Éiriú-Eolas - Breathing Program

NSD said:
I want to ask when i do pipe breathing every day i do it with prayer in mind is it good or better to concentrate only on breathing?
Beside that i have prayer many times in my head during day.

If you master the breathing, I don´t see any problem in to combine prayer with breathing, but I think is good do some breathing before start the prayer.
 
RedFox said:
D Rusak said:
Ugh, today while practicing EE (only did the meditation last night so decided to do the full version this morning) I became *really* tired at the end and fell asleep for about 1.5 hrs. No biggie, as I had the entire day free, but meanwhile, my landlord came into the building without notifying us (he only has to if he comes into individual apartments) and left the door wide open while showing some empty places. Meanwhile, my bike, which has been safely stored in the hallway for nearly a year without problems, got swiped by someone while I was having my EE nap. Well, can't say I wasn't warned ("be vigilant") :(

Hi D Rusak
It might be worth considering the symbolic nature of this. As with the pan handle breaking being a message from Laura's higher self....perhaps having the door left open and your bike stolen is also a message to yourself?? What parts of you do you leave 'out in the public view' that can 'be taken' without you noticing? Who in your life (or past) leaves 'doors open' in you so that this can happen?? What is being 'stolen' from you??
Bikes being a form of transport could symbolise transport, greater freedom, facility to provide for yourself - get to work/food/friends (independence)...it may also symbolise your 'carrage' - body, or 'horse' - emotional centre. But these are just my interpretations.
If it was your own personal apartments door that was left open by the landlord (and not just the apartments communal door) I would take this as quite a major warning. fwiw

Hmmm, not sure. It wasn't my personal apartment door, just the door to the building. I was home when my bike was taken. Interesting idea, I hadn't really thought about things that way at all. The first thing that comes to mind re: parts of me that are left out in public view refers to my website, on which I post my upcoming gigs, and mention what schools I teach at. My mom has done things like call up the schools repeatedly asking where I am, then when I talk to her she gets upset since I haven't told her every detail about all my gigs, and then tells me, oh, you can't do this gig, you can't be a musician, and then this spiral into this whole thing about how irresponsible I am, etc. It used to make me pretty upset. I had cut off contact for a while, and hadn't updated my address with them for a bit. Earlier in the summer I decided to confront this issue by telling them that I was an adult, and did not feel it was necessary to tell them every bit of information about my work. I acknowledged that they did not agree with my living or career choices, and that they may think they are trying to watch out for me, but I am free to do what I want and feel fits me best. I also capitulated and mentioned info about one or two major gigs so as to include my mom a little bit (I don't think she's a total nutjob, just that she's been as affected by narcissism as a lot of people are, myself included, and she also wants to not be cut out of my life completely) and gave my mailing address. That seems like it has ameliorated the tension greatly, I don't feel anxious or guilty or bad about that situation at all. But I guess what was "stolen" in my previous interactions with my mom was emotional energy. I also have had some disruptions lately in my sleep schedule (see "Broken Body Clock" thread), I guess that energy has been "stolen" as well. Not sure on this one to be honest.

Otherwise, I have lost much work this year- lost two big teaching gigs which totaled over $20,000. But I am happy about this in a way since then I don't have to work a job that I don't like and can focus on playing my instrument and the teaching that I do like- working with individuals one on one. I have many gigs so far this fall (keep my fingers crossed) so things should be all right financially, at least for a while. And my friends have been great- I have a network of them finally!- several people offered me a bike to use.
 
D Rusak, shouldn't the superintendent of the building be responsible for your stolen property? Maybe a good idea would be to get some renter's insurance to protect your investment in the material things in your apartment if something like this happens again?
 
I have renter's insurance, it just is a nuisance to find a new bike like the one I had, that's all. Plus I have no idea how long it will take to process my claim, I just have to wait now for their forms.

As far as the building goes, they say no, it's not their fault, since I didn't have the bike in my apartment, just in the hallway. Even though THEY were the ones who left the door open (arrgh). Also they said it's not their fault, that's what renter's insurance is for.

Sorry for venting guys, just thought it was curious because it happened exactly when I fell asleep very deeply during the meditation session, which is not something that usually happens, I usually am awake the whole time.
 
Dawn said:
Edit note: I'm a bad speller and sometimes make up words that may or may not have been created. Like Consciencness. I'm pretty sure it's a word. (?) It always underlines the word in red as if it's a spelling mistake. Have no idea. I'm probably making connections that have no basis?

Hi Dawn, I've noticed quite a bit on the forum that the words conscious and conscience are used interchangeably. In your post if I am not mistaken, the context was in terms of 'consciousness,' i.e being conscious, aware/awake; whereas conscience has a different meaning, the quality of having or not having a conscience is what regulates our thought and action as to what is acceptable and moral behavior for us. I think the word you were intending was consciousness.

Putting both words in context we might say... 'I became conscious that what I had done was pricking my conscience.'

