Éiriú-Eolas - Breathing Program

[Sonrisa]

This is something that I notice sometimes -- although never when I do the full program in the evening, only when I recite the POTS in my mind as I go to sleep at night. It happens when my eyes are closed, and during and after the POTS, I'll see flashes -- sometimes dim, other times brighter, like a camera flash going off. I don't know for sure if it is connected, but it's something that I'd never noticed until this year, when I had already been doing the POTS at night for awhile.

Speaking of lights, a couple of weeks ago, I was asleep and was awoken by a light. There was no light on in the room when I opened my eyes. My perception of it was a faint small glow in front of my eyes and a little above me that grew slowly into a really bright glow that woke me up due to its over powering brightness - wide awake. I was going through a bit of a difficult time emotionally during the preceding days, so I'm not sure if that was related. It was interesting, though, on the 'light topic'. During POTS, I will occasionally see lights, faces, scenes and, rarely, just zone out with no memory, though that's not happened for a while.

I've been "seeing" quite a lot of the "flashes of light" when my eyes are closed, doing the POTS. They are usually red or white, sometimes other colors. I have also occasionally seen flashes of scenes, or people, but they haven't been anyone or anywhere I've recognized. But I am sleeping MUCH better since the light flashes started - nice, but weird.

 

[dugdeep]

Hmmm, I don't know if mine was similar, but it's possible. When I awoke and opened my eyes, nothing was there - I was just woken up because this light 'behind my eyelids' when I was sleeping grew so bright I couldn't stay asleep. I think if I actually saw a glowing ball that said hello, I'd be more than just very awake, very fast! (as in running out of my front door!)

Definitely sounds like an an interesting experience, dugdeep!

Ah, I see. I misunderstood your experience. Perhaps it's not the same thing. And I probably would have run if I hadn't been so shocked! I didn't feel threatened, just blown away!

Very strange about your visitor -- I hope it was nice Next time see if you can get a name ;)

I'll see what I can do. I'll be sure to send your regards too, Shijing ;)

 

[shijing]

Very strange about your visitor -- I hope it was nice Next time see if you can get a name ;)

I'll see what I can do. I'll be sure to send your regards too, Shijing ;)

Sure thing :D But if it's very social, just be sure to tell it that I have very specific visiting hours

 

[thevenusian]

I've really come to love going to sleep with POTS and pipe-breath. About a month ago I came awake early in the morning because the room seemed bright with light, but when I opened my eyes it was still dark. I see scenes and faces, too. Sometimes a progression of different faces of all types, races, ages- one after another. It only happens after reaching a certain degree of stillness, and not always. I don't recognize any of them and have wondered what it means. Are they associated with me in some way? Impressions I've collected?

A few nights ago right before falling asleep I was thinking very calmly and followed a train of thought...and then suddenly realized it wasn't a regular thought, it was a dream. But I wasn't asleep, and it came in just like a thought.

 

[Aiming]

I'd be glad for feedback.

I have the answer to that now, fwiw. Given that I'm currently dealing with (to me) particularly unpleasant emotions, I think that it was related that I would suddenly remember what truth seeker had written back then about permitting DCM to help. In short, it was about me wanting to get it over with as fast as possible, i.e. hoping that thereby the processing of these emotions would be occurring faster and easier. As well as not so painful. Interesting how easily I can lie to myself.

 

[Ollie]

My experience of the E-E breathing meditation programme this week is similar in many respects to last week. The full programme was done on both Monday and Thursday; once again I experienced unconsciously shutting down my breathing, almost forgetting to do it, during BaHa. On Thursday my eyes were particularly wet all the way through from the start of listening to the tape, at the end of PotS tears were in my eyes.

On Wednesday, in bed, reciting PotS lying on my back for a change, I too noticed a face, a painting of suntanned sailor, superimposing itself on my face for a short time; a first for me.

 

[Turgon]

I'd be glad for feedback.

I have the answer to that now, fwiw. Given that I'm currently dealing with (to me) particularly unpleasant emotions, I think that it was related that I would suddenly remember what truth seeker had written back then about permitting DCM to help. In short, it was about me wanting to get it over with as fast as possible, i.e. hoping that thereby the processing of these emotions would be occurring faster and easier. As well as not so painful. Interesting how easily I can lie to myself.

