How are you feeling?

[Puma]

Maybe the problem for you could be your nieces watching Tiktok on your phone?

No, each of them has their own cell phone. I remember something else that happened a week before, it was May 21. Another one of my brothers who lived with me suddenly decided to leave the house, from one day to the next he told me that he had already received a house and that he was leaving.

There was no discussion. I felt sad that my 2 year old niece would be leaving the house, I was always playing with her like any uncle. It also caused me some stress because we split the household expenses, including Internet service.

Now that I tell you this I wonder if there was an energy shift. Like the experience Joe shared with us in the last session, about the feelings of oppression he told us he feels when he temporarily leaves home and returns.
​

(Joe) When me and Andromeda and also others have left here for a while, when we come back, we notice that when we're away we feel different. And when we come back we feel like… kind of like a... how do you describe it?

(Andromeda) Heavy.

(Joe) Like a kind of heaviness.

(Chu) Like there's more gravity.

(Joe) We feel more oppressed. [laughter]

(L) So, you feel oppressed here and you feel freer elsewhere?

(Joe) No. But we notice that there's a difference. So, we're wondering what, you know… others have experienced it as well. So, we're wondering if there's anything tangible to that or what might be the source of that perception?

A: Letting go of burdens. Your lives involve taking on the weight of the world and your group in particular. Also you probably also feel the protective bubble and the weight of protection.

Every home has its gravity and as Aristotle said over 2300 years ago "Nature abhors a vacuum".

In the days following my brother's departure I dedicated myself to change objects and somehow to fill gaps, I have a collection of CDs that I took out of the closet to fill the space where my brother's objects were. I took some boxes out of my bedroom to move them to the empty room.

Possibly the bubble of my home broke for a few moments, allowing the entrance of other energies or moving objects allowed the transit of the existing one as if it were an unconscious exercise of Feng Shui.
​

 

[Maya]

One month ago I got fired from my job because of reduction of employees due to crisis.
It was metal industry company in wich I worked for 5 years.
I worked as welder, assembler of pellet stoves and storagekeeper. And you know what, I could not be happier !
My sallary was great and it will be missed but workin with men, hard physical labor 9 hours a day really sucked life out of me.
Very bad basic relationships between coworkers and psycho department manager who did not let me do my job so he could keep his.

But last few months I was so done. No amount of Work could justify that much hardship and suffering for me.
It was just too much. My body was stressed out, stiffed and painfull all the time, and just could not get enough of rest.
Barely could take care of our household and have time for my teenager. Not to mention my husband.

I prayed that all that chasing ends or I will get sick or die soon.
To have some rest, peace and quiet.
To have a little racharge time for me,
honestly I don't remember last time when I did complete EE, cause I fall asleep after 5 min !

Hated every single day, cause no matter how much effort you put in everything it feels like Sisyphus is LOL back at me.

So now I'm like on 'long vacation' at home, I'm still very busy but it feels like peace - cooking, gardening barefoot, sleeping,
chilling with my ducks and chickens, having acctual long conversations with my kid.
Started embroidery project I wanted so long ago.
And I will continue romance novel project, reading that stuff really helped my marriage and helped understand my husband better.

He will still be extra avoidant, has really a lot narcisistic traits, would not work on that, laughts at me 'reading that BS'
- but he has his moments.
And I understand and finnaly accept that.
We are 2 worlds apart, we will never grow together, never have true intimacy, but whatever I choose he will support me
in every way he can. He just does not want to be involved.
We are freaking roomates, acctually.
'Feed me, clean me, wash me, leave me alone - that's pretty much it.
'F**k me' part we put asside cause I can't do that. It feels like robbery to me.

At the moment 'Don't worry I'll take care of you until you find out what you want' sounds reasonable and good for me.

I don't have strenght for divorce and I don't know what would I accomplish with that.

I'm 42, very often lonely, sometimes I think how cool it would be to have real, mature relationship with
someone who understands that loving is knowing, making real effort doesn't kill and to
whom any kind of reciprocity would be natural thing.

Omg. But someone outside this network is out of question. So, let's be real my odds are next to nothing.
And I have so much to do with myself and to walk my kid to adulthood.
She has 2 more years of highscool and God only knows what would this world look like even in that short period.
So.... NO.
I understand all the reasons for stayin or leaving someone, Laura elaborated that very well in The wave series.
But at the moment it's not in the picture for me.

At the moment it's essential for me to get some rest and restore back my health.
Yup, I know it all. Diet, sleeping, suplements, hormones, detox, sunlight, exercise, EE, ...etc.
And let's hope I'll be wiser soon.

Thanks for listening and hugs to everyone !
Take care

 

[Breo]

Maya:
At the moment it's essential for me to get some rest and restore back my health.
Yup, I know it all. Diet, sleeping, suplements, hormones, detox, sunlight, exercise, EE, ...etc.
And let's hope I'll be wiser soon.

Thanks for listening and hugs to everyone !
Take care

Thanks for sharing, Maya. I wish you a lot of restful recovery time

 

[Ricardo]

hey , OK , but don't let all that, become a day that never ends, set goals /boundaries.

 

[pinkfreud]

So now I'm like on 'long vacation' at home, I'm still very busy but it feels like peace - cooking, gardening barefoot, sleeping,
chilling with my ducks and chickens, having acctual long conversations with my kid.
Started embroidery project I wanted so long ago

I would love to see your embroidery project when you finish, if you care to share!

At the moment it's essential for me to get some rest and restore back my health.
Yup, I know it all. Diet, sleeping, suplements, hormones, detox, sunlight, exercise, EE, ...etc.
And let's hope I'll be wiser soon.

Thanks for listening and hugs to everyone !
Take care

Rest well, Maya. It is amazing how clear reality becomes when our bodies and minds are not ground down by overwork.