So although related and intertwined the meaning is different. You might want to check out the cassiopaea glossary http://glossary.cassiopaea.com/glossary.php for clarification, and one of the dictionary sites. _http://dictionary.reference.com/?regHome=true
Hope this helps your (?) My conscience is pricking me because I am conscious that I might be 'preaching' here. :-[
c
 
Cathryn said:
Hi Dawn, I've noticed quite a bit on the forum that the words conscious and conscience are used interchangeably. In your post if I am not mistaken, the context was in terms of 'consciousness,' i.e being conscious, aware/awake; whereas conscience has a different meaning, the quality of having or not having a conscience is what regulates our thought and action as to what is acceptable and moral behavior for us. I think the word you were intending was consciousness.

Putting both words in context we might say... 'I became conscious that what I had done was pricking my conscience.'

there is also this, which might be useful:

Gurdjieff said:
Conscience is a state in which a man feels all at once everything that he in general feels, or can feel. And as everyone has within him thousands of contradictory feelings which vary from a deeply hidden realization of his own nothingness and fears of all kinds to the most stupid kind of self-conceit, self-confidence, self-satisfaction, and self-praise, to feel all this together would not only be painful but literally unbearable.

If a man whose entire inner world is composed of contradictions were suddenly to feel all these contradictions simultaneously within himself, if he were to feel all at once that he loves everything he hates and hates everything he loves; that he lies when he tells the truth and that he tells the truth when he lies; and if he could feel the shame and horror of it all, this would be the state which is called 'conscience'. A man cannot live in this state; he must either destroy contradictions or destroy conscience. He cannot destroy conscience, but if he cannot destroy it he can put it to sleep, that is, he can separate by impenetrable barriers one feeling of self from another, never see them together, never feel their incompatibility, the absurdity of one existing alongside another.

and also:

Gurdjieff said:
In speaking of evolution it is necessary to understand from the outset that no mechanical evolution is possible. The evolution of man is the evolution of his consciousness. And 'consciousness' cannot evolve unconsciously. The evolution of man is the evolution of his will, and 'will' cannot evolve involuntarily. The evolution, of man is the evolution of his power of doing, and 'doing' cannot be the result of things which 'happen.'
 
Dawn said:
Edit note: I'm a bad speller and sometimes make up words that may or may not have been created. Like Consciencness. I'm pretty sure it's a word. (?) It always underlines the word in red as if it's a spelling mistake. Have no idea. I'm probably making connections that have no basis?

Hi Dawn,

Yes you have misspelled consciousness. When you see the red line underneath, it means that this is an unknown word/spelling error.

If you hold your mouse over the word that is underlined in red and right-click, it gives you a list of words that you might have meant. Usually, the correct spelling of the word you want is there. You just click that word and it will correct your spelling. I use it quite frequently. ;)

Hope this helps you.
 
Thank you all. Well I did a quick search on the word/non-word Conscienceness, and at least one other person is making up this word:
A Forest Conscienceness
(Hardcover, 2005)
product.half(dot)ebay.com/_W0QQprZ71151371

The spelling tool you mentioned Nienna, will come in handy for a terrible speller, and maker up of words. :)

Edit note: Not promoting the book, just showing one that uses the same mis-spelling.

Nienna Eluch said:
Dawn said:
Edit note: I'm a bad speller and sometimes make up words that may or may not have been created. Like Consciencness. I'm pretty sure it's a word. (?) It always underlines the word in red as if it's a spelling mistake. Have no idea. I'm probably making connections that have no basis?

Hi Dawn,

Yes you have misspelled consciousness. When you see the red line underneath, it means that this is an unknown word/spelling error.

If you hold your mouse over the word that is underlined in red and right-click, it gives you a list of words that you might have meant. Usually, the correct spelling of the word you want is there. You just click that word and it will correct your spelling. I use it quite frequently. ;)

Hope this helps you.
 
agni said:
In general I feel more in touch with my inner self. Feel self-reclaimed. Now I have more energy, more motivation, more vitality, more in balance, less reactionary & more observant. In one word - I haven't felt myself so "together" for a very long time :)

I did not have any emotional episodes in conscious state so far, but been having a few in my dreams. I clearly recalled crying strongly in one of the dreams, when it involved a deceased relative. Other dreams involve people & situations with unresolved conflicts/feelings. These dreams are very vivid, and sometimes involves people I did not know, but apparently knew quite well in dreams.

I was too early to post of the results. Week after the post I have started to have some emotional episodes. I did not realize how much anger was hidden within self. It quite scared me, because I had some uncontrollable bursts coming to surface, like confronting parents to stop emotional manipulation when encountered one. To me this is quite unusual, I rarely express any anger. What scared me the most was an absence of external considering at the moment of confrontation from my side.

Furthermore, all of my hidden & forgotten fears, unresolved situations, personal issues all starting come to the surface. They feelings associated with it are very intense, to the point I feel like I am going to explode or have a nervous break down. It has discouraged me at first, but now I see it as a good opportunity to learn from it as much as possible. And actually feel strong desire to deal with all of that. These issues are also almost daily seen in my dreams.

Another thing I have noticed, now I seem to have very low tolerance towards any kind of manipulation in general and it's arises feeling of anger. However, something does not seem right, because as I've mentioned earlier, I seem to have difficulty exercising external considering when such episodes occur, only post factum.

I have been doing exercise twice a week, but lately been skipping due to the fear that I would be overwhelmed by such episodes to the point I would not be able to handle this anymore.
 