Trying to hurry your conscious labours and intentional sufferings, as Gurdjieff said. I had been doing the same thing as well lately, until I remembered those two phrases again and thought about the deeper meaning behind them. Good thing you caught it! :)

 

[Gawan]

Ditto on those last parts. Lights, faces, scenes have still been occurring occasionally, but zoning is rare at the moment. Lately I've been having trouble sleeping, which isn't normal for me. Night before last I woke up at 4 a.m. in one of those half-sleep states where the mind is feverishly occupied with what seems like impossible math equations. Couldn't fall back asleep after that. Then, last night I slept a glorious 12 hours (!). I had a "traveling" dream, which I don't have very often. Hoping I can reset my clock and get some regular sleep from here on out!

Also this week I needed much more sleep than usual and woke up in the middle of the night and used this chance to write some more or less weird dreams down. The last dream from the day before, was so intense or emotional packed, that I carried the feeling of that dream all day long with me.


Today I could do the session from Thursday, cause of sleepiness in the last days.

The overall session was very relaxing, with kind of feeling heated, especially in the prayers part. The heat feeling started in the feed. And I really like the warriors breath, to shout out all that buried stuff.

The beatha portion, was quite intense, lots of memories came up and with that also tears. During the prayer I did zone out, between two phrases, where I thought that it took ages, but it has been just seconds. :)

Very strange about your visitor -- I hope it was nice Next time see if you can get a name ;)

I'll see what I can do. I'll be sure to send your regards too, Shijing ;)

:D And a photo too, better be prepaired next time. :P

 

[mada85]

A few weeks ago I had to stop doing the Monday and Thursday full session as I was becoming too full of tears that would threaten erupt at any moment, and this would interfere with my ability to function at work. I was also doing the POTS in bed before sleep, but was doing it myself, without the audio. I changed my programme and now I'm doing pipe breathing and POTS every morning (no audio) and Laura's audio before bed in the evening. My emotional cleansing has lessened in intensity, and now it is every two or three days that I find the tears coming, and it is much easier to function in my everyday life. Recently I have been overwhelmed by regret for past mistakes – life choices I have made that have not been aligned with what I really wanted. This all stems from the narcissistic wounding of my childhood when complete self-denial became a way of life.

Anyway, onwards and upwards

 

[seek10]

I want to give update on my EE. I am doing as usual ( multiple times pipe breathing a day and POTS when ever I feel stressed) , more consistently before sleep. Recently I had a rolfing session. Very intense emotions came out when he is rolfing at pelvic area. It is the same emotions of 'this is too much , I can't take it' feelings, that I was getting this since I started EE, but not sure what to do those emotions . I used to feel embrassed when ever I get those emotions, I used to write it and move on. Now I know these feelings are stuck in the body from early childhood. It is the dominant emotion when I do EE.

Recent relaisation of ADD allowed me to identify all my guilt and shame are due to 'inability go beyond some limited capacity' and It has disappeared and I was able to withstand the attacks more easily. How many times I read psychology stuff, this guilt used to start the pain cycle over again. There is lot of pain and shame related to my failure to remember things and some ridicules I faced from my Ex. and possibly my parents too. This realization allowed me to identify the painful emotions I was getting when ever I watch my self are mere childhood predatory coping mechanism ( feel embarrassed to read 3 yrs old posts on programs and to say Aaha) . All these last 2 yrs I am watching my programs with another programs and I ignored the negative introject component of it and stressed my self. Another component of my stress feelings of its 'futility of Job' . This is some thing I need to address pretty soon. Still lot to do on concentration, memory, controlling negative emotions.

I am revisiting nutritional component that created ADD in the first place 30 yrs back. Though I am doing diet for more than 2 yrs, had notes of up and downs, last 6 months has been tough with work and went little slow on the lectin stuff. I will be starting anti candida diet to take care of the some yeast part again( as I ate more fruits to compensate for the nuts during recent month) and started to taking much more seriously lectin part of it, started eating Lot's of fat. Infact i put up some weight too. In fact, I loose weight , if I fast for 2 days and gain weight too quickly. surely, time is running out.

I started taking large quantities of vitamin C. I used to take 5g to 10g per day previously. When I increased vitamin C recently, I observed that lot of anxiety in office disappeared and made me calm. So I increased it to 22 grams for a week. yesterday, after a week of holidays, even 5 grams vitamin C created loose motions.

