselves to though, just to be ourselves and add what we can. There’s nothing wrong with adding just a couple of sentences to the discussion if that’s all that comes to mind. It’s good to 'police' ourselves to a degree, but remembering that we’re largely blind to ourselves and our habit of 'trying to think about the way we think – with the way we think' it’s more often better to trust that others will show us if and when our thinking is off the mark. We can’t do it alone.

Those reasons render me frustrated and I dread the idea of posting here because I know It'll take a long time for something that should be spontaneous. I have had a couple of horrendous experiences where I have wrote blocks of texts then losing everything due to click-mistakes. Just thinking of posting here, I begun to heat and sweat to the idea. And I have a life to work on beside that, which is also not less frustrating not to mention the readings and actual work of applications. I feel like I don't have time anymore, I have before me a wall full of post-its about things I have do before moving on to something else. I feel like I'm always in a rush and not having any moment to rest because of so much things to do and think and to read,

See above, letting some things go can be a tremendous relief. It can be very fruitful too where perfectionism is concerned to explore how it works in our day-to-day lives as well, not just here on the forum. Again, a LOT of time and energy can be saved there if we can get a handle on the program.

It’s good to share!

 

[1984]

In addition to everything Alada wrote, you're posting here, now. :) The beauty of networking is the simple fact that it works!

Thanks for sharing. Lots of good points in your post that many of us very likely can observe in ourselves.

 

[loreta]

Thanks Alana for your clear explanations. And understanding.

Sometimes, for me, I have an idea of what I want to talk, for example a problem at home, and in my mind it is clear: the words, the sentences, the explanation of the problem, etc. But English is not my native language even if I read English very well and understand it very well. Then I come in front of the computer and everything that was clear in my mind is absent. Is it fear, shyness, insecurity to be judged, I don't know. Fear to show how ignorant I am. So fear to show how insecure I am, how imperfect I am. Even if I know perfectly that nobody judges here, on the contrary, every time I asked for help the response was kind, and very helpful. But language is a barrier, for people that are not English native. Or maybe we give the excuse of language as a barrier not to make the effort to write. Some things are easier to ask or express, others are very difficult to express and that's when English seems a problem. But what is clear is that the forum is always here, like a home, we can count and received advise and also the forum gives us the possibility to give advice, to give us the opportunity to express, even with very bad English, what we feel.

 

[onemen]

Thanks for the responses.

Lots of good points in your post that many of us very likely can observe in ourselves.

Perfectionism is a burden, and it is a great relief to let it go. I found that most surprising, as the thought of just putting thoughts out there at first produced anxiety, but when you see that nothing happens despite what the program is telling you, it is a great relief. The next time it is easier, and so it goes.

Yes, I always feel a bit anxious after posting, and then it's such a relief when I realize how much I've been angsting for nothing serious.

From my experience, one way to get around this negative feedback loop is to keep your posts clear and concise when writing, separating any new thoughts that cross your mind into different paragraphs. This allows you to focus on your post based on your initial thoughts and better manage any additional material that you want to add to your reply. If you are having a hard time connecting any new thoughts to your initial post, I would either skip it to begin with or try to post it separately. It's easy to get lost in one's thoughts and stray away from the initial idea, but you will find that the more you practice, the easier it will be to formulate a reply and you will feel more comfortable posting.

Thank you for your suggestions, I will force myself to do this from now one, to be more concise and getting a handle on my initial thoughts without being hijacked. On reflection , I think I'll have to learn to speak consciously in my head in French. I feel like it's some sort of voices that speak through me rather than a conscious self, because of the fact that I do not talk enough verbaly so my internal mind mirror this fact. Maybe this is the reason of my loss of train of thought too. In addition, my teacher already told me once when he was reading a text I had wrote that I was doing a Proust thing. He said Proust was a French author who wrotes very long and complicated sentence. :D

In my case, I always need French because whether in France or in my home country, I must always use this language in my daily life so i guess I will better off learning more french vocabulary to be abble to build a strong cassiopaean french voice inside me again . But I will also try to improve my English as you've said, maybe time to practice my oral english i've negleting for so long a bit more.

Well as you noted perfectionism is a program. If you can see what is happening maybe then you can work on finding ways to work around it, or in spite of it! This program used to run for me quite often, and can still be there at times, what helps me is to consciously think through what the program is trying to do, what thoughts it puts into me, and work with that in mind.

