So is everybody who is trying to follow your personal drama here. And you are using the mirror in a wrong way, just like Narcissus did, and it killed him. Maybe what could help is body exercises, digging in the dirt / earthworks, gardening, discipline the mind, stop daydreaming and keep the inner dialog in check. But from my own experience I'm not sure anything makes a big difference apart from hardship and suffering, because a Puer will weasel around anything else.I'm tired now, as I've been at it for 12hrs straight. When I'm able to, I'll re-engage.