Karmic and Simple Understandings.

Oxajil

Ambassador
Ambassador
FOTCM Member
I have talked with my brother and mother on the subject, and their replies were lukewarm to be honest. They know I can struggle in high-stress situations, and my last job was a disaster for me. I only lasted 6 weeks and I couldn't take it any more. Plus I had to conceal the truth about my schizophrenia from my employers in order to get the job in the first place.
It says here: "Under the terms of the Equality Act 2010, applicants are under no obligation to tell an employer about a mental health condition." So, I don't think there's a need to disclose it. Maybe down the line you could open up, like you did with the camping/outdoors job, but I'd guess it depends on the type of people and whether they're empathetic and understanding. Here it says:

What to tell the boss

A tricky decision is when and how to let an employer know about this illness. It’s a good question to ask your doctor.

"It depends on the individual and how well they have responded to medication," Jewell says. "If symptoms have essentially disappeared, there's really no need to tell an employer. Some people who have a less than complete response to medication may well need to [tell.]" If active symptoms get in the way of work duties, it might be a good idea to have a conversation with the boss about needs, such as doctor’s appointment times.

Frese offers similar advice. "It's a good idea not to advertise or tell people if you don’t have to," Frese says, especially at the beginning of your career. If you're older or nearing the end of your career, Frese encourages you to tell your co-workers. More openness about schizophrenia will help reduce the stigma.

I think in your case, your symptoms have mostly disappeared, except for the occasional appearance of snoopy entities, which just need to be ignored, and you seem to respond well to medication. So, I don't think there's a need to tell, but you and your loved ones would know best. I'd probably not go for high-stress jobs, and start out with working a couple of days a week and then build it up with time, according to your needs and capabilities.

In total I've lied by omission to employers 5 or 6 times since 2004. I'm deciding at the moment what I'm gonna do this year. Life is okay at the moment, but I'd like to have a bit more money, it's the financial situation that's driving me. Also I want to try something new in terms of work. In my past I've done bar/catering, retail, and a small bit of admin. To be honest I found them all a bit boring, apart from one 8 year spell when I worked in a camping/outdoors shop. I loved that job, and was lucky to be working with a very good small team, about 6 people and we all got on well. I opened up to management about my condition and they were supportive. Unfortunately the store was closed down by head office, otherwise I think I'd still be working there.
Ah, that's unfortunate, and I'm guessing working at shops is difficult at this point, with the measures, although I heard that the UK is going to let go of the corona measures? Maybe there are some other outdoors shops in the area? Or maybe you can reconnect with one of those 6 people and see where they are working now?
Unfortunately my CV doesn't really look good, what with me being out of work for 6 years or so. I'm gonna give it more thought before I make any big commitment,
You could say you did self-study during those 6 years. It's tricky. Maybe you could contact these people to ask for advice, on what to do when you have a break of 6 years, maybe they'll have some tips? I'm also tagging @Ant22 as she may have some tips as well. Being out of work for a long time doesn't necessarily mean you haven't acquired skills or growth, and so maybe that's something to think about and see what you can extract from that period and put onto your CV. Perhaps you've gained more discipline, improved your writing skills, or things like that. Just thinking out loud here.

If it turns out to be difficult to get hired, you could also consider taking on a volunteer job, and maybe that could lead to a paid position down the line. Or maybe there's a course you can take that'll make your CV stronger? I think that once you have an idea of the type of job you'd enjoy and fits your skills and you start taking steps towards achieving that, the Universe will take notice and hopefully nudge you in the right direction.

Just to add: These are just some suggestions once you've given it some thought and want to take a step, of course! Take all the time you need to figure out if you want to get back to work, where and how. It's nice to know that you can also discuss this with your family. :-)
 
Last edited:

SlipNet

Dagobah Resident
It says here: "Under the terms of the Equality Act 2010, applicants are under no obligation to tell an employer about a mental health condition." So, I don't think there's a need to disclose it. Maybe down the line you could open up, like you did with the camping/outdoors job, but I'd guess it depends on the type of people and whether they're empathetic and understanding.