Left on its own to run the program instills fears and self doubt as you see in yourself, but these are generally born of the unrealistic expectations that have been put into us. What we can come to expect of ourselves then is simply not achievable and then the program is able to reinforce all of the reasons why such and so isn’t or wasn’t good enough in a negative loop. So it helps to find ways to counter that internal narrative, think the process through rationally and have those thoughts ready to deploy when the program tries to run. It doesn’t mean the associated feelings that can arise will instantly disappear, but it gives you a way to prove to yourself over time that they don’t have to rule you. That even when I do end up posting something silly (and I do), the world doesn’t end.

I see what you mean. Thank you for poiting your finger on this and where should I look into .. With the mess of my daily life , I feel like I am drowned into this program. I became nervous and hot-tempered because of that. Always running after time and being frustrated to not accomplish enough in one day and the next day to tell me that I have to read this, do this and then this and then I 'll be ready one day ... Okay, so I must take a break maybe and learn to listen more what happens, to keep my energy from deviations and slowly making into me an increasingly stronger voice that can counter this negative narative...
I must admit it's been a long time that I observe it in myself but I never got beyond the simple observation.

I think it depends on the task at hand, or what the question is. It’s also important I think to try and note what state we are in ourselves and why we wish to post.

Sometimes it is better to write whatever comes to mind in response to a question, by association we might recall something relevant that adds to the discussion for example. At other times it is well worth taking a lot more time to sit and think through what we want to say, in order to help the other person as best we can, and then go back and write it out.

With the first example, it can be okay to just let a post stand more or less as originally worded I think (partly as a way to work against the urge to run the perfectionism program). Where a question is more serious and we wish to help, it is more appropriate to go back and re read a post to check for clarity, errors and where it might be improved before we hit 'Post'.

So there’s no hard and fast rule I think, depends on the aim and what you find yourself working with at the time.

Well I think it’s understood that pretty much all of us have had similar thoughts along those lines. Our job isn’t to be whoever it is we might be comparing ourselves to though, just to be ourselves and add what we can. There’s nothing wrong with adding just a couple of sentences to the discussion if that’s all that comes to mind. It’s good to 'police' ourselves to a degree, but remembering that we’re largely blind to ourselves and our habit of 'trying to think about the way we think – with the way we think' it’s more often better to trust that others will show us if and when our thinking is off the mark. We can’t do it alone.

I get this. I guess I'll have to force myself into these mirroring experiences. So more reason to try to be more authentic and not caring so much about how i might appear through my post.

Thx Alada, 1984 and Eboard, I've taken notes of what you've said, this I can't help it. :D While writing this I've been heating up and sweating a bit, I'll take this as a good sign and as a evaluation marker for my next exercice of posting. Lots of thinks to ponder, i think I'll have to re-read and finish this Fear of the Abyss Book that I have put aside.

 

[onemen]

Sometimes, for me, I have an idea of what I want to talk, for example a problem at home, and in my mind it is clear: the words, the sentences, the explanation of the problem, etc. But English is not my native language even if I read English very well and understand it very well. Then I come in front of the computer and everything that was clear in my mind is absent.

I've also experienced this too. Having the images, sentences and the orientation of what I want to say in mind. Then once in front of the computer, I wasn't able to "channel" this "vision", like stumbling on words and everything goes blank.
I've also noticed something similar when for example I was reading the Secret History book and then I encountered a strong quote that made me picturing in my mind, myself, into an interaction with a relative, lecturing them over what i've just read in the book and explaining the thing with a very clear phrases, images and orientation to this relative in this fantasy.
But when I encounter a real life situation, where the issue being talked about in the book present itself, I stumbled on my words and it's not flowing as well.

I don't know, My take ont this was that, It may be a question of having a verbally strong conscious and integrated understanding of what wanted to be said versus a mechanical "vision" from a little i's voice.

 

[Nienna]

This may be slightly , but I think it's relevant for all of those whose mother tongue is not English.

First of all, to all of you whose mother tongue is not English and, yet, you post here in English, let me tell you how much I admire you. Also, some of you post in English better than some English-speaking people that I'm acquainted with; so don't feel fearful of letting the fact that English is not your first language to hold you back from posting. ;)

Second, please take it to heart that we here are quite aware of the fact that many here do not speak English as a first language and have nothing but kudos to give you when you do post.