Hello all.

Just wanted to report on an experiment that I tried yesterday. I've had a mild flu that went into bronchitis and a sinus infection, and for a few days I couldn't breathe through my nose at all, even with decongestants. Wondering how that could be possible, I got the headphones on and sat up in bed to go through the EE program. It was tough at first, but by concentrating and relaxing at the same time, by the second time through the EE program, my nose was clear! I haven't taken a decongestant for my nose since, and things are draining and healing.

Its a little thing, but great when you can't breathe. ;)

When going through the program the third time, I fell asleep, and was jolted awake in time for the prayer. It was like my nervous system was making sure I paid attention. :D (Or the higher self, if its there.)

A small progress, but every step helps.
 
agni said:
I was too early to post of the results. Week after the post I have started to have some emotional episodes. I did not realize how much anger was hidden within self. It quite scared me, because I had some uncontrollable bursts coming to surface, like confronting parents to stop emotional manipulation when encountered one. To me this is quite unusual, I rarely express any anger. What scared me the most was an absence of external considering at the moment of confrontation from my side.

Hi, agni.

Fwiw, I went through about a 2-3 week period of irritability after doing the program a while. Is there anyway to just limit your interactions with others for a short time until this subsides? Also, I noticed for me, there were a few dietary changes that needed to be made. Do you read the Diet and Health Board? There's some great information and advice there if you're not familiar with it. If possible, I'd still recommend doing the full program twice a week and the pipe breath and prayer daily. It will help you process what you're going through. If that just seems like too much, perhaps then just the pipe breath and prayer daily until you recover some balance.
 
Black Swan said:
agni said:
I was too early to post of the results. Week after the post I have started to have some emotional episodes. I did not realize how much anger was hidden within self. It quite scared me, because I had some uncontrollable bursts coming to surface, like confronting parents to stop emotional manipulation when encountered one. To me this is quite unusual, I rarely express any anger. What scared me the most was an absence of external considering at the moment of confrontation from my side.

Hi, agni.

Fwiw, I went through about a 2-3 week period of irritability after doing the program a while. Is there anyway to just limit your interactions with others for a short time until this subsides? Also, I noticed for me, there were a few dietary changes that needed to be made. Do you read the Diet and Health Board? There's some great information and advice there if you're not familiar with it. If possible, I'd still recommend doing the full program twice a week and the pipe breath and prayer daily. It will help you process what you're going through. If that just seems like too much, perhaps then just the pipe breath and prayer daily until you recover some balance.

Hi Black Swan,

Thank you for the advice, limiting interactions with others seems like a good idea. No one deserves to deal with my emotional diharia. Now I constantly bear this in mind not to fall for same again.

As far as dietary changes I believe I am up to speed, except for coffee may be (absense of it gives me headaches)

Well, I was thinking the same about returning to breathing regularly. Need to have more trust to higher self and what it's doing.
 
Looks like some people are getting some action. I guess I'm gonna have to either record a talk about what to expect, or write it.

Clearing stuff is not going to be easy for everyone. I think it depends on the depth of the individual. Deeper people just simply suffer more. That's my take on it, anyway. Of course, it's no comfort when you are going through it.

The good thing is: it IS a changing of reality from the inside out. It is a step toward 4 D awareness. Those people who go through it in advance, are way ahead of the game, I think. And I'm sure that some people can go through something like this without a breathing/meditation program, but just simply via shocks - but that's horribly unpleasant too. Probably even worse.

The first stage of the process was, as I have described in Grace, back in the mid-to-late 80s. That was a direct result of my breathing/meditation practice which ya'll are doing pretty much as I did it then. Thing was, I meditated EVERY night along with doing controlled pipe breathing at the beginning (only) of the meditation. I would then relax into a more normal breathing pattern as the meditation proceeded.

So, that was the first BIG layer of stuff that came off.

Following that, there were a LOT of changes in my life that, looking back, I directly attribute to this cleansing. Each change led step by step to the Cs Experiment. Now, everyone isn't going to go through this exactly the same because everyone isn't gonna be channeling as I did it. So just take this in a general way.

The Cs project was a more conscious way of accessing what was in my subconscious/superconscious. Most of ya'll will get there without having to go through this painful, protracted process. I'm just a really stubborn, strong-willed person and often my stubbornness manifests in resistance to what is good for me. I'm hoping ya'll can avoid a lot of that misery.

Anyway, so the Cs project was, in itself, an initiation and a cleansing of nonsense in my head, belief centers, emotions, what have you. And it was seven months after that began, in February of 1995, that the next big layer came off. So, we are talking about a spread of about ten years in between two of the major events. I think it had to be that way for me because if I had to go through it all at once, it probably would have killed me.

The fusing of my emotional center began in February, as I mentioned, and it was one heck of a process! It was like losing my mind. It is recorded in the sessions though in a very obtuse way. I did NOT want to tell ANYbody what was going on in my head/innards. So I tried to ask questions about it without being too direct. Oddly enough, there was a "death link" to the event which makes me wonder about PepperFritz's death in a new way. It was "Frank''s" father. He committed suicide. The thing is, he looked a LOT like my grandfather and I really felt a connection to the old guy even though I only interacted with him a few times. So, it was kind of a trigger when he died, I guess.

