Éiriú-Eolas - Breathing Program

[kinyash]

Hi Jeremy,

After doing my daily PB and POTS (without the Baha portion) I developed pain in the joints connecting the right leg with the hip. It is not very painful but more uncomfortable. This is a pain I remember from when I was aged around twelve. At that age I went to a period of several weeks where I had the same kind of pain, of which the doctor first thought it had to do something with a infected appendicitis, but later concluded (due to my age) that it had to do with (too) fast growing at the onset of puberty. Quiet suddenly the pain disappeared and never came back, until now. As I mentioned in other threads I started to reconnect with my inner child the last week and I thought the return of this pain might have to do something with this reconnecting. Am I suppose to remember something? the age of twelve was a difficult period (I felt shameful). I was in the first grade of junior highschool and had particular difficulties in learning Latin. I also started loosing eyesight to the point where I needed glasses. It was the first time I recollect failing in something (at least there was objective proof that I did not pass the tests) and I always explained loosing eyesight as not wanting to see something. Don't know if that is correct though. This afternoon (at work) the pain came back and is there now as I write. Strangely the pain came back when during lunch break I decided to write about it on the forum. What should I read in all this? I am lost here in how to go about it, so any advice would be appreciated.

Oxajil and Nienna have given some great advice. I just wanted to add that its interesting you got the pains without doing the Beatha (BaHa) portion. During Beatha the different breathing rates mimic the way you breathed during times of crisis and emotional trauma. This results in you re-experiencing the same crisis but under controlled conditions which allows you to work through the event. I suggest that you continue to do the daily practice and also try and do two complete sessions (i.e. Bioenergetic, Beatha and POTS) during the week. Keep up your practice and the pain will go, you may also get some insights that will leave you amazed!

Kinyash

 

[Jeremy F Kreuz]

from Oaxjil Nienna Eluch

Just to be sure, and maybe you already did, I think you should also look into your diet, see if there might be anything there connected to it as well.

looking at your diet is a good idea. Are you on the improved UltraSimple Diet?

No I am not on the diet for the moment. I have the books on diet on the reading table but have not yet started to read them. The last weeks the learning has been so fast and furious that I am hesitant to start too many things at once. I also want to be sure the situation in my family is stable enough so that my changing my diet is not going to menace the improvements that have been made. I had a few days ago the strategic opportunity to disclose my passive aggressiveness to my wife and this went very well. I have to admit though that changing the diet and the discipline that goes with it, is a bit frightening for the moment. There is an argument in my mind that I am battling with, it goes like: if you would not be with your wife, you could easily go onto the diet. She is the one that is obstructing you. I know that is the negative interject speaking, and I have objective facts that when I am alone abroad my diet is worse then at home. It seems to be a question of finding the right balance between going ahead and not jumping too far at once.

(And if you want, you could always do some contemplating on your childhood and see if you could learn anything from that.)

I would look at these past traumas and soothe that inner child. Let him know that he does not have to be 100% perfect in any respect and that he is perfect in your eyes and the Universe's. Give him the love and acceptance that he didn't get back then. And, then, let these traumas go to the Universe to be done with as will be done.

After the daily breathing I had a dream where at some point I (as a young boy) was running with a another schoolkid in the streets and we approached a car that seemed to block the way (there was yelling and the owner of the car was saying that everybody had to wait until he was finished doing what he had to do). We passed it but something else that was behind us seem to damage it trying to get trough (another car?). For some reason we felt we were responsible for this damage and as we saw the owner getting after us, we started to run. The other schoolkid could run faster and I got exhausted and the owner caught up with me. Then I woke up.