Aha, I didn't know that, thanks for the info. In 2007, I took 3 months off work at the camping shop, with 16hrs a week sick pay. I thought that was very decent of them. I'm a social creature with probably a high openness trait according to JBP, so I prefer an honest exhange of ideas and information. Just feels more human.

I think in your case, your symptoms have mostly disappeared, except for the occasional appearance of snoopy entities, which just need to be ignored, and you seem to respond well to medication. So, I don't think there's a need to tell, but you and your loved ones would know best. I'd probably not go for high-stress jobs, and start out with working a couple of days a week and then build it up with time, according to your needs and capabilities.

Yeah, I can honestly say that I'm clearer and smarter and more communicative than ever before. In that sense the work has paid off in terms of self study. Apparently I can work for 10hrs a week and not lose my benefits, so I think that's the most sensible option. So kinda like 2 days a week doing 5hr shifts. I think I can manage that.

You could say you did self-study during those 6 years. It's tricky. Maybe you could contact these people to ask for advice, on what to do when you have a break of 6 years, maybe they'll have some tips? I'm also tagging @Ant22 as she may have some tips as well. Being out of work for a long time doesn't necessarily mean you haven't acquired skills or growth, and so maybe that's something to think about and see what you can extract from that period and put onto your CV. Perhaps you've gained more discipline, improved your writing skills, or things like that. Just thinking out loud here.

In a sense that wouldn't even be a lie, because I've been a very busy bee since 2014, reading and study have been a constant feature of my life. Peterson and Guyenot were excellent finds, and I'm into both their works to a significant degree. Plus I've got my journal and creative writing that I do too. My writing has improved in these past few years, reading more will always have that effect I think.

I'm just at the moment gonna scan the local job ads, just to see if there's anything of interest. I used to visit a local charity art studio and do drawings and paintings there, perhaps once a week I can get back into going there too. It's good to have the option there. I know the studio owner, he's a great bloke and we get on well. It's a nice sideline anyway.
 

pecha

Jedi Master
FOTCM Member
While I started this thread about a fairly general concept, I think in my recent months I've been honing down the details about just what I actually understand in this crazy, bewildering world. It's a question which I find very good for grinding the old mental gears, and a fine way of consolidating hard-earned lessons and the spoils of battle. I came here seeking answers, truth even. I've learned way more than I could ever have imagined, the last 20 years of my life have been time well spent in that regard. But life has given me a jolt in the last few weeks, making me re-appraise my goals in the time I have left on the 3d STS plane.

In the last month one of my Aunts died unexpectedly, she had no underlying conditions whatsoever. She was my Dad's little sister. She was just 72, and fit as a fiddle, always out and about. We had the funeral last Friday, and it was a very emotional time. I didn't know her really well, but I always liked and respected her, she was a very capable woman with a big heart. She was a devout catholic, and by all accounts a good rotarian in how she lived her life. She put others ahead of herself, along with bringing up two fine kids who I can happily say I like very much. They are bringing up families now, keeping the lines going with good people. And this is what hit me at the funeral, just while I was chatting and socialising. No family line will come down through me. This saddens me on a very deep level as it turns out. I understand that these emotions could well be very negative and STS-oriented, but they persist nevertheless. And while I was dealing with this little episode about my life, I was then inundated with a slew of accompanying emotions and worries. I'll talk about these below.

I dread the day when I lose my parents. That was the big one. I cannot imagine anything that has more potential to derail my soul, and yet I know that this is inevitable in the future. Hopefully at least another decade away. Thankfully I have a good extended family, along with a very sound younger brother. My parents were the sole reason why I got the AZ jab, because I really didn't want to. But I share a home with them, and I couldn't risk passing onto them "the coof"; even if it didn't harm me, it could have grave repercussions for them. So I grudgingly took my medicine, knowing that it was doing me no good.