Anyway, here is the clip from the session when I first asked about it. (Interestingly, it was my grandfather's birthday):

11 Feb 1995

Q: (L) Well, I have some personal stuff I would like to ask
about without mentioning it specifically, can I do that?
A: Whatever you desire!
Q: (L) Well, something has been going on with me internally
and I just don't know what it is. I don't even know who I
am right now. I am at odds with myself, it seems. What
is going on? Why am I so irritable?
A: You are being defensive, letting go of old stuff.
Q: Well, I am trying not to be irritable.
A: You try too much. Stop attempting and just "Go with it!"
There is no need to steer, no need to drive, just ride!
Q: Well, that is very hard for me to do when this energy
threatens to overwhelm me.
A: You have always been a driver, that is the old stuff to
let go of. Why resist? This is why you have been
irritable. Your super consciousness is telling you
something.
Q: (L) Why did this feeling begin when Frank's dad passed
away? Why do I feel now that I don't know which way we
are going to go?
A: That was a steppingstone, a "milestone", if you like.

Well, things didn't get much better. As I have said before, it was like having my solar plexus blown wide open and all the emotions in the Universe flowing through me like a hurricane. There were times when the only thing I could do was curl up in the bed and rock and cry and try to hang on to my sanity. I really did think I was going mad!

Dabrowski refers to it as "positive disintegration" and "disintegration" is a good word, but I'm not sure about the "positive" part - at least not while you are going through it.

The next time I tried to ask about it was a week later on Feb 18th. Again, I was really being covert about my question. I also think that the energy of this session, which was quite chaotic, reflected what was going on in me:

This is the session where I was asking the Cs about my state covertly. Notice that I say "a week ago" because I wanted it to seem like a single event and not an ongoing thing because I felt like I was crazy.

Also notice the total craziness of this whole session which was a reflection of the state I was in. You can read from my notes what I thought about it. Any questions that were "outright" may be not so accurate, but I think that the "covert" questions were on target.



February 18, 1995

Frank, Laura, Terry, Jan, DM

Now, this is one session that I believed to be corrupted. The woman, D__,
was the probable cause - but there was also a STRONG conflict between her and
Jan. There were a LOT of peculiar things about this whole session, as you will
see. The whole "personality" that came through WAS D__, as we were to find out
later. But, also, there WAS some of the C's energy coming through. I
think the first clue I had was when they abbreviated the word "Cassiopaea,"
which was odd... almost as though it were a clue that I was only going to make
a partial connection.