Please keep these things in mind when thinking about posting.

And, I don't know if this will help, or not, but would it help those who struggle with posting their thoughts in English if you write it all out in your language and, then, translate it into English? I know that it takes longer, but maybe it will help you to get your point across more to your satisfaction, and it will aid in learning English better. Just a thought.

 

[casper]

This may be slightly , but I think it's relevant for all of those whose mother tongue is not English.

First of all, to all of you whose mother tongue is not English and, yet, you post here in English, let me tell you how much I admire you. Also, some of you post in English better than some English-speaking people that I'm acquainted with; so don't feel fearful of letting the fact that English is not your first language to hold you back from posting. ;)

Second, please take it to heart that we here are quite aware of the fact that many here do not speak English as a first language and have nothing but kudos to give you when you do post.

Please keep these things in mind when thinking about posting.

And, I don't know if this will help, or not, but would it help those who struggle with posting their thoughts in English if you write it all out in your language and, then, translate it into English? I know that it takes longer, but maybe it will help you to get your point across more to your satisfaction, and it will aid in learning English better. Just a thought.

Thanks Nienna for the kind words and support that you give to your posts.
I just want to give an example of how it actually sometimes funny writing in the Croatian language, and then translated into English.
Croatian word for waterspout (weather phenomenon) is the same like for leech (animal).
Therefore, it is sometimes difficult to understand what we want to say, the worst is at a very serious topic, but as Loretta said:

Some things are easier to ask or express, others are very difficult to express and that's when English seems a problem. But what is clear is that the forum is always here, like a home, we can count and received advise and also the forum gives us the possibility to give advice, to give us the opportunity to express, even with very bad English, what we feel.

:D

 

[lainey]

This may be slightly , but I think it's relevant for all of those whose mother tongue is not English.

First of all, to all of you whose mother tongue is not English and, yet, you post here in English, let me tell you how much I admire you. Also, some of you post in English better than some English-speaking people that I'm acquainted with; so don't feel fearful of letting the fact that English is not your first language to hold you back from posting. ;)

Second, please take it to heart that we here are quite aware of the fact that many here do not speak English as a first language and have nothing but kudos to give you when you do post.

Please keep these things in mind when thinking about posting.

And, I don't know if this will help, or not, but would it help those who struggle with posting their thoughts in English if you write it all out in your language and, then, translate it into English? I know that it takes longer, but maybe it will help you to get your point across more to your satisfaction, and it will aid in learning English better. Just a thought.

I couldn't agree more! I tried to imagine what it would be like if the forum and the majority of the recommended materials were originally in French or another language. It's just incredible the amount of time and effort you guys have put into being a part of the community here.
Kudos to you all

 

[loreta]

Thank you Nienna and Lainey.

Casper how funny sometimes a situation can be. You translate for example "the weather is very cold" and the real translation can be "the animal is very cold." ;D

I have to say that I like English. I admire people here who express so well in English, like really good writers, and in this forum the majority of English speakers express very well their ideas in a excellent English.

Nienna I think you proposed a good exercise to do, write in our native language and then translate the text. Thanks for the advice.

 

[3DStudent]

Re: Languages confusion, brain games & Boardlurker problems relating to posting

I think you made a first step and explained yourself well onemen. And your English is good, so no worries. If you have issues with losing your text, try putting it into a word processor and saving it often first. I do that for longer posts. You can also periodically do a select all and copy (ctrl-a ctrl-c) on your post. Although that doesn't work in Windows without an app if you're copying other things like forum quotes. I've had the post it note issue, and usually they just lose their significance and I can just toss or delete them after a while. Try to break down a post it note into more step by step actions. I've talked about the post it problem here and about "tabitis" here, fwiw.

I wonder if it's not a brain damage problem that makes me lost for words. I have memory loss. Like, while writing something I think about what I'll say next, then the next moment I forgot the idea of ​​what I wanted to say next because another thing I want to say next has took his place.

I don't think it's memory loss, as I have the same problem. I think you have to accept that your post will never be as good as you imagine it in your mind. My posts start out as a few phrases in notepad, which I expand upon later. And after editing and proofreading, I just accept that I included the most important points. You can always go back and add something that you forgot. Maybe carrying a little pocket notebook would help, or using the voice recording app on your phone if you have one. This way you can organize all of those little thoughts and epiphanies that come throughout the day.