I contemplated about this dream (keeping in mind what is quoted above) and in flash I realised this schoolkid was my neighbour who went to the same school and for years we walked together home. I remembered that one day as we walked home we passed a murderscene where the police was cleaning up the blood by washing it away in the gutter of the street. The bodies had already been removed (it was a man who killed his ex girlfriend after she had refused to come back to him and then killed himself, in broad daylight in the middle of a street). A bit further my mother was waiting to pick me up (at that age we walked to the school where my sister went to school where my mother picked us all up and took us home - I must have been 7 - 8 years old). Of course we talked about the murder to my mother and she answered: I hoped it would all have been clean before you passed it. Lying in bed I wondered why she did not wait for us on the other side of the street and picked us up there, if she really wanted to avoid us seeing the scene. I felt angry but could not remember more of that day. I continued to recall the road to home I walked every day and felt a lot of anxiety. there were several stretches were I remembered I liked not to pass, like the dark river where I feared to drown. In the meantime the pain in the joint between right leg and joint had returned, but it started to spread, to my knee, my feet, my right wrist. Then the pain moved to the lower middle back and shifted to the left joint of leg and hip. Then back to the right leg. My stomach area was raging with spasms. I felt it had something to do with the nerves. I remembered that my mother used to say a lot: don't work on my nerves (bad translation). As I soothed the inner child and told him it was OK, I realised the strong hero program in me. I had to be stronger then I was, I had to be less fearfull then I was and this is all stacked up inside.

from Kinyash

I suggest that you continue to do the daily practice and also try and do two complete sessions (i.e. Bioenergetic, Beatha and POTS) during the week. Keep up your practice and the pain will go, you may also get some insights that will leave you amazed!

That is is the rhythm that I keep up. And yes how amazing it is!

 

[Gawan]

Hello,

my yesterdays EE session was very intense and also a complete one from the beginning to the end, because I felt a little bit weak and tired in the last two weeks, so that I hadn't the strength for the full program.

It has been intense, because I almost cried the entire session, it started with the three stage breathing and ended in the POTS part. Many memories came up from the last two months, where I met different people and traveled a little bit around. It was on the one hand sad and on the other hand also releasing and fulfilling somehow.

During the POTS I needed some time to relax again. I did zone out a lot, it has been seconds and then I came back, nonetheless I have only fragments of memories of it, that it has been kind of a deep feeling during the zoning. And in the end I fell asleep for about half an hour, but I lost the feeling of time so that I can't remember it entirely, I only woke up later.

 

[Human]

Hi!
During my last whole EE session I played with different "mental" states, mostly with determination like suggested by Oxajil.
The overall feeling was different - in a positive sense, mind remained more focused and observation of sensations was done more easily.
Thanks Oxajil for your suggestion!
Concerning things during EE, nothing very special happened.
I felt very fast heart-beating during Warrior Breath which was calmed down by very deep breathing before Beatha, some "micro" zoning outs during Beatha and a lot of external disturbance during whole session (neighbours above made quite a lot of noise, fighting each other :( and there was my phone ringing right before POTS part). Thanks to some parts in Myth of Sanity I tried (and succeeded ) to ignore all of that.

All in all, very interesting thing this playing with states during EE. Will continue with it and let y'all know what comes out of it.

 

[Oxajil]

Hi Jeremy,

No I am not on the diet for the moment. I have the books on diet on the reading table but have not yet started to read them. The last weeks the learning has been so fast and furious that I am hesitant to start too many things at once. I also want to be sure the situation in my family is stable enough so that my changing my diet is not going to menace the improvements that have been made. I had a few days ago the strategic opportunity to disclose my passive aggressiveness to my wife and this went very well. I have to admit though that changing the diet and the discipline that goes with it, is a bit frightening for the moment. There is an argument in my mind that I am battling with, it goes like: if you would not be with your wife, you could easily go onto the diet. She is the one that is obstructing you. I know that is the negative interject speaking, and I have objective facts that when I am alone abroad my diet is worse then at home. It seems to be a question of finding the right balance between going ahead and not jumping too far at once.

I see, well maybe you can open a thread about it sometime and talk about the fears you have of changing to the new diet and maybe ask for suggestions on how you could make the changes in an external considerate way.
I think with the right approach you could make the changes, without much struggle coming from outside or inside.
Changing your diet to a more healthy one is quite important, and might make the road to Be, easier. Taking care of yourself and paying attention to yourself, includes also your body.