Q: (L) Do we have anyone with us?
A: Stop.
Q: (T) Stop what, our discussion of all this weirdness?
A: No. And it is not weirdness.
Q: (T) What does "Stop" mean?
A: Close doors.
Q: (L) Well, that is weird, they have never been
bothered by the household noise before. (We closed the
doors.) Who do we have with us tonight?
A: Teiurannea.
Q: (L) Okay, why did you want the doors closed and are
you going to give us our answer?
A: There is usually too much interference from outside
influences.
Q: (L) And we have with us...
A: Living room contains too much noise and static.
Q: (L) Well, they have never complained about it
before... (J) It must be the t.v.... (Laura instructs
children to tune down television and get quiet.) Don't
you like Star Trek?
A: Not problem.
Q: (L) What is the problem?
A: Noise and innocent banter.
Q: (J) It's the kids. (L) Well, they will be going to
bed soon...
A: You will not have control of this session, so don't worry
about asking silly questions, as before!
Q: (L) Well, that doesn't sound very friendly, does it?
(T) Are you going to impart some information that you
want us to just listen to and absorb?
A: Sometimes friendliness must be set aside to get your
attention and redirect wavelengths.
Q: (T) You have the floor, redirect.
A: Pause... wait for important information to be directed
through our channel. You forgot id inquiry.
Q: (L) Where are you from?
A: Cass. Children are not cooperating. (Laura sends children
to bed. Much negative feeling engendered thereby.) Thank
you. You need to be more open, remember, we are you!!!!!
Q: (L) Who is not being open?
A: Not issue. Can you imagine what it is like to look at
yourselves as you once were, and to know you still are,
and must communicate with yourself on a most
unconventional level for union of purpose?
Q: (L) No, I don't think I could imagine that.
A: Well, try!
Q: (L) I am trying. I guess it would be like looking at
yourself as an infant.
A: Okay. Continue.
Q: (L) Well, getting into the mindset of an infant we
find that they have very little awareness of what is going
on. Their awareness is primarily focused on meeting their
personal needs, themselves, food, comfort, and the adult
is worried about whether the roof leaks, whether the wind
is going to blow the windows in and whether the wolf is
going to come howling at the door, is that pretty close?
A: Progress!
Q: (L) So, you find us to be a bit trying at times?
A: We are you, you are us, we are litterally one and the
same.
Q: (L) So, you don't find us trying because it would be
difficult to find oneself trying, but it is still possible
to be dissatisfied with an aspect of one's personality?
(J) Or, like loving someone and seeing what they could
be and being a bit impatient that they are not?
A: Wow! What a concept!
Q: (L) Alright...
A: Laura, you still think we are a separate entity from you.
You go around saying to people: "The Cassiopaeans said
this, the Cassiopaeans said that." Don't you know it is
you as you will be?
Q: (T) Faced with the fact that they were like this back
then and they are trying to deal with it as it is, and
they are trying to convince themselves back now, to open
up enough to listen to ourselves there... or something
similar to that. (J) Well, I think they have patience
with us.
A: Close, Terry. It is fun to us to listen to you as you!
Q: (T) Cool! It's nice to know that I am entertaining
myself in the future.
A: As us!
Q: (T) But, it's got to be frustrating because when you
were us in your past, in third density, you didn't know
enough to be able to communicate with yourself in the
future. (J) Well, maybe they did. You don't know
that.
A: Wrong! What do you think this is!
Q: (L) This is the future, the past, the present...
(T) But, it is hard for you to understand that now as
us stuck in 3rd density... they are me, we are all
together, coo coo cachoo! (J) It's hard for us, it's
not hard for them. (T) They are us, we are them.
A: Not hard for us in either point of reference.
Q: (T) Then why is it hard for us here to perceive what
we there seem to understand? (L) Maybe it is not as
hard for us as we seem to think it is. (T) Well, how
do we get past it, then? How do we get to the point where
we perceive what we need to perceive? (J) Let it go.
A: You are past it.
Q: (T) So, just by the fact that we are doing what we
are doing, we are past that point. Now, all we have to do
is to be able to open up more to be able to do this
correctly?
A: Bingo zingo!
Q: (T) Obviously someone else of us likes to say "Bingo
zingo," which you got from us back then when you were here
because I never said "Bingo zingo." (J) It was AL.
(T) Al, the hologram said bingo zingo...
A: Or maybe you changed and decided you liked to say it!
Q: (L) Alright guys, can I ask a question. I have had
something bugging me all week.
A: Ask if you must, but we are going to have fun tonight.
Q: (J) I also want to ask about that sleep interruption I
experienced. (T) We always have fun... why don't we
let them run their stuff out... (L) Okay, run your
stuff out...
A: No Laura, we are not the Lizzies; this is Cassiopaea
calling. Worry not, channel is now permanently locked in,
but damn those tapes!
Q: (L) You are giving me the heebie-jeebies guys.
A: You are too serious.
Q: (L) Well, somebody's gotta be!
A: No!
Q: (T) Well, you were going to give us some important
information here... that is what you said in the beginning
of this session...
A: All in due time, but first, we want to have some fun.
Q: (L) Well, go ahead. I want to see this happen, do
it.
A: Lighten up, Laura. This is your other persona talking
directly to myself!
Q: (J) This does not make sense. I don't like it when I
can't understand it...
A: Persona. Jan, you always had trouble with the pens and
pencils after you/I learned the computer!!!
Q: (J) That's true! I have to block print.
A: Now it's me/us, Jan.
Q: (J) So it was your persona talking to you, Laura.
A: Forget it, Laura, it was just only one of many, many
learning experiences! They all enriched us tremendously.

Q: (L) What am I supposed to forget that was the
learning experience?
A: Lifetimes of "woe."
Q: (T) Is this one of her/your lifetimes of woe?
A: They all are if we choose to view them thusly.
Q: (J) I have a comment to make to the Cassiopaeans.
(T) Does this include 4th density life as well? (J)
I may have a hard time writing, but half the time I am
already anticipating what they are going to say and am
writing ahead, so they should cut me some slack. (L)
Cut her some slack, guys. (T) Cut, cut!
A: Slack cutteth!
Q: [Laughter] (T) I'm glad to know there is still humor
when you get up to 6th level!
A: There is a lot here, not nearly enough there. Dear Jan,
give the pen and paper to D__.
Q: (T) A dear Jan letter! [laughter] (D) I guess I'm
sitting over here getting stuff too. I've been feeling
kind of like a fifth wheel anyway.
A: I,we, heard, D__. By the way, this is us talking!
Q: (T) By the way can be abbreviated BTW, guys.
A: BTO.
Q: (L) What does that mean? (T) By the other?
A: Bachman Turner Overdrive!
Q: [Laughter] (L) Well, Terry, if you didn't know that
one you are really in bad shape! (T) Emerson, Lake
and Palmer! Electric Light Orchestra! (L) Well, I
just want to say something...
A: Okay, Laura, ask it if you must.
Q: (J) I want to ask about...
A: Laura first, we/she is about to jump out of her/our skin.
Q: [Laughter] (T) Ask away, my dear. (L) I wanted
to ask, now you guys are going to be mad at me because I
am going off on a very serious tangent...
A: We know, just ask it, already!!!!
Q: (LM) Is that New Yorkese? (L) The question I
wanted to ask...
A: No, L__, Miami Jewishese!
Q: [Laughter] (LM) I thought they were in Cornucopia, not
Miami! (J) Just spit it out! (L) My question is...
(T) She forgot! (L) No, I didn't forget, I just
have to figure out how to word this. As you know, I am
reading this book about Holocaust victims reincarnating
and remembering their experiences at this time. The
question is, on one occasion you told us that the Jewish
people, as a racial group, were Atlantean descendants, is
that correct?
A: Some.
Q: (L) There is some. Can you give us that some?
A: No.
Q: (L) Is there some karmic element that was fulfilled by
the Holocaust?
A: Of course.
Q: (L) Could you tell us what karma was being expunged in
that activity, and what group the Jews represented?
A: This is not germane, but it was Atlantean overseers
"expunging" guilt from that life experience.
Q: (L) So...
A: So what?
Q: (L) A couple of weeks ago I had an experience where I
woke up in the morning and felt as though my tongue had
been torn out. I felt the sensation of something unusual
having happened. I would like to know what this was.