So relating to this, I have some questions to ask.
How do you order your mind and your thoughts when writing ? What is on your mind when you are writing ? Do you write things as it comes so to speak ? Are someone else having this sort of problems ?

It's an art to organizing your thoughts into a coherent post. I think you have to just dive in with faith and accept that the post will be what it will be. When your mind is racing with so many thoughts and insights that you feel you'll forget soon, try just writing down key words and phrases that will trigger the memory later. Then just add in the details and make it a readable narrative. It's like your mind is a big information center and you have to filter it down into writing. Again we come back to faith, just go with it and do your best to include the most important things.

So, I would to ask those of the french speaking of the community about their methods to express here.

Again, you've made a clear and coherent post in English which I can really relate to. It's all information in the end, and what counts is that we reach a mutual understanding. There are probably a few different roads (or word choices) that get us to the same place.

I think those whose mother language isn't English have an additional challenge, but it can also be more of an opportunity. You get to share your thoughts about important things on the forum, while at the same time learning how to express yourself in English too. I took Spanish for 5 years in school. And while I cannot express complex things, it's fun to sometimes listen shortly to some things or read a bit of a Spanish SOTT article and see how much I understand. So kudos to all of you multilinguals!

onemen, you've made a good first effort and I think you will be able to get better with practice. Good luck! :)

 

[onemen]

First of all, to all of you whose mother tongue is not English and, yet, you post here in English, let me tell you how much I admire you. Also, some of you post in English better than some English-speaking people that I'm acquainted with; so don't feel fearful of letting the fact that English is not your first language to hold you back from posting. ;)

Second, please take it to heart that we here are quite aware of the fact that many here do not speak English as a first language and have nothing but kudos to give you when you do post.

Thanks you, I didn't see it that way, I'll keep that in mind when I happen to feel the limiting program. I too have much respect and sympathy for people who try to speak my other mother language (malagasy). :)

And, I don't know if this will help, or not, but would it help those who struggle with posting their thoughts in English if you write it all out in your language and, then, translate it into English? I know that it takes longer, but maybe it will help you to get your point across more to your satisfaction, and it will aid in learning English better. Just a thought.

Yes, I've been doing just that, writing first in french then pasting one paraphraph at a time in google translate then working from that. I noticed it's been a faster method than directly writing and translating as it comes and strugling with the translation, especially if I have much things to say. But at the same time, I noticed that the advantage of writing directly is that it force yourself to be creative and use your english learnings while just pasting and using translation may render like a weird english i think but it does help to get the point accross faster. It also help in learning vocabulary but unless you write and keep vocabulary notes somewhere it's easy to forgot when you don't practice regularly.

I think you made a first step and explained yourself well onemen. And your English is good, so no worries. If you have issues with losing your text, try putting it into a word processor and saving it often first. I do that for longer posts. You can also periodically do a select all and copy (ctrl-a ctrl-c) on your post. Although that doesn't work in Windows without an app if you're copying other things like forum quotes. I've had the post it note issue, and usually they just lose their significance and I can just toss or delete them after a while. Try to break down a post it note into more step by step actions. I've talked about the post it problem here and about "tabitis" here, fwiw.

3D Student, I always remember this horrible afternoon where I've been losing my text, not one time but two times straight, like writing long blocks then miscllicking somewhere and losing it all, i felt frustrated but still resume to wrote again and then felt the text was better but then again I lost it again a second time and I felt so mad at myself and despair and frustration to have to recall everything and the way I had it in mind but still managed to write again, even if in the end it didn't felt as good as what I imagine to begin with.
So I've been learning this leason now, So i guess it may be an important suggestion to everybody, each time I plan to write a long post, after a couple of blocks, I always Select all (Ctrl-A), Copy (Ctrl-C), Paste (Ctrl-V) inside a notepad fil, just in case and regularly Save (Ctrl-S). (In Windows)

For the posts-it issue, I have begun to post -it just to keep track and write my idea and project down, to have a remainder of my priority, and not really as a daily "things to do", as my head is already full of conflicting things to do list. For example my post-it consist of books or topics to read remainders, software or skills to practice relating to my studies and creative ideas and things for long terms plans, but yes after a while I does toss some of them as unrelevant anymore.

I think you have to accept that your post will never be as good as you imagine it in your mind.

