It's been quite a while since I last time reported about my EE progress and experiences. Mainly because there was nothing (or it seemed so to me) to report.
Last night's EE was a little bit different.
3-stage PB went as usual, with little bit more saliva production, the feature that started some months ago, which, after introducing myself to polyvagal theory and observing other things about my system, I ascribe to slow increase in parasympathetic (NA) system activation. This is something that I'm still working on though, so any definite conclusions at this stage would be premature.
WB began also as usual, with little dizziness/light headiness after first round. Just before third round, I remembered something Oxajil wrote way back, about implementing "determination", so I did third round with more determined attitude, joyous, with a sort of a smile on my face, but more firm.
Beatha part began normally and somewhere in the first round I felt strong pain in my right leg. It was very localized, some 10 cm above the ankle, on inner/left side of the leg. As I've been advising people recently not to push/force themselves too hard (which produced positive results for them, and also seeing the same advices here recently), thought came that maybe I should switch back to normal breathing pattern. On the other hand, I remembered an article on EE website specifically about bioenergetic breathing and needing sometimes to endure kind of discomfort, and since pain wasn't unbearable, I proceeded. And by the end of Beatha pain disappeared. Also, whole Beatha breathing was kind of different, whole inhaling and exhaling was in a way smoother than usual.
Few PBs before POTS were also smoother, with almost no saliva at all.
And then came the POTS part.
Almost as soon I heard Laura's voice saying first POTS, strange feeling/sensation appeared in my head. It was like, with my eyes closed, my mind was seeing/observing things from higher position, if that makes any sense. Like something was activated in there (head) and that intellectual center stepped on higher ground. I had some glimpses of a similar sensations in the past, during which time I was swimming in the swamp of New Age stuff, so expectedly all kinds of New Age BS thoughts came jumping in shortly after this sensation occurred last night. Previously these thoughts patterns would quite easily produce annihilation effect, but last night my mind just observed them, with sort of a smile on "his" face, and watched them pass by. The sensation remained through the whole POTS part, and after Laura finished I continued with POTS on Croatian in my head, during which sensation slowly decreased, not disappeared, with pronounced sensation of slight heaviness in frontal part of my head. With this "high observer" sensation subsiding, other "usual" sensations (like energy flows, "plate on my head", mass under the ribs and in chest, ...) became more noticeable.
As I became more accustomed to this strange "state" I started slowly to drift away, during which a visual appeared; I was standing (or sitting) in front of very high hedge, the hedge was all in flowers (I can't say what kind exactly) and going in a semicircular way in front of me, with me at the center of imagined circle. Well, at the point where I became conscious about what I was looking at, my mind jumped in with "stupid" thoughts like "Is this a fence?", "What's behind it?" and the visual just dispersed.
In the morning I woke up with a hangover and slightly stiffed back of my neck. The "high observer" sensation was gone, but that haven't been bothering me, in fact I haven't even thought about that until just now writing this post. Funny...
Anyway, hangover disappeared by the end of large dose Vit C "lemonade" and the neck stiffness is almost gone too.