A: It is not important.
Q: (L) I know you say it is not important, but this had
some very serious ramifications for my physical body.
A: As always. And, have we not advised to concentrate less
upon physicality?
Q: (L) Well, the point I am trying to get at is, if I was
hauled out in the middle of the night by a bunch of
Lizzies, or whatever, and worked on, I would certainly
like to know about it. I know it's physicality...
A: You were not.
Q: (L) Okay Jan, ask your question, if you dare! (J)
If I dare! I had an experience last week where I woke up
about 20 minutes after I had gone to sleep, screaming my
head off, because there was something standing by the bed.
What was that?
A: Now Jan, you indeed were taken!
Q: (L) Who took her?
A: Our friends, the Grays.
Q: (L) What did they do?
A: Study update on psychic database.
Q: (T) [question lost]
A: Mirth should never stop!
Q: [question lost]
A: Wrong concept.
Q: (T) Was Jan startled and screamed at the sensation of
passing through a window?
A: Don't need windows.
Q: [question lost]
A: Usual abduction experience, as you are familiar.
Q: [question lost]
A: Okay.
Q: [question lost]
A: Yes.
Q: (T) The event seemed to have lasted, in our illusion
of time, 20 minutes, because I was in the living room
watching the television while this happened. But, the
experience that happened to her may have lasted longer or
shorter in our perception of time, correct?
A: Yes.
Q: (T) So, when she screamed... (J) Did I stop the
abduction by screaming?
A: End, conciousness level border.
Q: (T) So, when I came into the bedroom, it had just
finished?
A: Yes.
Q: (T) I had nothing to do with the ending of the event?
Her screaming just alerted me.
A: You were diverted.
Q: (T) Well, that's easy enough to do for me. I'm easy
to divert! Give me a computer screen and I'm diverted.
A: All are.
Q: (T) I'm in good company.

Break

Q: (J) I have a follow-up question. After that happened,
Terry made the comment that he...
A: D__, please join board!!
Q: (J) Do they want all four of you? (L) No. I don't
want to talk to them tonight, they are being ugly!
(D) They are making me feel awfully important!
A: Ugly is subjective. We are you, Laura.
Q: (L) I'm not sure I believe that.
A: Why would we be ugly to ourselves? But we understand
imprisonment of physicality and its biological tendencies.
Q: (L) What kind of a snide remark was that? (T)
They are just telling you that you understand. (D) We
are just talking back and forth to ourselves. (T)
They are us. We are us.
A: Snide is your, and also our, perception. Alas.
Q: (L) Well, sorry, but it seems to me that you guys are
wasting a lot of time and energy. I mean, we stay up late
at night to do this and...
A: Who determines waste factor?
Q: (L) Well, that's just my opinion.
A: Ours, too!!
Q: (T) Cause they are you and you are them... as the
Beatles said: "Coo coo cachoo, we are the Walrus!"
(D) Can't we just ask if they have something important
to dispense to the human race or something like that?
(T) Is there something more in the light of what you
said earlier?
A: Is in process of being dispensed.
Q: (L) And when is that going to occur?
A: Is occurring now.
Q: (D) Well maybe this whole thing is just to let us
realize that we are talking to ourselves from the past...
A: Part. Why resistance.
Q: (D) I guess we just understand it and we are waiting
for the next thing.
A: We are not separate from you. Once this is recognized,
progress will be made!

Q: (T) Yeah. You are us, we are you. (L) Alright, I
want to ask what it was that I went through about a week
ago when I felt like I was getting all kinds of stuff
pumped into my system that I did not seem capable of
coping with in terms of emotional control. What was going
on?

A: Answered about one half hour ago as you/us measure time.
Q: (L) I don't remember asking a question about it or
getting an answer. (J) You asked about your tongue.
(L) I'm not talking about that.
A: No.
Q: (L) What are you talking about... the past life
business?

A: Yes.
Q: (L) Well, what precipitated that activity?
A: Ions charged by awareness opening in window of EM
envelope, used to precipitate physical trauma in immediate
surroundings. "Used to" refers to past tense.

Q: (L) Okay, so in the past, this kind of opening of a
window in the EM envelope...

A: You have elevated.
Q: (T) You made a connection with other life experiences,
and you were able to experience them in another way.
(L) Well, it had some damn strange effects, that's all
I've got to say about it! I wasn't very happy about it.

(T) Will she be experiencing more of this now that
she's made this elevation?
A: Yes. Each episode will be easier and easier.
Q: (L) Thank God! When do these guys get to enjoy that
particular... (T) We haven't gotten to that point yet,
or we may experience it in a different way. Is that it?