I realised at that moment that I am a strange mosaic of STS and STO impulses. And I also then had to face that I am very concerned about where things stand say about 10 years from now. The future could become a very lonely place if I don't make efforts now to prepare for the sad inevitabilities of life. I've got to make greater efforts in terms of networking, not just on here, but also in my local community. No man is an island, and I don't want to be one in any case. In the last 6 years or so my social network has shrunk considerably, mainly through bereavement. All my elders in my circle seem to be departing. I guess it was just "their time to go", and all I can do is honour their lives while being there for their loved ones if I know them. These things are on my mind every single night when I go to bed, without fail. I also think I need to pray more, I tend to pray maybe once a fortnight, no more than that. I question whether I have a good connection with the DCM, although this is a concept I'm working on understanding in my own way.

So my Karmic self is in a bit of a state these days. My coping methods are lamentable at best. Today I was very vexed by circumstances so I chose to get a 4-pack of beer to deal with things. Beer! What a douche I can be at times. I've had 2 beers today. Even though I keep my diet fairly stable, I have a real weakness for beer. It just relieves stress in an instant. By comparison tea or coffee are just a bit......tame. And less effective. But I understand that beer is ultimately a crutch that I have to learn to be without. But it's really hard to say no to it when I know full well that it has a positive short-term effect, and I never get drunk per se, 4 beers then I stop. It has become a regular pattern in recent months, definitely since the first lockdown. I know things have to change. In my plans for this year I decided to rejoin the FOTCM, after stupidly quitting many years back when I was going through a severe psychosis. Never make life choices when going through a trauma, it was a big mistake by me. This was about 7 or 8 years back I think; much has changed since then, and my life is in a much better place generally since then. Mentally I'm way stronger. I've put the effort in and made great strides in my learning on a variety of subjects. Still a long way to go however.

Anyway, that's where I'm at at the moment. If any of this resonates with any of you I'd welcome any constructive feedback. I'm not on the rocks at this point but I understand that the time is now to make necessary changes and preparations for our at this point nebulous future. Thank you for reading.
Howdy, fellow schizo here! It was interesting to read about your growth here and in your other journaling thread you created. I had my episode 3 or so years ago and it has changed my life for better and/or for worse (and even then, the "worse" has a silver lining in that there's potential knowledge gain and polarization). If I let it, I can be super sensitive to things like EMF, hardships, and predator mind conundrums. Ever since, I had to be in a constant state of vigilance--even in states of rest! It is a sort of upkeep that I found is truly worth it, since otherwise it could be disastrous. This upkeep in some way relates to the mind/body/spirit connection.

In the Wave series book 8 (chapter 69), Laura outlines how our neurotransmitters have an effect on our emotions, and that their sources can be from different sources. One source are programs that have been embedded in us through routine task, childhood, friends, etc. which may or may not be healthy. When we encounter a situation, certain programs go off, which release neurotransmitters that effect one's emotions. Another source could come from the soul integrating with the body when it fully seats, which is one of the objectives of the Work. It was very fascinating to read for the first time, and whenever I think about emotions I'm feeling, I've a better picture of how the whole body-machine works.

Here's a short section from that chapter:
The Wave 8: Chapter 69 said:
What seems to happen when yogis and fakirs learn to control their perception of pain is that they are able to gain access to this area of the brain with conscious intent and to reset the pain threshold. That is to say: reframed by conscious expectations and subconscious beliefs, pain can be abolished by being interpreted as either a neutral experience or even pleasant.

And this is our Ace in the hole. We can make ourselves unavailable as food; we can change our systemic responses so that the Matrix unplugs us and dumps us out of the system just like Neo was unceremoniously plucked from his pod when he “woke up.”

I've been smoking recently and found that it helps quite a bit. The Cs say that it increases psychic defense, and it is true in that it promotes the production of the neurotransmitter, acetylcholine, which promotes a state of vigilance and awareness. Its other benefits include increased memory & learning (low ACh levels are found in those with dementia), attention, motivation, cognition, and immune defense (increased T cell mobilization). Though, if I smoke too much, I find that I get headaches, which erases much of the benefits from it :lol:
 

SlipNet

Dagobah Resident
Howdy, fellow schizo here! It was interesting to read about your growth here and in your other journaling thread you created. I had my episode 3 or so years ago and it has changed my life for better and/or for worse (and even then, the "worse" has a silver lining in that there's potential knowledge gain and polarization).