After the daily breathing I had a dream where at some point I (as a young boy) was running with a another schoolkid in the streets and we approached a car that seemed to block the way (there was yelling and the owner of the car was saying that everybody had to wait until he was finished doing what he had to do). We passed it but something else that was behind us seem to damage it trying to get trough (another car?). For some reason we felt we were responsible for this damage and as we saw the owner getting after us, we started to run. The other schoolkid could run faster and I got exhausted and the owner caught up with me. Then I woke up.

That sounds like a dark man dream:

At that point, I could have plunged back into denial, into the old belief system, for the sake of peace and keeping everything stable, but I had a dream that clearly told me that I was in mortal danger if I did not take immediate action. It was the standard "Dark Man Dream" as described by Clarissa Pinkola Estes, a Jungian psychologist, who uses ancient tales as maps to chart our unconscious knowing in her book Women Who Run With The Wolves.

"The natural predator of the psyche is not only found in fairy tales but also in dreams. There is a universal initiatory dream, one so common that it is remarkable if a person has reached age 25 without having had such a dream. The dream usually causes the person to jolt awake, striving and anxious. The dream usually involves being in a house with danger outside or darkness outside. The dreamer is frightened and frantically tries to obtain assistance. Suddenly, they realize the danger is virtually on top of them, or right with them, or cannot be overcome or avoided, or that they have lost. The dreamer awakens instantly, breathing hard, heart pounding.

"There is a strong physical aspect to having a dream of the predator. The dream is often accompanied by sweats, struggles, hoarse breathing, heart pounding, and sometimes crying and moans of fear. We could say the dream-maker has dispensed with subtle messages to the dreamer and now sends images which shake the neurological and autonomic nervous system of the dreamer, thereby communicating the urgency of the matter.

"The antagonists of the 'dark dream' are, in people's own words, 'terrorists, rapists, thugs, concentration camp Nazis, marauders, murderers, criminals, creeps, bad men, thieves.' There are several levels to the interpretation of the dream..."

"Often such a dream is a reliable indicator that a person's consciousness is just beginning to gain awareness of the innate psychic predator...."

"The dream is a harbinger; the dreamer has just discovered or is about to discover and begin liberating a forgotten and captive function of the psyche.

"The dark man dream tells a person what predicament they are facing. The dream tells about a cruel attitude toward the dreamer. Like Bluebeard's wife, the dreamer can consciously gain hold of the 'key' question about this matter and answer it honestly, and can then be set free. ...

"The dark man appears in dreams when an initiation - a psychic change from one level of knowing and behavior to another more energetic level of knowledge and action is imminent. The initiation creates an archway which one prepares to pass through to a new manner of knowing and being....

"Dreams are 'portales,' entrances, preparations, and practices for the next step in consciousness.

"Dark man dreams are wake-up calls. They say: Pay attention! Something has gone radically amiss in the outer world. ....The threat of the 'dark man dreams' serves as a warning to all of us -- if you don't pay attention, something will be stolen from you! The dreamer needs to be initiated so that whatever has been robbing her can be recoginzed, apprehended, and dealt with.

"In the Bluebeard story we see how a woman who falls under the spell of the predator rouses herself and escapes him, wiser for the experience. The story is about transformation through knowledge, insight, voice, decisive action. We must unlock the secrets and use our abilities to be able to stand what we see. And then, we must use our voice and our wits to do what needs to be done about what we see. When instincts are strong, we intuitively recognize the innate predator by scent, sight, and hearing... we anticipate its presence, hear it approaching, and take steps to turn it away. In the instinct-injured (i.e. nuts and bolts person) the predator is upon them before they register its presence. We have been taught to be nice, to behave, to be blind, and to be misused. [We have been hypnotized to give up our flesh and skins.]

