Positive Resources
Therapeutically, positive resources tap into those elements of a person’s life, psyche, and nervous system that are functional, organized, and coherent. Positive resources tap into either positive states in the moment or the memory of positive life experiences as they are brought to awareness. Positive resources support stability in the body, in the nervous system, and in social relations by promoting self-soothing, relaxation, and increased organization. Pain, emptiness, anxiety, and myriad fears are symptoms of the real problems—the lack of internal organization and the missing capacity for connection.
A hierarchy of resources supports connection and reorganization. Human resources are the most helpful; any person, such as a loving grandparent, an involved teacher, or a mentor, may have been a positive resource whose image can be called upon in the therapeutic process to support re-regulation and reconnection. The more chronic the early trauma, the harder it often is to find human resources, since humans are often experienced as sources of threat. It is not unusual for clients with the Connection Survival Style to feel safer connecting to animals, nature, or God, any of which can function as a positive resource.
Most of us have access to more resources than we realize. It is important for clinicians to remember that if clients are functioning in the world, they are drawing on resources, internal and external. Even in the most chaotic of lives, there are healthy capacities and resources from which to draw. We have all heard about individuals who came from dysfunctional or abusive families who went on to have successful, meaningful lives as adults. When we read their stories, we often see that they remember one or more significant persons in their lives—a grandmother, teacher, aunt—who taught them that, despite their traumatic home life, there was still love and kindness in the world.