A: Sort of, each has their own issues.
Q: (T) Well, we are all doing different things as we move
forward. (J) We all have different issues to work
through.
A: Why wish agony upon another?
Q: (L) I don't wish agony upon another, I just want you
guys to appreciate the utter agony...
(T) They do
appreciate... (J) And we do too... They went through it
with you. You didn't go through it alone! (T) They
are you!
A: Why wish agony upon another, all have personal trials,
would you/us like to share?
Q: (L) In other words, be grateful that it wasn't worse.
(D) I would like to ask a question because you
probably understand it and I do not. If we are 6th and we
are also 3rd, in the future, will we be another 3rd and
another 6th... (F) In our 3rd density perception, since
our time is linear and we are looking at us in the future,
talking back to us in the present, but it is all happening
at once because there is no real time. And, probably, I
guess this also means that one day, which is also today,
we will be 6th looking down here... (D) We will be
doing the same thing over and over? (F) Sort of yes
and no... I don't think we can quite grasp the whole
thing... (T) The problem is...
A: You will grasp it when at 6th level!!! So, rejoice in the
"here and now!"
Q: (T) Even at 4th we will understand more than we do
now. They are giving us concepts that are beyond third
level. They are working with us to prepare us so that
when we move into 4th we will have a head start on what's
going on. They are bringing us up to where we already are
because we came from 4th level to come here to do this
originally, to set the frequency and hold it so that
others can move to 4th level. We came from 4th density to
do this. They are trying to give us enough information so
that we will remember... (F) It is kind of like Hansel
and Gretel going into the forest and leaving a trail of
crumbs so that they can find their way out. We came back
from 4th to 3rd to do what we've got to do and we're going
back to 4th but we've got to leave a trail for us to keep
connected to where we came from... something similar to
that, in any event. (F) Is your mind exploding, D__?
(T) We, where we are now, don't grasp all this because
we are not supposed to at this level.
A: Learning. Laura just gained one more strand, that is why
it was so painful, okay?

Q: (D) Say! Congratulations! (T) Yup, she gained
another strand and made Reiki Master! (L) I am in a
bear of a mood! (T) Mirth! You in 6th density are
enjoying the hell out of you now. We are going to take a
break. (F) You gained a strand of DNA?

{unrelated questions edited out}

Q: (L) Alright, I want to ask a question. This is a
trick question. It involves mind-reading. Please answer
the question I am thinking.

A: Your dreams are valid.
Q: (D) My dreams are valid?
A: No.
Q: (T) Laura's dreams?
A: Yes.
Q: (T) What dream? (D) your dreams are valid, Laura.
(T) Was that your question? (L) Well, sort of.
It could apply. (T) They answered your question before
you asked it. (L) Yeah. I wasn't going to ask it
out loud anyway. (T) If we could just get them to
skip the questions and go to the answers, we would make a
lot better time here.
A: Have.
Q: (L) In other words, my impressions of the ultimate
outcome of this DNA switcheroo is...

A: Yes!
Q: (T) Any other questions?
A: Go to Pensacola.
Q: (L) Who wants to go to Pensacola?
A: I do, I do. [Laughter]
Q: (T) Is something going to happen in Pensacola?
A: Conference.
Q: (L) Is there a conference in Pensacola? (T) It's
in October. (J) Are you talking about the October
conference?
A: One before then.
Q: (T) There's another conference before the one in
October? I don't know anything about this other
conference.
A: Increasing activity in Florida panhandle, vortex. If you
go to Pensacola you will see UFOs of all origins including
yours truly.
{unrelated discussion edited out}

There are several clues in the above session about the cleansing/moving toward 4 D process.

There's no words really, to describe it. You really do feel shattered, in pieces, hopeless and helpless and every emotion in the world is slamming right into your solar plexus.

Like I said, I often just curled up on the bed to rock and cry and feel sorry for myself at every stage of my life, and in every life I ever lived, and feel sorry for everybody else around me, those I hurt and who hurt me and didn't mean it... and so on. Gads! Well, I can't say I don't wish it on anybody because it is the real dark night of the soul - the valley of the shadow of death - and you have to go through it to be born. But I do wish it wasn't so hard and traumatic.

But it is worth it. It really is. To finally find that one little piece of yourself that is authentic, to grab it and hold onto it for dear life and begin to re-build yourself according to what is really YOU and not a bunch of crap that you had to invent to survive or crap that other people projected onto you.

You should also be able to suppress it a bit as long as you make appointments with yourself to let it all out later. I had to do that because I still had to take care of the kids and the house and everything. And it would come in waves... when it got really bad and I thought the pain was going to force me to leave the body, I would just rock and repeat: "this will pass, this will pass, this will pass... I feel it now, I felt it then, let me drain the last drop of it and it will pass..."

Somehow, that got me through it.

I started reading through the subsequent sessions to try to jog my memory about stuff. That was in February of 1995 ... and Tom French and Cherie Diez were in the picture. I had a lot of pressure on me to "act normal" and I did pretty much after the initial couple of weeks of feeling like I was falling apart "at odds with myself" "don't know who I am" "don't know where to go" and so on. But there were some things throughout that year where whatever went on in this second "cleansing" and opening, that now, in retrospect, seem to be connected.