"The young and the injured are uninitiated. Neither knows much about the dark predator and are, therefore, credulous. But, fortunately, when the predator is on the move, it leaves behind unmistakable tracks in dreams. These tracks eventually lead to its discovery, capture and containment.

"Wild Ways teaches people when not to act 'nice' about protecting their souls. The instinctive nature knows that being 'sweet' in these instances only makes the predator smile. When the soul is being threatened, it is not only acceptable to draw the line and mean it, it is required."

Do you think it could be a dark man dream?

I contemplated about this dream (keeping in mind what is quoted above) and in flash I realised this schoolkid was my neighbour who went to the same school and for years we walked together home. I remembered that one day as we walked home we passed a murderscene where the police was cleaning up the blood by washing it away in the gutter of the street. The bodies had already been removed (it was a man who killed his ex girlfriend after she had refused to come back to him and then killed himself, in broad daylight in the middle of a street). A bit further my mother was waiting to pick me up (at that age we walked to the school where my sister went to school where my mother picked us all up and took us home - I must have been 7 - 8 years old). Of course we talked about the murder to my mother and she answered: I hoped it would all have been clean before you passed it. Lying in bed I wondered why she did not wait for us on the other side of the street and picked us up there, if she really wanted to avoid us seeing the scene. I felt angry but could not remember more of that day. I continued to recall the road to home I walked every day and felt a lot of anxiety. there were several stretches were I remembered I liked not to pass, like the dark river where I feared to drown. In the meantime the pain in the joint between right leg and joint had returned, but it started to spread, to my knee, my feet, my right wrist. Then the pain moved to the lower middle back and shifted to the left joint of leg and hip. Then back to the right leg. My stomach area was raging with spasms. I felt it had something to do with the nerves. I remembered that my mother used to say a lot: don't work on my nerves (bad translation). As I soothed the inner child and told him it was OK, I realised the strong hero program in me. I had to be stronger then I was, I had to be less fearfull then I was and this is all stacked up inside.

I think telling the inner child that it's just OK, will do something, but not much. It is understanding (that comes from knowledge), what imo important is, which should go together with the soothing. As a child you might've not been able to understand things, the way you can now. If your mother didn't pick you up the way she could, now you can think of reasons why she didn't. If you think about how much programs are present in us, how hurt we are inside and how we've been learning the wrong things, from being raised in probably narcissistic families, and if you think about the impact of traumatic experiences we all have had and have, or pain we still haven't dealt with coming from past lives (if possible) and much more, plus the thought that we are machines not being able to control anything (in a certain sense), so having all this in mind you could think of reasons why you mom did what she did, especially with the daily observations you have from being with her for years.
So you think about you as a child at that moment, you think about your mother at that moment, and you think about the person you are now, the situation and you look at these in all ways possible with the knowledge you have. And you do it until you've found that peace and understanding of the situation, and the emotions that were present. (Fwiw)

I don't understand why you had to be less fearful/stronger than you were? Do you mean stronger and less fearful than when you were a child?

--

Legolas, that sounds like quite a cleansing! And Sasha, I'm glad you're enjoying :)

 

[Guardian]

You might find this site interesting, not sure if it'll help: _http://www.paganspath.com/healing/ailments.htm
You can read there:

Hiya Oxajil... I just noticed the link to paganspath.com. Do you happen to know Vickie Carey aka "Lady SpringWolf" the owner/operator of paganpath.com?"

 

[Oxajil]

You might find this site interesting, not sure if it'll help: _http://www.paganspath.com/healing/ailments.htm
You can read there:

Hiya Oxajil... I just noticed the link to paganspath.com. Do you happen to know Vickie Carey aka "Lady SpringWolf" the owner/operator of paganpath.com?"

Ah no I don't. But I thought the symbology was taken from Louise Hay.

 

[Guardian]

Ah no I don't. But I thought the symbology was taken from Louise Hay.

It might have been? I was just curious since I know Vickie :)

 

[Oxajil]

Ah no I don't. But I thought the symbology was taken from Louise Hay.

