I hear ya,
@Fluffy, it’s tough.
I have thought about the question of “What’s the bloody point?” a lot recently, for different reasons. And I have come to the conclusion that this question can only really be answered with “That’s the point!”. Or to formulate it differently, the point is to just trudge along, because there is no sane alternative. All other scenarios either hurt yourself or others that are close to you, and most commonly both. So the point is to go on regardless, despite everything - and to find relief and respite where we can find it, enjoying the little wins and joys where we can. That might sound bleak and devoid of optimism, but it has helped me a lot to navigate those stretches that are devoid of all (or most) of the pleasure that life can - occasionally - offer.
I also had a bit of an epiphany recently, which is loosely connected to the above, although I find it hard to explain the connection in a clear and understandable way: forgiveness.
I read an article somewhere, and of course I didn’t bookmark it, so there is no easy way to retrieve it. The gist of the article was, that forgiveness is a very powerful thing. Even though on the surface of it, it is counterintuitive - after all, if I have objectively been wronged by other people, why should I forgive them for their acts of cruelty, thoughtlessness or indifference? The short answer is that forgiveness of others is intimately connected to self-forgiveness - because if I cannot forgive others, who will ever be forgiving me for my infractions? And on top of that, it eases your burden, because constantly fighting agains yourself takes a ton of energy that we desperately need otherwise to navigate our daily lives. Or in other words, it’s a frightening waste of vital energy.
We all carry baggage from the past, some of which is still painful and ever-present even decades later. I have grappled with such issues for a long time in various formats - psychotherapy, reframing, just trying to ignore it, etc. But these things often turn out to be quite resistant to change. For a while now I have changed tack, and it has been nothing short of incredible.
Every-time my negative introject chastises me, I forgive myself for being who and what I am. And then I let it go. The more I do this, the less these things tend to bother and nag me. It seems to me that it acts a bit like a circuit breaker, because the more I fight against my negative introject, the more power I give to it, and the less able I am to let go of my old ways. It goes without saying that this is not a free pass to act out any negative emotions towards others, but given that we all try to find ways to better ourselves, it works amazingly well.
Not sure if this all makes sense?
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Although, for other reasons, I've also been feeling more overwhelmed and more sleep deprived lately. These are really tough times. Uncertainty, rising prices, wars, a general increase in people's dissatisfaction, quarrels. I've noticed that only people who have some wealth built up still manage to somehow stay calm and happy. Not everyone, of course, but when I look around I see a lot more health problems, friends in hospitals, worrying about rising prices and the general situation, which is combined with fewer and fewer jobs (at least in Poland). When it comes to mental toughness I think the reactions are similar however what prevails is having some financial cushion - this reduces stress. It's as if such an energy vacuum cleaner found everyone where they stood and someone has now turned on the suction. If someone has managed to accumulate energy reserves - they have a little better than others. Ah I know that one should live in the here and now, but lately more than usual I am looking forward to the “new world to discover” because this amount of problems and failures for me personally is overwhelming. Everything ends up working out in some way but you have to put an overwhelming amount of energy into it compared to what it used to be. Even things break more often than usual. At least I have that impression. Hopefully better times will come eventually 