I occasionally I do 30 min. POTS. Recently I did POTS for a 35 min continuous, I woke up with mild headaches. not sure whether I overdid or some changes with in. Recent realizations made me much positive after some time, though there is a feeling 'I should have done better' and I should have remembered consistently all my programs.

Some times I see faces watching into my face very closely particularly in meditation if I allow my mind to wander. after some time they disappear. some times I get images like yellow walls etc. Most of the time I am either focused on the meaning of POTS or lost in thoughts.

 

[Tigersoap]

Just to report back on the EE, I also have a few flashes of light sometimes but I had them when I was young as well so I never really paid attention to them, I always thought there were some kind of visual hallucination before falling asleep.

For the moment during the baha I get more lifelike images that I can remember like a Ufo landing on my head o_O or a homeless man asking me for money and my dreams are quite vivid and very strange.

The last time I did the whole program it seemed that I was struggling a bit to let go and totally relax into it if that makes sense, I did zone out during the POTS though.

 

[Aaron r]

EE has effectively snapped me out of the funk that facing up to reality brought on in me. I have changed city and job. I feel stronger in making decisions about my life. Even if it turns out poorly I have the inner resources to not falter.

Because emotion no longer builds up inside me like it used to, I no longer feel the need to drink alcohol to release the pent up emotions. My temper due to frustration is also resolving because frustrations no longer build like they use to.

I no longer fear the future. I genuinely feel so very lucky to be apart of the FOTCM. I don't know why I should be so lucky.

 

[jordifs]

This is to tell you my personal experience after 1 year and a half of practice.

- My detox has effectively leveled up. Now if eat something that is not good, my body reacts almost immediately. Very high sensitivity, my nose do not let me breath (it is like a dog nose detector).
- I lost weight, 80 to 72 Kg. My pants size lowered from 47 to 42.
- My general appearance changed as I lost "volume" (not inflated as before). I perceive muscular mass downsizing (even on the chest).
- I also perceive my body in general is acting differently:
* I do not swear
* I can stay for long without having a bath. My body/skin does not smell. The longer I stay the 'more healthy the skin looks like'. When having a bath skin immediate reacts during 1 or 2. Very dry, like dead skin after burning to the sun.
* I can even stay several days without the need to defecate. Always depending on what I eat. If i eat just a single 'bad thing', the same day it is 'out of my body'.
- My eating habits changed so I can pass days eating a few amount of food. 2 dishes per day (one for breakfast, one for dinner, no launch at all). I feel perfectly fine, and with high productivity during the day at the office. Nonetheless I'm revisiting this habit, because eating a little bit for launch, I see my 'energy grows' during night, so I can stay longer reading news/articles/sott/forum and also for other personal initiatives. Punctually I ate a lot, 3-4 dishes and I see how my digestive system gets rid of everything, my stomach does not inflate, and a lot of energy fill my fingertips. It's like feeling I'm able to project the electric charge through the fingertip. Really weird as this happened to me during meditation, not during “normal life actions”.
- I feel more keen-sharp and agile in facing challenges / problem-resolution. Most of the time at the office. At home I've detected this playing chess. I am a very bad player. I recently started playing with very inteligent children (6-8-12 years old), and yes they are able to match my level. I practiced with the computer on level 'easy'. I always loose (100%). Now I win.

To these only to confirm already exposed issues such as:
- zone out,
- electric feeling on fingers,
- heat on the hands/feet,
- also on the face front and the corona
- lately also uncontrolled crying, but not during the meditation.

I also started to dream, to remember some concepts and to write them on paper. I detected, a posteriori, an issue that look to me somewhat as 'precognition'.

I wish to continue and even to intensify it. I do feel the whole process just started and I want to further increase the effects as possible. I do not remember to be as healthier as I am today.

 

[Approaching Infinity]

* I can even stay several days without the need to defecate. Always depending on what I eat. If i eat just a single 'bad thing', the same day it is 'out of my body'.

Sounds like you've experienced some good changes, jordifs! This above stood out, though. As far as I know, you should be having 1-2 bowel movements a day. Some of the health experts may be able to chime in, but this may be something to look in to.

 

[herondancer]

Hi Jordifs[,

AI is right. Your system should be clearing itself every day. How much magnesium are you getting? Magnesium citrate cna be very "encouraging" to the elimination system. If you check the Diet and Health section, you'll find some threads on it. Other than that, it sounds like the changes you've made have been enormously positive for you.

Good stuff!