May the clouds part for you and show you the way, once you are done cocooning !

 

[Alejo]

Oof, that's awful Puma,

It does sound like your phone number and email was probably leaked somewhere online and then that information as sold to whoever. I would change passwords just to be safe. It's sad that it's very common these days to be in situations like that.

Also keep in mind that your reaction is normal and natural, but also.. sometimes these things happen for the express purpose of extracting that very reaction, you get into a defensive mode and that can make you lose focus and health overall if it lasts for too long.

 

[Tuatha de Danaan]

I had a dream this morning after I fell asleep during meditation practice . Its not where the dream started but its what

Thank you for sharing such a vivid dream lindrie: I have never experienced a dream that has a start and finish. Mine always seem to jump from subject to subject and that is when I do remember.

Your description is so vivid and flowing (no pun intended) it makes a lovely story. I'm so glad you decided to share.

 

[Tuatha de Danaan]

One month ago I got fired from my job because of reduction of employees due to crisis.

I am so sorry for the loss of your job whilst being really glad you have a chance to slow down and recharge,.
Nine hour days welding sounds so physically punishing you really do need a change.

but whatever I choose he will support me
in every way he can

I am also sad for your home situation but at least even though you are simply housemates, he has promised to support you.

Your assessment of your situation is level headed and once you regain strength and mental calm you can plan a very fluid future all the while you care and protect your daughter.

I'm sending good wishes to you for the present and into the future and
hope you will see positive changes as you go along.

 

[Maya]

Thanks for your kind words @Tuatha de Danaan , @pinkfreud , @Breo and @Ricardo

 

[Ramis1]

Greetings, I don't speak English and write through a translator. The state for today: the silence before the storm. A storm that everyone will pay attention to and maybe it will be unexpected for everyone, uncontrollable chaos, most likely first human and then natural or from space. It feels like it's already starting. The calm is ending. Does anyone feel like that these days?

 

[Ricardo]

Ending ? hah

 

[Natus Videre]

Greetings, I don't speak English and write through a translator. The state for today: the silence before the storm. A storm that everyone will pay attention to and maybe it will be unexpected for everyone, uncontrollable chaos, most likely first human and then natural or from space. It feels like it's already starting. The calm is ending. Does anyone feel like that these days?

Yes, it seems like evil forces are extending the agony. We've had 2 years of "medical rest" (no masks, no lockdowns, etc), but the tension is rising. It's hard for me to imagine that we'll still be here in 2030, but hey, I thought the same thing for 2024 back in 2019, and here we are! Part of me wants to see the chaos and witness the unification of enlightened beings against the oppressors.

 

[Ramis1]

Yes, it seems like evil forces are extending the agony. We've had 2 years of "medical rest" (no masks, no lockdowns, etc), but the tension is rising. It's hard for me to imagine that we'll still be here in 2030, but hey, I thought the same thing for 2024 back in 2019, and here we are! Part of me wants to see the chaos and witness the unification of enlightened beings against the oppressors.

I'm not psychic but sometimes I can sense that there is going to be trouble, today I had an unusual feeling, it's like standing on the beach and noticing that the water is too calm and the tide is too low and it feels like there is going to be a high tide or a tsunami. It's not a feeling of fear, it feels like retribution, I think the bad guys had a choice and they made a very desperate choice. And it feels like very soon, a lot of problems around the world one by one. That's my state of mind and that's how I feel, we'll see how it will be after a while. But the feeling is that there will be a lot of things at once and this will be just the beginning. I apologize in advance for my English, I write through a translator.

 

[Fluffy]

I'm not psychic but sometimes I can sense that there is going to be trouble, today I had an unusual feeling, it's like standing on the beach and noticing that the water is too calm and the tide is too low and it feels like there is going to be a high tide or a tsunami. It's not a feeling of fear, it feels like retribution, I think the bad guys had a choice and they made a very desperate choice. And it feels like very soon, a lot of problems around the world one by one. That's my state of mind and that's how I feel, we'll see how it will be after a while. But the feeling is that there will be a lot of things at once and this will be just the beginning. I apologize in advance for my English, I write through a translator.

Your translator works well.

I agree with you. I’m starting to notice a feeling of being in between worlds, it’s quite unsettling, it’s calling to me to find a new way of being as the way I have been no longer fits or works. There’s no comfort in the past or future, everything is shifting and the only way to get through it is to bend with the wind but I feel resistant to the change.
I liken it all to the most lucid dream I’ve ever had. Some days the feeling of this experience is so surreal, the light from the sun is so bright I can’t see through its glare and normal sounds are loud and obtrusive.
My body is hurting more than usual too.
But most of all a sense of urgency to find a peace of mind and heart that will sustain and carry me through whatever is coming.

 

[3DStudent]

I had one oddball baffling day last week. I was off work and wonder if it was a combination of a few things, but it was only on July 1st. Basically, I just felt very content and peaceful and had a lot of energy. It was kind of confusing, like, "Why do I feel like this!?" And I really wanted to know so that I could try to replicate it. Maybe it was just a taste of what could be? I went on the forum to see if there was something really positive or reality changing in the world, but I don't think so?

In any event it kind of eased up in the evening and I started to get tired. But I was glad for it, remembering that the C's said you can have only positive emotions (somehow?). I have been praying for help with personal issues, so maybe it was some kind of divine gift. But I think it could also simply be the combination of not working and having demands, sleep, taking melatonin, libido, cleaning, mild exercise, solitude and a storm having come through the previous night.

Anyways, it was noteworthy and I don't want to forget it and thus what is possible. Maybe I'm just in a funky mood lately so it stands out more. It was a rare, "Geez, I can't remember when I felt this good!"