I think it was a necessary condition to have to go through. It may seem drastic to say, but I've discovered much more, and many memories, as a consequence of falling into the schizophrenic world. In many ways I was a person of compartmentalised little factions within prior to my breakdown, and, most crucially, I was completely unaware of these divisions before. So it was a silver lining to rediscover these old little i's, and I feel a bit more together as a person having gone through the process of recapitulation. Before my illness I didn't care much for introspection; since 2004 it has become a crucial part of my arsenal in soul growth.

I've been smoking recently and found that it helps quite a bit. The Cs say that it increases psychic defense, and it is true in that it promotes the production of the neurotransmitter, acetylcholine, which promotes a state of vigilance and awareness. Its other benefits include increased memory & learning (low ACh levels are found in those with dementia), attention, motivation, cognition, and immune defense (increased T cell mobilization).

Smoking is an absolute boon in this 3d STS world we find ourselves in. I couldn't do without it in my life. I need it more than food at times. It centres me, so I never let myself get strung along by negative thoughts and feelings. It helps to keep me grounded within my core being. I honestly cannot imagine being a non-smoker now. I don't know how I dealt with problems in my psyche before. I have lost close family members to dementia, and it pains me to reflect that they would have been much better off if they had smoked. It was really startling to see good people completely erased before my eyes, they lost all connection to themselves and the world around them. I'm not gonna say they would have been fine if they'd smoked, but I'm convinced it would have helped to mitigate pathological factors
 

Ant22

Ambassador
Ambassador
FOTCM Member
Life is okay at the moment, but I'd like to have a bit more money, it's the financial situation that's driving me. Also I want to try something new in terms of work. In my past I've done bar/catering, retail, and a small bit of admin. To be honest I found them all a bit boring, apart from one 8 year spell when I worked in a camping/outdoors shop. I loved that job, and was lucky to be working with a very good small team, about 6 people and we all got on well. I opened up to management about my condition and they were supportive. Unfortunately the store was closed down by head office, otherwise I think I'd still be working there. Unfortunately my CV doesn't really look good, what with me being out of work for 6 years or so. I'm gonna give it more thought before I make any big commitment,
You could say you did self-study during those 6 years. It's tricky. Maybe you could contact these people to ask for advice, on what to do when you have a break of 6 years, maybe they'll have some tips? I'm also tagging @Ant22 as she may have some tips as well. Being out of work for a long time doesn't necessarily mean you haven't acquired skills or growth, and so maybe that's something to think about and see what you can extract from that period and put onto your CV. Perhaps you've gained more discipline, improved your writing skills, or things like that. Just thinking out loud here.
If it turns out to be difficult to get hired, you could also consider taking on a volunteer job, and maybe that could lead to a paid position down the line. Or maybe there's a course you can take that'll make your CV stronger? I think that once you have an idea of the type of job you'd enjoy and fits your skills and you start taking steps towards achieving that, the Universe will take notice and hopefully nudge you in the right direction.

Thank you for the tag Oxajil :-) @SlipNet you've already received some useful feedback and tips above and although 6 years is a long gap to have on your CV it's not a complete show stopper. I worked closely with the recruitment industry in the UK for many years and I have seen people work their way up quickly despite such obstacles as career gaps multiple times. So with some dedication and perseverance I think you can get there.

The first thing to address is what you have been doing during the past 6 years. Anything that you could spin in a positive way? Anything that required using transferable skills that may be useful to future employers? It's hard to suggest an answer without that information. But even if you spent those 6 years not doing anything professionally useful you can still find a decent job. It will most likely not make you the money you're after straight away but you can work your way up from there. I'd say aim to get something recent on your CV ASAP, and once you have that you can look for a better opportunity.