It might have been? I was just curious since I know Vickie :)

Oh, cool! I just check that page every now and then, since I don't have the book yet.

 

[Stranger]

I did the program the last 3 month nearly daily.

After doing it for a few days I noticed a growing self-confidence. I think my ability, to handle traumatizing and disturbing things increased. Unfortunately, this higher self-confidence only appeared for a few hours after the meditation.

After a few weeks I realized an REALLY unbelievable big hunger. I was able to eat nearly through the whole day, without loosing my appetite. It could also correlate with my change in diet - I eliminated all Gluten and Dairy from my diet. After 3 Month these effect still didn't vanish.

After the breathing part I am always very relaxed.

After 2 month I had a vivid and shocking dream. I saw the "Death" (this famous picture, the black caped guy with the scythe). There was a little child with a blue sword, surrounded by many of these black caped entities. Suddenly the child took his sword and killed all the evil little "deaths". Then there were one other big "death" entity, on the right and left two other, smaller ones, flying trough the air without making a sound (it was a scary atmosphere) and I heard the words "The death will find you." Interestingly it was my first dream ever, that wasn't related to daily concerns and problems. Shocked my a little bit and after I heard these word I woke up, totally frightened. I even didn't dare to get up though I had to pee :D Maybe I am the little child, fighting against these dark forces?

I also went through many unsolved memories of my childhood, but I can't say if it is related to EE, because at the same time I got massages to solve my tension and making the memories/problems, which are always connected with bodytensions, consciously.

Now, after 3 month, I feel only a quite interesting change, but I am not sure if it is related either: I am much more empathic. For example, it's getting harder and harder for me, to watch cruel movies. When I see scenes of violence I am frightened to my heart.

Or, another thing, I walked through a big city, and then I saw an old man sitting by the street playing on a flute for getting money. No one noticed him but I felt so sad for the man, it is so cruel that in our society a man have to sit in the coldness playing (more or less good) on a flute, to survive. After seeing me, he seemed to be very happy, laughed and tried to play. But he made a few mistakes and seemed to be embarrassed. But tears came to me and rolled down my cheeks. There was this man, trying to play and despite his mistakes the song on the flute was flushed with sadness and grace. He wasn't aware of this, but it seemed that I could feel this unconscious, deeper feeling of him. I think everyone else only would see a drunk man playing a poor song, but I was aware of these other layer.

Today I watched the movie "The Road", and nearly from the beginning to the end I was crying. Not only a little bit, it was almost an Odyssey for me. I never noticed such emotional reactions, watching movies. And, as I mentioned earlier, some cruel scenes were too painful for me. A few month ago I even could see horror movies but now it seems impossible for me to watch such movies voluntary.

My whole life I'm an emotional and deep person. But since doing EE it seems to me, that this meditation removes the layers which are separating me from myself, especially my feelings.

I don't notice any big changes concerning EE, yet. I don't know if the spoken meditation (prayer of the soul) works properly for me, because it is in English. So maybe my unconscious mind isn't able to comprehend the message because I always have to translate what I hear.

This is everything so far, I think. If more comes in my head, I will report it.

 

[Aiming]

Hello Stranger,

that sounds like a lot of positive development!

I can especially relate to you not being able to watch any horror or other cruel movies anymore; it's just become impossible to stand, because it seems that those things affect me deeper than before, combined with - in my own case- not understanding how someone could possibly like watching those things.

I don't notice any big changes concerning EE, yet. I don't know if the spoken meditation (prayer of the soul) works properly for me, because it is in English. So maybe my unconscious mind isn't able to comprehend the message because I always have to translate what I hear.

There is a German translation of the Prayer, you can find it here. (Scroll down a bit, it's post number 130 from Legolas).

I have for a long time been using the English Prayer, too, but have recently found that doing it in my native language seems to reach even deeper. Whether this is objective, I cannot say. In any case, I'm using both versions now, depending on how I feel.


Edited to give the direct link to the Prayer.