For example, there was the accident therapy in the background (hmmm... maybe ya'll ought to get some bodywork done?) and then the strange episodes with the "eclipsing of realities" that came about in July of that year - a year after the Cs came. I think that was an event of making a choice at some subconscious level and even though I wasn't aware of it at the time, it set the stage for what happened later (divorce, Ark entering the picture, etc).

The dreams I was having were pretty powerful, too. A lot of stuff was just dumping. I was living a lot of the time between two realities. I could close my eyes and still see... I heard constant conversations kind of like what is described in "Operators and Things". Some of it was creepy. I slept with a radio playing all night long and put yellow bug lights on the porches and left them on all night.

If ya'll will read al-Arabi (Chittick's "The Sufi Path of Knowledge") about unveiling, states and stations, you'll see that he pretty much describes a lot of this. Just ignore the Muslim gloss.

Apparently, you have to get used to running a stronger current on your circuits and after awhile, you acclimate.

I was interacting with a LOT of people. I didn't know where anything was going with the Cs or whatever - in fact, I was kinda depressed throughout because of the deterioration of my marriage and my attempts to continue to deny that. Then, I had the dream in September of that year about getting married and dancing and it left a powerful impression on me of hope even in spite of all the misery I was experiencing in my life. Then, I had the other event and saw Ark's face like a total hallucination. Like as real as the book in front of me on my desk.

So, the year proceeded and then, finally, 13 months later, I asked for a separation and a little more than 3 months later, Ark came. The interesting thing about this is that I actually DID go to Pensacola, and it was there that I had a dream about being kissed and waked up, kind of like Snow White or Sleeping Beauty. The kiss was so real, so intense, that it actually woke me up and I could still feel a "presence". Tom French and Cherie Diez were at the conference in Pensacola with us, and I told them about this strange "dream kiss" the next morning at breakfast. The odd thing about it was that from that moment, my attitude about everything changed. It really was like being awakened.

So, yeah, it can be a process and it can last for awhile and it seems that it can involve a lot of different elements and phenomena. It's actually kind of exciting to me to think about it now. Of course, at the time, I was SO afraid - just afraid of about everything. I was afraid of changes, of what I didn't know or understand, or what might happen tomorrow, or next week, and so on. A real worry wart needing to be in control of everything in order to feel semi-secure/safe. I was cranky when anything happened that was out of the ordinary or not what I wanted or expected. I had very little tolerance for anything or anybody that was not under control, so to say. I was grouchy, irritable, easy to fly off the handle, easily frustrated. I had no idea at that time that, 13 months later I would step out of my world and into a totally different reality where "safe" had a completely different meaning.

But it did take about a year to get used to the higher energy flow, the level of emotional content that went with it, and so on.

So, I hope this helps some of you to know some of the things that can happen and how to cope with it. Just remember, this is stuff that is living inside YOU... and you can either clear it out, or continue to stuff it and remain as you are. It's a choice.

But, from where I sit, it sure was worth it!

EDIT: removed a couple segments of the session that were unrelated to make for smoother reading, added a couple of details relating to the session.
 
Hi everybody

Thank you Laura for taking the time to explain to all of us the process and the changes in your life that you attibute to the clainsing of your body, and your head

. This describing is so intens, so vivid that it's difficult for me to tell my first little confrontation with emotional problem.

Aan the beginning of my experience with the breathing programa, I had sometimes what it is called a zoning out . But since a week, I am

overcome by aan intence felling of despair, i begin to cry and i can't stop during the prayer .

I apologize to be so negatief but i think i am not alone in this difficult time
 
Thanks for sharing this, this is really good to know. I've had some episodes of that "cranky when anything happened that was out of the ordinary or not what I wanted or expected" and being "grouchy, irritable, easy to fly off the handle, easily frustrated." And these episodes would happen after periods of greater clarity and operating with higher current in the circuits. So it was discouraging, I felt like I was backsliding or not really making progress. Again, this is helpful to hear of your experiences!

Laura said:
So, yeah, it can be a process and it can last for awhile and it seems that it can involve a lot of different elements and phenomena. It's actually kind of exciting to me to think about it now. Of course, at the time, I was SO afraid - just afraid of about everything. I was afraid of changes, of what I didn't know or understand, or what might happen tomorrow, or next week, and so on. A real worry wart needing to be in control of everything in order to feel semi-secure/safe. I was cranky when anything happened that was out of the ordinary or not what I wanted or expected. I had very little tolerance for anything or anybody that was not under control, so to say. I was grouchy, irritable, easy to fly off the handle, easily frustrated. I had no idea at that time that, 13 months later I would step out of my world and into a totally different reality where "safe" had a completely different meaning.

But it did take about a year to get used to the higher energy flow, the level of emotional content that went with it, and so on.

So, I hope this helps some of you to know some of the things that can happen and how to cope with it. Just remember, this is stuff that is living inside YOU... and you can either clear it out, or continue to stuff it and remain as you are. It's a choice.

But, from where I sit, it sure was worth it!
 
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