Oxajil mentioned volunteering and I agree that this would be a great starting point if you struggle to find a paid job. It would help you start covering the CV gap and even if it's boring you could only volunteer 2-3 days a week just to get back on the horse and get used to a daily routine. There are lots of remote jobs out there so you wouldn't be limited to searching only in your area. Here are a few UK sites you could look at for more info and to search for opportunities:

NCVO Volunteering
Volunteering Prospects
UK Government volunteering resource
Royal Voluntary Service
Total Jobs: Volunteering opportunities

I'd say, it will be easier to avoid high stress than boredom as most jobs out there will require at least some dose of doing repetitive and unengaging tasks. But you can treat it as doing what 'it' doesn't like :-)

As for writing your CV, it's always a good idea to filter its content through the needs of your potential employers rather than treating it as an autobiography. If you're unsure how to do it, I'd suggest the following activity: when you read a job advert and you think to yourself you could do the job, what makes you think that? Is it something about your natural inclinations or talents? Your personality traits? Skills you gained in your previous roles? And then incorporate the answers into your CV. Make sure it's not just a dry document but something that shows your employers that you are the right person for the job - not just someone who has the right skillset (the latter will initially be difficult due to your career gap so falling back on softer skills will be useful). You can post some ideas here if you think it may help you.

When your CV is ready and you start applying for jobs, always make sure you follow up each application with a phone call. Most people don't like exposing themselves to possible rejection so they just send their CV to employers and wait for someone to contact them. You already have a disadvantage many other candidates don't have (long career gap) so I'd suggest being more proactive than them. They're competition you need to beat and it will be easier to do it in the areas they won't try to compete with you. And given how much most people dread the call it's fair to say you'd be one of very few people who will do that.

Before you make your call put together a short speech about yourself and why you're interested in the role. This will save you a huge amount of stress and discomfort involved in trying to improvise a great pitch. Very few people are good at improvising, especially when they are selling themselves and their skills to potential employers.

You can also record yourself practicing the call. In my experience most people think they sound well on the phone but that's usually not the case. Make sure you only record the audio, you want to hear yourself teh way an employer will hear you.

A small tip I can offer is smiling when you call a recruiter or a potential employer. This is the key advice given to people who work in customer services or sales, both face-to-face and over the phone. Here are a few articles about that little trick and how effective it can be when you're selling yourself:

Smiling on the phone: does it really work?
Smiling on the phone can increase sales production
How a simple smile can increase sales

I hope this helps a little but if at any point you have any questions or doubts please do network about them here. I've never seen someone who wanted to work not be able to find a decent opportunity sooner or later, even if it took 1-2 stepping stones to get the right one.
 

SlipNet

Dagobah Resident
Thank you @Ant22 for a response that is so well thought out. Your input is very much appreciated.

The first thing to address is what you have been doing during the past 6 years. Anything that you could spin in a positive way? Anything that required using transferable skills that may be useful to future employers? It's hard to suggest an answer without that information. But even if you spent those 6 years not doing anything professionally useful you can still find a decent job. It will most likely not make you the money you're after straight away but you can work your way up from there. I'd say aim to get something recent on your CV ASAP, and once you have that you can look for a better opportunity.
I've volunteered at a local charity shop for 7 months, been an associate in a charity art studio for 18 months, and sold a number of paintings and illustrations. I've also been published in 3 Poetry Anthologies too. My lifestyle has been fairly frugal, living off a share of benefits and a small fund of inheritance from a well loved Aunt who died. Life hasn't been bad, and I've kept myself busy in terms of artwork, writing, reading etc. I'm not expecting big money, to be honest just earning a few hundred pounds a week would keep me comfortable with my benefits. Just has to be less stress-inducing than some jobs I've done before. I'll never do catering again, that's for sure. I worked with alcoholics and psychos in previous stints.
Oxajil mentioned volunteering and I agree that this would be a great starting point if you struggle to find a paid job. It would help you start covering the CV gap and even if it's boring you could only volunteer 2-3 days a week just to get back on the horse and get used to a daily routine. There are lots of remote jobs out there so you wouldn't be limited to searching only in your area. Here are a few UK sites you could look at for more info and to search for opportunities:
I'm only considering paid work though, I kinda need it for a better quality of life. I've done voluntary jobs before, but I kinda felt I was being taken for granted, and my cash level remained low. Maybe I'm being a bit 3d STS about this, but money is the main driver for me here. I'm fine for food, shelter and tobacco as I am at the moment, but if I want to treat myself a little, say a new book, a CD etc., then I struggle a bit.
When your CV is ready and you start applying for jobs, always make sure you follow up each application with a phone call. Most people don't like exposing themselves to possible rejection so they just send their CV to employers and wait for someone to contact them. You already have a disadvantage many other candidates don't have (long career gap) so I'd suggest being more proactive than them. They're competition you need to beat and it will be easier to do it in the areas they won't try to compete with you. And given how much most people dread the call it's fair to say you'd be one of very few people who will do that.
I've done phone work before, for a Department Store and for British Gas. I've been told by employers that I've got a good phone voice, proper diction and a decent manner. I pride myself on my communication skills as an English Lit graduate. I can phone people up with no worries, I can front up if necessary.
Before you make your call put together a short speech about yourself and why you're interested in the role. This will save you a huge amount of stress and discomfort involved in trying to improvise a great pitch. Very few people are good at improvising, especially when they are selling themselves and their skills to potential employers.