Funny thing I noticed is that, I am always pressured and angsting about my post not really as I had in my mind but curiously after submitting and re-reading It feel more or less proud and content. I just don't know if, for example I was less angsting and less caring about it, Would the post render as good as well ? I'll look at that.

Maybe carrying a little pocket notebook would help, or using the voice recording app on your phone if you have one. This way you can organize all of those little thoughts and epiphanies that come throughout the day.

Thank for the suggestion on the voice recording. I have a portable voice recording device i've carried since years but alwas forgot about it. I used to write my thoughs on a notepad on my smartphone but I always forgot to refer back to it once home. I think I will try it as it may be a better way to recall epiphanies of days as I feel voice recordinsg may retain more impressions and atmospheres.

It's an art to organizing your thoughts into a coherent post. I think you have to just dive in with faith and accept that the post will be what it will be. When your mind is racing with so many thoughts and insights that you feel you'll forget soon, try just writing down key words and phrases that will trigger the memory later. Then just add in the details and make it a readable narrative.

Yes, I've come to the same conclusion about long post. I will first layout ideas and bits and pieces of key sentences and then proceed from that into a readable narrative. And you are perfectly right about Faith !!! The perfectionnistic program make me Anticipate to avoid suffering but as we now, good things even things not always agreable at first) come with Non-Anticipation and Pure faith in the process and Anticipation is a sign of a lack of Faith, ;D

 

[genero81]

Even though I don't post a lot, when I do, I just find a starting point; an opening sentence. Then I sort of just type and organize my thoughts as I go. When I'm done I re-read it and preview it, make corrections and adjustments, and then post it. My biggest issue is having a time slot that matches up with having something on my mind I want to post about. Sometimes there is something I would like to say but don't have adequate time to type it out since my typing skills are lacking. Or maybe I'm still kind of lazy. :( Although, I'm certain I'm much better than I used to be. It definitely takes more effort to contribute to a discussion than to just read through threads. But yeah, time constraints are definitely part if it.

I should have developed better typing skills.

 

[Alada]

Well as you noted perfectionism is a program. If you can see what is happening maybe then you can work on finding ways to work around it, or in spite of it! This program used to run for me quite often, and can still be there at times, what helps me is to consciously think through what the program is trying to do, what thoughts it puts into me, and work with that in mind.

Left on its own to run the program instills fears and self doubt as you see in yourself, but these are generally born of the unrealistic expectations that have been put into us. What we can come to expect of ourselves then is simply not achievable and then the program is able to reinforce all of the reasons why such and so isn’t or wasn’t good enough in a negative loop. So it helps to find ways to counter that internal narrative, think the process through rationally and have those thoughts ready to deploy when the program tries to run. It doesn’t mean the associated feelings that can arise will instantly disappear, but it gives you a way to prove to yourself over time that they don’t have to rule you. That even when I do end up posting something silly (and I do), the world doesn’t end.

I see what you mean. Thank you for poiting your finger on this and where should I look into .. With the mess of my daily life , I feel like I am drowned into this program. I became nervous and hot-tempered because of that. Always running after time and being frustrated to not accomplish enough in one day and the next day to tell me that I have to read this, do this and then this and then I 'll be ready one day ... Okay, so I must take a break maybe and learn to listen more what happens, to keep my energy from deviations and slowly making into me an increasingly stronger voice that can counter this negative narative...

It seems to be that working on ourselves we can begin to see way more of our errors than we’re able to actually reconcile at any one time. Or at least I sometimes have that feeling .

The feeling though which can also come along with the thought of fixing this or that first so that 'then I’ll be ready', can stop us from actually doing even the things we can do at that moment. It can turn into the curse of "tomorrow" which of course, never comes. I often found that it would stop me from posting, or at least would keep me waiting to see what others might have to say first, see if my thoughts and impressions were 'good enough' before taking the plunge. All in order that I might feel more comfortable before hitting the 'Post' button, ...and then by that time the discussion has moved on, or someone else said it better, or the though now seems silly or whatever. Then rinse and repeat all over again.

As you noted above, in such circumstances we need a consciously reasoned out narrative that can be stronger than that feeling. Get some reigns on the emotional horses, and then remember our aim.

 

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As a serial procrastinator, I really appreciate this thread. The notion that by not communicating or participating, one is potentially robbing another of an opportunity to learn and grow is one that I've been thinking about a lot lately. I've really learnt a lot thanks to others participation, so I hope that I can make a positive contribution as well. Thanks!