 

[Approaching Infinity]

Last night was interesting. I decided to listen to some music before the POTS, while doing my pipe-breathing. I chose one of the first CDs I ever bought, which I hadn't listened to in a while. While listening, all kinds of memories and feelings came back to me from my adolescence. As I got more relaxed, my body got probably the most relaxed it's ever been. I felt like I was floating in my body. Then this pulsing feeling started, as if I were a balloon bobbing a couple inches up and down at a regular tempo. I thought maybe it was my heartbeat, and I decided to try to "step out of it" and just observe it from a distance. As soon as I did so, the tempo doubled! On the one hand I was completely relaxed, but my mind was fully present and aware, and I felt energized as well. This was interesting because I've had a blocked tear duct for a couple days, which has been inflaming my head and causing some strong discomfort. But lying there, I couldn't have been more comfortable or pain free!

 

[pete02]

Last night was interesting. I decided to listen to some music before the POTS, while doing my pipe-breathing. I chose one of the first CDs I ever bought, which I hadn't listened to in a while. While listening, all kinds of memories and feelings came back to me from my adolescence. [ ... ]

That's really interesting AI. Ever since I've started doing the EE my taste in music seems to be going backwards (liking the music I grew up on even more now) and I've never thought of it accounting for all the memories that keep popping into my mind from my past but maybe that's exactly what it is. Maybe my mind is trying to remember certain things from my past hence my new found desire for the music I used to listen to? I'm gonna dig up some oldies and check that out myself. I'll be sure to let you know if I have any significant results.

Thanks for idea!

 

[Divide by Zero]

SNIP

Today I watched the movie "The Road", and nearly from the beginning to the end I was crying. Not only a little bit, it was almost an Odyssey for me. I never noticed such emotional reactions, watching movies. And, as I mentioned earlier, some cruel scenes were too painful for me. A few month ago I even could see horror movies but now it seems impossible for me to watch such movies voluntary.

My whole life I'm an emotional and deep person. But since doing EE it seems to me, that this meditation removes the layers which are separating me from myself, especially my feelings.

I don't notice any big changes concerning EE, yet. I don't know if the spoken meditation (prayer of the soul) works properly for me, because it is in English. So maybe my unconscious mind isn't able to comprehend the message because I always have to translate what I hear.

This is everything so far, I think. If more comes in my head, I will report it.

Howdy Stranger, (lol, just had to say howdy with that name!)

I've also always been emotional and EE seemed to help me cry easier too. If you liked crying to The Road, check out Grave of the Fireflies!

When I was young I remember crying during movies or crying when angry at a 'friend' notorious for lying to me. I felt so freaking embarrassed and learned how to hold it back. I suppose the EE helps us let go of that "don't cry" program, so common to men because "boys don't cry".

Maybe you can translate the prayer of the soul into your native language and memorize it. Then, when you hear the prayer, you can repeat it in your mind, in your language, after you hear Laura say it. I repeat it in english after she says it, and it seems to help me fall into a deeper state of meditation, even though its already spoken in my native language.

 

[Thebull]

Hi,

I have been practising the breathing techniques for around 4 weeks now. Also often before sleeping listening to the meditation prayer for the soul. I have at times felt rejuvenated and energized but recently my energy has been low. . Over the last week particularly I have been sweating a lot and feeling very tired. Can the breathing and mediation have the effect of physical changes on my body. I know in the past I have been affected by the clock change in the UK. We recently moved the clocks back a hour. I was interested to know if you think the breathing and mediation can cause the body to release toxins?

One more question I downloaded the meditation CD onto Itunes on my computer. It took an eternity to download and the quality of the playback is poor. For instance the meditation CD played on a CD player on Track 4 lasts for about 25 minutes the last 10 been music only. I find this very beneficial when the prayer finishes to continue in the meditative state. When playing on my Ipod the recording stops about 10 seconds after Laura finishes the prayer. Has anyone else had problems downloading the CD?

Thanks for your time and I realise there are links that are useful to read on the forum. I have read some and will continue to do so.

Thank you