You can also record yourself practicing the call. In my experience most people think they sound well on the phone but that's usually not the case. Make sure you only record the audio, you want to hear yourself teh way an employer will hear you.

A small tip I can offer is smiling when you call a recruiter or a potential employer. This is the key advice given to people who work in customer services or sales, both face-to-face and over the phone. Here are a few articles about that little trick and how effective it can be when you're selling yourself:
Ah, this is a bit of a problem with me. I genuinely have a problem with smiling, apparently my front doesn't incorporate this particular skill. Maybe it's a little ennui coming across in dull jobs? This has come up in previous jobs I've had. Apparently I come across as stern at times, when it's just me in my default self. In bar jobs I was asked to be more cheerful. I can do it on the phone way better than in person, probably because I'm always smoking a cig when I'm on the phone. Perhaps I need to work on this more. Once I'm engrossed in conversation things improve, but apparently this isn't always the case from feedback I've received. I've lost jobs for having a truculent demeanour in the past. We're talking about gigs I did over 20 years ago however; I like to think I'm a more externally considerate person now as a 47 year old. This is making me think more carefully about what type of job I want to be doing. I've got a reasonable sense of humour, but apparently it tends to only manifest itself once I'm in a pub post-work. That's honest feedback that I've had from mates. I need to chill out more in a potential workplace. I don't want this to come across like I'm some kind of asshole, I'm not, but the feedback has always been along the lines of "cheer up, it might never happen". Maybe I do need to be more cheerful in life in general. I have been a fairly solitary person since about 2012. I regularly meet my parents and brother, but not much else. Visiting the town centre at a busy time is my way of getting me better used to social living, that is the task.
I hope this helps a little but if at any point you have any questions or doubts please do network about them here. I've never seen someone who wanted to work not be able to find a decent opportunity sooner or later, even if it took 1-2 stepping stones to get the right one.
Thank you so much for your concise and intelligent input!:-) I'll be sure to post on this thread any further points or questions I have. A lot of people have really struggled over lockdown sice 2020, but I've managed to even improve my self a bit these last 2 years. I just need a basic job that gives me a few hundred bones in the bank each week. I just think that now is the time to do a little bit more and then I can enjoy my life a little more too. Hey, I'm an STS creature still, I'm doing what I can.:lol:
 

Ben

Jedi Council Member
I suppose the understanding which I now find has come to me is that no matter how awake you become, you are always in danger of being lulled back to sleep. My experience has been that I took a certain amount of the knowledge gained here, applied it sporadically and without enough networking or understanding, and the (it feels in some ways) wasted years by just getting by in a half wakeful state

The other side of this coin seems to be that once a certain state of awareness is achieved, you can never truly go back. It takes a lot of denial and all the pressures of the system around you to get by in this state. But part of you knows the awareness will stay, waiting, for as long as it takes.
 

Olivierlejardinier

Padawan Learner
The other side of this coin seems to be that once a certain state of awareness is achieved, you can never truly go back. It takes a lot of denial and all the pressures of the system around you to get by in this state.
Hi, fully agree on this, I feel the same at the moment in my life. I have this in mind too, the C's said : Allways expect attacks. It seems very important to be fully aware of this, even when you're feeling "good" and even more when you're "down" :-)
 
Top Bottom